Weiss Reacts to Team Fortress 2!

A/N: Welcome, one and all, to Weiss Reacts! Yes, we're still around, and I'd like to announce, to all you fans of Remnant's Reclaimer, that Hysterical Clerical Hijinks has provided his/her permission to do a chapter on it! You may now praise my name, worship idols or statues of me, or attempt to kidnap me out of obsessive love to possess me for your very own; rest assured, there isn't a huge queue, if any, for that.

Anyway, I also just realised, we are almost 35 chapters away from the end of Volume 2! That's right, nearly there. Which means climactic arcs and such to get excited over.

Anyway, let's get this chapter on the road! I also take no responsibility for failure to reflect accurate gameplay of TF2, in part due to the fact that I almost only ever play on boss fight servers. Apologies in advance!

Also, The Zombineer, this one's for you.

DISCLAIMER: RWBY does not belong to me, otherwise Ren's mother would be a ninja (thanks, Half-Blind Otaku, for the inspiration)!

Team Fortress 2 belongs to Valve.

All mentioned franchises and characters belong to their respective owners.

Warning for spoilers.

Blake twitched, putting down her tablet. She clenched her fist, starting to shake angrily.

"...that...that fool!" She slapped the desk with her fist, causing Yang to look over at her, concerned.

"Eh, Blakey?"
"T-this person..." The catgirl pointed angrily at the screen on the tablet. "T-this...counterpart of mine claims to have made the first AI!"

Yang looked closely at the screen, studying the text. "Alright...hey, I love this fic!"
"READ IT!"
"Alright, alright!" The brawler responded hurriedly. "No need to get your panties in a twist...

...Yui from SAO? Wouldn't be my first choice. I'd probably play Aigis for an AI-"
"...and she's an accursed moeblob." Blake growled. "...curse her kind and curse her!"

"You're still sore about Hokuago Tea-Time, aren't you?"
"They still shouldn't have won, but t-that isn't the point!" The catgirl snapped angrily, glaring intensely at Yang.

"The point is, this fool thinks that her stupid AI is better than the three mecha I've created, the series of personal assistant robots I ended up making, and the unique engines that I PATENTED, that I constructed POWERED OFF PEOPLE'S AURA!"

Yang sighed, placing a hand on her shoulder to put her down slightly. "Blake, then why are you getting so mad? You've done twice as much as this other Blake's done."
The catgirl twitched, irritated. Yang actually took a step back, somewhat unnverved.

"You think this is some kind of game?! This is a challenge! A CHALLENGE!" Blake declared. "And one I plan to answer with my own AI!"
"Wait, what-" Yang started, but Blake was already standing up.

"Yang! Ready the Catcave!"
"I thought we agreed, we weren't ripping off Batman!" Yang complained, before remembering something. "Actually...hang on a minute."

"What do you want?"

Yang smirked mischievously, a glint appearing in her eyes. "You see, Weiss is trying out Team Fortress 2. She loves playing with Rubes...but-"
"That explains why she's been strangely less violent lately." Blake nodded slowly. "Carry on."
"You see...I'm scared she might actually be..." The brawler swallowed. "...better than me at it."
Blake stared at her, shocked. "...Weiss, beating you in a game?!"

"She beat me in Mafia and Civilization!" Yang complained, sighing. "That's why I'm scared that if she beats me in this too, I'll never hear the end of it! It'll be the END of Antics! The END!"

Blake started rubbing her chin, curious. "...and you want me to make an AI that beats her at it?"

"Yes." The brawler smiled, confident. "I'm glad we see eye to eye. I want her to be unbeatable at most-if not all- games."
"Heh. As it so happens, an associate of mine provided me with the basic framework for a skilled game-playing AI that might be able to do just the job you might be looking for."

"Which associate? Nagato or Fujisaki?"
"Fujisaki."

"Oh, not related to the Antic Order." Yang frowned. "Shame. Suzumiya could've used her connections-"
Blake chuckled. "I doubt she of all people would agree unless she got something out of it.

Give me three days. I'll have your AI for you."

"...wait, wait." Yang held up a finger, before passing her a slip of paper with several links.
"I want you to model the AI after her. Use these to get a sense of her."
"Why?" The catgirl raised an eyebrow as her eyes pored over the links.

"Well, one, so we have a rival for 'person-like AI' in our world, and two, because why not? This girl called HinaNamiFan on this one Fire Emblem forum introduced that game to me." Yang chuckled. "Please, Blakey? For me? I know you love me~"
Blake blushed slightly. "N-not that much...wait, hang on. What do I get in exchange?"

