Awakening

*Hides behind couch from hounds in suits* JK and Disney own everything go after them!
*Does nothing*
Um...they have stake?
*lawyer turned hounds don't leave* um… *sweatdrop*

Tony's POV

I scowled to myself as I gazed unseeingly across the empty room that once held Loki's cell. Part of me wished that I could just go back to Malibu, or even the Tower, and crawl into my workshop and forget everything. But I couldn't exactly leave, so here I was, trying to get a scrap of solitude in a nest of spies.

My mind was still a mess, and even though I knew that Penny was alright, and that we would make it through this...I couldn't help but wonder if this was going to keep happening. Problem after problem, chaos after chaos, fight after fight...I couldn't keep losing her. Neither my heart nor my mind would stand it.

Heroes are supposed to protect people, keep them safe…bring them hope. How could I be a hero to the world if I couldn't even keep my own daughter safe, or my own hope alive?

"No one knew she existed, did they? I mean, did she even have any friends? A boyfriend perhaps?"

Rogers' voice broke through my thoughts, but I didn't even spare the man a glance. Oh, so now he wanted to connect with me? And over my daughter's social life of all things...that was rich coming from him.

There was a moment of silence as I contemplated whether or not it was worth it to reply. After that moment I glanced at Rogers, and saw that he wasn't leaving any time soon.

I closed my eyes with a sigh, and gripped the railing tighter. Fine, I would play twenty questions.

"People knew she existed," I said softly, but my voice echoed across the room. "They just didn't know her as Stark. Her aliases were many, and most of them are believed dead. In the beginning I didn't even know she was my daughter...and then, it was just I. As the months went on though, a few other people started discovering. First it was Rhodey, then Coulson and Pepper. I tried my hardest to keep SHIELD or the rest of the world from finding out...but it seemed like the bad guys always knew."

A bitter laugh erupted from my throat, as I continued, tears prickling in my eyes.

"I thought that for once something good might happen, I thought that we would be able to handle this. But like I said...things always go wrong, in one way or another." I looked over at Rogers and noticed how distressed he looked; I chuckled again and watched as he flinched. "Besides, why are you asking me this now?"

"I guess... I guess it finally hit me how much you've lost." Rogers shrugged a soft quality to his voice.

Whipping around I glared at the man, my gaze deadly. "I don't need your pity!" I spat, venom in my voice. I put up with him being a dick, and an asshole. But the one thing I would not stand for was pity. I loathed it almost beyond anything else.

I got the temptation to deck him again, and clenched my fists. Oh, the fine line…

"You don't have it." Rogers stated firmly, surprising me. I looked at him in slight apprehension, why had his personality suddenly one a one-eighty? Could his previous attitude be blamed completely on Loki's puppet king? Or was this all just another game that I had yet to discover?

I eyed the man wearily as he walked over, and I couldn't help but tense as he placed his hand on my shoulder.

"You have my sympathies."

My eyes widened, and for a moment I didn't shake his hand off, but then my mind snapped back into action and I shrugged him off. Turning away from the man a small frown sneaked through my mask.

Was this the real Captain, or was the old one?

I almost groaned, why did things have to be so complicated?

Deciding that be best course of action was to just roll with it, I finally replied, "Didn't seem that way earlier."

I could practically feel his wince from here, and more of the puzzle pieces fell into place.

"I...I truly don't know what came over me." He admitted, his voice practically overflowing with self-loathing. "I know that I don't deserve it...and I know that you would have every right in the world to hate me…"

"Drop it," I stated, interrupting his little sob story. I was so not in the mood for a heart to heart with the guy my father adored. "Besides, it was Loki."

"Perhaps," Rogers shrugged, and his voice sounded like thin ice. I decided not to push it. If the man wanted to tear himself up about it he was welcome to. I didn't give a shit.

"She did…" I found myself saying, answering his second and third questions. I didn't know why I was talking with him; I didn't know why I didn't just find another quiet place to think.

"What?" Rogers exclaimed in confusion, his eyebrows knitted together. I chuckled at the look on his face.

