Light spoke into the camera in a confident tone. He was donning a familiar costume that was infamous in America. "Hello E88. This is my video application for joining the E88."

He was wearing a long, klu klux klan costume, with long white robes covering his arms and face. But the eye holes of the cone hat, and exposed tan skinned on his hands, all revealed how plainly obvious he wasn't white supremacist material. He spoke into the camera in front of him.

"My resume includes, advocating for a wall between Canada and America. Telling the french guy his pastries were shitty. Beating up oriental hookers in GTA, and being a registered republican in my local district."

Rush asked from behind camera, "wait, you have to say Asian, not oriental. Oriental isn't racist enough."

"Bullshit," Vivan said. "Asian is literally just people from Asia. Oriental is literally defined as 'shiny object.' How the hell is calling someone a shiny object less racist than asian?"

Leet said, "as a libertarian, I'm offended by that republican comment."

Uber added, "also, I'm pretty sure that French guy was actually Italian. All Europeans look alike."

The whole team gasped around him. Rush said, "oh, so all Eurpoeans are the same now? Christ, you're a racist fuck."

"Seriously," Light said crossing his clan covered arms. "That is so, ignorant of you."

"Hey Leet," Rush said, "I think your bro is racist."

The camera turned to Leet and Spitfire. They sat on the couch playing video games in their costume masks. They both had on sweatpants, with Spitfire having a white t-shirt and Leet having a black t-shirt. Leet answered, "he's German, what did you expect?"

Rush questioned, "Uber is German? Then why the fuck hasn't he slept with me yet? I'm the closest thing to chocolate he gets to taste."

Spitfire mentioned, "to be fair, everyone loves chocolate, not just Germans."

Rush added, "god it's great being sugary brown."

"All of you," Uber yelled, "Fuck all of you."

XXX

It was daytime. Brian, Lisa, and Alec walked across the street and headed towards the Loser's apartment base. Staring up at the large apartment complex, Alec couldn't help but feel some envy towards them. "Okay, so how is it that the Losers get so many floors, and we're stuck with our abandoned warehouse of solitude?"

"It's not so different from our base," Brian said. "Taking a building that's abandoned and making the inside more livable. It's not much better than what we did."

"Not quite," Lisa said scanning the building from top to bottom. "The building has defenses that break half the laws of physics. I feel bad for whoever gets the bright idea to try and attack them here."

Alec looked over at the electric padlock at the entrance of the building. He said, "I'll bet you a hundred dollars I can guess their password is."

Lisa commented, "we're not gonna trip an alarm for you."

"I said guess, not try. I bet you a hundred bucks the password is password."

Heading towards the door of the apartment complex, Lisa stared down at the electronic combination lock. She frowned, and typed in the password the Losers had given her.

P-A-S-S-W-O-R-D-1.

"Fuck," Alec said, "that's why you didn't bet."

Lisa murmured, "you still would've lost..."

XXX

Vivan wrapped his arms around Robert's back. He didn't remove his kkk costume after the broadcast had finished, and he still felt the urge to bring Robert into the dark side. "Embrace my white power!"

Robert yelled at him, "stop tempting me you little bastard!"

"How dare you call me little!"

Aryana threw a wad of bills at Robert's body, "we demand you accept your Aryan heritage!"

Robert leaned his back against the floor to crush Vivan with his own body. Robert said, "I'm ordering curry today, and I'm throwing it in both your faces."

"Wrong race," Vivan groaned weighted down underneath Robert's back, "close, but not quite."

Emily was sitting on the sofa, drinking her tea calmly as Vivan and Robert wrestled on the living room floor. Emily said, "you said we were close when we said Mexico, South Africa, and Hawaii. We've literally narrowed down your ethnicity to everything that isn't completely white."

Robert stood up from the floor, and Vivan clutched onto his kkk hoodie. "But I feel white, that should count for something."

"Not true," Aryana said, "until you've experienced white privilege, the E88 will never accept you."

"New plan then," Vivan said, "Edwin, I need you to infiltrate the E88."

Edwin shrugged, "I think we're beyond the point that any of them would accept me or Robert."

"Or me," Emily mentioned. "Not that I'm upset about it."

There was a knock on the door. The five of them turned at the noise, and then stared at Aryana. Emily asked, "chlamydia again?"

Aryana blinked, "I honestly don't remember." On a few occasions, Aryana would invite dying patients to spend the evening with the team. It wasn't a regular thing, but she'd often call the cancer visitors 'chlamydia patients' as a joke. Aryana walked over to the door and opened it to see the Undersiders. Without an ounce of surprise, Aryana asked, "you guys have chlamydia?"

Brian frowned. He looked over her shoulder, and saw Vivan waving hi to him in a kkk uniform. Lisa sighed, "Rush, you know exactly who we are. You're pretending you don't know for the funny, and it's mostly because you're trying to make light of the lousy situation you and your brother are in. So can we stop playing games right now, and just let us in so we can talk about a team heist?"

Aryana squinted at Lisa, "wow, five seconds I already don't like you." Aryana shut the door at their faces.

Alec said to Lisa, "great, you got us kicked out."

"Relax," Lisa said, "just wait for it."

Behind the door, the Losers spoke among themselves in loud voices clearly meant for the Undersiders to hear. From the other side, Brian, Alec, and Lisa could all hear her clearly. Aryana said, "alright guys, the Undersiders are here. And Tattletale reads minds. So put all your bad shit in the air before she uses it against us."

"Fuck," Robert said. "Edwin, I used your razor to shave my crotch."

