"Today, on the Loser channel." Rush floated several stories in the air smiling at the the camera in a Santa Claus suit and hat. The outfit was hardly even a costume, if anything, it looked more like red pajamas with fluffy white endings. It was the Santa Clause bag that was most absurd, in which she'd pull out various kinks to throw at her enemies.

"First," she said in a serious tone, ignoring the sounds of combat below her. "I'd like to apologize to all the racists who have left our website since the E88 ambush. We had no idea that dressing up as nazis would offend you, and we promise never to do that again." She crossed her fingers at the camera. "So in the name of Scion, we promise to be more sensitive to people's feelings from now on. Especially for the nazis, who's feelings are much more sensitive than most..." Rush laughed maniacally at her own sarcasm.

"And now, my bitches and bastards, onto the Loser channel!" Rush pointed her middle fingers to the rooftops. The night lights of the city lit up the building rooftops as Light and Shadow Stalker skittered across them. They breathed heavily as they ran. Both were refusing to concede to each other's speed.

They fired their projectiles at each other, attempting to hit each other whenever not in their breaker states. Light's lasers lit up the roof tops as he shot, and Shadow Stalkers bow's were completely visible in the night. Glowing building boards and side lights gave an ideal visual for them, and Leet's drone camera gave a high definition image of their chase; crystal clear even at midnight.

"Shadow Stalker," Light extended an arm, "roses are red, violets are blue, you are the light to my shadow, for I have fallen for you!"

Light lit up his powers into a pink heart in the sky. It gleamed so bright the building illuminated even more.

"Shut the hell up you fucking bastard!" Shadow Stalker shot an arrow at the heart, causing it to firework into more miniature hearts.

"You have struck my heart with such love, you majestic dark angel from heaven!"

"Shut your damn mouth!" Shadow Stalker screamed.

This was an ongoing joke within their fan community. Shadow Stalker had once insulted Light heavily during one of their heists, and Light retorted back with compliments which only pissed her off even more. Ever since then, people began shipping Light and Shadow Stalker as a light/dark love/hate relationship, and the team finally decided to make a gimmick out of it.

Light wore a pink hoodie sweater with pink butterfly wings behind his back. He had initially faced with Shadow Stalker and yelled, "Shadow Stalker, my Luv, you have robbed me of my cupid arrows, just as you have robbed me of my heart!"

Rush narrated their chase as Shadow Stalker attacked Light with pure rage. "Oh how scandalous!" Rush said to the drone camera, "The Stalker of the Night has begun stalking the bringer of Light! Oh what length's love hath truly takes us!"

"Shadow Stalker," Light shaped his hands to a heart, and made it glow with pink energy,"you have lighted your way to my soul, my beautiful night angel."

"Arggghh!" She charged at him, this time to use her crossbow as a blunt object to clobber him. "I'll kill you!"

Light shifted away to safety, "a lover's murder, the truest crime of passion."

Further away from them, Triumph and Dauntless fought off against Uber, Leet, and Spitfire. The trio blocked off the Protectorate from the Ward they were mentoring. Leet wore a Jack Skeleton costume, which worked surprisingly well for him with his already thin frame. Spitfire had bunny ears on, her mask and torn hazardous costume gave her the impression of being a radioactive bunny. Uber was a skimpy leprechaun. His broad body made his muscles ridiculously extrude, even underneath the green bra and kilt.

"Our first night mentoring her," Triumph groaned while facing them, "and these guys are trying to make fools out of us."

Uber's biosuit formed large heavy gloves around his arms. "Spitfire. Wall."

Spitfire launched a wall of fire between them and the heroes, making sure to block the line of sight both sides. Uber sprinted through the wall of fire while quickly wrapping himself around his armor. He charged out to Dauntless. The hero blocked the assault with his energy enhanced shield, but was still pushed back by Uber's force. He'd have fallen off the ledge of the building if his boots didn't allow him to fly.

"Make sure you make Dauntless look good." Rush said to Uber. "The guy is freakishly camera shy, he needs a rep boost. Let him kick you around a bit, lose to him good. If we're lucky, he'll look good enough to manage his own team, and the PRT will finally get that poster boy they've been trying to make out of him."

Uber chuckled to himself, remembering what Rush had asked from him earlier. It was easy enough for him, considering his power. He could either become a combat master or a drunken master. Letting the PRT win some battles had so many benefits. At the moment, it felt nice being the joke villain again, this time intentionally instead of unintentionally.