"Pen," I explained with a low chuckle. "She did have friends...even a boyfriend."

"Oh," He replied, unsure of what to say. I tried not to see the unsure look he was giving me, but it was too hard to ignore, especially when he asked, "And her mother?"

My eyes clenched shut as the unwanted memories flooded my mind, and my heart clenched. "Dead." I managed to choke out without my voice wavering too much.

Evanna's face flashed in my mind's eye and my jaw clenched, I didn't need to think about her...not now…

"It'd been years…" my voice was almost a whisper, and I didn't even know why I was telling him this. He had been nothing short of an ass to me and Pen since arriving on the 'carrier… "Didn't even know Pen existed until she became my second PA…"

I chuckled at the memories as Rogers gapped at me in shock.

"She became your secretary?! But she was just a kid!" He exclaimed, his mind trying to make sense out of it.

I chuckled again and shook my head; he was channeling Pepper now...great.

"True," I admitted as I stared out across the room, leaning on the railing. "But she was a brilliant kid none the less...best qualifications I had seen for the position...besides, I wasn't an idiot. Technically she was my PA's PA so she wasn't over worked…"

My voice trailed off as I thought about the simple times, when I thought Pen was really Telnets and it was just the three of us...then the two of us, the two Starks against the world…

"You're gonna have to explain this to me eventually." Rogers chuckled and I nodded absently.

Things had really been much simpler back then.

"I'm sorry,"

I snorted but didn't reply. I had already told him once that I didn't want his pity.

"Don't apologize," I mumbled as I turned away from the man. "...she just wasn't' thinking...I don't know why she wasn't thinking…"

I threw my hands into my pockets, and my hand gripped my phone tightly, I had tried not to open it...I didn't want to see the face that would be staring up at me if I did…

"Wasn't thinking about what Stark? Talking to Loki? Getting in a fight with Romanoff and the other agents? You're the one who let her come along, if you wanted to keep her safe…"

"I didn't let her do anything!" I yelled at the man, spinning on my heel and giving him my best death glare.

He just stared at me, and after a moment I spun back around, swearing that he hadn't seen the tears in my eyes.

"But I didn't try to stop her either…" I muttered to myself.

Why hadn't I stopped her? I had known that something was wrong, my gut had been clinging to the girl all day...and I had let her go anyways. I should have made her stay with me and Bruce...I should have put my foot down…

"Stark, she sounds like she was a good kid." Rogers sighed and I locked my jaw so I wouldn't punch him again. Penny hadn't been great...she was amazing… "Sounds like she was a lot like you, a smart alec…"

Narrowing my eyes I stalked towards the exit. I had no intention of listening to him as he went off on my daughter again! Dead or not, she deserved more respect!

"...brilliant, there was nothing you could've done Stark." I froze as Rogers' voice got louder. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.

Don't turn around...just keep walking. Ignore him…

"What?"

Damn, I mentally cursed my tongue as I turned around again, narrowing my eyes at the man.

He looked at me with a stupid, compassion filled expression on his face and once again I wanted to punch it off. God, I wanted to punch the man a lot.

"If she was anything like you, and I think she was, then there was nothing you could've done. I doubt she would've let you stop her; not if it was something she really wanted to do." Rogers continued softly, his blue eyes wide.

"I still should have tried!" I protested, just like my guilt had been protesting with my logic all day. "I should've stopped her from leaving the lab, I knew that something was going to go wrong...my gut had been telling me all day...I should have protected her!"

I wasn't even talking to Rogers anymore, I was snarling at myself, berating myself for letting this happen again…

"Tony, it's Pen. She would've let you."

I looked up to see Coulson standing in the doorway. My shoulders slumped and I looked away.

"Rogers is right, she's too stubborn; she was too much like you." Coulson continued as he walked towards us.

