20. It's time for one of his talks with Celty, and the dullahan is more than happy to meet him at South Ikebukuro Park. He's still uneasy about the stabbing incident a few weeks ago, but Mai hasn't brought it up since, so he's not sure why it's still bothering him. If Mai says she's all right, then it should be over and done with, not stuck in his head like a stubborn splinter. Normally, he lets it go, but his guilt isn't leaving him alone this time.
But he wants it to, before it starts to interfere with his and Mai's friendship. She's become an important person to him, as important as Celty and Miyoshi. And Kasuka. Mai is a remarkable friend: shy, patient, caring, sweet, fun, easy to talk to. It truly doesn't matter to him if she's involved with the damn flea and the idea of hurting her, or any of his close friends and family, is unthinkable. Except he knows he can't hurt Celty, not seriously. He's felt bad about the time he accidentally hurt Miyoshi, but he's never felt the crushing guilt he does now. It's like….if he were to hurt Kasuka-seriously hurt him-then this is how it would feel. This empty, hollow feeling.
Celty arrives, approaching slowly as though sensing his mood, and she gently asks what's wrong.
He explains, and it takes almost a quarter hour to completely describe the swirling, angry, and frantic thoughts in his head. The Transporter listens without a word, as usual. His fists clench, his teeth grit, he relaxes, takes a drag on his cigarette, looks up at the grey sky as snow begins to fall, he swears, crushes a hand into his eye, and says in a hoarse voice, "I don't know why I just-"
Celty holds up her PDA. You love her.
-0-0-0-
Author's Notes:
Ghost Hunt is owned by Fuyumi Ono and Shiho Inada.
Durarara! is owned by Ryohgo Narita, Suzuhito Yasuda, and Akiyo Satorigi.