Dauntless swung his spear into Uber. Uber smiled, it wasn't a great swing, it was one he could've easily dodged and parried, but he chose not to. The hit knocked Uber several feet away, making it look like he'd tossed and turned in a comedic manner. His armor cushioned the impact. Uber stood right back up and looked over to Leet.

"You good bro?" Leet asked.

"Bro," Uber feigned dizziness, "I could use some backup, bro."

Leet faced his ionizer ray at Triumph. "You got it, bro."

Leet launched a radiant laser at Triumph. Dauntless launched himself in front of him, using his shield to block the blast. His actions were predictable, Uber began feeling like he was movie director.

Triumph fired his seismic screech at Spitfire's direction. It snuffed out the remaining flames and Spitfire flew back in pain. There was a ringing in her ears, "owww," she groaned in pain. Over the intercom Spitfire said, "Rush, I could use some help here please."

Rush looked over at her fallen teammate, "just yell jailbait. They'll never touch you."

"Come on bro!" Spitfire yelled.

"Fine," Rush opened up her Santa Claus bag. A ridiculously long bazuka stretched out from it.

"What the hell," Triumph said looking up.

"Don't worry," Dauntless said. "I've seen some of their videos, it's never as bad as they make it out to be."

Triumph asked, "you watched their videos too?"

"I'm dead serious Triumph, I watched it for studying reasons."

Rush pointed the bazuka from the sky. "Merry Christmas motherfucker."

She launched the cannon at them. It hit Dauntless's shield, but exploded like a pound of dust. The smog rose around them, making their sight difficult to see. Triumph sniffed, "is that… Cinnamon?"

The brown dust floated around them with the smell of christmas. Rush yelled down at them, "and don't make me take out the dildo cannon for the naughty kids!"

"The things you guys tinker is ridiculous," Dauntless said, preparing to charge at Uber again.

Things had become complicated for Dauntless. He couldn't be everywhere at once. Shadow Stalker and Light ran away from him when he approached. And Rush made it her mission to make sure they stayed on their one on one match, she even kept out of combat for the sake of narrating the show. So the only option he had was to distract three of the members to buy time for the rest of the Protectorate to arrive.

Shadow Stalker launched a lethal arrow at Light. It was one she kept hidden from her mentors, stored for the sake of feeling powerful. Light dodged it as he did with the other arrows, but paled when he saw it stick in the wall next to his head. "I know love hurts, but shooting people isn't the answer."

"Will you shut the hell up about the bullshit!" Shadow Stalker yelled, "do you have any idea how many people have fucked with me because of your damn show?"

"To be fair, I think I could do better too."

Shadow Stalker screamed, she ran towards him solely to try and strangle him. Light flashed a light into her eyes, and shifted away while she was temporarily blinded. "Sister," Light called out, "she just broke my heart, can we go home now?"

Rush looked over from a distance. She noticed PRT vehicles closing in on the streets below them. Battery, Assault, Armsmaster, and Miss Militia were arriving closer to them. "Yeah," Rush said, "Operation Seduce Shadow Stalker was a failure."

"Losers," Uber yelled, "retreat!" Leet threw a flash bang at Dauntless and Triumph. Spitfire launched heavy amounts of ice at the ground to ensure their escape.

"Light," Light said, "respawn to base."

"Rush," Rush said, "respawn to base."

They waited to teleport home. Instead, they were left standing still in momentary silence. Leet tapped at his backpack, "Clank, what the hell?" His robot didn't respond.

Uber looked over to his friend, "did... something just happen?"

Spitfire, Uber and Leet returned to Rush's building, just as Light joined them. "Dude," Light said to Leet, "why didn't we respawn?"

Leet put down his backpack. He began picking at the buttons and openings of his user-friendly backpack. "I don't…" Dauntless and Triumph caught up to them. Shadow Stalker shifted to their sides while Leet hastily tried figuring out what had gone wrong.

Armsmaster and his team reached the other rooftop. While Dauntless, Triumph, and Shadow Stalker blocked their left side, the rest of the protectorate blocked their other side. Leet looked up at Armsmaster. "Oh. Fuck. No."

