I own no one but my own people

Olivia walked into Monroes and saw Tucker sitting in their usual spot at the bar. The bar itself was nowhere near the 1-6 but it also was nowhere near Manhattan Internal Affairs so neither one had a reason to be worried that they would be found out by either work place.

Plus it was only a block and a half away from Olivia's apartment so if they wanted too they could always just walk back to her place afterwards.

Tucker had three rather large empty glasses sitting in front of him and another equally large glass almost finished by the time she showed up. She raised her brow slightly as she walked over to him. From what she saw of Tucker, he wasn't a heavy drinker. He sipped a glass of bourbon all night, sometimes two if he didn't have to work in the morning but Olivia had never seen him down three, almost four large drinks in one sitting.

This could get interesting…

"Started without me I see," she commented as she sat down beside him on the barstool.

Tucker turned towards her and gave a smile that didn't reach his slightly glossed over baby blue eyes. "Hey. Sorry but I just got here early, figured I might as well start." Without missing a beat Tucker downed the last of his drink and raised his hand to get the bartenders attention. "Lemme get another bourbon and a red merlot for the lady."

"Sweet tea is fine," she corrected, thinking that at least one of them should be sober and responsible. Considering her spouse's murderer didn't just come back into her hometown, it shouldn't have to be him.

"Gonna make me drink alone tonight?" asked Tucker as he got out a ten from his wallet and threw it on the bar.

"One of us should go into their work tomorrow without a hangover."

Tucker let out a humorless chuckle and nodded. "That is definitely going to be you…" As if to prove his point the second the bartender set their drinks down in front of them Tucker grabbed his and held it like he was giving a toast. "To Carrie." Without waiting for Olivia to even wrap her hand around her glass he had already drank half of his bourbon in one fell swoop.

He slammed the half empty glass down and let out a breath, nodding to her untouched tea. "Carrie… she never drank anything with alcohol. She said it made her act like an idiot and a dunce and she felt a lawyer should never be seen acting like that. All she'd ever drink was just Arnold Palmer. No soda, no juice... just Arnold Palmer in a can."

Olivia gave him a friendly smile. "She was a lawyer?"

Tucker nodded. "Public Integrity. I got a lot of cops in trouble when I was in uniform," he explained. "I didn't believe in that thin blue line crap even back then so when a cop broke the law, I dealt with him like I did if it was any other civilian."

Olivia stayed silent, knowing that right now probably wasn't the best time to discuss that sometimes that thin blue line was needed. Instead she just took a sip of her tea and nodded. "I actually dealt more with her then I did the ADA," said Tucker with a humorless laugh. "She had the same beliefs that I did about cops. That they should be held to a higher standard than civilians rather than be above the law. Carrie said I was the first cop she had ever met that felt that same way that wasn't in IAB. We started dating, five months into it I asked her to marry me, she said yes… a year later she was Mrs. Carrie Tucker."

He paused for a moment and Olivia could see his blue eyes beginning to blaze with the memories of her. "She was the only person apart from my mother that was happy for me when I made the move to IAB," he said softly as he glanced down at the bar, running a finger over a scratch in the wood. "Any friends I did have left in uniform abandoned me, told me that I was a rat and never talked to me again… Carrie said she was proud." He sniffed and cleared his throat, loosening his tie some. "Then again I could have been a garbage collector and Carrie would have been proud as long as it was something I liked to do."

Olivia reached over and gently rubbed his back, offering him a gentle smile. "She sounds like she was an amazing woman, Ed."

Tucker nodded in agreement. "She was. She loved what she did, she loved getting justice for her victims, she loved that she was actually making a difference in this city…" He reached into his pocket and pulled out his wallet again this time not getting out any money but pulling out a careworn well looked at photo and handed it to Olivia.

The picture showed Carrie looking up at the Statue of Liberty in a flowy white top and a pair of jean Capri's. Her long thick brown hair was pulled half up away from her smooth soft face and was whipping in the wind, she didn't wear a hint of makeup but she didn't need it. She had one of those faces that were stunningly gorgeous even without makeup. Her beaming smile reached her twinkling brown eyes.

"Carrie lived in New York for a while but hadn't really done any of the touristy stuff. So after we got back from our honeymoon, I took her to see all the tourist sites as a sort of second honeymoon," Tucker told her.

"She's beautiful," Olivia told him honestly as she looked over the photo before handing it back. "How long were you married?"

"Eight months. She wanted kids more than anything," he added as he took another long drink of bourbon, swaying slightly in his chair. "I wanted to wait a little bit. Ya know, have the whole honeymoon phase but she didn't wanna wait and I could never say no to her. Four months into the marriage she tells me she's two months pregnant… I just started crying I was so damn happy."

Olivia watched as Tucker looked down for a moment, tears welling in his eyes. "It was a little boy. We were gonna name him John after my father."

"Ed, I am SO sorry," said Olivia softly with all the sympathy she could muster. "I can't… even imagine going through all of that."

