Something New
Kuvira woke up from the blanket and pillow pallet on the floor. Lin and Kya had stayed over last night after dinner. Yesterday was a long stressful day for all of them. After everyone had shared their day with each other. It was clear that none of them wanted to part from each other so they decided on a family sleep over.
Asami had been told to sleep on the couch. Kya had let her know that her leg cold possible be in a lot of pain in the morning. She had huffed and insisted that she was missing out on the family cuddle pile and she made it known that she was not happy about it by pouting until it was time for bed. She gently moved Kya's arms from around her waist and sat up. Kya protested but rolled over and cuddled into Korra.
Kuvira smiled shaking her head fondly as she up. Naga looked up from where she was looking outside the window. "Hey there girl." She greeted the animal with a kiss to the snout. "Want to go get something to eat and make sure you have fresh water?"
Naga nudged her with her nose before she stood up. Kuvira smiled and opened the sliding door. Naga jumped through the door and stretched. She took a deep breath and huffed wagging her tail at the almost visible white pufs of air.
Kuvira chuckled. "It is pretty cold out her girl. Maybe I should open with fire bending this morning. What do you think?" She asked twirling in front of her. She walked backwards until she was a good feet from the house and her pet. Naga sat down and her tail thumped against the ground. The bender smirked. "That's a good an answer as any."
She took deep breath and planted her feet wide. She raised her fist from her sides into the air slowly. Lava pooled at her at her glowing feet. A round house kick started it off. Then she went flying in the air body spinning with the flowing lava. Her kicks and punches were just as power as the element that flowed with them. She flipped backwards on one hand. The other one was used to send lava flying into the air in her upside down state. A low sweeping kick on the ground cooled the lava.
She finished the turn and pulled up into an earth bending stance. The ground rumbled as pillars rose up and she propelled herself up onto one. Earth bending was more than just throwing huge chucks of earth around. Earth could move as fluidly as water if your movements were right. Her arms rapidly swaying with her body as the pillars curved, looped, and bended. She jumped from pillar to pillar before collapsing them all and settling the earth as if she was never there.
The platinum seeped off her wrist as she formed a water bending stance. She could see Naga move with excitement from her new bending choice. She sighed contently remembering her mother's steps that she mimicked. A warm smile appeared as she closed her eyes and her heartbeat calmed. Memories were such a wonderful painful thing. She could almost hear her parents and grandparents voices. Her their laughter, banter, the lectures, the nagging-
A bark from Naga broke her thoughts.
She opened her eyes with a gasp. She was floating in the air and Naga was looking up at her. She lowered herself back down. "Sorry girl." Naga only huffed and waited for her to keep going. Kuvira wiped her eyes and whispered words to her family that was now gone.
Her body glowed once more and she hummed with the spirit energy that filled her. Her air bending movements were loose and strong like they should be. This time however she kept her eyes on Naga and finished out her bending forms. Naga trotted her way over and brushed against her side.
"You know sometimes it would be wonderful to be able to hear you talk." Kuvira commented as they made their way to Naga's house. "I think it would make dark moments a whole lot better."
Lin woke with a yawn. She took in her surroundings as she sat up and rubbed her eye. Kuvira had went outside to do her bending. Her girlfriend was asleep on Korra's stomach. She smiled and turned to check on Asami. Her smiled slipped and was replaced with a frown. Asami was whimpering in her sleep. She got up quickly kicking the cover away and made her way over. She tried shushing her but it didn't work.
"Mom." Asami whimpered leaning into Lin's touches.
Lin's heart broke a little as she bite her lip. "Asami honey wake up." Lin said kissing her forehead. "Come on IE it's just a nightmare." Asami whimpered as she woke up. The tears that had been pooling in her eyes rolled down her cheeks. "Hey." Lin said softly.
Asami turned her head away and sniffed. Lin was having none of that and cupped her cheek. She gently turned her head back. "Sweetheart please don't turn away from me."
Asami bit her lip and her eyes slowly shut close. "My leg really hurts."
Lin glanced down. "I would give you more medicine but Kya has set a time period for your medicine but I can massage it if you want."
Asami nodded and Lin smiled kissing her forehead again. As gently as she could she massaged the sore muscle. Asami grunted and whimpered at first but slowly released a breath. It was painfully pleasant.