Yang crossed her arms, thinking quickly. "...hm.

Well, Blake, I can get you an in with the Antic Order. You always wanted to meet Zelretch, right?"
Blake stared at her in amazement. "Y-you'd do that?!"

"If you get me an AI that can beat Weiss."

The catgirl grinned. "Alright, get me a meeting with O-Zelretch-sama and I'll get you your AI."

"Done deal." Yang chuckled, pumping her fist. "Operation Take Weiss Down A Notch is a-go!"

Three days later...

Weiss smirked at Yang, crossing her arms. In front of her on the computer screen was a successful end-of-game screen. Weiss' class was Medic, with ten successful Ubercharges, one death and twenty kills, along with dominations on two of the enemy team, along with multiple assists from healing.

"Well, Xiao Long?" The heiress inquired smugly. Yang clapped condescendingly

"My, nice work...for an amateur."

"Amateur? This is better than how you've ever done in a game." Weiss declared. "Just admit it, I would beat you at this game."

Yang grinned. "So, you're a pro at this game, are you?"
"I wouldn't go so far as to say that." The heiress pointed out, looking up smugly. "After all, that would be vain of me, and I am nothing if not humble."

Ruby raised a finger. "She has a point. Weiss finally found a game she didn't ragequit from."

"Alright!" The brawler cracked her knuckles. "You're on, Scout v Scout, stock weapons only."

The heiress smirked. "Alright. 2Fort?"

"The only map deserving of such a competition." Yang announced proudly. "You know I wouldn't have it any other way!"

Weiss stretched her fingers, exhaling. "Alright, Xiao Long. Let's prove who's better at this game."

Minutes later, on 2Fort...

Yang and Weiss stared intensely at each other, then at their screens, clicking furiously as they circled the map, hiding and trying to get the drop on each other.

"Heh. Smooth moves for a newbie." Yang giggled. Weiss didn't miss a beat.

"This newbie happens to be thrashing you nine to one on flags."

Weiss' Scout was hovering around the bridge, waiting for Yang to show up from her base and taunting while she was waiting. Meanwhile, Yang's ran underneath the bridge and through the water, hoping to get the drop on her.

"Yes, come on..." The brawler muttered. "Almost there..."

'I'll sneak up behind her from the basement and blast her away. That should break her concentration long enough to-'
"Gotcha."

The moment Yang popped out from the stairs, Weiss blasted her repeatedly with the scattergun, scoring several critical hits and ending her with a shot to the head.

The brawler smacked her bed. "Damn it!"
Weiss smirked. "Is that all?"

"No, no, not over yet..." Yang muttered quickly. "Come on, there's a minute left, I can still score ONE kill on you!"

"I doubt it." Weiss' had her Scout's back turned to the entrance from the bridge, as Yang's ran over the roof of the bridge.

'I'll blast her twice in the back and nail her with the bat. That SHOULD work, even if I don't cap the last flag, I can still claim more kills...'

With a battle cry, the brawler sent her Scout into battle, double-jumping from the roof and at Weiss, blasting her twice in the back, landing one crit.

The heiress whirled around, and blasted her into the water with her own scattergun, before leaping in and battering her to death with her baseball bat.

You failed, the announcer called on Yang's screen, as the tell-tale critical sparkling of victory sounded from Weiss' screen.

Yang sighed, staring at the respawn screen as Weiss laughed, pumping her fist and cheering.

"There's a reason this game is called Team Fortress, y'know..." Yang pointed out. The heiress giggled.

"What, sore that I beat you at something, fair and square?"
Ruby nodded at Yang's point. "Yeah, we really need to get everyone to play a proper game of this-"

"Alright!" The brawler stood up suddenly. "Since you insist that you're good at this game, let me introduce you to a good friend of mine.

Ever heard of someone called Chiaki Nanami? Best gamer in all of Vytal?"

"...doesn't ring a bell, no." Weiss squinted. "She an anime character or something?"

"Eh, they always say that about her." Yang stated. "She's, erm, a good friend of mine, so to speak."

"Never heard of her." The heiress muttered suspiciously.

Ruby inquired, curious. "Wasn't she from that-"
"Shush, Rubes!" The brawler snapped uncharacteristically harshly.

Weiss looked curiously at her. "What was that?"
The brawler giggled, rubbing Ruby's head rather roughly. "Ignore Ruby, she's getting stuff confused! Hehehehe!"

