Syed sat awkwardly on a couch which was still unfamiliar to him. Christian had brought him "home" two days ago, and in those two days, no more memories had come back to Syed. In his dreams, his memories had taunted him, playing just at the edge of his consciousness, only for him to forget them as soon as he woke. None of the photos that Christian had around the house - that they had around their home - were doing anything to pull at the fog in his mind, and with each passing hour, Syed grew more and more frustrated, with himself, and with the whole situation.
He knew Christian was only trying to help, he really did, but every time he asked Syed if anything was coming back to him, and Syed had to shake his head,and watch the hope drain from Christian's eyes again, Syed felt terrible. But more than that, the way Christian was constantly tip toeing around him made Syed feel as if he were made of glass. He would constantly be hovering, be it in the corner, or in the next room, always feeling the need to let Syed know what he was doing, where he was going, that he was just here if he needed anything. And it was making Syed feel overwhelmed by the whole situation.
In reality, Christian just desperately wanted to slip back into their old life together; for things to be the way they had been just a few short weeks ago. He knew he was being unfair on Syed, that none of this was his fault, but he couldn't help but pine for the almost perfect routine they had - finally - managed to get themselves into. It had taken them so long to get to this happy medium, one where Syed was both at ease with himself and confident of what - and whom - he wanted, and where Syed was assured that he had the love and support of his family; something that he'd striven for since before Christian had even met him.
When they'd left for Florida all those years ago, Christian had, if he was being honest with himself, seen it as a make-or-break chance for the two of them. A fresh start, in a new place, where no one knew them and judged them on their history and - many - past mistakes. If, in this new life they were starting for themselves, Syed was able to be honest with him, to have faith in him and trust him, Christian would happily embrace their life together and fight for it - for them- with everything he had. If, however, Syed had slipped back into old habits, the lying, the mistrust, Christian had sworn to himself that they would, finally, be finished. And he was thankful every single day that Syed had managed to accomplish the former.
It had seemed to Christian as if something had snapped inside Syed that day at the Argee Bhajee, the day that Christian been leaving for Florida, and he'd realised just how close he had came to losing Christian - for good this time. There had been many times in the past where they had broken up, but they had both known in their hearts that neither had ever wanted to be apart. But on that day, when they'd eventually ended up leaving Walford, Syed seemed to have realised just how much he loved Christian, and how much he needed him in his life.
Not that Syed could remember any of that now.
If he was honest with himself, the only thing that Syed knew with absolute certainty was how much he was attracted to Christian. Truth be told, that was why he had reacted the way he had when Christian had touched him in the hospital that first day he had woken up; he had been so scared by the intensity of his feelings - physically, at least. Just one touch seemed to call out to something deep inside of him, something which, even now, in all the uncertainty, yearned to call back. But Syed knew that it would be unfair for him to act on any of his physical feelings for Christian right now when they were both in such emotional turmoil.
"Sy?" Christian's voice brought Syed back to the here and now, and he heaved himself off the sofa with a sigh. Surely there had to be something, somewhere, that could help him trigger those lost memories? As he headed through to the kitchen, Syed was struck with a new determination; he would get his memories- and his life - back, no matter what.