Armsmaster had a miniature green glowing light extruding from his Halberd. Leet recognized it. It was the same type of light his teleporters showed from the inside of their masks. It was the same kind of light used in the schematics he'd sold to Toy Box. It was the same kind of light that could be used to jam the frequencies of another teleporter, if there were a tinker willing to do so.

Leet glared at Armsmaster, "fucking tinkers…"

"You're surrounded," Armsmaster announced. "We know all of your tactics, and all possible methods you could use to escape. We've studied your combat footage and prepared for every scenario. Things will only be worse for you unless you surrender right now."

Light replied, "aha, so you watched our show too."

In a confident tone, Armsmaster replied, "I did, and I didn't find anything you've all done as funny." The Losers cringed back together, like that was the most insulful thing they'd ever heard in their cape careers. "Turn yourselves in," he ordered from them.

Rush yelled at him, "over my dead body you illuminati scum!" She took the camera drone and lifted it over my head. "This camera drone happens to have a kiloton neutron bomb inside, so unless you want this west side of this city to blow up, I suggest you all back the hell off."

Dauntless and his patrol partners took a step back. Miss Militia looked over to Armsmaster. "You're lying," Armsmaster said firmly. "Not only is killing against your principle, but I short circuited all of Leet's inventions. What you're holding there is as dangerous as a toaster."

Leet yelled, "Fuck you you cheating tinker. You're a cheap ToyBox stealing motherfucking-" Spitfire walked over to Leet and pushed a button on the edge of his Jack skeleton mask. The mask proceeded to censor Leet's profanity. "-****** ******* wannabe **** slinging fake tinker!"

Unfazed by Leet's profanity, Armsmaster added, "my helmet also tells me when you're lying. There is no bomb in that drone."

"Wow," Light said, "Tinkers are bullshit."

Leet snickered, "I know, right?"

"You have two options," Armsmaster said, raising his Halberd, "either surrender, and make things easier on yourselves. Or not surrender, and risk getting seriously injured, while also risking any chance of an acquittal for your cases."

Uber looked over at his team. Armsmaster was right. Rush couldn't fly them out, especially if she carried the combined weight five people. Leet's wildcards were turned useless. Light was all talk, and Spitfire would never do anything to cause real collateral damage. When it came down to them versus the Protectorate, their only chance was to run, and that wasn't an option anymore.

Uber raised his arms in surrender. "Uber," Rush yelled, "traitor!"

"C'mon Rush, you really think things'll go better if we fought?"

The team fell silent for a moment. They really were out of options. Spitfire raised her arms up in surrender. Leet copied her. Light put his hands in his pockets.

Rush saw a chance to take her brother and just run, but she was also certain she couldn't fly the both of them away from Dauntless. 'Maybe he could escape. I could fly him far away enough, and then I could distract Dauntless while Vivan ran away.'

But that wasn't an option for Vivan either. He wouldn't know what to do if he were alone. He could return to base and ask help from Marvin to break the team out, but that was still a long shot.

No, the best chance she had of outrunning Dauntless and saving her brother, was for her to escape to the base alone. "Okay," Rush said, "I've got an idea. Just make a distraction for me."

XXX

"You tried ditching us," Uber said in a plain tone while walking.

"C'mon bro, I was gonna come back for you guys," Rush smiled as she walked to the PRT van in handcuffs. The team followed suit behind her, defeated, handcuffed, yet surprisingly casual about their arrests.

Uber said, "You yelled, 'every man for themselves,' and flew off while calling us stupid bitches."

"It was just to throw them off," Rush argued, "I didn't want them to think I was gonna save you guys later."

"It was still a pretty bad plan," Light said, not really upset. "I thought you knew Dauntless could outrun you."

Rush shrugged, "l was hoping me yelling jailbait would throw him off."

Uber asked, "are you aware that you're not actually jailbait?"

"Sure, but they don't need to know that."

Leet grumbled as he walked behind everyone in handcuffs. The Protectorate members eyed them as he walked. Leet couldn't stop brooding. His mask still censored him as he glared at Armsmaster. "You ******* fake ****ing tinker taking my ******* designs like a ****ing wannabe little *****. Those were my schematics! My ****ing *****! You stole them like a ****ing ***** ****. **** ***** ****** ***** ***** *****. Mother of a ****** **** ****** **** ******. **** you! **** this earth, ****the protectorate, and **** bull**** cheating tinkers!"