"So um..." Lin started not knowing how to say this but was curious. "You called out for your mother."
Asami didn't say anything as she looked at the back of the couch. Her teeth did grind together loud enough that she knew Lin would hear. "I'm always calling out for a dead woman as if I'm some sort of child."
Lin frowned at the harshness of those words. She stopped her movement and reclaimed her seat on the edge of the couch by Asami's top half. "Talk to me. What was that dream about?" She raised a hand to cut off whatever Asami was going to retort. "Don't even bother lying to me. I love you Asami and I just want to be here for you. I almost killed that guy for being behind your attack." Lin said gently stroking her cheek because Asami was now crying again.
"I love you to." Asami said balling her hand up in the front Lin's shirt. She took a few deep breathes calming herself. "The dream was about yesterday except it was only me at the house. Kuvira wasn't there to come to my rescue. After they broke my leg. I was pinned to the ground and my mother was brought out of the house. Thankfully I woke up before I had to watch her die again." She finished in a whispered and wrapped in Lin's arms.
Lin didn't say anything else and motioned for her to lean up. Asami didn't question her as she settled against her. "How about we get a few more hours of sleep? There's no reason for us to be up right now." Lin said gently rubbing side. Asami nodded and closed her eyes again. She would rather be sleep again if her leg started to hurt.
Kya woke up and smiled at the scene she saw. Asami was sleep on Lin's chest. She looked a bit uncomfortable but she was sleeping soundly. Untangling herself from her tiger seal she got out Asami's medicine out. She figured the engineer would be in pain. Kya brushed hair out of the younger woman's face and kissed her forehead.
Asami groaned as she woke up. "Kya?" She asked opening her eyes. Kya smiled softly sweeping hair behind her ear. "Hey mío." She said. "I'm going to give you some medicine ok? It should take care of the pain until you get a healing session a little later."
"Ok." Asami yawned rubbing her eye.
"Lin is really comfy isn't she?" Kya asked handing her the medicine and glass of water.
"Yeah." Asami said taking her medicine. "I had a nightmare and she helped."
"Well I'm happy to hear that. I would have helped to if I had heard you." Kya assured her.
Asami smiled grabbing her hand and squeezing it. "It's ok Kya. The two of you have helped me more than I'm sure you are aware of." She told her.
The Sato's residence was buzzing with laughter and loud talking filling the house up from the kitchen. They were all seated at the table talking. Some life had returned to Asami since the medicine had started kicking in. Kuvira and Naga had long since rejoined their family inside. Lin had told Kya about Asami's dream when Korra took her to the bathroom. The water tribe princess had instructions to give her a healing session while they were in there.
Lin loved to see the way Kya attacked with their girls. It's like her eyes become more alive and she breathed easier when she laid eyes on them. Kya loved the way Lin attacked around their girls. She was so loving and caring. She never thought Lin would get the chance to be a mother but seeing this makes her love their family even more.
"So is there something you three want to tell us?" Lin asked smirking.
Korra had her head resting on Kuvira's shoulder as she sipped her tea with an easy smile. Kuvira couldn't stop smiling if she tried. The two older woman had watched her look at Asami with heart eyes while the two talked about the type of metals Kuvira could bend. Asami had an arm laying across Kuvira's shoulders. She would alternate from running her fingers through the hairs at Kuvira's nape to Korra's head without much thought.
"What do you mean?" Asami asked confused.
Kya rolled her eyes. "IE you're adorable but you're too smart to be playing dumb."
Asami chuckled dropping her act and shrugging. "We didn't know how to tell you guys so, we decided to see how long it would take for you to notice."
"We bet on it actually." Korra said setting her cup down.
"And I won actually." Kuvira said smugly. "My parents are too smart for them to take forever to figure this out."
"We've actually been waiting for a while." Kya said shrugging.
"You guys just took forever to figure out
that you're meant to be together." Lin said laughing.
"It was really quite painful to watch." Kya said.
"Is that so?" Asami asked raising an eyebrow.
"Very much so our little genius." Kya teased. Asami blushed and looked away. "We're really happy for the three of you. We love you and just want you to be happy. We think of all of you as our girls."
"That is if you're ok with that." Lin said letting her eyes dance from Korra to Asami.
"Of course I am. You guys already know I told my parents." Korra sat up so quickly assure them. "I love you guys as much as I love my own parents." They smiled at her and turned to Asami who had yet to say anything.
