Chapter 32: Guilt
Tigerclaw stopped, he and Dustpaw had finally reached the Thunderpath. He quickly located the area closest to the Thunderpath- an ash tree- where a cat could easily be run over.
"Go refresh those markers over there." Tigerclaw pointed to the farthest marker with his tail.
Dustpaw nodded eagerly, though at the same time trying to look calm and collected. He trotted off in the direction Tigerclaw had ordered him to go.
Okay now... Time to put this plan in action. Tigerclaw spotted a young rabbit hopping along the side of the Thunderpath, not noticing the cats nearby.
He fell into the hunter's crouch, balancing his weight evenly on all paws. I must not miss this catch!
He pounced, and the rabbit didn't even have time squeak before it was dead. The dark tabby hastily checked to see if Dustpaw had seen him. The brown tabby apprentice was still a way off, refreshing the scent markers.
The deputy rubbed the rabbit on one of the ShadowClan scent markers, until it's white fur smelled strongly of ShadowClan. Tigerclaw then proceeded to rip the rabbit apart, and buried some of the scraps to make it look like some cat had already eaten parts of it.
Tigerclaw placed the bones and scraps of rabbit meat near the burnt ash tree. All good, all in order...
He washed the prey's blood off his paws in a shallow and slightly brown puddle left from the rain a few nights before. Tigerclaw pushed some leaves and mud over it to cover up the now red-brown water.
He glanced to see where Dustpaw was. The apprentice was still refreshing the markers.
Tigerclaw promptly began to lick his paws, covering up any sign that he had caught the rabbit. Backing away from the remains, he refreshed a couple scent markers as well.
"Alright Tigerclaw, I'm done!" Dustpaw bounded up to him, tail flicking nervously.
"Good work." He purred in approval. "Now let's test you on your skills... Tell me, what do you smell?"
Dustpaw lifted his chin a little, and opened his mouth to taste the air. "Well, there's ShadowClan and ThunderClan scent of course." He began. "A monster passed this way recently, and..."
Dustpaw looked almost bewildered for a heartbeat, before his expression changed into shock. "Blood!"
Tigerclaw made himself stiffen, and trying to sound concerned asked, "Cat's blood?"
"Oh, no it's just... Rabbit blood. That's weird. Did some cat hunt around here?" Dustpaw asked, sounding puzzled. "We don't usually hunt around here because of the monsters..."
"You're right. Where is this rabbit?" Tigerclaw questioned him. Dustpaw paused, smelling the air. "It's coming from the burnt ash tree." The apprentice went over to it, and Tigerclaw followed.
"Careful don't get to close to the Thunderpath." He cautioned. Dustpaw nodded. "It's over here!" He announced.
Then he gasped. "That's ShadowClan scent!" He hissed furiously. Tigerclaw stepped forward. "What?!" He spat, in a convincing angry tone.
"Those filthy snake-hearts!" Dustpaw backed away for Tigerclaw to sniff the bones.
"ShadowClan, hunting on our territory! Will there be a battle?" The apprentice flexed his claws. "I'll shred them!"
"Go back to the camp and tell Bluestar I want to meet her at the ShadowClan border, at this burnt ash tree." Tigerclaw ordered. "I want her to see this for herself, and make sure she comes alone, this should only be between me and her. I won't take no for an answer."
Don't push it. Dustpaw just nodded determinedly. "You can count on me!" He sprinted off, tail lashing.
Tigerclaw waited a few more heartbeats, and was about to hide in some bushes some way off when the snap of twig and rustle of bush made him whip around.
It was Darkstripe, Longtail, and Willowpelt. "We bumped into Dustpaw, he told us what was going on." Willowpelt meowed. "Anything we can help with?"
Inwardly Tigerclaw groaned. Just go away, that would be good enough 'help'!
"Yes." He told them, thinking fast. "Go to.. Snakerocks. Check if ShadowClan is there, they caught the prey recently; they may be nearby."
Darkstripe nodded. Longtail waved his striped tail. "Or course Tigerclaw." Darkstripe led the way in the direction of Snakerocks, the rest of his patrol following.
Thank the Dark Forest. Tigerclaw made sure the patrol was a good way away from the Thunderpath, and slipped into the bushes he had chosen to hide in.
The time has come, my time for power, my first step to true leadership!
Finally, he heard soft paw steps.
Yes, yes let it happen! Tigerclaw couldn't see Bluestar from here, but he could imagine her wandering closer to the Thunderpath, wondering where her dear, loyal deputy was.
