Awakening
I own nothing, if you think I do then I'm afraid that Insania's Realm has claimed you. You have my pity.
I chuckled weakly as I watched as Dad jabbed Bruce with the little rod again. We were all bored, waiting for the program to find the cube. Well, Dad and Bruce were bored. I was trying to ignore the growing feeling dread in my stomach and the twisting of my Soul that were my Duties trying to get me to visit Loki.
I remained silent, just enjoying the time with Bruce and Tony as I tried to ignore the ball of dread that had grown into a chilling feeling of despair that gripped my whole body.
Dad and Bruce had a game going, Dad would jab Bruce with the rod whenever he wasn't paying attention and Bruce would throw pens at Tony whenever he wasn't paying attention. It was like a little war between three year olds.
I was just glad that Bruce was relaxing a bit.
It had been funny at first, Bruce had thought that Dad was insane with how many times he kept getting zapped, and then he realized that he was just bored and that Tony was being Tony, and let it go.
I really tried to hold onto the memory of them bonding, something told me that darkness was coming, and I was going to miss these times.
I didn't like the feeling, and I really was trying to ignore it. But it wasn't letting me.
Every smile I gave Dad and Bruce was forced, every laugh sounded hollow in my ears, I was just detached from the good times that the boys were having.
It happened quickly, one moment I had been fine, and then my Soul had surged with my duties, and the ball of dread had exploded into ...this…
The very feeling of sorrow was flowing in my veins and the remainders of the ball felt like small knives that were stabbing into the side of my stomach with nausea. My eyes felt sore and it was like my very body was warning me of the pain that was to come.
Even though I tried to stop it, my imagination was running wild, creating scenario after scenario of what could be to come.
Tony dying, Bruce dying, Fati taking me back under her control, cities being leveled, Pepper dying, Tony being put into a coma, SHIELD finding me and arresting Dad, Loki killing everyone, the world burning, me being all alone once again….all of these scenes and more flashed in my mind. I tried to block them out, I tried to focus on the moment, but it just wasn't working.
It was like the very universe had wrapped me in a bubble of despair and I couldn't break loose.
I made no sense, how fast these feelings had taken hold of me, it was like a switch had been flipped and I was still blinded by the darkness. But what could I do? Shove it to the back of my mind? I had already tried that, but the emotions of warning flooding my very being refused to be hidden away. They wanted me to pay attention to them; they wanted me to know that something was coming.
Jarvis' voice suddenly broke through the dark storm that was my thoughts and never before had I been happy that Rogers interrupted us.
"Sir, Captain Rogers is approaching." Jarvis said and I instantly faded from sight.
I curled up in my chair, as I pushed it back against the wall with my Sparks. The emotions flooding my systems were slowly becoming painful, and I had a feeling that my time in this room was coming to an end.
"Ouch!" Bruce hissed as Dad jabbed him again. "Tony, are you going to quit that any time soon?"
Bruce gave Dad a slightly annoyed look, which Tony just rolled his eyes to. A small smile appeared on my lips but it wasn't true...I couldn't feel amused at Dad's antics, and that scared me.
"Nope," Dad said as he popped the "P". "Besides, if Hulk really got all hot and bothered about this stupid little thing, you would've snapped it in half a while ago."
Dad smirked at Bruce as he twirled the rod in his fingers. Bruce sighed and shook his head.
"To be honest, the Big Guy's finding this very amusing. So the only one you have to worry about annoying, is me." Bruce's eyebrow twitched but I saw a hidden smile on his lips. He was enjoying this as much as I should have been.
"Seriously?" Dad asked intrigued, before pouting. "Well, that takes all of fun out of that."
Tony continued pouting and Bruce sighed before turning his attention towards the holographic readings floating around the room.
Dad suddenly smirked and as soon as Bruce wasn't looking he poked him in the shoulder with the rod, again.
