Virgil ducked his head and mumbled an apology, as Deceit yelled at him for the third time that week about how difficult it was for Deceit to look after him. He wasn't sure exactly when, but he figured that the novelty of having Virgil in the house had worn off for Deceit, and now taking care of Virgil had become a chore for him.

And Deceit made sure he knew it.

"I mean seriously, do you know how much time I have to waste looking after you? I have to feed you and make sure you're clean and drink water and Jesus, it's like you're a pet or something! All I ask is you show a little appreciation, is that really so much? Anxiety, are you listening to me? ANXIETY!"

Abruptly, Deceit grabbed two fistfuls of Virgil's shirt and yanked him forward, eliciting a startled yelp from the anxious side's lips as he was forced in Deceit's space, even though it felt more like his own space was being invaded.

"Are you paying attention to anything I'm saying, you ungrateful piece of shit?" Deceit snarled, his snake-eye almost glinting.

"Y-yes I a-am! I'm s-so, I'm sorry!"

"Oh my God, stop with the stuttering!"

Virgil squeaked and shut his mouth, and Deceit pushed him into the bench as he let go of Virgil's shirt. Virgil made a sound of pain as his back collided harshly with the bench, but said nothing. Deceit made a sound of annoyance, rolled his eyes, and left the room. Virgil waited a minute before moving, too busy trying to get his erratic breathing to calm down to worry about doing anything else. When he had it relatively under control, he turned around, wincing at the pain in his back. He glanced down at the huge pile of dishes, and felt a wave of despair wash over him. It was going to take hours.

He looked over his shoulder and swept his gaze over the kitchen, listening. He could hear Deceit talking to someone upstairs, presumably to – or more like at – the other Side that lived in the house. When Deceit finally left him alone to do…whatever it was he did with the other Side, it was usually for a few hours.

He thought about what Deceit had been saying lately, about how much Virgil was inconveniencing him and how hard it was to look after him. Virgil looked down at the ground, feeling a little guilty. He didn't mean to be so hard to look after, and he did try to help out, but the only thing he really knew how to do was dishes, and sometimes he didn't get the chance to do them after dinner because Deceit would have…other ideas, and then they would pile up like they were now and he wasn't trying to make Deceit feel unappreciated but sometimes he just felt so heavy and empty all at the same time. Sometimes it felt like there was no point in doing anything but at the same time he felt so restless, his mind coming up with a hundred, thousand reasons why he needed to be doing something.

Somehow, his gaze landed on the window above the sink, and his thoughts stopped for a moment. His hands began to shake. Before he could stop to think about what he was doing, he reached forward and unlatched the window, slowly sliding it upwards. He winced when it made a slight creaking sound, but nothing happened and he kept going, opening it all the way. Slowly, carefully, he hauled himself up onto the bench and crawled through the window, stepping down softly into the empty but thankfully solid mindscape. Holding his breath, he eased the window back down until it was closed again.

He waited. A moment passed, and nothing happened. He let out the breath he had been holding.

And then he ran.

He ran, hard and fast, away from the house. Away from Deceit. Away from the Hell he'd been put through over the past few months. He didn't know where he was going. All he knew was that he had to get away. He wanted to be somewhere safe.

He didn't know how long he ran for. He ran until he couldn't breathe properly, and then he ran some more. He ran until his legs felt wobbly and he fell over. He kept moving. When he couldn't run any longer he walked. And walked. And walked. When he'd been walking for what felt like hours, he finally allowed himself to stop, and give himself a rest. There was no use running himself into the ground. He was away, Deceit wouldn't follow him. He'd spent all morning yelling about how much of a burden Virgil was – he was probably rejoicing the fact that Virgil had left. Was likely glad that he no longer had to care for such a screw-up.

