*Thank-you for the reviews on the last chapter They were greatly appreciated. Thank-you all so much!*
DEAN:
Ana, Natalia and I arrived at the lake later in the afternoon yesterday than I had wished but I slept in too late and then Ana was discussing wedding things with Sonya so we didn't get a lot of time to spend at the cabin doing much yesterday except for swimming in the lake and then taking a little hike before sitting around a campfire eating roasted marshmallows and making S'mores. It was a great night. This morning I'm taking Natalia fishing for a daddy/daughter day something we don't really get too much anymore as she is getting older and I'm out on the road more. I miss my time with her. Ana can't handle the smell of fish or the thought of fishing so it was best she stay back at the cabin while Natalia and I go out to do the fishing. "I've never gone fishing before, Dad," she says as we walk to the spot we will be fishing.
"I know," I say, "are you ready to do this?"
"I guess," she says with a smile. "Is it gross?"
"You and your mom," I say with a smile. "I mean fish are slimy and they can smell but I don't think it's gross."
"It doesn't sound very pleasant," she says.
"It's a good way to pass time," I say, "my mom used to bring me up here when I was a little boy."
"Cool," she says. "I never met your mom how come?"
"My mom died when you were a baby," I say.
"How did she die?" she asks as we reach our fishing spot. "Was she sick?"
"In a way yes and in a way no, she was more mentally sick than she was physically sick but that's not why she died," I say. "Well, her mental illness played a part in it but that's not how she died."
"Oh," she says. "So how did she die?"
"Someone hurt her," I answer. "They hurt her badly and she didn't make it."
"Oh," she says, "was she nice?"
"When she wasn't sick," I say, "she was really nice."
"How was she sick?"
"She was into some bad stuff," I say, "that made her sick. She had something called addiction."
"Like to drugs? We learned about addiction in school and people get dependent on drugs."
"Something like that," I say as I open up the tackle box as I hand her fishing pole to her.
"Do you miss her, Dad?"
"Yes," I say, "I wish she was still here so she could see everything that I've accomplished and everything I've done in my life. I think she would be proud of me."
"I'm proud of you," she says with a smile as I smile back at her.
"I'm glad to hear that," I say.
"So what do I do?" she asks me.
I smile at her as she kneels down with me. I pull out the bait from the tackle box and the hook. "You just do it like this," I show her how to do it.
"Okay," she says as I hand her what she needs and then help her set it up. "Now what?"
"You just put it into the water and wait for a fish to take the bait," I say with a smile.
"Are we eating these fish?"
"If we can catch any your mom can fry them up for dinner."
"I don't think that's happening," she says as we take a seat together and cast our line into the water. "She said fish makes her sick."
"Right now," I say, "so then I'll fry it up."
"Oh," she says with a bit of disgust in her voice. "I just like the fish you get from the store that comes in a box like fish sticks. Not all this," she says.
"It's fun," I say, "we're having a nice father daughter day."
"I know," she says.
"So how is everything going with you? Are you ready to start school in a few weeks?"
"I guess," she says, "I am not really into school," she says, "it's really hard sometimes except math. I get math."
"I know the feeling," I say, "I got math too but reading wasn't easy either. You'll get there."
"I hope so and I won't know anyone in my school," she says.
"You'll make new friends," I say. "I think you're going to like it there."
"I guess. I want to go back to ballet. When can I do that?"
"You really love ballet don't you?" I ask as I look at her. She's beautiful. She's one of the things I am most proud in my life. She has the most beautiful dirty blonde hair that is turning blonde from the summer sun braided off to the side and she has the most beautiful blue eyes. She is me in every way. She is my little clone.
"It's everything. I get ballet. I don't get anything else as much as I get ballet. You tell me to do something I can do it no problem but at school it takes a lot of extra explaining for me to do. I feel at home when I do ballet. I can't really describe it. It's like something that makes me feel comfortable."
"I know the feeling, your mom was the same way when she did ballet. She loved it so much. It was everything to her much like wrestling is everything to me. I get that too. I understand that but other things I don't get much either."
"Why did mom quit ballet if she loved it so much?" she asks me.
"Well," I say, "because she became a mommy so she walked away from a ballet scholarship at the Geoffrey to be your mom."
"What? She gave up a scholarship to one of the best ballet schools in the country to be my mom?"
"Yes," I say. "She loves you so much she would do anything for you even if it means giving up something she loves so much."
"Wow, that's a lot of love."
"Yeah it is," I say with a smile as we continue to fish. "So what's the issue with you not wanting a baby brother? What do you have against him already he's not even here to annoy you yet," I say jokingly although I am sure that will be her little brother's main job when he gets here.
"I don't know," she says, "I just don't want a baby brother or a baby sister. I like the way things are. It's been just me for a long time and I like it like that. The baby is going to ruin all that. I have all of your attention and all of mom's attention. When the baby comes that's going to change everything and it's not fair. I like having you and mom back together and you living with us. I always wanted a family like that," she says making me feel bad, "but now you're home with us and now this baby is coming. You're going to be too busy with wrestling and with him to worry about me," she says. "And I don't want to lose you."