I closed my eyes as my mask cracked more, and the walls around my heart and mind crumbled even father. The abyss in my mind was practically screaming at me and God...how I wished Hel was here to make the pain all go away…

Or better yet, Pen…

"Just leave me alone." I grumbled as I turned away from the two again, why couldn't they just leave me alone? I really didn't need this right now, I wasn't even sure if I could do this right now.

"Look...I know it's hard, but we need to deal with Loki...so you need to try to pull yourself together…"

I spun around again and glared at the blonde. "My fucking daughter is dead, and I'm on the edge of the emotional breakdown; so don't you dare tell me to pull it together!"

My voice was a dark growl that almost sounded animalistic as it came out of my throat. I glared at both men, Coulson was shaking his head slightly, and I could see his own pain in his eyes.

"I know that this is your first time losing a soldier…"

"Soldier!" I snarled, and I saw Coulson wince out of the corner of my eye. Wrong thing to say! "We aren't soldiers! She was a kid! My kid! My daughter, my baby girl! So you can shove it up your ass! I'm not doing this for you Rogers; I'm not doing this for Fury, or Coulson or anyone. I'm doing this because Penny, my daughter told me that it was the right thing to do! I'm here for her, I'll take care of Loki, make no mistake but that's it! No more, no less.

"And once Loki and his puppet master is taken care of," My voice took on a sadistic tone here that literally had the other men's eyes widening in fear. "I'm gonna deal with the person who shot my daughter; and make no mistake. One way or another, she'll pay."

Coulson's eyes widened and I wondered if he had put it together yet, either way, everyone would know soon enough.

Rogers apparently was brave, because he opened his big mouth again.

"Look, I'm not doing this for Fury either; he has the same blood on his hands as Loki. But we can deal with that once Loki is no longer trying to become Earth's overlord. We need to put this behind us, all of it...at least for the time being." Rogers said and I sighed. The man just didn't understand, he hadn't known Pen...he wasn't a father.

Hmm...maybe I would punch him…

"Now, Loki still needs a power source for the Tesseract, so if you could put together a list…" Rogers continued, and my eyebrow twitched.

Coulson must've sensed the danger the man was in because he quickly interrupted, "Rogers, perhaps you should…"

I interrupted his interruption, and I wondered if anyone was actually going to be able to finish their thought.

"He made it personal," I stated coldly, glaring at the man. "Everyone here has. You don't need to tell me what to do Rogers, I'm aware of the situation and have already dealt with it!"

"That's not the point…" Rogers argued and I glared at the idiot.

"Yes, yes it is!" I exclaimed, wondering how the others hadn't figured this out yet. Hadn't I already explained? "I've already said this, must I spell everything out? He wanted to get to us! He wanted us rattled and clawing at each other's throats! That's why his mumbo jumbo was making everyone angrier than Hulk on a bad day! He wanted this to be personal, he did with Penny, he tried with Coulson...god it's as clear as day!

"He hit us all right where it hurts; he struck at the wedges that divided us and then the one that connected us….with a bit of help from Fury...but still. He stuck where he knew it would hurt us the most, but he wasn't trying to kill us. So why? What does it matter? He wanted to tear us apart, Rogers! I've said this once, and I'll keep saying it. He wanted us too busy fighting each other, and though I loath to admit it, it's gone wonderfully for him!"

Nope, I was not admitting that I was fueling that fire between all of us, I had every right. Everyone knew it, if they were smart, so there was no reason for me to say it.

I literally watched as Rogers caught up, and Coulson was nodding. "Divide and conquer, like you said, it is the oldest trick in the book."

"But it doesn't seem like his MO…" Rogers mumbled, still unsure. I rolled my eyes at the man, and wished that Pen was here to have some scathing remark.

"His MO? Rogers, this is his MO written in red ink stamped all over your face!" No, I didn't snicker when I said this, I didn't at all. "He's messing with us, playing us; he's been doing so from the beginning! He's the God of Mischief and Lies for a reason! He rattles our cage, pisses us off, and then sits back and watches as we go after him! He wants an ego booster like none other!" I exclaimed and finally Rogers caught up to where I had already been for a while now.