They knew that this was a sensitive subject for her as much as it is for Kuvira. Asami tried not to cry but she couldn't hold the tears back any longer. "Sorry I can't help it." She said standing up. They stood up to and pulled her into their arms.
"It's ok IE we understand." Kya said kissing her temple.
"We just wanted you to know that we thought of you as our daughter." Lin said rubbing her back and kissing her head.
That got Asami to cry a little harder and a jumbled up. "I love you." Was heard after the younger woman buried her face in Lin's neck. Kya smiled at her girlfriend as she hugged Asami from behind and kissed her head again.
"You guys can have that guest bedroom if you want." Asami said coming up behind Lin. Kya had already went up to take a shower. "You guys can make it your home away from home. Plus it's soundproof." She said winking at Lin as she handed her warm towels and rags.
Lin laughed shaking her head as she took the items. "You are something else sweetie. I'm sure Kya will be happy to hear that." Lin said squeezing her nape and kissing her forehead. Asami preened and left her to it.
Lin hummed to herself as she walked up the stairs to the room they were given. After closing and locking the door she made her way to the bathroom where her girlfriend was waiting on her. Kya was singing to herself as she washed off her face wash.
"Hey love." Kya said from where she stood completely naked in front of the sink.
Lin returned her smile as she placed the towels and rags down. She looked over the older woman and was still at a loss at how she got so lucky. Kya was... Kya. She sighed contently still watching her. Her partner in this world. The mother to her children. Kya smiled leaning back on Lin when the younger wrapped her arms around her.
"I love you so much." Lin said peppering kisses along her neck.
Kya giggled. "I love you to."
Lin smirked nipping at the back of Kya's nape grinding her hips into her. Her nails dug into small hips and the moan Kya let lose had her digging in a little harder. She trailed her way down Kya's spin stopping at different spots to leave a mark. Kya groaned arching as Lin made it to her lower back. She leaned over the sink to give Lin as much room as she could. Lin moaned spreading Kya's cheeks and the woman's glistening folds came in to view.
"Watashi no kodomo-tachi no hahaoya wa totemo sekushīdesu." (The mother of my kids is so fucking sexy.) She moaned.
"Bebé qué?" (Baby what-). Kya gasped but it turned into a loud moan as Lin's tongue moved through her folds and flexed inside of her. "Mamí por favor." (Mamí please.)
"Shh hasshumamī." (Shh hush mommy.) Lin said nudging her thighs apart a little more. She got back to work and listened as Kya whimpered over the sink. Kya moaned around the fingers in her mouth. "Akachan wa anata ni kikoete kudasai." (Baby please let me hear you.) Lin begged replacing her mouth with her fingers.
She took Kya's hand from her mouth and threaded their fingers together. Kya arched back against her rocking into Lin's fingers that still filled her. "Kanpekina akachan." (So perfect baby.) Lin moaned looking in the mirror.
Kya had her eyes closed, head titled back, moaning and groaning, hand playing with her nipple, and Lin's name was falling from her lips. "Totemo utsukushī." (So beautiful.) Lin said taking her jaw and redirecting her to the mirror. "Anata no me no akachan o hiraki, anata ga dorehodo subarashī ka o mite kudasai." (Open your eyes baby and see how amazing you are.)
Kya whimpered opening her eyes. She moaned louder trailing her eyes over them before finding Lin's in the mirror. Lin slipped her fingers into her mouth and twisted the three fingers she had buried in her. "Anata wa kesa kodomo-tachi to totemo sutekideshita." (You were so wonderful with our kids this morning.) She whispered into her ear. "Anata wa, watashi ga anata o mimamoru yō ni watashi o totemo muchū ni sa semasu. Karera wa tōsho kara watashitachi no yōdatta. Supirittsu watashi wa anata to kekkon suru no o matsu koto ga dekinainode, daremoga anata ga kōzandeari, watashi wa anatadearu koto o shirudeshou. Dakara, anata wa subarashī ningen to aisuru hahaoya o miru koto ga dekimasu. Dakara karera wa, watashitachi ga otagai ni dono yō ni kanpekidearu ka o miru." (You just drive me so crazy with the way you look after them. As if they were ours from the start. Spirits I can't wait to marry you so everyone will know you are mines and I yours. So ever one can see the wonderful person and loving mother you are. So they can see how perfect we are for each other.) Lin pushed her fingers in a little harder and quicker feeling Kya tighten around her. "Watashi wa, anata o aishiteimasu." (I love you.)