"You're not losing me," I say, "you'll never lose me," I say. "There's enough of me to go around. Yes babies are a lot of work and require a lot of attention but that doesn't mean that mom and I are going to forget about you. I will still have time for you. I will always have time for you so will your mom. Just because your brother will be there doesn't mean you won't exist anymore."
"You promise?"
"I promise," I say as I wrap my arm around her shoulders. "And you're older now, Natalia. You're going to start going out to hang out with friends and developing your own life. I'm more worried about you forgetting about me and leaving me."
"Is that why we're fishing?" she asks, "because you're scared?"
"Sort of," I say, "I just want to have some daddy daughter time with you but I am scared you're going to forget about me. When you start hanging out with friends and when you start to do your own thing. I'm not going to have these times with you. You're going to start to choose your friends over me."
"Dad, I'm not going to leave you or forget you. I love you. I like our time together. I will never give that up."
"I hope not," I say with a smile. "So what do you want to be when you grow up?"
"A ballerina, I want to be part of the American Ballet Company and dance in ballets like the Nutcracker and Sleeping Beauty and lots of other ballets."
I smile and say, "you can do whatever you want. I'm going to make sure your dreams come true. What if you don't make it as a ballerina then what will you be?"
"I want to do dance choreography," she says, "I want to make my own ballet and dances if I can't be a ballerina. I don't want to do anything that doesn't involve dance."
"Cool," I say with a smile.
"So if your mom died where's your dad?" she asks.
"My dad left us when I was very young," I say, "I don't know much about him and I don't wish to."
"Oh," she says, "I'm glad you didn't leave us."
"Me too," I say with a smile. "I never could you and your mom are everything to me."
"Really?"
"Really," I say with a smile.
"So you don't have a family?"
"The only family I need is you, Oliver and mom," I say.
"And Uncle Roman and Uncle Seth right?"
"Right," I say with a smile. "I'm sorry I haven't really been around much with this wrestling thing. I know I miss a lot of stuff with you and I am sorry."
"It's fine, Dad," she says, "you're doing your job. You've always done your job. It's really okay. If you miss something I understand. I know you still love me whether you're with me or you're not. You're there when I need you and that's what matters whether you talk to me on the phone, skype me or you're actually here. If I need to talk to you, you always drop what you're doing to talk to me. That's what matters and you love me a lot."
"I do love you a lot," I say with a smile. "How did you get to be so smart, Natalia?"
"Mom," she says honestly with a smile as she looks at me with her blue eyes.
"You're probably right about that. Your mom is a pretty smart lady huh?"
"Yeah," she says with a smile. "I want to be like you two someday and how you love each other. I hope I marry the guy I first fall in love with in high school."
"You have a while yet before you think about boys not till you're 30," I say with a smile.
"But you and mom were 17 when you had me," she says, "and have been together ever since. That's a beautiful love story."
"You don't know what love is," I say.
"Yes I do," she says with a smile. "It's what you and mom have. You two love each other a lot. You're happy with each other and you two have been in love since you were 17 and still in love. You look at each other like you're falling in love all over again. You two have a really beautiful love story," she says with a smile.
"It is one of my favorites," I say with a smile.
"Me too," she says with a smile. "Dad! I caught a fish! I think I caught a fish!"
I help her reel it in and sure enough she caught a fish. She caught a big fish. I get it off the hook and throw it into the cooler before she's ready to do it again. We spend the mid-morning fishing with each other and talking. I am enjoying this time with her. We're laughing and we're having fun. We end up catching 5 fish total she catches at least 3 and I catch 2. She's a pro already. We headed back to the cabin after our fishing trip and I took care of the fish for dinner before we spent the afternoon as a family swimming in the lake. We follow it up by me cooking us dinner over the fire and then sitting around the campfire eating dinner together before we roast marshmallows. "I have had the best time!" says Natalia. "I want to do this again."
"We will," I say.
"We will?" asks Ana.
"We will, this," I say pointing to the cabin and the land around us, "is all ours. We own this now."
"You bought this cabin and this land?" she asks.
"A few acres but yes we own this cabin and part of the lake and part of the trail."
"Wow," she says, "what brought that on?"
"I like to do stuff like this," I say. "I just want to spend some time in the summer here and enjoy some days away from the craziness of our lives. It's been such a fun weekend here."
"Wow," she says with a smile. "I like it."
"Me too," says Natalia as she eats her marshmallow. "It's so quiet and peaceful here. Nothing like New York or Connecticut and I love fishing."
"She did well with fishing," I say to Ana as she's sitting in my lap. "She caught 3 of the 5 fish. She's a pro."
"Wow," says Ana with a smile. "Congratulations. That's really good. I couldn't catch a fish to save my life."
"It's really easy, Mom," she says with a smile. "I can show you."
"You're going to need to do that," she says with a smile as I rub her back softly.
"You feeling better, Baby?" I ask her.
"Yeah," she says, "Oliver just doesn't like fish."
"I know," I say, "I'm sorry."
