As soon as the video lost its connection, the team lost all of its carefully constructed composure. They seemed to each be falling apart in their own ways as they processed what they had just witnessed. Hotch was impressed and thankful to all of them for keeping it together until the feed ended, but now it was clear that they were all deeply affected by what they had just seen. Hotch could see unshed eyes and a look of shock in the face of more than one of this teammates.
Hotch addressed the room, using a gentle tone of voice. "I want everyone to take 10 minutes and get your thoughts together before we get back to working this case," he announced.
JJ nodded and headed for the door, thankful for the opportunity to escape to her office and shed a few tears in privacy. She was stopped before she hit the door though, by Morgan's voice.
"Did you not just see the same video I did? How can we take a break, knowing the state Reid is in? What if those 10 minutes are the 10 minutes we're too late to save him?" There was such anger radiating from Morgan's voice and body language, but Hotch knew better than to take it personally.
Hotch replied. "We all need a minute to process what we just saw. If we let our emotions compromise the investigation, we will lose far more than 10 minutes," Hotch reasoned. He still spoke gently, but there was a firmness to his voice. The look he gave Morgan expressed that this was the end of the discussion.
JJ was first out of the conference room, and she wasted no time in getting to her office. She closed and locked the door behind her, checking to ensure the blinds were already shut. She leaned her back against the door and let go of a long, ragged breath. Her breathing hitched on her next breath in and she let out the sob she had been holding in. A tear dropped from each eye, which she wiped away with her sleeves. Eyes staring at nothing, JJ slowly slid to the floor and sat there with her knees drawn to her chest, silently crying now.
Reid's going to be okay. He's going to make it, one half of her brain told her. Focus on that. Stay positive.
But the other half of her brain chimed in. He must be so scared. He's afraid of the dark and now he's all alone and blindfolded. What if we don't find him in time? What if we do, but the Spence we find isn't the same person? JJ let out another sob at this thought. Spence wasn't allowed to let this change him. He was too special of a person.
JJ spend five minutes on the floor like this before she stood and walked to her desk. She grabbed a tissue and began cleaning herself up. Looking in a hand mirror from her purse, she tightened her ponytail and wiped her eyes one last time.
Time to go get Reid back, JJ thought determinedly as she headed back to the conference room. Time to go catch this bastard.
Morgan stormed out of the conference room and made a beeline to the elevator. If he was being forced to take a few minutes out, he knew what he could do with that time. Exiting the elevator on a different floor, he looked around the FBI's gym. Being the middle of the night, it was completely deserted.
Morgan marched up to the punching bag hanging from the ceiling, and wasted no time in landing a blow, first with his left fist and then his right.
That son of a bitch. I'm going to rip him apart when I get my hands on him, Morgan promised himself. He thought about Dr. Malcolm as he punched the bag over and over again. Letting his anger out felt good. He punched again as he thought of Reid, and what that bastard had done to him not moments ago.
Morgan continued to vent his feelings on the punching bag until his anger had all but dissipated. He stopped punching as he realized how much sadness was beneath that anger. I can't fall apart. Not here, not now. If I do, I will be useless to help Reid, Morgan thought to himself. He stuffed down his growing desire to let the despair out. A few deep breaths, and he felt a little more in control.
Morgan thought about Reid again, replaying the video in his mind. When Malcolm had removed Reid's shirt and belt, Morgan had almost been sick thinking of what the psychologist might be getting ready to do to Reid; the same thing that had happened to Morgan as a teenager, and he hoped none of his team ever had to go through. It didn't happen. Dr. Malcolm wasn't interested in him, Morgan had to remind himself. Of course, what DID happen to Reid was no walk in the park either. Morgan knew a beating like that would leave its scars on both Reid's body and mind.
I'm going to find you, kid. I promise you, I'll do whatever it takes to bring you home to us.
Morgan sighed. He needed to get back to work. It was the only way they were going to find him in time.
Stepping back on to the elevator, Morgan pressed the appropriate button to bring him back to the BAU.
Emily didn't have a private office, so she headed to the washroom to collect her thoughts. Clicking the lock shut behind her, she moved to the sink and turned on the tap. Her hands splashed water on her face several times before she turned the tap off and grabbed a paper towel. As she dried her face, she looked up into the mirror.
I look like hell. But nowhere near as bad as Reid looks, Emily thought to herself. She cared about the young genius deeply. Sure he was strange, but that was one of the things that endeared her to him. When she had first joined the team, Reid welcomed her with an open heart and she was forever grateful to him for that.