Kya cam undone around both of Lin's hands. Lin let her go and brace herself against the sink. She made good work of the separation and gathered up the metal in plain sight. She gently picked up her girlfriend and kissed her as she made her way over to the toilet. Sitting down she had Kya straddle her lap.
"Mamí quítate la ropa." (Mamí clothes off.) Kya said pawing at her shirt as they kissed. Lin only grabbed and pulled her closer by hand full of her ass. Kya moaned looking down between them as Lin continued to grind them together. "Mierda mamí." (Fuck mamí.) Kya moaned looking at the metal. "Eso es hacer trampa." (That's cheating.)
Lin chuckled. "Kanojo ga aishite iru monode watashi no gārufurendo to koi o shitai to omotte iru no wa fuseidesu ka?." (It's cheating to want to make love to my girlfriend with something she loves?) Kya whimpered as Lin leaned her to the side by picking up a thigh. "Anata ga watashi no tame ni dono yō ni nurete junbi ga dekite sanshō shite kudasai." (See how wet and ready you are for me baby.) She pushed up into her in one stroke. "Dō yatte watashi o tsurete itta no ka mite mimashou ka?" (See how you took me in one go?) She whispered lowering her back down to her lap.
Kya moaned slowly rocking her hips. Lin kissed her grabbing her ass again as they began to move together. She moved down to her neck so she could look into the mirror more. The bathroom echoed with their bodies slapping together. Kya leaned back on Lin's thighs to move better. "Sore wa yoi kenkaidattaga, koreha yoriyoi aidesu." (That was a good view but this one is better love.) Lin said in awe as she stroked Kya's clit. Kya jerked slowing down. "Īe, akachan wa tsudzukanai." (No no baby keep going.) Lin said taking her hip with her other hand and moving her faster.
Kya whimpered as she picked up speed. Por favor. "Por favor mamí." (Please Mamí.) She begged.
"Anata wa chōdo sonoyōni kite hoshī." (Shh baby I want you to come just like that.) Lin said never taking her eyes off the metal disappearing into her lover. Kya moaned throwing her head back as she came. Lin watched never wanting to miss a second. She pulled the older woman closer. "Watashi wa anata to yatte inai." (I'm not done with you.) Kya moaned as she kissed her.
"So Asami do you think you're feeling well enough to go to work today?" Korra asked worried.
"Yeah you are in charge so I'm sure you can get away with missing a day." Kuvira said from where she leaned against the wall.
Asami finished buttoning up her shirt and turned to face her girlfriends amused. "I already missed yesterday and I'm not going to miss today." She said ending it with a raised eyebrow. Korra huffed irritated and Kuvira sighed shaking her head. "Yes I was attacked yesterday and no attentions of making myself look weak. If cabbage corp had anything to do with this attack I will make it known. The press can have a field day and people won't want to do business with a corrupt business. My father should have been example of this enough."
"You want to make yourself look as innocent as possible." Kuvira said nodding along. "People already know that you're apart of team avatar and that you helped during the attack on the city."
"I see where you're going with this. You don't attack someone who is on the side of the people. Cabbage Corp has done nothing special since the attack but lower their prices." Korra said.
"Right so there is no way the media can spin it and say that there was any bad blood between us. I've done nothing to provoke the attack besides damage a man's go." Asami said applying her lipstick.
"What time is your press conference? Korra asked.
"Two thirty." Asami told her as they made their way to the door.
"I'll try to be in the area but if not keep each other safe." Korra said kissing them both on the cheek.
"We will but you be careful as well." Kuvira told her pulling her in for a tight hug.
"I will." Korra assured her returning the hug.
"Tell Raiko to watch his back as well. If he's on our side but playing the middle man by show then things can get messy for him." Asami said. She had a bad feeling after what Korra told them what happened at his office and the spirit portal.
"Any word from Raava or Mivaa yet?" Kuvira questioned.
"No." Korra said coming to stand next to Kya and Lin.
"Are you worried?" Kya asked.
"Like you have no idea." Korra said shaking her head and running a hand through her hair. "I try not to think about it though or else I would be in the spirit world looking for them."