"Tony!" Bruce looked at him like he really wanted to hit him, or have Hulk smash him.
"It's not doing anything," Dad shrugged with a playful smirk. "You said so yourself."
"It's annoying me." Bruce said as Tony suddenly spun around and tried to jab him again. However Bruce had reached his limit and snatched it out of his hand.
"Aw," Dad pouted with a twinkle in his eye, "Party pooper."
I tried to chuckle, I really did. But all that came out was a strangled wince as a dead feeling settled in my stomach.
Bruce rolled his eyes and I saw Rogers standing in the doorway. Bruce and Dad didn't notice his appearance so they didn't stop their little argument.
"Hey!" Rogers exclaimed as Tony tried to grab the rod back from Bruce.
Both of the scientists froze, and turned to look at the spandex wearing man striding further into the lab. He was glaring at Tony with a disapproving look on his face.
"Are you insane?!" Rogers exclaimed in shock, staring at Tony like he had grown two heads.
Bruce turned and smirked at my father.
"See?" he said as he pointed to Rogers, "I'm not the only one that thinks so!"
Tony and I heard the teasing tone in Bruce's voice, Rogers, however, didn't.
"Well, the jury's still out on that, and teaming up won't help you win, Bruce." Tony said with a smirk. Winking, so only Bruce and I saw it he continued.
"I bet a lot of people here are wondering what you secret is, Brucey-boy." Tony stated and Bruce's eyebrow twitched.
"Don't call me that." Bruce stated before shaking his head. "I'm sure they are Tony,"
Bruce glanced between the two other men, obviously sensing the tension between them. Rogers was glaring at Tony now and I saw realization appear on the man's face.
Bruce had figured out what the next game with Tony was: Annoy Captain Rogers.
"Well, are you going to share with the group?" Dad asked with a smirk, "Is it…"
However, Bruce cut him off and this time a weak smile did manage to break through the dark emotions coursing through me.
"No, it's not mellow Jazz, bongos, yoga, or a huge bag of weed." Bruce drawled as Rogers' eyebrow twitched.
The music suddenly increased in noise as the next song started, causing Rogers' eyebrow to twitch again.
Finally, as Tony burst out laughing (at the look on Rogers face,) he said, "Is everything a joke to you?"
"Well, funny things are, but I have a gift to find amusement anywhere." Dad replied with a smirk at the man who Howard always ranted on about.
"Threatening the safety of everyone on this ship isn't funny…no offence Doc." Rogers back tracked and added on, hoping not to irritate the doctor.
Bruce just rolled his eyes and replied, "Don't you worry Cap. I wouldn't have agreed to come if I couldn't handle small, sharp, irritating objects. Or deal with annoying people."
He gave Tony a pointed but playful glare that caused him to smirk.
"You know doc, even after all of this you're still treading around lightly. You need to strut." Tony stated causing Bruce to chuckle.
"My strutting is disguised, so don't blow its cover." Bruce stated with another smirk that caused Rogers to be confused.
Shaking his head he said, "You, Mr. Stark, need to focus on the problem at hand."
He gave my father a disapproving look that really did make him look like a disappointed grandparents.
"He definitely has that look down." I muttered as my Soul twisted in pain. With a sigh I decided that as soon as Rogers left, I would go see why my Duties thought that I needed to see Loki.
"You think I'm not?" Dad asked gesturing to all of the holograms floating around the room. "I am focused Rogers, just one more than one problem. Ponder this, Capsicle: why did Fury call us in, why now? Why not before? What's he keeping a secret that's so huge I can see him sweating about it from here? I can't do equations without all of the variables."
"Well, you did pretty well not knowing about me for a few months." I stated, though my voice was strained and darker than normal.
A look of worry flashed across Tony's face, but it was gone before anyone else could see it.
"Debatable." Tony muttered under his breath as Bruce glanced at where I was in confusion. We hadn't exactly told him the whole story, so he didn't know that Tony only found out about me a year ago.