Finally, Virgil let himself breathe. When he looked around, he realised that he was back where this had all started – the subconscious space. The corner of Thomas' mind where fragments of everything and nothing floated around in whispers and half-thoughts, with the potential to either become something great or fade into nothing. Usually it was the latter. Virgil sighed. Sometimes he wished that he too could fade into nothing. He felt like ever since the moment that Deceit had taken him in and offered to help him, his life had gotten worse. It had been all right in the beginning, if not a little uncomfortable, but the longer Virgil had stayed there with him, the worse it got. And when Deceit had started wanting more from him, he felt like he was ready to break.

Honestly? Virgil didn't know how – or why – he'd pulled through for so long.

He sat down for a moment, allowing his body to relax as he closed his eyes and let himself get lost in Thomas' thoughts for a while. It was nice, to come back to this, after so long. He had definitely missed the peace and quiet of being on his own. This was the safest he'd felt in a very long while.

He let time pass around him as he relaxed, but eventually, he began to feel restless, and he picked himself up off of the ground and started walking again. He didn't have a specific goal in mind, he just wanted to get as far away from Deceit as possible. Eventually, the darkness of the subconscious subsided and things started to get a little bit brighter. When his stomach growled in hunger, he realised with a jolt that he was back in the mindscape. He almost turned around then and there, but instead he paused, coming to a realisation.

This wasn't the same area of the mindscape he had been in with Deceit. This place was a lot brighter, and held an atmosphere of tranquillity, unlike the gut-churning feelings he got from Deceit's area. He kept walking; certain that even if by some horrible twist of logic Deceit was trying to find him, he would never follow Virgil this far.

Not too long after, Virgil stumbled upon a house. It was the same as the house he had lived in with Deceit – an exact replica of the house Thomas lived in – except this version wasn't so dark and dilapidated. This house was painted in the same colours the house Thomas lived in was painted, and it was completely intact. Eyes widening, Virgil realised that this was the part of the mindscape that Thomas' main Sides lived in.

He slowly approached the house, the anxiousness inside him building with each step he took. What was he supposed to do now that he was here? Did he just…walk in through the front door and beg them to let him stay? No, that was ridiculous, they'd never want him around. They'd likely kick him straight back out.

But…would they?

Would they really? They were Thomas' main Sides. They were logical, and creative, and kind. Surely they wouldn't refuse him without first getting to know him? He allowed hope – traitorous, traitorous hope – to blossom in his breath as he contemplated all the possibilities, and for once, the pros seemed to outweigh the cons. He took another step forward, almost at the door. He could do it! He could go in there, and introduce himself, and ask if he could please live in the house with them. He could do it! He reached his hand out, preparing to knock on the door.

He didn't.

A sudden bout of fear washed over him and he yanked his hand back to his chest so hard he hit himself. He stepped back as he heard voices from inside and dropped to the ground, pressing himself against the wall underneath the kitchen window so as not to be seen. He began to panic, quickly losing control of his breathing as his mind began to race with all the possibilities, all the ways it could go wrong, all the ways he could mess up and look like a pathetic idiot. What if they didn't like him? What if they said he couldn't stay? What if what if what if?

He curled up into a ball and hid his head under his arms. He couldn't think, couldn't concentrate. He was slipping. He pressed himself harder into the wall behind him, trying to ground himself without making any noise. He didn't want them to know he was here. He couldn't even let them know he existed yet. He wasn't ready to face them, wasn't ready to face anyone! But he couldn't calm down, couldn't escape the shackles the panic attack had placed on him, couldn't –

Slowly, he was pulled out of the crushing darkness of his own panic by the sound of somebody singing.

Someone was in the kitchen, singing softly to himself. Virgil brought his arms down off his head in order to hear them better. He thought at first that the singer might have been Patton, but, listening closer, he realised it was Roman, Thomas' Creativity. Virgil couldn't make out what exactly the fanciful Side was singing, but it was a soft, slow melody, and the longer Virgil listened, the more at ease he felt. Roman's voice was soothing, and Virgil closed his eyes, allowing himself to calm down. With Roman's voice still in earshot, it didn't take very long.