Kuvira nodded. "I plan on going to the spirit world today anyway and check everything out. Do my usual rounds." She said.
"Be careful." The rest of the woman in the room said.
Kuvira smiled. "Don't worry I will. If I find myself in any danger then I'll leave as quickly as I came." She told them.
"We're still going to worry badgermole." Lin said petting Naga goodbye before they went to the garage.
"I know I know." Kuvira said following Asami to the car that she wanted to drive.
Everyone said their goodbyes again and got in their separate cars. Korra with Kya and Lin and Kuvira with Asami.
Korra hummed as she rode the elevator up to Raiko's office. Lin was on her way to the station and Kya was at the hospital. She bowed to the guards and knocked before walking in. She bowed to the man behind the desk and he stood up to return it. Something flew out of the corner of her eye and then landed on her shoulder with a chirp. Ai the male with the wings nuzzled her cheek and the wingless female Boa started to climb up her legs.
"Hey guys you two have gotten pretty big and you're flying." She said holding Boa to her chest and petting Ai.
"Yeah I know they are adorable trouble makers." Raiko said looking at them fondly as Korra took a seat.
Korra snapped a few pictures really quickly before putting her phone away. "So tell me what happened at the spirit portal? He called me this morning to tell me that he was pulling out of the Amusement Park idea but that he still had a few ideas under his sleeve." Korra sighed before she told what had happened. The whole spirits curse really bothered her she was going to have to go to the spirit world and ask about it.
"Well now he's more of an enemy than he was before." Raiko said shaking his head.
"Yeah and now I'll have to keep an eye on the spirits and the spirit world even more. Raava said that she talked to the gate keepers to keep humans out of the spirit world but I'm not sure if he counts as human anymore." Korra said.
"If anything else happens on my end team avatar will be the first to know I assure you. I want this to end as much as you guys do. Peace for Republic City seems like such a foreign thing for us now." He said looking out one of his windows. "It's like a wars going on and everyone has the same sides except us. Human or spirits and they can't see like us. If they could then they would know that there is nothing wrong with balance. Never has been and never will be. Somethings just don't get through though when you're power hungry."
"Chief." Mako and Bolin bowed as they walked into her office.
Lin was doing paperwork and so she glanced up at them. "Mako, Bolin." She said nodding to them.
"So we had an idea to go talk to someone who might know about the gangs." Mako said.
"Well he can have heard something since he's on the streets and people like to talk to him." Bolin said waving his hands around.
"And who are you referring to?" Lin asked tapping her pen against the desk.
"Skoochy of course." Bolin said with a shrug.
"He's the only one that's possibly not scared to talk to us." Mako told her. "The one thing is that it's going to be hard to find him because he lives on the streets."
"Uh he hops from place to place." Bolin said correcting his brother.
Mako rolled his eyes. "He's basically homeless." He said shrugging.
"Alright." Lin said holding up her hand to silence them. "If you can find him then talk to him but be careful. Make sure you talk to him in a secure place. And when your done make sure to keep an eye on him. With this new leadership going on then I don't think they're going to keep a friendly person around for long. Bring him in if you have to. He may already have a target on his back and he doesn't need a bigger one because we talked to him."
"Yes chief." They both said bowing. She waved them out of her office and got back to her pile of paperwork.
Kya hummed as she took off her dirty scrubs and tied her hair up. A knock to her changing room door.
"Kya?" Someone said.
"Yes?" She called slipping on a new top.
"The director would like to speak to you as soon as you are done."
"Ok thank you." She called again pulling up her bottoms.
Once she but her shoes back on the exited the changing room and threw her bagged clothes down the shoot. She smiled at the nurses, doctors, and patients she passed as she made her way to the hospitals directors' office. She knocked before she entered.
"Kya." The Director said bowing before taking his seat.
"Director." Kya said returning the bow.
"Thank you for another successful surgery." He said motioning for her to take a seat.
Kya sighed pulling out her seat and flopping into it. "It didn't feel so successful. I wasn't able to reattach the arm. The cells weren't attaching. He wasn't so happy when he woke up but his mother reminded him to be happy that he was alive."
"I see but still it was successful in a different way." He said smiling at her. "I called you in here to see if you've thought about my offer any at all?"
Kya nodded sitting up. "I have thought about it and talked about it with my girlfriend."