He's the best person I know. And we're going to get him back. Emily refused to let the negative thoughts in. She refused to think about what would happen if Reid wasn't saved in time. I can't think about that, because it will never happen. I'll find him. We'll find him - his team; his family.
With one last look in the mirror, Prentiss assured herself that she looked presentable before unlocking the washroom door and heading back out to the conference room.
Rossi made a beeline for his own office as soon as Hotch had suggested it. He needed a few minutes alone to collect his thoughts. Slamming the door behind him, Rossi paced the room as thoughts swirled through his brain.
Is this my fault? I should have remembered Dr. Malcolm earlier. How could I have been so blind? Rossi beat himself up over not figuring this out sooner. He was the only one who had been with Reid that day two years ago. Reid had depended on Rossi to remember, and he had failed him. I won't fail you again Reid. I'm going to find you; I promise you that.
He thought about what Dr. Malcolm had said in the video. 'That's what Rossi said last time.' If I had kept up my end of the bargain, would Reid still be here with us? There was no way to know for sure, but Rossi suspected a deal with the DA wouldn't have changed anything for Dr. Malcolm. The man hadn't been convicted of his crimes anyway. I'll make damn sure you are this time, Rossi thought to himself.
Realizing that several minutes had passed and he needed to get back to work, Rossi stopped pacing. He stood still in the middle of his office for a moment, and looked out the window towards the bullpen. His office looked straight out to where Reid's desk was. What Rossi wouldn't give to see Reid sitting there again.
Rossi sighed and regained his composure. He needed to be strong for the team, he knew.
He opened his office door and rejoined the team that was reconvening in the conference room.
Hotch left the conference room and entered his office. He closed the blinds and sat at his desk. Alone for the first time since this has started, Hotch finally let his defenses down.
He leaned back in his chair, covered his eyes with one hand, and replayed in his mind the scene he had just watched. Reid had been so vulnerable, and must have been in so much pain by the end of the beating.
The look Reid had given the team at the end of the video had nearly broken Hotch. He had told his team to be strong for Reid, but it was clear that Reid was trying to be strong for them. Hotch's heart swelled with pride for the man that he considered practically family.
The full impact of the drugs Reid was on had hit Hotch as he watched that video as well. Reid couldn't even speak, let alone move. To be a profiler, held captive, with no ability to talk your way out of the situation, had to be incredibly frustrating. Reid's greatest asset was his mind, but if he couldn't communicate then it was useless to help him. Hotch realized that Reid was entirely dependent on them to find him. He wasn't going to be able to save himself this time. They couldn't let him down.
Abducted, drugged, and tortured by a madman. Hotch couldn't help but draw similarities between Reid's current situation, and the Tobias Hankel case several years ago. That case had almost broken Reid. Hotch just hoped this one didn't do the same.
Hotch hardened his resolve as he stood. He had been helpless to stop Dr. Malcolm from hurting Reid during the video broadcast, but he wasn't helpless now. They had a positive ID on the man, and with any luck would be able to track him down and end this before Dr. Malcolm decided Reid needed another 'punishment.'
Hotch popped two ibuprofen from his desk drawer, swallowing them dry, before standing and heading back to the conference room. Morgan was right – they didn't have any time to waste. Every minute lost now was another that Reid was left all alone and vulnerable. It was time to bring him home.
Garcia remained where she sat. Everyone else had left the room, but her eyes hadn't even left the screen yet. Her mind was replaying the video over and over again.
He's going to be okay. He's going to be okay. He' s going to be okay. It was like a mantra for her. He has to be.
Garcia had a lot of faith in their team, and was sure that they would find him. But she needed it to happen sooner rather than later. She was just keeping it together here, and she didn't know how much longer she could keep that up.
Garcia knew that it was up to her to find a location for Reid, and she didn't want to waste any more time. Knowing that the team needed information from her to move forward on the case, she placed her hands on the keyboard and finished doing what she was doing before the video link arrived. Garcia pulled everything she could find about Dr. Arthur Malcolm.
Garcia knew Hotch had wanted her to take a break, but working made her feel better. It gave her something to do. If she didn't keep working, she would fall apart. And if that happened, she would have a hell of a time putting herself back together again. She needed to be strong. For Reid. Because he's being strong for us.
Garcia typed faster than she ever had before, compiling information and waiting for the rest of the team to come back to the room so they could catch this guy.