"You think that Fury's hiding something?" Rogers asked, glancing at Bruce to hear his thoughts.
Bruce nodded as Tony continued, "He's a spy, come one Cap, he's literally "the" spy. His secretes have secrets and I, for one, want to know what's really going on."
He pulled a bag of raspberries out of his pocket and tossed the snack into his mouth. My eyebrow twitched as I recognized them from my stash back at the Tower but didn't say anything. I needed feel the need to.
Another worried look flashed across his face as he threw a handful of the red berries into his mouth. Now that I thought about it, I couldn't remember the last time I had seen Dad eat. Damn, he must be hungry.
"Doctor?" Rogers asked, obviously at his wits end with my father.
"Yes, Tony's right." Bruce sighed as he put down the rod and leaned back against the desk. "Did you pay attention to Loki's jab at Fury? "A warm light for all of Mankind" pretty out of the blue. I've concluded it means two things that just might be the same thing.
"I think he was aiming that at Tony." Bruce stated to the Captain's shock as Dad held out the bag of berries to the doc.
Bruce shrugged and grabbed a handful, "Think about it Cap, even if Barton didn't tell Loki about Stark Tower, it's been all over the news."
"Stark Tower? You mean that big, ugly…" The Cap interrupted, and then backtracked as Dad glared heatedly at him. "...building in New York?"
Tony looked like he was about to punch the blonde, and I had to agree with him. The blonde was annoying, and not the good kind.
I winced as my Soul twisted and my Duties practically yelled at me. The despair was growing and I had no idea what to do, or why I was even feeling this way.
"The Tower's powered by an Arc Reactor, a self-sustaining energy force. Fury said that he was studying the Cube as a way to discover a clean source of energy. If that's true, why didn't he bring Tony in on this?" Bruce asked, bringing Tony back into the conversation.
"I'm the only name in clean energy at the moment, not that I'm complaining, it's good for sales, but still." Tony shrugged and ate more of the berries.
"Not to mention, what on earth is SHIELD doing in the energy business in the first place?" Bruce continued the explanation, knowing that Rogers was more likely to listen to him then Dad.
Tony and Bruce shared a hidden smirk as Rogers thought about what they had said, this was what they wanted.
"So I've been looking into it." Dad stated as he pulled a hologram closer to him. "I don't have everything yet, my decryption program on SHIELD's heavily guarded files, and I'll have it in less than an hour."
Bruce's lips twitched at the lie, we already had the info and files, and I knew what Fury was up to.
"I'm sorry, did you just say…" Rogers started but Dad interrupted with a shrug and a hidden smirk.
"Jarvis has been running it since I hit it Bridge. I would have broken through already but Jarvis' already overworked with the searching program as well. It's not as hard as it sounds, SHIELD has beyond lousy firewalls." Dad smirked at the look of horror on Rogers face and tapped on a few holograms that took Rogers picture, though he didn't know that.
"I already have everything else on SHIELD; this is just the last piece of the puzzle, raspberry?" Tony asked as he offered the bag of berries to the man.
Rogers ignored the offer and he looked very irritated, "And you're confused as to why they don't want you around."
Dad raised an eyebrow in shock and Bruce looked the man over. "Was that sarcasm I just heard? Well, it's rough but we'll work on that."
Tony chuckled before continuing, "I'm not confused on the matter, Rogers. I don't care if SHIELD likes me or not. Cause we don't agree on a lot of things. But still, and intelligence organization that fears intelligence, a bit contradictory if you ask me."
He randomly tossed two icons into the trash and pulled up two more, blocking his face from Rogers view as he stuck his tongue out at the man.
Highway to Hell started playing and the Cap twitched in irritation. "Loki's trying to wind us up, this's a man who means to start a war, and if we don't stay focused he'll succeed."
"I'm focused Cap, we both are. I'm just curious as to what you're focusing on. See, I like focusing on the big picture, having whole problem in front of me. What's your focus here, Rogers?"