"Chief Lin." The Director said smiling and Kya returned it smiling. "You to make such a lovely couple."
"Thank you I'll be sure to let her know when I bring her lunch." She said. "But yes I have thought about it. I know that you said you're not hiring me because of my mother."
"Yes I did not ask you to join my hospital because of her accomplishments." He spoke. "I asked you because of who you are and you're accomplishments. You have made quite the name for yourself around the world on your travels. We need a master such as yourself on our staff team. Like I said in the email. I 'm not going to place you in a section. You're skills are not limited so you may float around different sections but you as well as are top master healers will receive emergency calls for surges and ER help. The only thing that you will be expected to do is rotate the ER with the other healers."
Kya nodded along. "And the issue of pay?"
"I'm willing to give you a more than generous salary if you want." The Director said seriously.
Kya laughed and the Director frowned confused. "I don't expect a huge salary. Money isn't really a problem for me so something enough to spoil my girlfriend and family would be enough for me." She saved waving him off.
"If I may ask." The Director said gesturing at her and she nodded. "Why did you take so long to make a decision if here is no problem with your job requirements or pay?"
"I'm sure you already know that I'm a wandering soul and I don't stay too long in one place. However because of my relationship I found myself here for a while. Don't get me wrong I have no problem with that and thank the spirits that I have found a reason to stay after all these years. But when we do start to travel again I don't know how long I will be gone." Kya said hoping he would understand. She was very thankful to have been offered this job and so she just didn't want to up and leave the hospital hanging.
The Director smiled warmly at her. "Do not worry about that. You are a special case and I can vouch for the entire hospital when I say this but we are very happy that you're even helping out as much as you have. You may leave at any time that you are ready. I would just like for a heads up." He told her and Kya returned his smile. "I know that you are very clothes to the Avatar group so I'm guessing city, the world, and Spirit World threats are something that will cause you to have to be on leave for emergencies."
Kya chuckled. "Yes that is most likely a huge possible with anyone of the avatar Anng's kids and even more when they happen to look after the new avatar."
The Director laughed as well. "Then you will be excused and the hospital will see you back when you're ready." They both stood up and shook hands.
"Well it looks like you have a new employee." Kya said as they let go of each other's hands.
"Welcome aboard it is a great honor to have you." The Director said bowing with a bright smile.
"Please take care of me." Kya said bowing.
Kuvira giggled as Asami trailed kisses down her jaw. "Asami I really have to go." She said leaning to give her more access to her neck.
Asami hummed in approval and nipped at her neck. "You should have thought of that before you decided to kiss me knowing I can't resist." She said holding her closer in her lap.
Kuvira leaned back and ran a hand through Asami's hair. "Oh so it's my fault now that you can't control yourself." She asked raising an eyebrow.
"Yes." The CEO said not even needing to think about it. Kuvira laughed at her serious face it was too cute. Asami stared fondly at the earth princess in her lap. Asami cupped her cheek and kissed her one more time. "Go before I keep you here with me all day." She whispered against her lips.
Kuvira's eyes glowed as she smirked down at one of the woman she gave her heart to. Asami's stomach did a little flip like it does every time Korra or Kuvira look at her that way. "You should really make a threat that doesn't sound so appealing baby." She said stroking her cheek with her thumb. "I'll see you later when it's time for your press conference. Just be careful and watch your back until someone from our family is at your side again."
"Yes ma'am." Asami said with a teasing smile causing Kuvira to roll her eyes.
Yama knocked before she entered Asami's office. "Oh!" She said hurriedly looking away and stopping in her tracks. "I didn't realize you had company Asami."
Asami looked on assumed at her secretary. She propped her head up on her fist. "Like you allow me to have any company." Yama looked back and glared at her. Asami gave her a friendly smile and Kuvira shook her head.
"It's ok Yama I was just leaving. See you guys later." Kuvira said glowing and then she was gone from the room.
Yama shook her head. "I don't even want to know." She said walking over to Asami's desk. "I came to see if you need help with anything."
Asami looked her over for a moment as the woman looked over the works on her desk. She watched the way Yama hummed to herself. She smiled softly knowing that she was not wrong in her decision.
Notes: Hi guys I'm back. I want to tell you I'm sorry for the long wait. I got stuck in one of depressed states and couldn't bring myself to write.