The Weiss Reacts Anniversary Special!
A/N: Welcome, one and all, to a VERY SPECIAL chapter of Weiss Reacts! Yes, that's right, it's one year to the day Weiss Reacts Volume One was released! That's right, one year since the insanity began! You guys are probably not as psyched about this as I am! This chapter will be different in format from the others, as it'll just be a bunch of vignettes which I never really saw fit to make an entire chapter out of.
Let's get this chapter going before you guys get bored of my ranting again!
DISCLAIMER: RWBY belongs to Rooster Teeth, otherwise there would be a Neo plushie.
All mentioned franchises and characters belong to their respective owners.
Why Yang Isn't Allowed To Cook Breakfast Anymore
"You're going to...what?" Weiss scratched her head, blinking at Yang as the team ate with everyone else in the school canteen for dinner.
"I'm going to make you guys breakfast tomorrow!" Yang said, cheering as she lifted a forkful of beef to her mouth.
"And why?" The heiress calmly sipped her lemonade. "How do I know this isn't another stupid antic?"
"Oh, you know," the brawler shrugged. "I just want to do nice things, once in a while. I AM going to be your future big sister, after all." Yang pointed out, winking at her. "I've got to set an example, right?"
Blake raised an eyebrow sceptically at her partner.
"You're telling me you know how to cook?"
"Mhm! I'm the best cook ever!" Yang nodded proudly. "It comes with having to take care of Rubes, what with mom teaching in Mistral and Dad being busy sometimes..."
"You only ever made microwavable baked beans and macaroni cheese..." Ruby pointed out, causing Yang to blush.
"R-Ruby! T-they don't need to know that!"
Weiss scoffed. "Even I can cook better than that."
"Is that a challenge, dear Weiss?" Yang responded with a determined smirk.
"It might be."
"Challenge accepted." Yang gave her a thumbs up and grinned. "I-I'll blow you away with my cooking skills!"
"I think the camping trip was proof enough." Weiss shot back drily.
"You..." Yang clenched her right hand tightly. Weiss merely smirked, savouring the rare moment where she had something on Yang she couldn't retort against.
"Well, if it makes you feel any better, I trust you, sis." Ruby smiled at her sister reassuringly.
"Thank you! Someone has faith in me."
Blake sighed, standing up and adjusting her bow. "Well, I'm going to go sleep in the Lagann tonight. When Yang burns down the dorm, call me. I've been dying to test out how good Norn is at putting fires out."
"Wow, Blake." Yang gave her partner a deadpan look. "I'm so amazed by your support. I might even explode with amazement."
"Leave the sarcasm to Weiss, please~"
"Urgh!" Yang sighed, muttering to herself. "I'll show you all..."
Early next morning...
Yang scanned through the Big Book of Trope Pantheons, looking for an appropriate deity to offer tribute to.
"Let me see...okay, O-Kirby-sama, God of Omnivorism, Gordon Ramsey, God of Perfectionist Cooking..." Yang flipped through the pages, adjusting her reading glasses carefully. "Ah, here! Takeshi Kaga, God of Cuisine!"
Yang looked around shiftily, smirking.
"Now they'll have to believe me!" The brawler cheered. "Let's see how to...oh, COME ON!"
The summoning ritual to invoke the power of said god was crossed out in Sharpie, with a note from Velvet apologising to any future users of the tome.
The brawler frowned and tossed the book aside, before sighing irritably.
"Just my luck..." Slightly dejected, she looked towards the stove in the dorm, rubbing her chin and thinking carefully.
"...maybe I could just make some bacon for them." The brawler nodded. "Yeah, bacon and fried eggs. That can't go wrong, right?"
And so, Yang began to fry her bacon. It went surprisingly well, all things considered.
A few minutes in, Yang studied a clock on the wall closely.
"Huh..." The brawler frowned slightly. "They're probably going to wake up in a couple of minutes...why won't this thing cook already?"