There was a rumble of an approaching monster, and then the roar grew louder as it raced across the Thunderpath. There was a flash of light from it's eyes, and then...
A high-pitched, ear-splitting shriek of agony pierced through the air, echoing through the forest. The noise of the monster faded away, not stopping to collect it's prey.
She's dead, she's dead! Leadership is mine! Tigerclaw felt triumph flood him. He padded slowly towards the grey shape laying huddled on the grass, red staining the ground around Bluestar, who was not moving.
Wait.
That's not right.
That shape is surely much to small to be a full grown cat like Bluestar... The nearer he got the more the fur seemed like a light grey, and not a darker blue-grey like Bluestar's pelt.
It can't be, that had to be Bluestar...!
Horror slammed into him. No! It was a mistake! I needed Bluestar dead! Not... Not...!
At his paws, scarlet blood seeping out from a terrible wound, was a small, light grey apprentice, trembling in pain.
Cinderpaw lay there at Tigerclaw's paws.
• • •
The sound pattering paws still didn't make Tigerclaw look up. He was frozen with shock, the mangled, bloody body of Cinderpaw was all he could see.
Suddenly, a flame-coloured tom came into Tigerclaw's view. Fireheart. The mentor sniffed at Cinderpaw, stretching out a wobbly forepaw.
Tigerclaw tried to pull himself together. Shaking over some random apprentice's death, what are you, some sappy StarClan warrior? Toughen up!
"She's alive." He growled stiffly, trying not to show how badly her accident had affected him. "What was she doing here?" I needed Bluestar, not her!
"She came to find you." Fireheart rasped.
What?! "You mean you sent her here?" Tigerclaw hissed. Fireheart looked horrified, and almost indignant. "I told her to stay in camp! She came by herself..."
And who wasn't strict enough to force her to stay in camp huh? This is your fault! Tigerclaw thought furiously.
A small part of him pricked with guilt. If you didn't ask for Bluestar to come, Cinderpaw wouldn't have died. A voice echoed in his head.
Shut up. "We must get her home." Tigerclaw muttered. He leaned forward to grasp the she-cat's scruff, but Fireheart instantly shot forward and gripped the grey fur gently, beginning to haul her back the way he came.
Tigerclaw looked back at the burnt ash tree one last time. The rabbit had been run over by the monster, squished into the grass and nearly completely covered up by Cinderpaw's blood.
Cinderpaw will be fine, stop acting like this. Some strong leader you'll make if you fall apart everytime a cat dies! Tigerclaw scolded himself harshly.
Tigerclaw followed Fireheart, who was still dragging the grey apprentice along. The bushes beside Tigerclaw gave a rustle, and Darkstripe stepped out.
"I've checked Snakerocks again Tigerclaw. There's no sign of Shadow-" Darkstripe stopped dead at the sight of Cinderpaw. "What happened?"
"Cinderpaw got hit by a monster. I was too late to call out to her." Tigerclaw growled gruffly. "Bring your patrol back to camp once you've caught enough prey."
Darkstripe nodded, and turned away to get back to his patrol.
Tigerclaw lengthened his stride and overtook Fireheart. "Take your time with bringing Cinderpaw over. I'll go on ahead."
Fireheart didn't reply, but Tigerclaw didn't wait for an answer. He took off, leaving the injured apprentice and her mentor behind.
• • •
"Tigerclaw, you're back! Are we going to fight ShadowClan? I've trained, could I go?" Dustpaw asked, eyes shining with longing.
Tigerclaw ignored his questions. "Where's Bluestar? Why didn't she come?" He asked fiercely. Dustpaw flicked his tail. "Apparently her Whitecough developed into Greencough while we were out. Fireheart was gonna go see you instead. Are we going to fi-"
Tigerclaw left the apprentice mid-sentence. "Yellowfang!" He called. The flat-muzzled medicine cat looked up from her sorting of herbs. "Yes?" She meowed.
"First of all, how's Bluestar?" Yellowfang looked defeated and anxious. "She's in the paws of StarClan now, I've done all I've can. Hopefully with the catmint I've given her she'll recover soon, without losing a life."
Tigerclaw flicked his tail in understanding. "Secondly, Cinderpaw has gotten seriously injured." He growled.
Yellowfang's eyes widened in a worried horror. She sprang to her paws, "Where is she? How badly? How did she get hurt?"
"Fireheart is bringing her over. She went to close to the Thunderpath, Fireheart couldn't make her listen to him." He spat. "She got run over by a monster, but she's still alive."
