4.4.1
Quinn walks into the airport and stops for a moment, already gripped by the past. Remembers Carrie walking out the doors, wanting to hug her and hate her at the same time.
And now he's firmly on the side of hate yet he's still there at her bidding, keeps telling himself he's not anxious to see her.
He tries to shake the thought out of his head but is already pissed off, irritated by the time he gets in a cab. And it doesn't help that the cab driver gives him a suspicious look as Quinn gets in the taxi. He wonders if it's just paranoia that makes him think the driver recognized him, then asks to get out of the cab miles away from his actual target location.
Walking through the busy streets of Islamabad isn't any better - he feels conspicuous and naked, his emotions completely on edge. But Quinn forces himself along, reminds himself this is the choice he made. Even if she pressured him into it, he was still there against his better judgement. And that was on him.
So he tries to push through the past, think about the present. He's here because she needs him, because he can't let go. And there's no point to being there if his mind is elsewhere, if he's full of regret.
#
Quinn walks up to the side op, having gone through every evasive maneuver a few times along the way. Sure that no one's followed him, he steels himself and knocks on the door.
"Hey Quinn," Fara says, opening the door.
"Hey Fara," he replies, trying to sound casual. Does not want to reveal how tense he is, that he's filled to the brim with nervous anticipation.
"You're early," she says, sounds a bit nervous herself.
"Tailwinds," he mutters, relieved to have beaten Carrie there, to have a bit of time to assess the situation before having to face her.
As if reading his mind, Fara tells him that Carrie's not there yet then offers him some coffee. Quinn says yes to caffeine by habit, follows Fara deeper into the office and finds a free space to drop his stuff, set up shop.
"So, catch me up," he says. "Did Carrie identify the guy with the earpiece?"
"She did," Fara replies. "She's with Saul now, laying out the operation."
Quinn knows the basics of the plan, wonders if anything's changed during his time on the plane.
"So Saul rattles a general's cage or two and we wait to see who delivers the message to our foot soldier," he states.
Fara doesn't contradict him, tells him the name of the foot soldier - Farhad Ghazi.
And this is exactly the information he needs to be filled in on. Yet it's not what he wants to know, not what he's been thinking about his entire trip over.
For a moment Quinn debates in his head whether to show his hand, if it's a fair tradeoff for the information he desires. But even then he knows what the outcome will be, that he has to know.
"How is she?" he asks, as easily as he can.
"Carrie?" Fara asks, as if he could be talking about anyone else.
"Good, amazing actually."
Quinn wonders what Fara means, tries to read in between the lines. Looks around the office and notes that everything has been done to perfection, that it all seems ready to go even though Carrie's been back for only a couple days.
"Well you got this place up and running in record time," he comments, impressed by the attention to detail, especially considering the time lines.
"All her," Fara replies. "Honestly, I don't know when she finds the time to sleep."
Quinn pauses, looks over at her for a moment. Tells himself to settle down, that it's nothing to be concerned about. Yet at the same time he can feel his guts start to roil and he remembers exactly how it is whenever Carrie's around in his life.
He can't help but care. And he hates himself for it, would burn it out of himself if he knew how.
Yet there he stands, wondering if she's alright, if she's working herself to the edge, if she's losing herself to the disease again. And all the while he keeps thinking he both should and shouldn't give a shit, tells himself he's losing it already and he hasn't even seen her yet.
Thankfully Max shows up just then to say that the medical student is there and Fara has to slip into her new role, try and hold onto this possible asset. She looks nervous but responds right away, goes out to talk to the boy.
Quinn steps out of his new office space, watches her hurry into the front of the office to deal with the situation. He notices Max looks more concerned than he should be, wonders what's up with the quiet techie.
But Quinn has enough on his mind, doesn't even bother to say hey to Max. Just walks by, preparing himself for the hurricane that is about to reenter his life.
######
Carrie strides into the office, asks brusquely where the boy is. Readies herself for the conversation to come, knows this is her chance to firmly land a huge asset.
On her way through to Fara's 'office' she glances over and sees Quinn sitting in another room, meets his gaze as he looks over at her.
And it's at once comforting and disturbing to have him back, to feel his eyes on her. But thankfully she has Aayan to deal with, can put off the encounter with Quinn until after she's dealt with the boy.
So she just gives Quinn a look and a half-smile as she readies herself to make the play, reel the asset in.
Carrie opens the door, can see that Aayan is taut with nervous energy. He asks right away if she really can get him out of Pakistan, then tells her he needs eighty thousand rupees but can't tell her why.
Which is the perfect scenario for her, an easy way to earn his trust. But of course she starts by balking at his request for money, waits to see how desperate he is, what she can use against him.
The boy is jumpy, tries to leave when she doesn't give him the money right away. And Carrie knows this is time to play out her hand, take things to the next level.
So she shows Aayan the picture of Farhad Ghazi, has a hunch that the ISI operative is at least part of the reason the boy is so nervous.
Just as she thought, Carrie gets a reaction right away, sees that Aayan's listening again. So she keeps up the pressure, tells him that he's in a lot of trouble, that the Ghazi works for state security.
The kid immediately looks terrified, starts to break down and sniffle. Which is exactly what she wants, gives her something to work with.
Carrie puts down her bag, comes up close to the boy. Rubs his back soothingly, puts her arms around him.
He's shaking, obviously trying to keep back the tears as she holds him close, pulls him in. Finally he stops crying and she lets go of him, all the while thinking how this is was an ideal set up, the easiest way to lure him in, exploit his weakness, gain his trust.
She sits him down, tells him that he needs to tell her what's going on. Asks him if the money is for Ghazi, if he's being blackmailed. But Aayan just says that the money is for something else, but he can't say for what. Just that he thinks it will solve the problem.
