Before this chapter starts, I just want to say that I am so sorry that it has been a year. I have had a lot on, with exams and my head, and I found this chapter really hard to write. Anyways, I hope you enjoy it now it is here. I will be finishing this story, so don't worry about that! :)
Lu xxx
Alec had been lying on the sofa staring aimlessly into the distance for three hours now, and Magnus was getting worried. The twins had been sent packing off into Max's room to get them out of the way as soon as they'd got back from the hospital, and Alec had curled up, and not moved since. He wasn't even sleeping. At first he'd cried, his face in Magnus's chest, his hand's clutching at his shirt, and Magnus had held him. Then he'd screamed into the cushions, pushing Magnus away from him. And then, he'd calmed almost scarily to how he was now, blank.
Magnus had tried everything. He'd brought him his favourite coffee, hot chocolate, actual chocolate and even ordered Taki's. It all lay untouched on the coffee table. He'd tried putting Alec's favourite music on, favourite movie on, but nothing. He just stayed there, his eyes tired; clutching a pillow like it was a child's teddy. Magnus had also considered finding Alec's baby teddy, but then he'd remembered that Alec had left it at his parent's house by accident and had never managed to get it back.
Now it had been three hours, and Magnus had really had enough. It wasn't that he wanted Alec to pull himself together – he'd accepted that that wouldn't happen for a while – but he did want him to be at least functional. He sat down in front of Alec, glad not to be pushed off this time, and put his hand on his arm.
"Sweetie, you need to get up. You need to eat something."
Alec shook his head, and a few strands of his hair fell across his eyes. Magnus drew circles just above the crook of his elbow with his thumb.
"Yes. You can't stay here all day, it isn't good for you."
"I don't care."
Magnus tried not to react to this progress.
"Well, I care biscuit."
Alec hid his face into the cushion, avoiding Magnus's gaze.
"We are going to do something right now, even if I have to drag you off the sofa. And you know I will, Alexander." He said sternly, but not unkindly.
Alec shook his head again. Magnus sighed, slapping his thighs and standing up.
"Well, that's it. I'll just have to take the boys to Pandemonium."
At that, Alec shot upwards, throwing the cushion at Magnus and looking horrified.
"Don't you dare!" Magnus rolled his eyes.
"Firstly, I'm offended you think I'd actually do that. Secondly, good, now you're up."
Alec leant his head on Magnus's shoulder.
"I wish we could just run away somewhere and never come back."
Magnus laughed and stroked Alec's hair.
"You can't do that again sweetie. Once is more than enough for everyone. Plus, Jace would go on a rampage."
Alec made a protesting noise, but nothing else. He reached down and grabbed Magnus's hand so hard he felt like his fingers were breaking. He squeezed back encouragingly, not trying to get Alec to release his grip.
"I can't bear the thought of her dying, Magnus. She can't."
"I know."
"I really thought she'd pull through."
"I know."
"We should get married."
"Yes, we've already established that."
"Now."
"What?"
Alec grabbed Magnus by the shoulders, turning them both so that they faced each other.
"We should go get married right now."
Magnus raised an eyebrow.
"I'm going to put this down to grief Alec."
Alec shook his head.
"I'm not kidding! Can you think of a better time?"
Magnus just stared at him for a long time, and he could tell that his eyebrows were raised.
"Yes. Yes, in fact any other time would be better."
Alec gripped his shoulders tighter.
"Think about it. Right now, Izzy's probably not dead yet. If we get married right now, we might be married in her lifetime!"
Magnus gave him a confused look.
"And this would be important to her?"
Alec nodded.
"She's secretly always wanted to see us married. And even if she doesn't see it… she'll still be with us."
Alec was looking on the verge of crying, but also genuinely enthusiastic. It broke his heart. Magnus couldn't say no to him.
"Okay." He whispered. Alec threw his arms around his neck. He was still just shorter than Magnus, so he had to slightly stand on his toes. Magnus had to smile at that.
"Can we maybe see her again after?"
Magnus made a face.
"Alec, that's just going to break you even more."
Alec gave him puppy dog eyes.
"Ok, we'll think about it after we're married. But now, you're going to get changed into your scraggiest sweater, I'm going to make myself fabulous, and then I'm going to pull some strings and get us somewhere to get married. Oh, also get the kids to dress up however they want."