Armsmaster shook his head, "next time, don't sell your inventions to Toy Box for anyone to buy and reverse engineer."

"You're enjoying this you cheating horse pile of smoldering ****! Those were my designs, my hard work! You're a cheap piece of **** you ****ing fake tinker!"

Shadow Stalker puffed her chest as Light was the last person to enter the van. "Got any more funny things to say, retarded villain?" Without saying a word, Light blew a kiss in Shadow Stalker's direction. The van door closed behind him as he whispered 'wait for me'. She yelled at him, "I hope you get fucked in prison."

Cementing themselves to their seats, they all let out a loud sigh in defeat. The vehicle gradually moved to the place to carry out their arrests. "Well," Rush said in a slight daze. "I did not wake up this morning expecting to get arrested."

Uber said, "I don't think any of us did."

"Coolio," Light said spinning things into a positive light. "I'm gonna get so much street cred when I break out."

"Alright," Rush said taking charge. "I think we'll need a plan for how we'll operate in the birdcage. Me and Emily will prostitute ourselves for favors. Robert can do that too since he's sexy. Edwin will be Robert's bottom bitch so he can stay safe. Bromance to the max."

"You know," Uber said in a normal voice, "are you sure people won't think I'm the bottom bitch since I might go to prison in a sexy leprechaun suit?"

Rush nodded, "if that happens, I personally apologize for whatever you go through next."

"Well that's reassuring."

"And Light," Rush said, "never do that heart thing you did for Shadow Stalker when we reach the Birdcage. It'll give people the wrong impressions."

"Remember guys," Light said, "never take free gifts from strangers. Things are never free in prison."

"That's right," Rush nodded approvingly. "As long as we all pull our ass-sets together, and whore ourselves in an organized fashion, I'm sure living in the birdcage will turn out to be…. Emily, are you crying?"

They heard sniffling beneath her mask. "No…" Spitfire whimpered in a pathetic tone. "I just… really don't wanna go to the birdcage."

An immense guilt flew over all of her teammates. "Wait, Emily," Rush shook her head, "I swear I was just kidding. Don't worry, I won't pimp you out when we reach there!"

It didn't make her feel better. Leet swallowed, "listen Emily…" He wanted to comfort her, but didn't know what to say. "****, I can't think of a bright side."

"We can get prison tattoos!" Light said optimistically.

Now Spitfire was tearing up, they could hear her choking underneath her mask. "But I don't want tattoos…."

"Crap," Uber said, realizing how dense his team was. "Alright, listen Emily. I know how this is gonna work, I've been down this road before. You're not actually going to the birdcage. They're gonna offer you a deal. Ask for a lawyer first, because they're always better at negotiating deals than you. Don't agree to anything until you've got a lawyer giving you all the options you have in front of you."

"Okay," Spitfire said in a weak voice, "But my parents will kill me when they find out…"

"They won't find out," Uber said. "In fact, your civilian identity is probably the safest thing you have right now. Even if you're a minor, unmasking you takes away any chance they have of working with you. They're not gonna take away that leverage, and they're not gonna tell your family and force you to become a full-time villain."

Spitfire swallowed, "Robert, how are you sure about that?"

Uber muttered quietly to himself.

"Wait," Rush said, "what did you just say?"

"I used to be a Ward," he repeated crystal clear.

Light cocked his head back, "you were a ward?"

Uber nodded, "kind of forced into it. Something I found out while there was that they'll recruit almost anyone, as long as they're willing. Of course, you can get better deals with them if you lawyer up, because there are more options and deals that most of us don't even know about."

"But you were a Ward?" Light shook his head, "I think I just lost some respect for you."

Uber sighed, "which is exactly why I didn't want to tell you guys. I hated the rules and pressure, I left the minute I had the chance"

Spitfire asked in a now stale voice, "what… kind of deals could they offer me?"

"You're about to graduate," Uber said, "you're more likely to go straight to probationary Protectorate member. More likely in another city since you have a reputation here. And yes, you can keep your trigger event a secret."

Rush said, "hey Vivan, do me a favor and-"

The van tipped over to the side. The sound of crashing followed as they tumbled around inside the back of the van. They rolled and turned, flipped onto one another before the van finally came to a thrashing halt.

The back door of the van opened. "Come on," Faultline said. "We're getting you out of here."