By the time Roman left the kitchen, Virgil had managed to calm himself down completely.

He slouched against the wall, no longer feeling like he was about to be crushed under the weight of his own fears. He stretched, easing some of the tightness out of his body, and took a deep breath. He wished for a moment that Roman hadn't left the kitchen – he wanted to keep listening to the creative Side's beautiful voice. An idea sparked in his head, and he crept around the side of the house to where he knew the living room to be. As he did, the voices he could faintly hear from within became a little bit louder as he got closer in proximity to them.

Now he could hear Patton, as well. He still wasn't sure exactly what the other Side was saying, but, just like Roman's singing, the sound of the other Side's voice soothed him. He sat down beside the wall and allowed the ghost of a smile to creep up on his face. He sat there for a little while, just listening to the comforting voices of the other Sides going about their business. He made his decision. He was going to go in, and he was going to tell them who he was, and he was going to request that they allow him to stay with them. He was going to do it, but first…

First he just wanted to listen for a little while longer. This was the first time he had felt truly at peace for a very, very long time. Even before Deceit had taken him in, he'd never felt this happy, this calm. He'd been empty out there on his own. He'd been crushed with Deceit. But maybe here, with the others, he could feel whole. He wouldn't be alone, at the very least, and he knew they were better than Deceit. Knew they wouldn't hurt him the way the serpentine Side seemed to enjoy hurting him. He closed his eyes and allowed his mind to wander, finally letting his guard down.

It was a mistake.

Out of nowhere, a hand gripped him by the neck and yanked him forward, twisting him around and slamming him harshly into the ground. A shriek tried to rip its way out of his throat, but no sound came out. His eyes flew open and he was met with the furious gaze of Deceit, whose snake eye seemed to be glowing. Deceit lowered himself over Virgil until their faces were almost touching, and Virgil began to shake in fear.

"And just what do you think you're doing?" Deceit hissed. Virgil tried to respond, but he couldn't form the words. The euphoria he'd felt only moments ago had evaporated, leaving sheer terror in its wake. Deceit had found him, all the way out here.

And Deceit was mad. Worse, he was livid.

A whimper escaped Virgil's lips.

"Well?" Deceit snarled. "What do you have to say for yourself?" The pressure on Virgil's throat disappeared, and Virgil realised that he was able to talk again. Even so, he could make anything but incoherent babble come out of his mouth. Abruptly she shut his mouth, remembering how much Deceit hated his pathetic stuttering, but it was too late. In a fit of rage, Deceit picked him up and slammed him into the wall so hard that the house shook from the impact. Virgil's head made a horrible cracking sound at the impact, and pain exploded in his skull. He moaned.

Deceit opened his mouth, but stopped. Virgil realised that the noises from within the house had suddenly ceased.

"What was that?" Roman's voice travelled. Logan gave a response Virgil couldn't make out through the ringing in his head, but Roman was close enough that he could hear the creative Side when he said "I'll go check."

Deceit hissed, and began to sink out, taking Virgil with him. Virgil heard the door to the house open, and then they were gone.

They reappeared in the living room of Deceit's house, and Virgil felt suddenly overwhelmed by a crushing sense of hopelessness. There was no chance for him now.

"Now that we have a bit more privacy," Deceit growled. "Care to explain why you just up and left without any explanation?"

Virgil swallowed against the hand wrapped around his throat, pressing himself further into the living room wall in a futile attempt to get himself away. When it – unsurprisingly – didn't work, he tried to form something coherent to say. There was no use continuing to be silent – it would just anger Deceit further.

"I- You were saying how h-hard it was to look after me, and I d-didn't want to be a- to be a burden, so I thought –"

"Ah, see there's the problem. You thought." Deceit spat. "Next time, leave the thinking to me."

"I'm sorry." Virgil said, only just managing to hold himself back from snapping at the other Side. He knew Deceit could be unfair, but that was just ridiculous. How was he supposed to not think? But Deceit didn't catch the near slip-up, and, finally, he let Virgil go, stepping back slightly while Virgil struggled to keep himself upright.