She stared at the sizzling bacon, crossing her arms and tapping her foot impatiently. "Come on, cook already..."
The bacon continued to sizzle, impassive of Yang's pleas to get it to cook faster.
"Ugh, cooking's boring!" Yang complained. "Why won't this thing cook faster..." She slapped the panhandle lightly. "Ugh...
"...okay, that does it!" The brawler snapped, taking out a phial of Dust. "I'm going to put this into overdrive! If I put some Dust onto it...it should cook faster!"
Yang did so, and-
Minutes later...
Ruby awoke to the scent of bacon.
"Urgh...huh?" She looked blearily at Yang frantically attempting to put a fire at the stove out with a blanket. "Yang?"
"...humrugh..." Ruby mumbled quietly to herself before going back to sleep.
"DAMMIT THAT DID NO WORK AS INTENDED" Yang complained, as Blake casually walked in, sighing.
"See, Yang? What did I tell you?"
"S-shut up, Belladonna! Just help me put this thing out!"
"Alright. Norn?" The catgirl whistled for her Persocom, and Norn approached, still in that maid costume of hers, with a large nozzle and pack attached to her back.
"Do not worry, Miss Xiao Long," Norn announced with just a hint of sadistic glee in her flat voice. "I am equipped with adequate equipment that is not at all overly redundant."
Yang stared at her before yelling. "T-that doesn't reas-"
Before she could finish the sentence, she was submerged in extinguisher foam, putting out the fire- and ruining Yang's hair. Norn turned off the flow a little later than she needed to.
"Fire extinguished."
"...now that...is a horrible pun..." Blake simultaneously chuckled and cringed, staring at the quivering mound of foam that was Yang.
Needless to say, after Yang was finally extracted from the mound of foam, Weiss had a good laugh that day, Yang spent the rest of the morning removing foam from her hair and muttering curses about Norn, and team RWBY collectively agreed that Yang was never allowed to cook without the entire team supervising her and in the vicinity of Dust.
The bacon, surprisingly, was edible, if a bit crispier than expected.
How Do I Shot Web?
Elsa Schnee stared at the blank computer monitor with a flat expression, her mouth slightly agape. She was inside RWBY dorm, sitting at Weiss' computer with nary the faintest idea of how to use it.
"Blake," the bookworm quietly called out. "How do I turn this on?"
"Turn what on?" Blake looked around, somewhat confused.
"This." Elsa pointed at the computer. "How does one activate these?"
"...you...errr...don't know how to use these?" Blake stared at her incredulously. Elsa merely looked down slightly, the slightest hint of red filling her cheeks.
"I...have never been taught how to."
Blake chuckled, shaking her head. "It's alright, Elsa. It makes sense, too. All you have to do is press the button on top of the CPU, which is that black cuboid next to the monitor that you were staring at, wait for stuff to show up and use the mouse to control the small arrow that moves around."
Elsa looked curiously at her. "A...mouse?"
"Yeah. You point it at the computer and it makes the cursor move." Blake checked her watch, before frowning.
"Dammit, I'm going to be late for the Antic Order meeting. I'll see you around, okay? Just ask Weiss or Ruby or Yang to help you learn, okay?" The catgirl said as she swung her Team Antic cape behind her and rushed out of the dorm, leaving Elsa alone with the computer.
"...I must search for a mouse." The bookworm stated quietly to herself. "I do not know why a computer requires one of those to function, but if Blake says it does, then I must find one."
With that, she set out to find the first mouse she could, ignoring the white, mouse-like object with a red, blinking light in front of it next to the monitor.
"You want to borrow my mice?" Nora tilted her head at Elsa as she clutched a cage full of squeaking mice.
"Yes." Elsa nodded quickly.
"…..why?"
"I require them for education."
"...if it is that good a cause, then I cannot deny you, fellow crusader!" Nora saluted her, before opening the cage's door and taking out a wriggling white-and-brown mouse.
