Chapter 35 - The Fannies Introduction - Part II

(6:55pm)

Backstage, Sharper was beginning to sweat as he started to see the crowd filing into their seats. He was now in a white seersucker suit with tennis shoes.

"Okay...Sharpie...get a hold of yourself! This is the first time that you are hosting the Fannies...in front of 900 people...with the Queen in her royal box overseeing everyone."

Sarah, on the other hand, was giddy and jumping up and down! She was in a pink sundress with a flower crown and silver short heeled shoes.

"Yay! I get to host an awards ceremony!" she exclaimed. "I get to have Kim and Ron come on the stage multiple times, especially with the Best Writer award!"

"Sarah..." Sharper suggested, "...keep your fangirl screams to a minimum. You can scream to your hearts' content at the afterparty."

"Break a leg, Sarah and Sharps!" Cajunbear said in his black tuxedo. Sentinel was wearing his traditional button-down shirt, bowtie and ceremonial kilt.

"Yeah, not unlike that Shakespeare play that we saw last week called Mac..." Sentinel added before Cajunbear put his hand over Sent's mouth.

"Are you insane, Sent? Don't mention the name of that...Scottish play...right here on this ceremony floor!" Cajunbear demanded.

"Why should I not?" Sentinel questioned.

"Legend says that if the name of...that play...would be said during a performance, things will go south! Quickly!" Cajunbear explained the nature of one of theater's most volatile curses.

"Fine...whatever you say, CB!" Sentinel said, rolling his eyes before turning back to the duo.

All they can do was to give a thumbs up, as if not to jinx anyone.

Sharper replied back with a thumbs up of his own.

Jimmy1201, part-time KP fanfic writer and beta reviewer, was taking on the role as coordinator of the orchestra.

"Sharper!" Jimmy said, "The Rockwaller Orchestra is waiting for your cue to start the music up."

"Tell Mr. Harmonic that he can start the orchestral version of the KP Theme Song up in 15 seconds!" Sharper replied.

"Right on it!" Jimmy replied before switching it to Mr. Phil Harmonic.

In the orchestra pit, Mr. Harmonic was ready to strike up the band. Once Jimmy gave the signal, he started up the orchestral KP Theme Song to the 20-piece orchestra.

While playing the intro to Kim's show, the band played along to the theme. Even though there were no words on screen, the veterans that have been in the fandom for more than 2 years, and that was 97% of the population, knew the lyrics by heart.

Once it got to the final notes of the song, the red curtiain was lifted. Sharper and Sarah emerged out onto the front of the stage. About 964 of the 1,296-seat auditorium was filled. Bonnie, of course, occupied the royal box.

"Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, children of all ages, naked mole-rats and mutant animals and visitors from outer space alike!" Sharper proclaimed, "Welcome one and all to the 12th Annual Kim Possible Fannie Awards! I, Sharper the Writer, will be your host for tonight's ceremonies."

He turned to Sarah, "Also assisting me tonight is my co-host, KPRS4ever, or Sarah as she is normally called!"

"Uhm...hi!" Sarah nervously replied, blushing as she was walking across the stage. She tripped on the stage with her silver low heels. The audience, including Kim and Ron, began to gasp.

She got up, saying "I'M OKAY! Ha...I'm okay!"

The audience sighed with relief.

"Sarah! You okay back there!" Sharper asked, wincing. He had remembered that Sentinel nearly said that word.

"I'm all good, Sharper! Continue on!" Sarah insisted.

"As I was saying, she's got the talent, moxie, and skill to help me out with this years' Fannies!" Sharper continued, "She brings a lot of energy to the table!"

Sharper then went into a deep monologue, "The Fannies, once again, almost didn't happen this year. Whitem, whom had hosted the 10th and 11th Fannies Ceremonies, had RL issues bubble up and with Slipgate obviously out due to the same thing, he was in quite a mighty pickle, as we say it in the Deep South. So I took on the challenge of organizing this year's ceremony! Sure there was a slight delay here and there...but as a famous phrase goes: the show must go on!"

"As y'all know, the whole Kimmunity mourns the loss of two familiar faces to our hearts: Timothy North and Nana Possible."

