CHAPTER FIFTEEN

'Lucius,' she began hesitantly, 'I've never done this before.'

'We'll learn together. I think we've shown we do that well.'

His whispered words helped relax her enough to turn in his arms and fully accept what was going to happen between them. Despite who he was, who she was, and what they both stood for, she knew that if she didn't allow herself to have this, she would regret it for the rest of her life. Every corner of her mind was imploring her to see reason and cease the madness she was surely about to get into. Her heart, though… Her heart knew that she loved this man for everything he was. For all his faults, all his imperfections…

His face was set in firm determination, but his eyes spoke promises of all the pleasures they would share. Hermione reached a hand up and trailed the backs of her fingers over his cheek before bringing her other hand up to cup his cheeks between her palms. A quick glance at his mouth had her licking her lips and rising up on tiptoes to kiss him. Her kiss was soft and exploratory, but she felt something from him that surprised her: uncertainty. That was when his words truly came into focus.

'"We'll learn together." Lucius?' she asked. 'Have you…? I mean, are you…?'

'I've not wanted to engage anyone before.'

Against her better judgment, Hermione laughed.

'You're incorrigible. You've seen the women who attempt to throw themselves at me. The slags of Hogwarts. They're like the brooms in First Year Flying lessons: everyone's had a ride. My father, of course, simultaneously lauds and chastises me for not having a go. While he agrees that a Malfoy should never lower themselves to be with a woman with such low moral standing, he has long felt that I need to be "properly broken in" before I get married. You're actually doing me a service, my love,' he added jokingly. 'Father told me that if I returned home after Sixth Year still untouched then he would send me out for a week over the summer to be educated.'

Her lips twitched up into a slight teasing smile. 'Well, I suppose I could just let some random woman have her way with you.'

They shared a brief moment of levity before the cool confidence that would come to define Lucius Malfoy came to the fore. He leaned down and kissed her briefly before taking her hand and leading her away from the dorms and down the hall toward the study rooms. He led her past the doors she knew belonged to the private study libraries for fifth and seventh year students. They walked a couple meters farther down the hall and came to a series of three doors that made up the end of the hall.

'These rooms are… Well, for just such an occasion as this.' Lucius smiled down at her and opened the door on the left to reveal a surprisingly Spartan bedroom. There was a four-poster bed, a plain wooden table with two armless chairs, and a rather plush-looking rug in front of a fireplace. The only thing that seemed out of place was what appeared to be a medicine cabinet mounted to the far wall. 'This is the most basic of the rooms. The door across from here contains more…surfaces, if you will. It's also equipped for those with voyeuristic tendencies. The door in the middle is a dungeon.'

Hermione looked at him blankly for a moment before telling him she didn't want to know. Her mind was mulling over why anyone would want to visit a dungeon and she vowed to look it up later, even though she was certain that she really did not want to know. Turning her full attention back to the man in front of her, she took a deep breath and closed the distance between them. They kissed again and this time, Lucius was in full control. He gripped her head in his hands and held her to him as he sensuously used his lips and tongue to turn her to putty in his hands.

She broke the kiss and pulled away from him. Smiling saucily in his direction, she turned her back to him and sauntered to the bed. Hermione bent at the waist and pulled off her sleep pants, leaving her only clad in the button-down cotton top and her knickers. Turning back around, she expected him to have followed her across the room or, at the very least, to be standing stock still and staring at her. She did not expect him to have his back to her as he rooted around in the wall mounted cabinet.

'What are you doing?' she asked, padding across the room to him.

'Looking for…Ah! There it is!' Apparently he'd located the potion he was searching for, because he turned around to show her a vial of a sickly brown liquid. Popping the cork, Lucius downed the contents before discarding the empty vial and placing a tally mark next to the words "Contraceptive Potion" on the sheet inside the cabinet.

Hermione was confused. 'Wasn't I supposed to drink that?'

'No. The potion is designed to stop semen and while it works when ingested by women, it's more effective when taken by the man.' Then he pulled her close and lowered his voice. 'Make no mistake, I'll still come deep inside of you, but there's no fear of a child born out of wedlock. Every child of ours will be legitimate.'

She wanted to protest, to tell him that there would never be a child shared between them, but before the words could escape her mouth, his lips were on hers. All thoughts of a future together were banished by the realness of his body pressing against her. This was now. This was happening. This was real. She could no longer deny herself the longing she'd felt toward this man. She knew deep down that she should fight against what was happening…

'You're thinking too much, love. Just feel.'