Which is enough for Carrie, a gift, in fact. Once she gives him the money he will owe her, will feel both an obligation to her as well as a need for what she has to offer. So she leads him into the other office, asks Fara for eighty thousand rupees out of petty cash.
She makes one last play, tells Aayan she wants to send someone with him, to make sure he's alright. Like she isn't going to have someone follow him the moment he's out the door.
But he is insistent that he has to do it alone and that starts the gears turning in her head once again, wondering what could be going on, what he's hiding from her.
Carrie hands him the money, tells him that he needs to get back to the office as soon as possible if he wants to get out of Pakistan. The boy nods, clearly still extremely tense and scared. But he says okay and she knows he's hooked, that now he has no one to turn to but her. Which is exactly how it was supposed to play out, tells her she's still on her game.
######
Quinn walks out into the main office area, readies himself for what's to come.
He can't quite define the emotions he's feeling at the moment, the ones sparked by Carrie's play, her use of the boy. Watching her reel him in, pull him in close both literally and figuratively, had bothered Quinn more than he thought it would. He tells himself it's how Carrie operates, that he's seen it before. But to do it to a naive college student, a boy barely out of his teens.
Everything about the situation makes Quinn uncomfortable, on edge. Watching Carrie hold the kid in her arms while petting him in fake sympathy already has him feeling morally corrupt, irritated that he came back to see it all happen.
Then again, if he's being honest with himself, Quinn knows it's also exactly why he came back. Because someone needs to be there to watch out for her, to try and keep her in line. He's just not sure how the duty has fallen to him, or what makes him think he will have any success at all.
Carrie turns as he opens the door and a flood of emotion runs through him in response to being in close proximity to her yet again. He looks at her and can't help but question everything about her, ask himself if she has any morality at all, if she's even worth saving.
"Why are you looking at me like that?" she asks, already defensive.
Because I'm trying to keep my chest from imploding, he thinks to himself. Because I'm not sure how either one of us can keep doing this.
"Fara filled me in on the kid," he says tersely.
"And?" Carrie asks, as if she doesn't know exactly what he means.
"Getting anybody asylum these days is no easy matter. Much less a place at medical college in London," he points out.
"Yeah, I'm aware of that, Quinn," she fires back, turning away from him.
"So?" Quinn asks. "You have another play?"
And all he can do is wonder what the hell she is thinking, promising shit she can't make good on, playing a kid whose life they've already destroyed. He hopes to hell she's not just going to use the boy and then leave him for dead, to join the rest of his family. But he has no idea what to do about her anymore, is having a hard time just watching it all happen.
"He's an iron in the fire," Carrie replies confidently. "He knows something he's not saying. Our man with the earpiece paid him a visit last week."
Quinn doesn't even have time to be annoyed that she somehow always has that one thing no one else knows. Quickly he puts that info into his mental map of the situation and realizes that it's significant, that she's found an essential connection.
"He did?" Quinn asks, his attention piqued.
Of course Carrie comes back with a smug look, a bit of a smirk.
"Anything else you want to know?" she asks with that certain tone in her voice.
But Quinn's told himself he isn't going to start anything with her and this time she's clearly onto something. So he bites back a snippy remark, reminds himself that this is what it's always like with her and just turns around, gets his things.
######
"Getting anybody asylum these days is no easy matter. Much less a place at medical college in London," Quinn says, his judgement already clear in his tone.
For fuck sakes, Carrie thinks to herself. That's what she gets for letting naive Fara fill Quinn in on the situation.
"Yeah, I'm aware of that, Quinn," she says sarcastically. Remembers back to when he first showed up and annoyed the hell out of her. Thinks that was about a lifetime ago now. Definitely not just two years.
He had fought her all along really, was always trying to tell her what to do. Which somehow both irritating and comforting at the same time.
But of course she knows something he doesn't know, that their ISI guy has been to see this boy, that this kid might be the key to finding out why Sandy was killed.
"So, do you have another play?" he asks.
And Carrie thinks he should know her better than that by now, that she always has another play. And this time she's playing him, trying to put him back on her side.
"He's an iron in the fire," she says, totally sure of herself now. "He knows something he's not saying. Our man with the earpiece paid him a visit last week."
"He did?" Quinn asks, sounds suddenly interested.
More importantly, he's no longer questioning her methods, Carrie thinks to herself.
"Anything else you want to know?" she asks snidely, almost daring him to snap back at her.
But Quinn just turns, says he's getting his stuff.
And Carrie smiles a bit, knows she's at least won round one. Waits for him to get his things, then leads them out to the street, into a cab.
She gives directions to the cab driver, then tries to avoid looking at Quinn, who's clearly doing some avoiding of his own, staring out his window, his body taut.
After nine silent minutes and now stuck in Islamabad traffic, she finally turns and looks at him, is almost concerned.
Quinn's a bit pale, obviously tense. And Carrie doesn't know if she should say something, doesn't usually have the time to be worried about anything but herself, what she needs.
"Are you alright, Quinn?" she finally asks, says it quickly, with an irritated tone.
He doesn't reply but does turn to look at her, wears an unreadable expression. Looks a bit like a trapped animal - cautious, on edge.
"I don't know," he finally mutters as he looks away.
Carrie watches him for awhile, is thankful he's there yet slightly uncomfortable with his presence. It's the way he looks at her, like he's seeing right through her schemes, judging her right in her core.
It makes her wonder what he sees there; makes her nervous because she's not ready to look there herself.
"Well, thanks for coming. I really needed someone on my side," she says.
And again he doesn't answer, just gives her a look that makes her wonder if he's really on her side at all.