Chapter Twenty Six

A/N: No reviewers.

Merida sat on the steps at the head of the Great Hall, staring blankly at the jewels recording the house points. Each jewel represented the beaming smile of the student who had won it, bursting with pride at having furthered the chances of their House. It all seemed so silly, in the light of what had happened that night.

She had been so sure of herself, so sure that her intervention would have made a difference. The corpse laid out at the base of the Astronomy Tower said otherwise. Professor Dumbledore seemed so much smaller when dead, so much less of the formidable figure he had been when he had lived. It made the world feel so much more dangerous, knowing the wizard was no longer there to protect them.

It seemed so wrong, that the mighty Albus Dumbledore had been killed by one of his own professors, disarmed by a child, one of his own students. It seemed even more wrong that that child was Draco.

Merida had never thought he would do it. Something deep in her heart had reassured her that he would find a way to avoid doing the awful deed. Love had a way of making people believe their beloveds could achieve the impossible.

'He didn't have a choice.' she reminded herself, the same words she had thought a thousand times since the previous night. 'The Dark Lord didn't give him a choice. It was Dumbledore's death or his. What sixteen year old would be able to make that choice?'

But the more times she thought about it, imagining the body of the great wizard Draco's choice had doomed, the less she believed it was true. Harry could have made such a choice. Ron could, Hermione could, Ginny could. She could. 'We would have been strong enough for Dumbledore to live.' Merida assured herself. It was easy to believe when she had no evidence to the contrary.

"Merida." It seemed that her mother had aged two decades overnight. Where an encouraging smile had always adorned her face, now there were only dark circles beneath her eyes. "I thought you might want some company. I don't think anyone should be alone at the moment. Especially not you."

"Why especially me?" Merida asked. Her voice remained flat through each word, as if she could not find the energy to adjust her tone. She imagined she was not the only one who felt that way. "Why not Harry? He saw it happen. Or the professors. Or you. I've only been here a year, I hardly knew him at all."

"That's not what I meant, Meri." the woman sighed gently. "It must be difficult, to think someone you cared about was capable of such a thing."

"But not for you." Merida bit back weakly. "I'm still waiting for you to say 'I told you so'."

"Oh, Meri, don't be like that." Minerva shook her head as she settled on the steps beside her daughter. "I know I was no great fan of Malfoy's, especially not of late, but I was just as shocked as anyone that he could have been pushed so far. I never knew… I never realised…"

"Of course you didn't." Merida stated. For a moment, her mother thought she might be trying to comfort her. It was soon apparent that that was not the case. "You weren't looking for it, Mum. You just assumed that he was upset about his father, you never thought that the Dark Lord might be punishing him and his family. He spent the whole year alone and afraid, because no one offered him help except Professor Snape. And do you know why? Because no one cared."

Minerva's mouth opened and closed, her mouth forming words she could not force herself to speak. She could hardly believe what she was hearing.

"I cared about him, Meri." Minerva protested. "I care about every student in this school, no matter what their background. I would never have wished this on him."

"But you did." Merida's voice was cold as the stone beneath her feet. She could feel the anger beginning to bubble through her veins, rising from nowhere, like lava through the cracks of a long-dormant volcano. "I might have been unconscious in St. Mungo's, but I could still hear you. You said you wanted him dead for what he did to me."

"I didn't mean it that way." the woman assured her daughter. Tears were beginning to well in her eyes, spilling over onto her already stained cheeks. "I was desperately upset. Meri, you were lying at Death's door. I didn't know if you were going to live or die. You know I would never mean such a terrible thing."

"I don't know anything." Merida sighed. All the anger was gone from her now, leaving only a cold numbness. She did not even know if it had been real; perhaps she just needed someone to blame that was not herself. "Everything's different now, Mum. It's not going to go back, it's probably not even going to get better. It's just all happened so fast."

Seeing her daughter slump over her knees, Minerva wrapped an arm around her shoulders, pulling her close and holding her tight. Just when she had come to terms with her daughter becoming a woman, she seemed to crumble back into childhood.

"It will be alright, Meri." Minerva assured her daughter, running her hand over the girl's auburn curls. "I don't know when and I don't know what it will take, but every nightmare has to end. We'll find a way to get through this, I promise."

"But how can we, Mum?" the young woman whispered. Her voice seemed to echo through the emptiness of the Great Hall, just another example of how things had changed. Back when Dumbledore was alive, the room would never be so empty of a morning; the castle would not seem so empty. "If the Dark Lord can get into Hogwarts, and Harry's going into hiding… the war is real now. It's here."

The professor did not answer, instead holding her daughter tighter as she began to cry. She might have thought it was the fear of war that caused her upset, or perhaps that was simply what she wanted to think. The truth of her daughter's heartbreak was the least of her problems now.

Merida buried her cheek into her mother's shoulder, blotting her tears with the fabric of the woman's robes. In truth, it was not the war itself that brought tears spilling down her cheeks. It was the fact that the previous night had left the answer to her unspoken question painfully clear.

Soon she would have to fight for her life, for her family, her friends and her freedom, just as the rest of the Hogwarts students would do. The most awful thing was, she and Draco would be fighting on opposing sides. And only one side could emerge victorious. For the other, it would be the end.

A/N: This is where it all gets very complicated! Please review!