His lips found a place just below her jaw near her ear that effectively erased all thought from her mind, save for those that focused on what he was doing to her. She threaded her hands in his hair and held him to her as his hands traversed the length of her back down to her bottom. Pulling back from her, he asked what happened to her pants.

'Well, that's what you get for not paying me the proper attention,' she joked. When he looked confused, she continued, 'I took them off while you were searching for the contraceptive potion. We must have had our backs to each other.'

'That's a shame. I'll have to be more attentive from now on. Wouldn't want to miss anything else.'

He backed her up toward the bed and when her knees hit the mattress, she sat down. Standing before her, he reached his hands to the hem of his shirt and pulled it off. Hermione stared at the perfect porcelain of his chest and stomach, tracing with her eyes a line of fine hairs that ran from his belly button down under his sleep pants. With her eyes glued to the place where the hair disappeared, she watched entranced as Lucius then moved his hands to his hips and, in one swift move, removed his bottoms completely.

Hermione licked her lips while her insides quivered in fear. Looking upon his hardened appendage, she wondered how on earth it was going to fit inside of her. Logistically, she knew that he would, that her body was designed to adjust and accept him. However…

'You're thinking too much again.' Lucius was smiling at her. 'We'll figure it out together.'

'Together.'

She took his hand and pulled him forward onto the bed. Laying down onto her back, she positioned herself so that she was partially underneath him but still able to get away if she wanted to. Lucius positioned himself next to her, propping his body up on his right elbow. His left hand moved to the top button on her shirt and fussed with it for a rather awkward few seconds before they both laughed. Lucius got up, walked around the bed, and settled himself onto his left elbow.

'This should work a little better,' he joked.

'I can help, you know. It is my shirt.'

He shook his head. 'You denied me the right to remove your pants. I want to undress you the rest of the way.'

She smiled at him and watched enraptured as he made quick work of her shirt. Once the buttons were undone, he rolled to his left and kissed her softly as his right hand came up to play with her breasts. Her breathing became more labored as he teased and tweaked her nipples. She was panting into his mouth while he kissed her. His lips then left hers as his right hand began to trace a path down her stomach toward her knickers. The moment when his lips attached to her right nipple, his fingers brushed her swollen and rather damp center. She gasped, feeling a pulse of need deep inside of her.

'Lucius…'

'My love…'

'I want you.'

'I know. But you're not ready yet. I don't… I don't want to hurt you.'

'There are some things you can't help.'

He stared into her eyes, allowing her to see the intensity and sincerity of his words. 'I can help this. I can promise that I will always be there for you. I will always look out for you.' She tried to interrupt him, but he forged on. 'No harm will ever come to you so long as I'm living.'

A tear slid down her cheek. 'You really shouldn't make promises you can't keep.'

'As long as I'm around, you will be safe. I love you, Hermione. What sort of man would I be if I couldn't keep my love from danger?' His fingers brushed her sodden core again. 'I love you too much to see you come to harm.'

Hermione reached toward him and pulled his head to her, knowing that these words would not ring true in her near future. She brought her mouth to his and kissed him deeply for only a moment before he pulled away. Getting to his knees, he moved his hands to her hips and oh so slowly removed her knickers. Sitting back on his heels, he tossed the garment onto the floor and looked at her, spread out before him on the bed, naked and waiting.

'You're so beautiful…'

'Lucius…"

He moved over her as she opened her legs for him. She could tell he was holding himself back simply by looking in his eyes, so she was surprised when he simply leaned down to kiss her. Placing most of his weight on his left arm, he brought his right hand down to play between her folds, hoping to bring her some pleasure before the pain he knew would be coming. She could feel the coiling tension inside of her, but wanted to be one with him. She'd never wanted anything so badly in her entire life. The way he was playing her body made it difficult for her to tell him in words, so she used her breathy moans and her actions to invite him in, to let him know that she was ready for him. At that moment, his thumb found her clit as he pushed two fingers deep inside of her.

The orgasm came upon her so fast that she screamed out in surprise. His fingers coaxed her for only a few more seconds before he removed them and positioned himself at her entrance. He waited for her to open her eyes and look at him. His eyes were questioning, waiting for her approval, and when she smiled and nodded, it was all the invitation he needed. In one swift move, he pushed inside of her, moving past her body's natural resistance, and seated himself fully. Hermione's eyes squeezed shut at the intrusion as her arms grasped at his shoulders to combat the rather sharp pinch she felt inside.