"Take GOOD care of him! His name is Mr Scampers!"
"Noted." Elsa took Mr Scampers in her hand, petting him carefully and walking out of JNPR dorm. Nora smiled, satisfied.
"Another good deed done for the day!"
Ren looked over at his girlfriend, raising an eyebrow.
"Nora, why are you holding a cage of mice in the first place?"
"Why, my dear Ren," She smiled sweetly at him. "These mice will be useful in my conquest of Beacon for the Great Pancake Order!"
"...what."
"I'm hurt you don't understand me." Nora pouted, crossing her arms after putting the cage down. "Don't you see, the school is DESTINED to be united under the Pancake God!"
Meanwhile, in RWBY dorm...
Elsa lightly gripped Mr Scampers around the sides, staring at the blank screen, then at the CPU underneath.
"This should work." Elsa pressed the button on top of the unit, turning the computer on- apparently, it was a SchneeOS computer, judging by the start-up screen.
Shortly after the SchneeOS screen disappeared, a blue screen with three icons on it, each having Weiss, Ruby and Blake's names underneath them respectively, flashed onto screen. A white, arrow-like icon was on the screen as well, floating above the snowflake symbol for Weiss.
Elsa blinked briefly, before pointing Mr Scampers at the screen, slowly arcing him around in a circle to see if that moved the cursor. The mouse squeaked loudly and repeatedly, unused to the weird motion.
"...why is the icon not moving?" Elsa looked blankly at the computer. "Is the computer defective?"
"What is all that squeaking for?" Ruby complained as she walked in, popping a cookie into her mouth as she did, before looking over at Elsa.
"Hey, Elsa...wait, what are you doing?"
"I am attempting to use a computer." The bookworm said without irony.
"And...why are you pointing a mouse at the screen?"
"Blake said you had to point a mouse at the screen to make the cursor move."
The crimsonette giggled, shaking her head and moving over to Elsa, managing to pull Mr Scampers safely out of her grasp.
"Elsa...that's not the kind of mouse you use to use a computer." Ruby lifted the white computer mouse from behind the monitor. "This is."
"Oh." The bookworm put down the mouse, who gladly sprinted to freedom through the open door, back to his mistress. "I see."
"...do you honestly not know how to use a computer?"
"I-I was attempting to teach myself." The bookworm said with just a hint of embarrassment.
Ruby chuckled. "That is so cuuuute! Tell you what, I'll teach you, okay?"
"You will?"
"No problem." The reaper smiled. "That's what I'm here for, after all."
"Well, then I have a question." The bookworm raised her finger. "Is a keyboard-"
"It is not made out of keycards or house keys."
"...understood."
Sir Lyserg and Vivi's Wonderful Adventure!
Vivi jumped onto the gentlemanly dinosaur's back.
"Pipipipi!"
"...what, milady?"
"Pi..." The plushie patted her stubby left arm on her right, as if to clarify her words. "Pipipipi."
"...I...don't see why you would want to-"
"Pipipipipi..." Vivi sighed, shaking her head. "Pipipipipipi...pipipipi!"
"Are you saying Lady Scarlatina's life is in danger unless you can acquire something from Vale!?" Sir Lyserg adjusted his monocle, still not quite adjusted to what was going on here, but clearly shocked.
Vivi nodded hurriedly. "Pi pi!"
"...I cannot stand idly by while a dear friend is likely to die!" He pointed a talon-tipped claw to the sky. "Very well, tally-ho!"
With that, Sir Lyserg began to scamper off out of the window and into the Beacon grounds, with Vivi hanging on for dear life.
"Piiiiiii!"
"Onwards! We ride in defence of a dear friend!" Sir Lyserg declared as he leapt out of Beacon's front gate.
Ozpin casually studied the scene, sipping a cup of coffee.
"...hm." He shrugged. "Glynda, does that look suspicious to you?"
The instructor was merely staring at the spectacle, shocked.