Alec cocked his head to the side.
"I thought you hated my 'crappy sweaters'?"
Magnus kissed him, before moving towards the spare room, in which he'd dumped a few of his favourite things.
"I do, sweetie, but they're you."
About an hour or so later – record time for Magnus, he'd been practising – they were all packed into a cab on the way to Central Park, to the exact same place where his wedding to Camille was supposed to have been. Magnus had called the priest, and he was willing to come at short notice to marry them, even at this time of night. He'd also contacted Clary and Jace, who were going to meet them there as witnesses. Alec was dressed up horribly, Magnus was dressed up fabulously, and the kids were comfy. All was sorted. Except for Magnus's mind, which was suffering from the suddenness of this all. He'd literally been back with Alec what, a couple of weeks? And now they were getting married. But, he'd had eight years, longer really, to think about it, and to be honest, it seemed like the obvious option to him.
Alec was sat in the back of the cab with the boys, leaning his head against the window. It must have been uncomfortable – Magnus could see that his head was being knocked about slightly – but he didn't seem fussed. He looked exhausted; it was close to midnight. When he saw Magnus was looking at him, he smiled though, and there was a hint of happiness there, despite everything. Magnus grinned back, and then looked at the boys. They were talking together in whispers, completely unaware of their dads. It was wonderful.
The journey was short, which was thankful, as Magnus was pretty sure Alec was going to fall asleep, even if this had been his idea. It was a full moon, and so a ghostly white light bathed the park. Clary and Jace were already where the priest was setting up, wrapped in coats and gloves and scarves. Tessa was clinging to her father's legs. Magnus looked over to see Alec smiling sadly at the scene as the walked towards it. He was probably thinking about how it would look with Izzy and Simon and their little one. They had called Simon, just in case, but he'd decided he'd rather stay with Izzy and James.
Jace looked up as they arrived, and smiled weakly at Magnus before hugging Alec, not bothering to either move Tessa or hide the fact he was crying. Clary also looked a bit tearful. Magnus had almost, but not quite, forgotten that they were also losing a sister. He let them have their moment, and did nothing to cut it short. In their own time they drew apart. Jace clapped Alec on the back.
"Did you get the rings?" Magnus asked Jace. He smiled, patting his coat as an answered.
"Thank you, Jace." He said sincerely. Jace inclined his head. The priest cleared his throat.
"Shall we get started then?"
Alec nodded, and looked at Magnus. He twisted their fingers together. Everyone gathered around them, smiling as the wedding started. It was a short ceremony – probably for the best, and Magnus knew Alec didn't really like extravagance. Magnus didn't care about the ceremony; for him, it was the fact that they were getting married that was important. They cried as they said their vows, for a multitude of reasons. Alec's hands were visibly shaking as he slipped Magnus's ring onto his finger, above Camille's old engagement ring, and Magnus was shocked to find he was also trembling when he returned the gesture. Then, the priest finally said the words.
"I am now over the moon to pronounce you husband and husband. You may now kiss."
Alec wasted no time in grabbing Magnus around the waste and pulling him close. He pressed their lips together, and then they were kissing and hugging all at once. Magnus closed his eyes, revelling in the feeling of Alec's lips, which he'd missed for so long. Alec was crying, he noticed, the tears falling between their mouths, tasting salty and bitter. Magnus didn't try to deepen the kiss – right then, they didn't need that. Instead, he drew back, with no protest from Alec. He leant his forehead down, resting it against Alec's, their noses touching lightly. In that moment, there was no one around them.
"We finally did it then." We whispered, barely. They were so close that they were breathing each others air. Alec chuckled, and Magnus could feel it vibrate through his chest.
"Yeah. Who would've thought?"
"Me." Alec slapped him on the arm lightly.
"Stop being so cheesy."
"Mais je suis cent pour cent fromage, Alec!"
"Magnus, your French is terrible." Magnus smiled.
"Maybe. But you love it." Alec smiled back.
"Yeah." Magnus held Alec's hand down either side of them, and kissed him again.
"I'm so surprised Jace hasn't made a sarcastic comment by now."
"If he does, he is dead."