'Damn it, Rubes, you're killing my prank! I need her not to be suspicious or else three days of preparation for this will go to waste...'

"...I'm not liking this. Who is she and why are you bringing her up?"
"A gamer friend of mine, goes by the tag 'Ultimate Gamer' or 'Super High-School Level Gamer'. She loves games, and she's never failed to clear a single one. She LOVES TF2, too."

"How do I know this 'Chiaki' isn't from the stupid Antic Order or one of our gamer friends?" The heiress squinted. Yang sighed.

"Very well, I'll have her up on DustChat. She's the best gamer I know." Yang admitted. "Better than me."
"Better than you in Team Fortress 2 terms isn't amazing." The heiress reminded her.

Ruby, meanwhile, rubbed her chin.

"Ultimate Gamer, Ultimate Gamer...I know I've heard that thing somewhere..."

"...alright." Weiss cracked her knuckles, confident. "So, you're offering that me and Chiaki fight, yes?"
"To prove how good you are." Yang completed for her, nodding slowly. "If you beat her, you're the best gamer I know, and you have the right to get back at me for any one antic I have ever done upon you."
Weiss' eyes glittered at the opportunity. "Get back at you? And all I have to do is beat your friend?

You must be confident that she can beat me."

"Very much so." The brawler extended her hand. "Thief's honor. You beat her, you're entitled to one hit on me, redeemable at any time."

"You're on." The heiress shook her hand firmly. She chuckled.

'Heh. This Chiaki girl hasn't met a Schnee like me. I will surely win- no mere mortal can beat me in this game! This game will be conquered for the Schnee Empire, and not even this self-supposed Ultimate Gamer can beat me!

Yang's fallen for her own scam, hook, line-

-and sinker.' Blake thought, on the phone to Yang. Weiss was inside, waiting for the call from 'Chiaki'.

"She fell for the bait- she thinks that Chiaki's a real person." Yang stated. "You got all the routines and the stuff in?"

"Yes. I even took the advantage of downloading her voice files from your copy of the game to make her sound legit." Blake chuckled. "It was child's play to make everything else. She's set up for video chat, too. Nanami V0.92, courtesy of our friend, is up and ready for battle."
"Perfect." The brawler nodded. "I'm calling her account now. Be sure to ready her up."

"Alright. You had better get me my meeting with O-Zelretch-sama."
"Relax, Blakey, I will."

...

Yang walked back in holding her laptop up to show Weiss her screen. It was on DustChat, and she'd called Nanami on video.

Weiss laughed. "So you weren't lying. Chiaki exists after all."

Yang smiled ominously. "Why would I lie? It's not like I can just make up a person from whole cloth."

"Norn and Vivi prove otherwise."

"Point taken."

The video call flickered into action, as Weiss stared at her opponent-to-be.

Her face was somewhat round, with pale skin induced from constantly being indoors- presumably from gaming- and pale pink hair, barely reaching down to her shoulders. Her eyes were half closed, and Weiss could see her eyes were of the same color as her hair.

She swore she'd seen this girl before, but she hadn't remembered where.

"Hey, Nanami-san." Yang whistled. "Wake up!"
"Hunh..." The girl slowly awoke, blinking briefly as she took stock of her surroundings. "...oh. I'm in a DustChat call?"

"Yes, remember? You wanted to meet my friend, Weiss?"

Chiaki slowly nodded, realising what was going on. "...oohhhh. Hello, Weiss." She gave her a small smile, before yawning. "Sleepy..."

"Good day to you." The heiress greeted back. "So. I hear you're good at TF2?"
"I wouldn't say I'm that good..." She responded. "But they do say that about me...I think."

Weiss crossed her arms. "Curious. Your Steam profile even says you've cleared the achievements."

Yang giggled. She'd actually owned the fake account Chiaki was to use for this prank- she'd cleared it years ago and decided to loan it out to her for the sake of this operation; right down to redoing the profile and changing the name.

"Oh yeah...alright." She nodded. "..."

"...is there something you wish to-"
"You want to have a one versus one with me on a co-operative game?"
"...I suppose, yes." Weiss nodded. "Yang here doesn't seem to think I can beat you."

"Alright. Let's go..."

Yang rubbed her hands together. "Excellent. Prepare to eat your words, Schnee."
"Prepare to eat humble pie, Xiao Long. Your reign of antics ends here!"

On 2Fort...