Tucker cleared his throat and quickly wiped away any tears that had built up while Olivia, graciously, pretended not to notice. "Thanks," he said before downing the rest of his drink and holding up his hand. "Let me get another one."

Olivia bit her lip as the bartender put another glass in front of him that he downed like a shot. "Ed, why don't we go back to my apartment? You can get some sleep, sober up before tomorrow…"

"I don't need to get sober," he answered. "I need to forget everything to do with Thomas Williams." He spat the name out like it was poison.

"You're drunk."

"That is usually how people forget things."

Before Olivia could answer Tuckers phone rang. He sighed as he pulled out his outdated iPhone and stared at the screen for a second. "I knew this was coming," he muttered before he answered it and put the phone to his ear. "Hey, Ma."

Olivia took a sip of her tea as she watched Tuckers brow furrow. "No I never sent cops to your place… No one told me about any kind of detail." He waited a moment, a furious look over taking his features. "What cops did you talk too, who told you they'd set up the detail?" Another moment. He turned and glowered at Olivia. "Uh huh. Look, Ma-… No I had no-… Calm down... Ma, calm-… Ma, stop crying, I'll be right there."

He hung up the phone and shoved it back into his pocket, still glaring at the SVU Sergeant with accusatory eyes. "What?" asked Olivia as Tucker got off the bar stool with a slight stumble. "Ed, what's wrong?"

"My mother asked Rollins and Amaro if someone from my squad could handle her protection detail since she's uncomfortable around cops," he spat as he wrenched on his jacket. "They just went ahead and assigned two random uni's without even talking to me."

Her mouth open and shut several times before she could find something to say. "Ed, I'm sure they didn't mean anything by it."

"Williams was in his uniform when he attacked my mother!" Tucker barked as he rounded on her, his blue eyes blazing with anger. "She just found out he's back in this city, she looks out her door and saw someone in uniform skulking around her yard! She almost had a heart attack, Olivia!"

Tucker stormed away from her but after a moment of shock she followed him. "I'll talk to them," she told him. "I'll get this settled, I promise."

"Fine then go talk to them."

"I'm coming with you first," she told him as they walked out into the night air.

"No you're not."

"Ed, please. Let me help you."

He scoffed as he held out a hand to hail a cab. "Oh now you wanna play the concerned girlfriend?"

Olivia blinked as a cab pulled up in front of them. "…This isn't about that. It's about helping a victim."

"You and your squad already helped enough."

"Ed-."

Tucker got into the taxi without even sparing a glance at her. "Leave me alone, Benson." And he was gone.

He hadn't called her 'Benson' when they were alone since before they started sleeping together. Only when they were surrounded by either her squad or his agents but the moment they were alone it was 'Olivia' or 'Liv'. A testament to how far they had come.

Hearing him bark her last name like that when they were alone like he used to hurt a lot more then she thought it would have…

Olivia swallowed hard as she stood on the sidewalk, a sudden chill creeping up on her. Her phone rang and she cleared her throat before she answered, not even bothering with the caller ID.

"Benson."

"Bears lost to the Chiefs 52-3," Voight's telltale voice came through the receiver with a slight playfulness. "Most savage beating I ever witnessed. Wanna come over to my hotel and stroke my ego and lick my wounds?"

Olivia smiled sadly at the phone. "Sorry, but I'm not really in the mood to stroke and lick anything."

"Well I could stroke and lick you…"

She chuckled humorlessly but didn't say anything else. After a few moments of silence Voight spoke, this time without the playfulness. "You alright?"

"No," she sighed, leaning against the brick building. "A victim was attacked by a cop in uniform so she wanted IAB to protect her, Amaro and Rollins ignored her wishes, got two unis for the job, the victim freaked out when she saw them and my… I don't even know what to call him, is pissed at me because of it."

"Your not boyfriend?"

Olivia nodded. "Yeah. The victim is his mother so I can't really blame him for being mad either but he hasn't been mad at me since he started being my not boyfriend."

She heard a slight rustling on a hotel bed. "Slap your kids wrist tomorrow, tell your not boyfriend accept that and get over it or get lost."

"Why is everything one extreme or the other with you?"

"Because you didn't make the call, your detectives did. This guy will either realize that and get over it or die with it."

"You have an uncanny ability to make every single situation purely black and white ya know that?"

"Call it a gift." Olivia chuckled and she could practically see the puppy dog smile on Voight's usually hard face. "So are you feeling better enough to come over?"

She bit her lip for a moment, letting a grin spread slowly on her lips. "I only have my nanny until ten," she warned.

"That's two hours. I think you know as well as I do what I can accomplish in two hours," he told her with that arrogance that would make her wanna slap anyone else. But with him she'd be lying if it wasn't a turn on.

A sly smile became painted on her face. "I'll be there in fifteen."

"I look forward to it. Bye, Benson."

"Bye, Voight." And with a beep, he was gone.

Olivia couldn't keep the smile off her face as she hailed a cab to his hotel room, her argument with her not boyfriend out of her mind…

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