Upon hearing those words in the audience, Kim's normally bright smile faded away into sadness. She remembered what happened when she heard the dreaded news of Nana's losing battle with heart disease and the impending funeral that happened.

"As we'll miss their talents, we'll dedicate tonight's ceremony in honor of their memory."

Sharper then went on to describe the layout of this years' Fannie Awards "Here's how tonight's ceremony will go. We will have 14 segments of the ceremony, presenting two awards each until the final one, where we will announce the last three awards. The winners will be listed in the same order as had been done so in previous years. Also different from other years will be the awards presenters, which will be done by a variety of delegations chosen by yours truly.

He continued onwards, "After the Best Action/Adventure award is presented, there will be a 25-minute intermission with light snacks. Once the ceremony comes to a close, there will be a carving of our hosts' face on Mt. Rockwaller. That is, if Mother Nature does not turn against us. After the carving, or just in case the weather goes south, we'll hold the afterparty in the ballroom, about 3/4 of a mile from the opera house."

"And as per the traditions of the KP elders, we'll present the winners from last year's Fannie Awards!" Sharper went on to proclaim, "Servant 298...dim the lights of the auditorium!"

Servant 298 did so and dimmed the lights.

Two HD LED screens from both the left and the right came down from above the ceiling. After an old movie screen counted down from five, the winners from last years' 11th Fannies Ceremony were listed, accompanied by elevator music:

The 11th Annual KP Fannie Awards Winners:

1) Best KP Style Name: Chi Mira - Best not Broken by chris the cynic

2) Best Original Character: Mask - Action and Reaction by ShadowDancer01

3) Best Minor Character: Yori - Kim Possible: Reaching You by Kawaiigirls5

4) Best Villain: Master - Action and Reaction by ShadowDancer01

5) Best Songfic: Running with the Devil by whitem

6) Best AU: Kim P0ssible: Reaching You by Kawaiigirls5

7) Best Fusion/Crossover: Hybrid by Eddy13

8) Best Alternative Pairing: Cupid has Crappy Aim by Quis Custodiet

9) Best KiGo: Ralph and Sam by only-looking

10) Best Kim/Ron: So the Drama Too by Mahler Avatar

11) Best Comedy: Possible Pirates by Eddy13

12) Best Romance: Rules of a Melon by Imyoshi

13) Best Friendship: First Birthday as Friends by Eddy13

14) Best Action/Adventure: Action and Reaction by ShadowDancer01

15) Best Drama: Bent, not Broken by Chris the Cynic

16) Best One-Shot Overall: A Good Day to Rise by Lhyaran

17) Best Series Overall: A Series of Tests bt whitem

18) Best Unlikely/Unique Story: Attack of the Giant N*** MolerRat by Mahler Avatar

19) Best Novel-Sized Story: Beyond the Stars by Mahler Avatar

20) Best Short Story: So the Drama Too by Mahler Avatar

21) Best Writing Team: No winner

22) Best Young Author: SomeCallMeMichelle

23) Best New Author: The Emperor of Dreams

24) Best Single Line: "She'd been sloppy: rushing through the mission and blowing things up willy-nilly without considering the consequences" - Dear Diary by Simply Supreme

25) Best Reviewer: Invader Johnny

26) CPNEB Kimmunity Award: whitem

27) Kimmunity Achievement Award: Mr. Wizard

28) Best Story Overall: Kim Possible: Reaching You by Kawaiigirls5

29) Best Writer: Mahler Avatar

Once the text came to an end, the twin screens retracted to the ceiling. The lights in the auditorium resumed their brightness.

"Give a round of applause to ShadowDancer01, whom had compiled all the awards winners in the past and continues to be an important part in the Kimmunity!" Sharper said through the microphone.

ShadowDancer stood up and accepted his role in organizing the archives. The audience gave him a round of applause for him.

"We're going to take a short break with a word from our primary sponsor, Rockwaller Beauty Products." Sharper said. "But we'll put in a musical tune for y'all. I think all y'all Parrotheads would enjoy this familiar song!"

On his command, the servant put in the CD with the Fannies' tracks listed above. The first song to be played was Jimmy Buffett's "Come Monday" as the first commercial break played.