Weiss cracked her knuckles, looking to her opponent. "So, first one to capture two flags."

"Yep, sounds good to me...I think."

Yang and Ruby sat back, watching Weiss get ready to fight.

Ruby was still unsure. "I still think I know her name..."
"Shush, Rubes." Yang commanded somewhat softly. "Let's see if Weiss wins. I'm personally betting on Nanami."
"Why?" The reaper tilted her head. "You know Weiss is ridiculously hard to beat in any game she's really good at, right?"
"Oh, you don't know Nanami like I do, then."

The set-up phase ended, and Weiss, on the Soldier class, got ready to fight. She immediately ran out to the battlements, pulling off a rocket-jump towards the enemy battlements on the RED side.

'Simple plan, head in, blow up Chiaki, get the flag, rinse and repeat.' The heiress plotted. 'Not so-'

The heiress was interrupted rather brutally by several explosions reducing her to mush. Chiaki had been standing behind the entrances, having blown her to bits with a rocket launcher.

"...l-lucky shot." The heiress muttered as she respawned. "Alright, let's do this, properly this time.

CHAAARGE-"

As soon as Weiss exited the respawn room, her opponent blew her up with three well-aimed rockets. The heiress' eyelid twitched.

"...again?"

"Shush." Chiaki warned her harshly. "Trying to play a game. Quit talking."

The enemy has secured the intelligence.

"Seriously?" The heiress grumbled, sighing and switching to Pyro. "Okay, if you insist..."

Weiss immediately awaited her at the closest exit point from the intelligence area, flamethrower in hand.

'I'll just airblast her projectiles at her! Surely that cannot be beaten by her, right?'

"Alright, here goes!" The heiress roared. "COME ON! FACE THE WRATH OF THE-"

It was not three seconds before Chiaki rounded the corner with the glowing-blue intelligence and shut her down again, this time shooting her down with a shotgun. She ran past the heiress' dead body, running off to her base to submit the intelligence.

You failed. The enemy has secured our intelligence.

Weiss stared at the screen. "One to-"

"See?" Yang smirked. "Told you Nanami was-"

"T-this is just a temporary set-back!" The heiress cried. "I'll beat her!"

'Different tack. This time, set up in the intelligence room with the Engineer. Surely she cannot beat a dispenser and a sentry!'

So it was that the heiress camped in the intelligence room, just waiting and daring her opponent to attack her impenetrable defences.

"Come on, come on..." Weiss drummed her fingers on the desk. "Come at me, co-OH COME ON!"

She was backstabbed and her sentries sapped. Chiaki ran past her again, stealing the intelligence for the second time.

'Are you serious?!' The heiress mentally raged. 'She shouldn't...j-just what kind of gamer is this girl?!'

As soon as she respawned, she attempted to give chase using her Scout class, but it was no use. By the time she'd realised her opponent had gone through the bridge, it was too late.

You failed. The enemy has secured our intelligence.

Yang merely smirked at Weiss, chuckling. "Too good to be true, eheh?"

"B-be silent! I can still pull this back!" The heiress concentrated carefully on the screen, trying to tune out Yang.

'Alright, if you can't beat 'em, join 'em. I'll just use HER tactics. Soldier, blow her up and so on. I'll sneak under her base and this should work.'

Weiss determinedly snuck underneath the bridge towards the RED base, rocket at the ready to blow her opponent to bits if needed.

"That's it, that's it..." The heiress giggled somewhat maniacally. "I will win this game, I will win..."

Ruby reached out. "Weiss...you're a little too..."

"BE SILENT I WILL WIN"

The heiress finally got to the intelligence room. No defences of any kind were present, and she even launched rockets at the likely spots for Spies to be. Weiss exhaled.

"I will be victorious! I WILL BE-"
Alert. The enemy has taken our intelligence.

"What, how?!" Weiss glared at the screen, before hurriedly looking around. "Come on, Chiaki, show your face, show you-"

The last kill of the game was Chiaki's Scout appearing from the sideward entrance to the intelligence room, blasting her away with several crit shots from the scattergun as she carried the intelligence to her own.

You failed.

Yang smirked. "I guess you don't get to get back at me, huh."

"Good...yawn...game..." Chiaki congratulated the heiress, whose eyelid began twitching.

"I...I lost..."

"...don't worry, Weiss..." Ruby patted her on the back. "You'll win next time..."
"Hey hey." The gamer smiled at Weiss. "You'll get...better. There's always a second time... I think-"
"I DEMAND a rematch!" The heiress cried. "This time, I will beat you and Yang will no longer brag!"