"W-what kind of antic..."
...
Eventually, after leaping onto various cars and trucks to skip traffic, Vivi and Sir Lyserg arrived in Vale Shopping Center.
"Pipipipi!" Vivi pointed towards the nearest sweet shop.
"I had assumed Lady Scarlatina required medicine, Lady Vivi." The RWBYSaurus looked confusedly at the plushie on his back.
"Pipipi pi pipipi pi."
"You say the medicine she requires is here?"
"Pipipi." Vivi shrugged. "Pi, pi pi pi pii."
"Very well...I shall take you at your word!" Sir Lyserg reared up and leapt through the crowd.
The crowd stared at the dinosaur and plushie running through the crowd, stepping back as Lyserg ran through.
"Oh Oum!"
"Is that a dinosaur?!"
"Mommy, mommy, it's Grimmasic Park!"
"The hell is a dinosaur doing here?!"
"Pipipipi..." Vivi pointed dead ahead.
"What do you mea-" Lyserg's monocled eye widened as he saw a pane of glass being lifted in front of him.
"Very well, excelsior!"
With a roar, he somersaulted through the air over the pane and landed perfectly on the other side, before continuing his run towards the sweet store.
Finally, after several minutes, they arrived, and Vivi dismounted, staring at him.
"Pipipipi, pipi pipipi piiiiii pipipi. Pi?"
"Understood, Lady Vivi." Sir Lyserg nodded quickly.
"Pi!" Vivi gave him a thumbs up and walked in.
Minutes later, Vivi ran outside frantically, carrying a bag of unidentified objects before climbing onto Sir Lyserg's back.
"Pipipipipi!"
"W-what? What do you mean by that-"
"Pipipi!" Vivi squeaked as the angry looking shopkeeper began walking out after her.
"...alright, Lady Vivi!" Sir Lyserg reared up and began running.
"Come back here! Hey!" The shopkeeper roared after them, before whipping out a phone.
"Lady Vivi, please do not tell me you stole the medicine."
"Pipipipi!"
"...I am sadly bound by my oath of chivalry to help you still..." The dinosaur sighed just before police robots- Atlesian Knight models- appeared.
"STOP." One robot placed itself between Lyserg and the exit. "YOU ARE VIOLATING THE LAW."
"Pi pi PI!" Vivi pulled Lyserg's neck up and the pair leapt out of the shopping center and to freedom using the robot's head as a springboard.
"Lady Vivi, I believe it would be wise to-"
"Pi pi pi pi."
"...well, that was rude of you."
Vivi steered them towards an empty police bike, before climbing off and pointing at the backseat.
The dinosaur stared at her incredulously. "Surely you're not serious."
"Pi pipi pipi."
"..." Lyserg looked behind him as the Atlesian Knights closed in. Sighing, he climbed on the back of the bike, clinging on to the seat with his claws.
"Very well, Lady Vivi, I entrust you with my life."
"Pipipipi!" The plushie then climbed to the ignition of the bike, before peeling the panel off and fiddling with the wires in the ignition. Before long, the engines roared into life, as Vivi cheered happily.
"PIPIPIPIPI!" She clambered onto the front seat, before whipping out two long clamping claws and attaching them to the handlebars, revving the motorcycle up and driving away.
"PIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!"
"I-I think I might be nauseous..." Sir Lyserg, ever the dignified gentleman, placed a claw to his mouth.
"STOP. YOU HAVE VIOLATED THE LAW." The robots called after them as they gave chase, but Vivi was too far away.
She rode onto the nearest highway out of Vale and back to Beacon, cheering all the way.
Fifteen minutes later...
Vivi finally drove the motorcycle into Beacon, sidling up to the main entrance into the main building where Velvet was waiting impatiently.
Lyserg adjusted his monocle blearily.
"That was...unsavoury..." The dinosaur muttered.
Vivi turned off the ignition by moving the wires with her clamping claws, before jumping off with the bag.