"It's okay," she says, "he's moving right now."
"Can I feel him move?"
"You should be able to," she says taking my hand and placing it on her stomach. "Right here," she says holding my hand on her stomach and I smile as I feel his little kicks against my hand.
"He's kicking," I say with a smile. "Hey, Oliver," I say, "I'm your daddy and I can't wait to meet you. I love you so much already and I can't wait to see you come into this world and I know your big sister Natalia feels the same way."
"Can I feel him?" asks Natalia making me smile.
"Sure," says Ana with a smile. "Put your hand right here," she says pointing to her stomach. Natalia puts her hand on Ana's stomach and holds it there. "Do you feel it?"
"Yes," she says with a smile. "That's so cool."
"Isn't it?" she asks. "Your little brother loves you already."
"I think I might love him too," she says making us both smile before I kiss Ana's neck softly. "I have to meet him first."
"You'll love him," I say with a smile.
"Can I go catch fireflies now?" she asks.
"Have fun," I say with a smile before she runs off to catch fireflies leaving Ana and me alone. "I had fun with her today."
"I'm glad. It sounds like she had fun too. How did you get her to change her mind about Oliver?"
"We just had a talk about some things," I say, "it was nothing."
"You obviously did something right," she says with a smile.
"She is so smart, Ana. I didn't feel like I was talking to a 10 year old. I thought I was talking to an adult. She's so wise."
"She really is," she says with a smile. "She is very mature for her age."
"She is. I'm proud of her. She loves dance."
"I know. She wants to do anything and everything she can with dance when she gets older. I hope she makes it come true," she says as I wrap my arms around her waist and rest my head on her growing chest.
"We'll do everything we can to make sure it happens. Whatever she wants it's hers. We're going to give her the world."
"I know," she says as she runs her hands through my unruly hair. "You need to get a haircut. It's getting too wild. Not much just a little bit."
"I'll do that this week," I say. "She was asking questions."
"About?"
"My mom and dad, I answered her the best that I could. I miss my mom, Ana. She may not have been the best mom but she tried."
"I know, Baby," she says playing with my curls. "Is that why you bought this cabin and all this land?"
"Yeah," I say. "It's just something I loved so much when I was little. I loved coming here. It was one of the best times of my life. My mom was happy and she was free," I say with tears burning my eyes. "These are the best memories I have of her. She was sober and she wasn't using. We had so much fun here," I say as I try to hold back a sob. "I loved coming here it was nothing but good times for us and I wish she could be here with us today to enjoy this with us."
"She is," says Ana as she kisses the top of my head. "She's everywhere around here. She's here."
"I know but I want to actually be here. She would have loved Natalia."
"Yes she would have," she says, "I miss her too even if we didn't see eye to eye on some things I miss her."
"Yeah," I say. "She would be so proud of me and everything I accomplished. I would have bought her a house and bought her a car. I would have bought her anything she wanted. I would have given her a good life."
"I know, Baby," she says. "I know but you know she's watching you and she's very proud of you and everything you accomplished. She is probably smiling right now looking at everything you've done with your life, Jon. She would be so proud of you. You came from nothing to everything. She would be so proud."
"I know, Ana," I say. "As for my dad, I want Natalia to know him but does he really deserve that?"
"That's your choice," she says, "if you don't want him to have any part of her life then he doesn't need to. I know how you feel about him."
"Do you think he deserves a chance?"
"I think everyone deserves a second chance, Jon, you know that. I can't make you decide what you want to do. You have to decide for yourself. Do you want to try to talk to your dad?"
"A little bit but the last time he was such a selfish prick," I say, "but maybe he deserves a chance."
"It's up to you, Jon. You do what you need to do. I can't make the decision for you but what I can tell you that letting go of all this hatred and anger you have toward him will make you feel better, you'll feel a lot better. You don't have to be best friends with him but at least try to make things right but only if you want to. You don't have to invite him to the wedding or whatever but if you feel like you need to talk to him, get rid of the anger and hatred then do it. It's up to you."
"I think I want to talk to him. I don't want to be best friends but I do want to at least give him a chance. I want Natalia to know her other grandfather even if he is a jerk. It's going to take a while for everything to be right but I at least want to try."
"Okay," she says with a soft smile before she kisses my forehead softly. "You know what you need to do."
"Yeah," I say. "Ana, I love you so much."
"I love you too," she says and those three words coming from her mouth make me feel so good and make me feel special. Until her no one had ever told me they loved me. She was the first person to break through my rough edges and soften my heart. It's hers forever and it belongs to her for an eternity. Natalia is right we have a beautiful love story and it is one of my favorites. It will always be my favorite love story of all times.
*A/N: What did you think of Dean and Natalia's Daddy Daughter day? Do you think that it helped their relationship? What did you think of Natalia asking about Dean's parents? Do you think that Ana and Dean have a beautiful love story? What are your thoughts on Dean wanting to give his dad another chance? Do you think it's a good idea? What about him buying the cabin? Are you happy Natalia changed her mind about Oliver? Please review and thank-you for reading.