Yellowfang nodded, shock wearing off. "I'll get a nest and some herbs ready for her." She meowed, and disappeared quickly into her den.
Tigerclaw saw Fireheart come into the camp. Yellowfang, spotting them, quickly hurried over.
Soon Cinderpaw was inside, Yellowfang and Fireheart whispering quietly to one another. Tigerclaw remained outside of the entrance of the medicine cat den, head held high. I am not going to show weakness just because an apprentice got injured.
Cinderpaw ruined your plan! If Bluestar had come you would be leader now! Tigerclaw snarled in his head. Your pathway to power was clear, but no...!
Still, unwanted voices full of accusation whispered in his head.
It was Greencough's fault...
It was Bluestar's fault for being so weak she couldn't fight sickness! I'd be a better leader!
Your selfish plan has scarred an apprentice that would've been a valued warrior...
It wasn't my fault! Fireheart needs to be a better mentor, he needs to know how to control his apprentice. Trust a kittypet to ruin everything, Fireheart is to blame!
Tigerclaw continued to hold his head high as if this didn't matter to him, despite the raging battle he needed to win inside his head.
• • •
"Then I want a hole to be scraped out where we can store prey. Use snow to line it, and cover it with more snow once it has been filled. We may as well make use of the snow while it's here." Tigerclaw ordered.
It had finally snowed, Leafbare upon them. The season meant hunger, sickness, and the clan was vulnerable, but Tigerclaw was determined not to show any weakness.
"Mousefur, Longtail!" Tigerclaw called to the two warriors. "Organize some hunting parties. We need as much fresh-kill as we can get before the prey takes to their burrows for good!"
He spotted Fireheart gazing at the snow in wonder, picking up his paws higher than usual, flicking the snow off his feet every now and then. Does the kittypet not know what snow is? Was te twoleg toy shut up in his warm kittypet home when the snow came, too cold for the kittypet's soft paws? Tigerclaw mocked in his head.
The ginger tom passed by Tigerclaw, and he couldn't help sneering at him. "Fireheart, wait. Oh, I suppose you'll have to rest. I can't imagine you'll be any use on a hunting party this morning."
Fireheart's eyes flashed with a bitter annoyance. "I'm going to see how Cinderpaw is first."
Tigerclaw ignored the prick of guilt when the ginger warrior mentioned Cjnderpaw. Suddenly, Tigerclaw remembered Fireheart had been sitting with Bluestar the whole night. Did she lose a life? Does she still have her four lives? "How's Bluestar?" He asked.
Fireheart hesitated, Tigerclaw could almost see his mind working quickly in his green eyes.
"I'm no medicine cat." Fireheart answered at last. "I can't say."
Tigerclaw snorted. Trust a kittypet to not even know whether their leader lost a life or not.
"Whitestorm, Willowpelt," Tigerclaw turned away from Fireheart. "Lead a border patrol, you two can decide who will go to your patrol. Whitestorm, go to the RiverClan border, Willowpelt, go to the ShadowClan border."
Tigerclaw watched satisfyingly as the warriors followed out his orders, a comforting sense of power and control flooding him.
• • •
"... So yes, the ShadowClan border is fine, though we should be cautious about the scents that are inching closer." Willowpelt finished. Tigerclaw nodded approvingly. "You may take your patrol and go rest."
When his clanmates headed away, he turned to Whitestorm and his patrol. "Anything new with RiverClan? They seem to be especially close nowadays." He growled.
"RiverClan had been scented nearer to our camp, but haven't seen any cat." Whitestorm reported. "We refreshed the scent markers in more places than usual as well. Hopefully they will go away, though I wouldn't recommend apprentice's going there alone. Speaking of apprentices..."
The tabby tom pricked up his ears. "I had to take Brackenpaw out on my patrol because he was wandering around, he had nothing to do."
Brackenpaw's mentor is not at camp?
Tigerclaw licked his paw and drew it over his ear. "Alright, thanks for telling me. You may go relax as well."
Whitestorm and his patrol disintegrated, leaving Tigerclaw alone.
"Tigerclaw, have you seen Greystripe?"
The dark tabby looked around to see Yellowfang trotting quickly over to him.
"No." He answered. So Greystripe really isn't here...
Yellowfang flicked her tail in agitation. "He's supposed to be resting, he only has a cold right now but it could turn into Whitecough, and then Greencough. He might spread sickness too."
And that will make us weak. Tigerclaw nodded. "I'll ask Fireheart if he knows where his friend keeps going off to." He growled.
Yellowfang nodded. "Thanks." She turned and headed swiftly back to the medicine den.