The seven of them were lying on the grass, looking up at the stars. Max, Will and Tessa were curled up together, all asleep, limbs and hair entangled. Clary was snuggled up with them too, eyes, her blinks getting slower, and Jace was lying next to her, absent mindedly stroking her long hair. The grass was damp from the earlier rain, and it was soaking through Magnus's very expensive shirt, but he didn't care. Alec's hands were entwined with his, and he was rubbing circles on the back of one of them with his thumb gently. This was perfect – exactly what, in the end, he'd always imagined their wedding being like, not like the wedding he'd always talked about. Nothing fancy; just him and Alec, together, under the stars, with everyone they loved. Maybe not so perfect. Not without Izzy.
He could tell it was getting to Alec again now. He seemed quiet and withdrawn, and although he was outing on a brave face and smiling softly, Magnus just knew that he wanted to break down and cry. He leant over to whisper in his ear.
"How're you holding up?"
"I'm fine." Magnus rested his head down by Alec's.
"You're not though, are you?" Alec shook his head.
"Not really, no." He moved his head too, resting it onto Magnus's chest, his hand next to it.
"Do you want to go?" Alec shook his head for a second time.
"I don't want to ruin the evening." Magnus laughed without feeling.
"Sweetie, you wouldn't be ruining the evening. You being restless like this might though." Alec took a deep breath.
"Magnus, do you think they'd let us see her at this time of night."
"Well, technically no. But realistically, probably."
"Would you be ok if we went?"
"Of course, but I think it would be best if the boys didn't come."
"Agreed." The two of them stood up, then walked over to Jace, who appeared to have just woken Clary up – she was rubbing her eyes and making grumbling noises.
"Jace, would you mind looking after the boys tonight? Alec wants to go back to see Izzy, and it would probably be better if they weren't there, if that makes sense."
Jace nodded sleepily.
"Well, I'm about to take my girls back anyway. Do you want me to drop them off tomorrow, or…" Jace raised an eyebrow suggestively. Somehow, Magnus found himself laughing and not growling at his new brother in law.
"We will pick them up when it suits us, if that's ok with you."
"Perfectly ok. I hope it isn't too bad." Jace said, clapping Magnus on the shoulder. Magnus nodded, and then grabbed Alec's hand. They wandered like that together out of the park, towards the road.
It had been tough to be allowed into the hospital, but with some very angry shouting from a very determined Magnus, and a lot of tears from a very distressed Alec, they'd finally been allowed to go past the desk. They were stood in the lift now. It had reached the floor of Izzy's room, and the doors were open, but Alec wasn't getting out. He was stood, his hands so tense that Magnus could almost see the red marks from his nails on his palms. Magnus's hand was on his back between his shoulder blades.
"Alec, biscuit, we need to get out of the lift. Someone else is going to want to use it."
Alec gave Magnus a look. He shrugged.
"Ok, so maybe it's too late for that. But we've come so far. It would be silly not to go see Isabelle now, after all that fuss, wouldn't it?" He said it gently, encouragingly – not harsh at all.
"Alright." Alec stepped out of the lift, Magnus following quickly. The metal doors shut with a clang, but neither of them looked back. Instead, they walked along the corridor. There were no nurses or doctors in it, all in the individual rooms or performing late night emergency surgery. It was hauntingly quiet, and their footsteps echoes like muffled cannon fire.
Eventually, they came to Izzy's room. Alec didn't even to stop to look at Magnus as he opened the door. Magnus squeezed his shoulder, feeling awful for him. It was courageous for him to come back again to share the further exciting news, even if he'd already said his goodbyes. But Magnus understood it. And anyways, even if he didn't, it was something that Alec felt like he needed to do, and it was his privilege to support him in that.
Alec stepped into the room, and then after a second backed out, clinging onto the door frame with support. He looked back at Magnus over his shoulder, and fell onto him, burying his face in Magnus's chest. Magnus clutched back, holding him up.
"Sweetie, what is it?"
"Magnus… she's not in there anymore."
Please leave reviews, they make me smile! And don't worry, I will be updating soon, and it will explain all.
(By soon, I mean I won't leave it a year again!)
Anyway, thanks for reading, it means a lot. You are all magical.
Lu xxx