Yang crossed her arms. "Only if she's fine with it."
"I'm always...ready for gaming..." The girl replied sleepily. "... what map?"
"Double Cross." Weiss cracked her knuckles. "I'm sure you won't be able to beat me-"

Minutes later...

"SCREW THIS GAME!" Weiss stood up, angered. Yet again, Chiaki had beaten her without taking a single death or loss of intelligence.

"...you don't have to be so mad..." Her opponent offered kindly.

"S-shut up! D-damn you, Xiao Long! DAMN YOU!"

With that, the heiress stormed out, muttering forcefully to herself. Yang laughed.

"That completely worked! And the status quo has been restored!" The brawler concluded. "Thanks, Nanami, you've been a great help. I'll leave you to gaming now, eh?"

"Thank you. Have a nice day..." With a yawn, she hung up, and Ruby stared at Yang curiously.

"...she's an AI, isn't she."
Yang smiled. "Oh, Ruby. You never cease to amaze me. How could you tell?"
"Her skin was too...perfect," The reaper stated. "Also, she was...from that one visual novel you got into recently, wasn't she?"
"...damn it, Ren." The brawler cursed jokingly. "...yes, she's an AI. I used her to troll Weiss. I had Blake base her off that character to make her seem more legit."

"Why?"
"For the lulz. Why do I do anything?" Yang stated, shrugging. "Plus, Blake wanted her a new AI to compete with one of her counterparts in another fanfic, so she decided to get one.

I decided to piggyback on that plan."

Ruby frowned. "You know, it wouldn't kill you to lighten up on Weiss..."
"Yes, but it's just so fun to see her ragequit!" The brawler complained, before sighing.

"...fine, I'll make it up to her, since you asked so nicely. I'll get her some of that nice vanilla sorbet she likes from the Schnee Creamery."

Ruby smiled brightly. "I knew you would do it."

END

DISCLAIMER: Chiaki and Super Dangan Ronpa 2 belong to Spike Chunsoft. Retroactive spoiler warning for chapters 5 and 6 of SDR2.

A/N: And so, we now have our very own adorable true AI. Yui, eat your heart out.

Now-STINGER

Hours later, down in Blake's mech hangar...

"...heh. So the tests with Nanami were a success." Blake giggled as Yang regaled her with just how easily her AI had beaten Weiss.

"Not a scratch. That was well played."

Yang nodded, smiling. "Yep. It seems we've created the exact opposite of Weiss- the ultimate gamer to beat the ultimate anti-gamer.

So...I'm curious."

"Hum?"
"You say this Fujisaki guy, who set you up with the stuff for Nanami trusted you with her code."

"Yes."
"That implies you're either great friends or you've made one before and know how to handle them."

Blake smiled knowingly. "So, you figured it out.

Nanami is the second AI I made, even if she's not wholly my work."

Yang's eyes widened. "Wait, wait, you made a second one?!"

The catgirl nodded in accord. "Indeed, I made one before her.

Would you like me to show you where it's currently stored?"

Yang nodded eagerly. "Please, I want to know what this one is!"

The catgirl grabbed on some nearby tarp. "Alright. Feast your eyes.

I've been working on this project ever since we ended the Great Antic War. I realised that had nothing to counter air assaults like Glynda's Bullhead, so I...made one of my own.

I introduce to you...my newest project."

She swept off the tarp from the project. Yang stared at it, eyes wide in amazement.

"...holy Dust. That is awesome."

"It's not yet fully operational. I have no doubt that Project YAMATO will do far better than a Bullhead ever will. Perhaps even space travel might be achievable, if I can just work some things out with the hull plating.

Of course, it's not a final name. I have a...better one in mind than YAMATO."

There you have it. Kids, feel free to take note, you know how I am with Chekhov's Gunmen. Giving a character a name in this fic is basically saying 'THIS GUY WILL BE IMPORTANT LATER'.

Also, Project YAMATO is not a mecha. All I have to say. And it's not as obvious as you think.

Next time, we'll be doing oobidoobi's Paternal Message series, courtesy of the great artist him/herself over on DeviantArt. And yes, we will be doing Mann versus Machine and a proper, RWBY versus JNPR team game at a later date. As well as the trailers.

So, I hope you enjoyed that, leave your ideas, comments, suggestions, criticisms, reviews and thoughts, and I hope you have a GREAT day! Until next time!