"Oh, Yellowfang!" Tigerclaw called after her. I must know!
"Yes?" The long-furred she-cat turned her head to look at him. Tigerclaw caught up to her. "How's Bluestar?" He whispered.
Yellowfang's amber eyes flashed. "I'm afraid... That she lost another life. The Greencough had left her, but she is still weak. I must check on Cinderpaw now."
The medicine cat bounded off, slipping into her den.
Tigerclaw set off to look for Fireheart. After a while of searching, it was clear that he wasn't in the camp. So Greystripe and Fireheart have gone off. What are they planning, the two meddlesome kits?
"Tigerclaw, Tigerclaw!"
Ugh, what?
Goldenflower was hurrying towards him, eyes shining with happiness. "I'm having your kits!" She exclaimed. "I'm sure they're yours this time." She added, purring.
Tigerclaw forced an awkward smile. "That's great." He tried to purr, but it sounded like he was choking on rocks so he stopped trying.
"You should rest in the nursery, I want you to be healthy, and I want our-"
Our...
"-kits to be healthy too." Tigerclaw finished. Goldenflower sighed. "I don't want to be cooped up in a den all day though!"
"It will be worth it." Tigerclaw assured her, licking the top of her head. His mate-
Mate...
His mate agreed with a enthusiastic wave of her tail. "Well, I guess I should head back into my nest in the nursery. Love you."
"L-Love you too." Tigerclaw watched as she padded away, noticing that her belly was rounder than usual.
Kits... I'll be a father...
Stop it. You must make sure she and the kits are healthy, you must train them to be strong, and to know the way of power.
• • •
Fireheart walked into camp, a bundle of catmint in his jaws.
Tigerclaw went up to him, eyes narrowed. "More catmint? I wondered where you'd gone. Brackenpaw can take that to Yellowfang."
Brackenpaw was kicking away some snow, helping to clear it away. Seeing the apprentice also reminded of of Brackenpaw's missing mentor.
"Come and take this catmint to Yellowfang." Tigerclaw meowed to the apprentice. He flicked his ear, a fleck of snow dislodged from it, and grasped the herbs Fireheart had set down; heading off to the medicine den.
"I wanted to visit Cinderpaw." Fireheart mewed, sounding a little cross. Tigerclaw ignored the pang of culpability once more.
"Later." He growled. "I want to know where Graystripe has been going."
Tigerclaw saw a guarded sort of look come over Fireheart. "I don't know." He replied evenly.
Stupid kittypet! I know that you know where Greystripe is! "When you see him,you can tell him he's confined to the fallen oak." Tigerclaw spat. "Cats with whitecough are confined there until they are well again."
"But Graystripe only has a cold." Fireheart argued.
"A cold is bad enough. He'll stay at the fallen oak!" Tigerclaw repeated. "Cats with greencough are to nest with Yellowfang. We must stop this sickness from spreading."
He will spread sickness, get other cats sick, and eventually our clan will be weak...
"It is for the good of the Clan." Tigerclaw added, narrowing his eyes.
"Yes, Tigerclaw." Fireheart murmured. "I'll tell Graystripe.
"And keep away from Bluestar." The deputy added. Fireheart flicked his ear in annoyance. "But the greencough has left her." He objected.
"I am aware of that, but her den still reeks of the sickness." Tigerclaw spat. "I can't afford to have any of my warriors falling ill."
Fireheart looked irritated when he said, 'my warriors', but Tigerclaw didn't react to it.
"Whitestorm tells me that RiverClan warriors have been scented even closer to the camp." Tigerclaw growled with an edge to his voice. Anything to do with you, Fireheart? he asked suspiciously once more in his head. "He also told me he had to train Brackenpaw today. I expect you to take charge of Brackenpaw's training tomorrow."
Fireheart nodded, looking slightly ashamed. "May I go and see Cinderpaw now?"
Tigerclaw shot a fierce look at him. I just told you not to go near the sick cats!
Fireheart seemed to know what he was thinking. "I doubt if Yellowfang has put her anywhere near the cats with greencough. I won't get infected."
Ugh. Fine. "Very well." Tigerclaw turned and marched angrily away.
• • •
Tigerclaw found he was in the Place of No Stars once more. He had fallen asleep in his nest, hoping to find he would wake here.
"So!"
Tigerclaw whipped around. "Who's there?" He hissed.
Mapleshade stepped out, yellow eyes blazing. "You failed Tigerclaw! You didn't kill Bluestar!" She snarled.
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