"D-did you get it?" Velvet eagerly asked.
"Pipipi!" Vivi nodded happily, opening the bag and revealing a load of Weiss-branded sweets. "Piii!"
Sir Lyserg merely stared dumbfounded at the bounty they'd risked arrest for.
"You're the best, Vivi-chan!" Velvet hugged her plushie tightly.
"Pipipi..." Vivi nuzzled her partner's cheek. "I...wuuuv you..."
"Awww...you can talk, too?!"
"Pi!"
"...okaaay, maybe not yet, but still!"
Lyserg sighed, walking off slowly and fixing his top hat and monocle.
"One fears that one might need a cup of tea after that stressful fiasco."
Reactsverse Profiles #1
Of course, information on some of the characters who fill the world of Weiss Reacts who aren't from other series, hm? Just in case you were curious.
#1
Full Name: Siegfried Pieter Schnee
Title: Patriarch of the Schnee Family, CEO of Schnee Dust Company
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Description: His hair is straight, short and pale white, like his daughter's. His eyes are a piercing grey behind small spectacles. His physique is incredibly muscular and bulky, yet the man is capable of extreme bursts of speed, should he need to be. Has a preference for fine black suits. His personality is fairly open, kind and accepting, especially towards his beloved daughter Weiss. However, he loathes his father Siegmund Schnee.
Weapon: Balmung, often referred to as The Dragonslayer, a Ballistic Multiform Sword Variant type. A massive, single-edged blade, with a black segment at the blunt end and a large, rubber-bound grip with a stylized dragon's mouth as a hilt. Other forms include a massive cannon and a 'propeller' form used to carry Siegfried along akin to a windsurfing boat.
Semblance: Nullification: Siegfried is capable of negating most Semblances via contact with his Aura. Immense training has allowed him to hone his Aura into a blade around Balmung to effectively make use of his Semblance.
#2
Full Name: Vivi
Age: 6 months
Gender: Female
Description: She resembles Weiss Schnee in appearance and clothing, only being a plushie version of her- her hair is a darker shade of blue than the real Weiss, and her clothing is brighter. Her personality is somewhat kind, if fairly sarcastic and incredibly mischievous, fitting her original purpose as a servant to Velvet.
Weapon: Slugger, Mallet Variant. A large, wooden mallet. It appears to be impervious to destruction by any means.
Semblance: CLASSIFIED
#3
Full Name: Elsa Schnee
Age: 19
Gender: Female
Description: Her hair is straight, somewhat long and pale white, though dyed purple. Her eyes are a sharp blue behind large-rimmed spectacles. Her physique resembles Weiss', for the most part, although her chest is larger, giving the latter no end to envy. Her personality is characterised as quiet and introverted, with a love of books- however, she will fiercely defend her friends and adopted family if need be.
Weapon: Kaltblume, a Multi Action Dust Rapier- Wakizashi Variant type. Similarly to Myrtenaster, the weapon uses Dust as ammunition, firing out of a barrel underneath the blade. The sword's blade itself is shorter than Myrtenaster, but wider and with a single edge, allowing for a quick draw for Elsa to launch into her various sword techniques. The grip is also similar to a pistol grip, to allow for quicker draws.
Semblance: Ice Manipulation: Elsa, unlike Weiss, does not require the use of Dust to create and manipulate ice, the ability being native to her. As such, she is capable of finer manipulation of ice, forming extensions to Kaltblume or shields with it.
END
A/N: So three one-shots and a bunch of character profiles! Not bad, not bad at all.
Next chapter, Weiss Reacts to The Layman's Yangilocks and the Three Fauna! Yep! A huge shout-out to The Layman for allowing us to react to it in the first place- if you're reading this, you're awesome and you should feel awesome!
So, I hope you enjoyed that, leave your ideas, comments, thoughts, criticisms, reviews and suggestions and I hope you have a GREAT day! Until next time!