"Yeah...I saw his act in Germany." Rogers commented and I felt like patting him on the head. But I didn't, now wasn't the time.

"We all saw it, but that was just the preview. That was just a taste of what's to come. He's a diva and this is his opening act; it's the big deal. He's gonna want a captivated audience," I started pacing like I usually did when I was on a roll. Ranting about Pen had let Loki's actions retake the attention of my mind, and now it was all spewing out for the world to see.

"Full time drama queen," Coulson muttered to himself but I nodded in agreement anyway. He was right after all.

"Exactly," I exclaimed and Coulson stepped forward, he was the only one out of the two used to my random data rants after all.

"He wants the whole package, flowers, parades, trophies, he wants it all. A full house, everyone captivated. He wants to be worshiped; he wants everyone to know his name. Fuck, he wants a memorable monument, towering sky high with his name plastered on the…"

I froze as my conscious caught up with the rest of my brain.

"Fucking son of a bitch…" I practically breathed, but much louder.

"This isn't good." Coulson commented as Rogers continued to look confused. He also had realized where I had been going. Pressing his hand to his ear he said, "We have Loki's location."

Coulson turned and I followed him quickly towards the door, we needed to get to the Bridge, now.

"What? We do? Where?" Rogers asked and I wondered if the super soldier serum had reduced his brain cells.

"Stark Tower." Coulson and I said at the same time as we exited the room, and strode quickly down the hallway.

"Did you get that Jarvis?" I muttered to myself, knowing that the AI in my com and SHIELS's speakers would hear me.

"Of course sir. Locking down the Tower now, however, there seems to be something already attached to the Reactor. I am unable to disconnect it." Jarvis reported and I cursed.

Loki had taken my invention and turned it into a battery for his evil plans! That was not ok; the Arc was one of my babies.

"Shut down the Reactor," I ordered, and ignored the looks that Rogers was sending me. Coulson was used to Jarvis after all.

"I'm afraid that I cannot sir," Jarvis reported, his voice irritated.

I sighed, of course. With that much energy being drawn from the Reactor, it wouldn't be able to shut down until it was disconnected.

I was snapped out of my thoughts as a shadow nearby lengthened, and Mortem appeared. He didn't say a thing, nor did I, but no words were needed.

His eyes were lighter, silver instead of black, and he nodded to me a smile on his face.

As we passed him I nodded back, my heart suddenly lighter than it had been a moment before.

Penny was back...she was ok! I almost jumped with joy; my baby girl was ok…

Suddenly, it was like a weight had been lifted off my back and the abyss in my mind receded once again.

'Thank you' I mouthed and he shook his head.

I'm not the one you should be thanking. Black sparks wrote above his head, and I tilted my head in confusion. I could tell that he was annoyed with not being able to take the claim of rescuing Penny.

I turned back around to see Mortem now walking beside me, and I swore I saw a pout on his face. Though I was confused, if Mortem hadn't saved Pen, then Hel couldn't have (as she had been with me, and was less powerful than her boss) and Insania...well, ok I had no idea about that girl. She was a complete wild card.

She is Mortem agreed, and I didn't even flinch. I was used to Mortem responding to my thoughts by now. But, that turned out to be a good thing. She is the one responsible.

Insania saved Penny? My eyes widened and I ignored the worried looks I was getting from Rogers.

Mortem nodded, and with a dark but thankful look he said, More than you know. It might take her a bit to get back on her feet, but she's ok. She'll be back soon.

Mortem gave me a nod and vanished, leaving one last message in the air. Just keep Loki busy until she gets back.

I smirked, and ignored the others around me. Oh, I could do that.

I chuckled, Penny was ok! Man, was Loki going to regret messing with my family!

'Mortem's a great son-in-law...'

I froze, just for a moment, before I started walking again, a horrified look on my face.

Did I seriously just think that?

No! No I didn't!

Ha, third chapter today! Well, I need to get to bed...school tomorrow and everything (and I'm over my computer curfew...oops :/ )

Hope you liked it!
Penny comes back next chapter!
Cp