'I've hurt you,' he said as he attempted to withdraw. 'I'm so sorry…'

'No!' she cried. 'Wait. It'll pass. Just…. Just give me a moment…'

They waited together, Hermione breathing through the discomfort and Lucius holding back against the firm grasp her body had on his, while she adjusted to him. After a moment, she moved her hips a bit and explored the new sensations. He took his cues from her and began thrusting lightly. Their coupling wasn't pretty, it wasn't some aerobic masterpiece, but it was heartfelt and meaningful. He grew more confident as he realized that the pain from his initial intrusion had begun to give way to pleasure, he increased the drag and pull of himself inside of her. Lucius would withdraw more on each move of his hips and push farther inside with every thrust. He was becoming lost to the sensations.

Hermione watched in awe as this beautiful man let himself go with her. She could see his determination to make this good for her, to make it unforgettable. They moved against each other for a long while, alternating between staring into each other's eyes and kissing like there was no need to ever breathe again. He tried changing the depth of his movements, the angle of his thrusts, and his speed in order to see what brought the best reactions from her, but all too soon, he knew it was almost over. Apologizing between deep grunts, he pushed himself as deep as he could go and held himself there as his own orgasm overtook him. Hermione held him in her arms as he came down from his high. A few long moments later, he pulled out of her and fell to the side. There they lay until he could speak again.

'I'm so sorry,' he whispered.

'For what? That was incredible!' came her astonished reply.

He looked at her, confused. 'You didn't orgasm when I did. I should have paid more attention to your needs.'

Hermione laughed. 'Oh, my love. You gave me two orgasms already.'

'Two?'

'Yeah. Don't you remember? One a few weeks ago in the Room of Requirement and one just before you took my virginity.' She paused for a second. 'Or was it a few months ago? I can't remember when, but it's about time you got to enjoy one yourself.'

They stared into each others eyes for long minutes, content to simply lay there and enjoy being with one another. After a while, Hermione leaned into him and kissed him softly on the lips, then his cheek, then the soft place where his jaw ended below his ear. By the time she made it back to his mouth, the intensity and desire was blazing in his eyes again. He took her face in his and kissed her with every ounce of his being.

She was on fire in his arms, desperate to be one with him again, to be with him forever, but knowing it wasn't possible. She had to leave, couldn't stay, but she'd promised to give him this one night. Rolling herself beneath him once again, she allowed him to take her. They kissed and groped, fondled and caressed, made love slowly, and when Lucius brought her to orgasm, just moments before he himself came, she whispered her love for him with tears in her eyes.

Some time later, Hermione roused from her place in his arms and carefully removed herself from the cocoon of his warmth. Getting dressed, she made certain that he was still asleep. The last thing she wanted was for him to wake and ask what she was doing. This was goodbye. She didn't need him witnessing it. When she was dressed, she leaned slightly over him to kiss his perfect brow. He stirred slightly, but didn't wake. Releasing a breath she didn't realize she'd been holding, Hermione padded softly to the door and turned to face him one last time as a friend and lover. Tears began falling anew as she cast cleansing charms on both of them and followed with a few freshening charms to clear the air and sheets of the smell of sex. He would severely dislike not having the scent of her around him when he woke up, but what did it matter? He would hate her soon enough. It was a certainty. Where she was going…

She forbade herself from succumbing to the sob which was building up inside of her, knowing it would do nothing but give her a headache to go along with the ache in her chest. Hermione walked to the Headmaster's office with quick and purposeful strides. She didn't wish for anyone to see her sneaking about, so she utilized every secret passage she could remember in order to get to her destination. When she arrived, she didn't even need to say anything. Professor Dumbledore took her by the hand and flooed to the Ministry, directly into the Department of Mysteries. The Unspeakables gave her a few surprisingly simple instructions before asking if she had any questions. She merely shook her head.

'Miss Granger,' came the soft tones of her professor, 'it really has been a privilege to know you. Perhaps I'll be lucky enough to make your acquaintance later on in my life?'

She didn't answer him, merely smiled before she offered a small wave and initiated the unorthodox magic that would drop her right back into a battle she wished to have no part of. A battle against the Death Eaters.

A battle against her one true love…