"Don't do it again." Deceit snapped brusquely, and Virgil knew that was as 'accepted' as his apology was going to get. "Do you have any idea how long I searched for you when I realised you were gone?" A new feeling was starting to well up inside Virgil. "I didn't think you would be that selfish." He recognised it as anger. He was angry. "After all you've done to inconvenience me, I still –"

"IF I'M SUCH AN INCONVENIENCE TO YOU, THEN WHY DON'T YOU JUST GET RID OF ME–"

SMACK!

Virgil stumbled backwards, clutching his cheek in shock. The anger disappeared as quickly as it had arrived, fear returning to claw at his chest as it sank in that Deceit had slapped him. He flinched violently as Deceit moved closer to him, backing him up against the wall once more and towering over him as Virgil shrank in on himself.

Deceit slammed his hands against the wall, one on each side of Virgil's head, and he yelped. Deceit leaned forward. "Don't. You. Ever! Raise your voice at me again. Do you understand?" Virgil nodded fearfully, but it wasn't enough for the other side. "I SAID DO YOU UNDERSTAND?" Deceit roared.

"Yes!" Virgil cried.

"Good. Now, do you want to know why I keep you around? Why I haven't gotten rid of you already?" Shakily, Virgil nodded his confirmation. "The reason I haven't gotten rid of you, is because I can't." Even through his fear, his confusion must have shown, because Deceit elaborated. "You wanted to go live with the other Sides? Well, too bad, because they didn't want you."

Virgil's heart stopped for a moment, and he forgot how to breathe. "W-what?"

"I said, they. Didn't. Want. You." Deceit enunciated each word harshly, and tears threatened to spill over his eyes as Virgil took the words in. "I already tried to get rid of you, but the other Sides wanted nothing to do with you. They didn't want you anywhere near them." The tears spilled over, and Virgil's heart broke.

He really did have nowhere else to go. Deceit was the only one that wanted him.

No, that was wrong. Not even Deceit wanted him – he had tried to get rid of him, but he was the only one willing to at the very least put up with him. This was the only place he was welcome.

"Was that not the answer you wanted, hmm?" Deceit asked cruelly. "Go on; tell me, Virgil, what exactly is going on in that idiotic head of yours?"

Virgil flinched, horror coursing through him as the words sunk in.

Deceit knew his name.

How did Deceit know his name?

Deceit gave a lopsided grin. "Virgil." He repeated with a laugh. "What a stupid name. No wonder you tried to hide it from me."

Virgil sobbed. His name was the one thing he had left, the one thing that was his, and only his, and now he didn't even have that. He had nothing. He hung his head to try to hide the tears that were now streaking down his cheeks, but Deceit grabbed his chin and held it between his thumb and his forefinger, tilting Virgil's face upwards. With his other hand, he thumbed a tear away from Virgil's cheek. The serpentine Side let Virgil cry silently for a few minutes before speaking again.

"Are you going to raise your voice at me like that again, Virgil?" He asked, his voice soft but his tone expectant.

"No." Virgil whispered, defeated.

"Are you going to try and leave again?"

"No."

"Good boy. Nobody wants you but me, Virgil. Don't forget that."

"I won't."

"I didn't think so. Now, after I went through all that trouble to bring you home, I think it's time you make it up to me, don't you?"

Virgil said nothing. It wasn't like his opinion mattered anyway.

Deceit took his silence as a yes.

The older Side manoeuvred Virgil to the middle of the living room and pushed him down to the floor onto his back. Virgil braced himself to be used, but Deceit had other ideas.

"I want you to participate this time, Virgil."

So he did. He did everything Deceit wanted, let himself be humiliated and debased at Deceit's will, even though he had no idea what he was doing. He had never been an active participant in the sex the two of them had, but Deceit seemed pleased enough.

By the time Deceit decided they were done, Virgil had never felt dirtier.