MENDING THE PEACES

Disclaimer- I do not owe Naruto

A/N- OK so I am having so much fun with this story and thank you all for reading it, so far seems everyone loves Gaara so after this chapter and perhaps 2 more the decision will be made. This chapter is short and I want to dedicate it to my best friend, she knows who she is. She loves Sai but I think he is not too good for Sakura at least not this Sakura.

Gaara 4

Hidan 1

Sasuke 2

Kakashi 1

ENJOY!

Chapter 6. What Could Have Been'

Sai's POV

It began with the simplest of things, and now I can't cope with the way I feel.

It's as troublesome as Shikamaru would say. These feelings issues are not at all easy. Emotions which I don't have …or maybe I did once long ago, but now … they are long gone, forgotten.

I am always watching, looking for any exprecions that way I can learn more about them. I can find their meaning and see if I have them or have had them before.

Books…they tell many things, I find I like books, they hold different explanations for different situations, but Sakura always says I should learn on my own. It's quite hard, I prefer reading, to me it's simpler, but it often brings me into more problems than answers.

Naruto calls me weirdo when all I do is call out facts. At first I thought he didn't like me, but then she said sometimes friends show affection that way.

I don't get it, so I tell her and she explains it better, than I asked her about nicknames because I came across a book that explains about friendship. I suggest I should have one for Naruto because I consider him a friend, she smiles at me and she sais I have to choose wisely and it has to be honest a true nickname that represents the most important part of him.

So I am, Than she explains I should sometimes tell that person something nice, she said sometimes it's better to say the contrary to what we really think to avoid hurting the person we hold dear.

I don't get it…she punched me because I did just as she said when I found her nickname; I called her ugly even though I think she is quite beautiful.

This friendships and emotions are difficult to understand (and painful…especially with Sakura) but she understands after I explained, and we meet every other day in the library.

One day I see her in the street and I ask for her help one more time.

I tell her the way I feel warm inside my belly every time she is around, and how my face turns red, I show her how red my ears get, and how shaky my hands get, I can't draw or concentrate .

I tell her I think I'm allergic to her because it happens every time she is near me.

"Sai…no"

She blushes and she looks nervous and surprised, she tells me it will go away eventually with time if I ignore it.

Somehow her features turn sad and she tells me she is ok when I ask if something is wrong. I know she is lying because of the way she bites her upper lip. I ask her…and tell her friends don't lie to each other, I tell her I would never lie to her because I feel I should always be honest to her.

She runs away…and I'm there standing by myself…in the middle of the street…and I feel …I feel …sadness?

The next day comes and I wait for her in the library…she never shows.

Next thing I know, Zetsu from Akatsuki got her.

And I feel … I feel…I don't know how I feel …because she is not here to explain this emotion I am getting, like if I want to punch someone.

"Watch it weirdo! We will get Sakura-Chan back…believe it"

So I go back to the books and back to the misinterpretations. I research my allergy reactions towards Sakura when I see her, so that way it won't be a problem when we get her back…I look for the meaning in a book…and the book says is LOVE…

I toss the book in the trash…Sakura was right … books are misleading the whole world.

Time passes and she is back with us, she is ok, I feel happy to see her again.

I know more about emotions now, and I noticed by the way she was acting; she didn't want to be rescued. She almost kills Naruto when he tore her from the older Traitor's arms, away from harm's way because Sasuke almost killed her next to Itachi.

The traitor is back, after I lied and called her ugly, I learned my lesson and swore not to do it again.

I still call her ugly, not because I think she is, but her expression brings happiness to me because every time I use it she smiles sweetly.

I frown as I see her cry…she cried so much over the enemy's dead body… (But he kept her away?).

After that every night I keep watch over her, somehow I am…I am Afraid?

I don't want her to be harmed again.

Every night after everyone is in bed sleeping I can hear the crying.

I hear it all, even when I'm trying to fall asleep.

And somehow I understand that the sadness she must feel when all the love around her is dying.

And I ask myself, how can she stay so strong? She keeps on smiling during the day, but no one can tell is fake. But I …I know her true smiles…all her smiles, and the ones she uses now are not them.

She puts on a mask every day.

How can she hide it all for so long?

So I ask myself, how can I take all her pain away? how can I save her?

If I was to draw her again…yes she would be smiling, but I see the truth, and she would be smiling in between the darkness. How could she have fallen from her light?

So I close my eyes…and the feeling of …Determination? Sparks.

I will try from far away to never let her fall, even if I have to keep watch night after night.

She keeps on smiling at us every day, and I know she is doing it to protect us from her pain, I know she wants to protect her precious person.

She wants us to feel like it will be ok, because she is back, but I know this is just a shell.

And I want to know, I have many unanswered questions.

How can she be so strong? How could she hide the pain for so long? How can I take that feeling away from her? How can I save her from the dark that is consuming her light?

I want to tell her she doesn't have to be alone.

I finally find her, she is standing on her balcony, I want to talk to her, but she is not alone…she is with …HIM. And I notice he leans in to kiss her. I feel …I feel ANGER? Am I MAD? And suddenly I remembered, I remembered when she was alone, suffering because of …HIM.

I remember when I was right beside her(so close yet not in time) ,and he did not stop or even acknowledge she was there as he reached for Itachi to make his kill, he did not see …the way she was standing in front of him…shielding him…The Shark man took her away than.

We all saw her after that…It looked like she when to hell and back again.

And tonight I can save her, I will be on time, so I do, just in time…and when he is gone, she hugs me, and I feel… I feel…I finally feel warm again.

But this time I don't ask her to explain this emotion… because I don't want her to run away, and go through this all over again. So I silently let her know I will not let the darkness take her smiles away.

I feel I'm smiling at her so I tell her.

"That's what friends are for" (you don't have to be alone, I want to make you smile every time I can)

And I will be here, guarding her smiles, even if it's from afar, because the smile she gave me than …Is just so real.

Yeah…emotions are a very complicated term… somehow I feel no one can learn them, really learn about them…but I am glad she was my teacher.

(A/N…. so what you guys think? Like or no like? Don't forget to read and review my dears…next chappie is almost done…o and vote GAARA KAKASHI SASUKE DEIDARA who?)