"We have orders, we should follow them." Rogers stated and all three of us rolled our eyes. Life wasn't about following orders...even if I had to follow my Duties.
"Following's not really my style Rogers, I like forging my own path. Breaking a few rules and walls along the way are just bonuses." Dad smirked as he leaned against the wall.
"And you're all about style, aren't you?" Rogers stated with narrowed eyes. Tony rolled his eyes, and shook his head.
I just shook mine sadly, even being all emotionally screwed up at the moment; I knew that until Rogers bothered to look deeper into Dad's little games he was staying on my bad list.
"Okay then Rogers; of the people in this room who's one, in spandex tights, two, annoying everyone, and three, not of any use?" Dad drawled as he turned his back on the man, and started humming along to the song.
"Steve, come one, tell me none of this doesn't smell a bit funky to you." Bruce asked trying to get the man to open his eyes to what was really going on.
"Just find that Cube." Steve stated as he turned away with a scowl, "And aren't these song more than a bit violent?"
Bruce shrugged and replied, "Hulk likes them."
"Besides, our lab, our rules." Dad remarked scathingly, showing that his patience was gone. With another disapproving look Rogers stalked out of the lab.
"He's annoying." I stated coldly as I reappeared, hoping that neither men noticed anything wrong with me.
"Seriously," Dad agrees with me, a look of disbelief on his face. "That's the guy my father wouldn't shut up about? I'm wondering if it would have been better to've kept him on the ice." Bruce snorted, and I mentally agreed.
I winced as my Soul screamed at me, and the despair that had flooded me turned ice cold, causing my Core to flicker and my head to explode in pain. Knowing that I couldn't ignore it anymore I stood.
The despair grew, like a leech on my Soul as I stepped closer to my father. Bruce and Dad turned towards me almost instantly, and Dad's face contorted in worry.
"Pen, what's wrong?" Tony asked me, and before he could finish his sentence I threw my arms around him and for the second time that day my head was on his shoulders.
Tears flooded my vision and threatened to fall as I clung to my father tighter, I didn't know why...but for some reason this felt final.
"Tell me it'll be alright." I whispered into his ear as he wrapped his arms around my waist. I tried to ignore the fact that my voice broke halfway through my request or that Bruce could probably hear us. I didn't care; I just knew that something was going to happen.
"Weren't you the one telling me that everything was going to be ok not too long ago?" Dad whispered back as his grip on me tightened.
"I know." I sighed, and winced as my voice broke again. "B...but I can't promise that anymore."
Dad sighed and brokenly asked, "Promise that you'll come back?"
I tried to ignore the fact that Dad's voice cracked and that I could hear his heart fluttering, but I couldn't.
The tears slipped down my cheeks as my heart constricted in my chest. My very being was screaming in emotional agony, and I didn't know why.
"Can't promise that either." I stated with a sob and cling tighter to my father, the only family I had left. I wanted to know why, why my Duties were telling me this, why I felt like this was the end.
"Pen…" Tony choked out, his voice nothing more than a gasp, "Why does it sound like you're saying goodbye?"
My eyes closed as the tears ran down my cheeks, "I love you Daddy."
"I love you too baby," Tony whispered, and I choked back a sob, he had never called me that before...as far as I could remember.
I didn't want to let go, I didn't want to face whatever was coming. But I didn't have much of a choice. Even if I didn't know what my Realm was, I still had my Duties.
I couldn't look at Daddy, knowing that I was probably not going to come back.
I didn't know why I felt this way, but it was just something that my very Soul was telling me.
I didn't want to let go, I didn't want to move. But as my Duties called to me again I let my sparks flare; and I vanished from my father's arms.
If you've read this before, you know what's going to happen.
This is a lot darker than it's supposed to be, but then, I'm in a dark mood.
Please review….it'll help me…
Cp