Vivan commented, "Edwin shaves? But his skin is as smooth as an albino colored eggplant."

Edwin squinted at him, "Vivan, I've been doing secret experiments on you while you slept for the last three months."

"Holy crap," Vivan patted his head, "no wonder my hair glows in the dark."

"Emily," Aryana said. "The truth is, the reason I don't sexualize you isn't because you're underage, it's because I want to preserve your virginal innocence for as long as possible. Because I know that if I had the chance, I'd soil your spirit hole in the most vulgar and grotesque ways possibles."

Emily blinked at her, "Okay...I don't, have any secrets I keep from you guys."

"Edwin," Vivan said, "you don't want to know why, but it's extremely important you never use your toothbrush again. Don't ask, you don't want to know, but trust me on this. NEVER use your toothbrush again."

Edwin stared at him for a long moment. "You fucking little bitch, I knew it!"

"I'm not fucking little!" Vivan squeeled before Edwin tackled him to the ground. Robert tried breaking them up, but only got caught in between their wrestling.

Edwin yelled, "why the fuck do you all screw around with hygiene products! You can literally buy your own shit at seven eleven!"

Aryana yelled down at them as they continued to fight, "guys, can't you see Tattletale is trying to tear us apart! Don't let her mind tricks get to you!"

The Undersiders in the hallway were only left outside the door to hear their bickering. Alec was leaning against the wall, laughing so hard he was losing his breathe. "Lisa," he said, "we are so fucked here."

Brian wasn't impressed. He turned to Lisa and asked, "how long is this gonna last?"

Lisa yelled at them from outside the door, "I haven't even said anything!

After a few more minutes of wrecking noises, Aryana opened the door for them to enter, "okay, I think we're ready now."

Stepping inside, the Undersiders noticed that Edwin was tied to a wooden chair. Duck tape wrapped around his legs, arms, and body to keep him tied in place. Tape covered his mouth, but there was enough opening for him to mumble. "Why the- fffff-uk am I the one- thatz ti-ed?"

Vivan yelled, "because that's what white privilege is, lil bitch!" Vivan turned at Alec with a glare, "you're next."

"I'm Canadian," Alec said quickly.

Vivan blinked, and stared up at the ceiling in amazement. "Oh my God, we finally have enough diversity for a cereal commercial."

"That's it," Brian finally said. "This isn't going to work out. None of you have shown you want to work together. If none of you want this, why should we keep pretending like this will lead anywhere?"

The Losers didn't say anything. Brian asked again, "are any of you serious about this, or not?"

Aryana answered, "nope. But it's pretty obvious that there's a reason you want to work with us. Despite the name, you know we win. Or at least, never get caught. That's why you've been tolerating us long enough to finally meet us at our base."

Aryana tapped a finger on Brian's chest, she said, "we're never serious. You'll have to deal with that, but we can still work together if you want it. So if you can tolerate this," she pointed to Edwin struggling in the chair to emphasize the point, "we'll be fine. If not, feel free to leave right now."

Brian frowned, it was clear Aryana was more self-aware than she pretended to be. Lisa answered for him, "this won't be a problem. As long as the missions work out the way we want them to, an alliance can work out."

Aryana looked over at Lisa again. "Seriously, there is just something about your face that I just really don't like. I'm sorry, but can you just stop talking? I want to punch you the more you talk."

Lisa bobbed her head, "you can't be serious."

Aryana shrugged, "if you can tell what I'm thinking, I might as well say it."

Vivan yelled out, "you have very nicely combed hair, and I really like how your sweater matches your eyes."

Robert said, "also, your shoes are a little tacky. Next time, go for something that's a little more in season."

Emily said, "wait, does fashion advice count as the truth? Aryana, I think you would look a lot nicer if you started wearing earrings."

Aryana replied to her, "Emily, I love you so much, never let your guard down around me."

Lisa's mouth was left open, "oh my God… This is my life now…"

XXX

Purity and Kaiser stared down against Hookwolf and Krieg across from them. They were out of costume, standing in an alleyway that was dangerously far away from E88 territory. In fact, it was near towards the PRT base. All of them made a pact to keep this conversation strictly between them four.

"We kill them all," Hookwolf said. "We kill ten niggers for every day they don't surrender to us, let them know they're own fame is causing the hurt, and let everyone know not to fuck with the E88."

Kaiser shook his head, "that's full-scale war. The Triumvirate would make the effort to stop us."

Hookwolf glared at the former leader. "Look around you Kaiser, this is war! I'm done waiting, playing along and pretending patience is key. We need to flush them out, and make them feel the pain that the E88 brings."

Kaiser glanced over at Purity. She was quiet. She couldn't believe the corner she'd been pushed into. The Losers, of all people, were putting them at risk of a civil war. If Purity couldn't convince Hookwolf and Krieg that this was under control, fracturing was inevitable.

"We can't go to war," Purity said. "Not against the Triumvirate, not against the Losers. I tried negotiating a truce with them, they refused."

Krieg raised an eyebrow, "you tried negotiating… A truce?"

Purity nodded, "I told them we'd stop doing hate crimes, focus on fighting other gangs if they stopped-"

Krieg slammed his fist against the wall. "You what!?" Krieg walked closer to her, "just what the hell are you making us into? Where do you stand with the E88?"

"Enough," Kaiser said, taking control of the situation. Just as he'd always been, he was watching out for Purity's back, making sure he had more control of the organization than she did. Kaiser said, "I think I know a way to send a message to the Losers. It won't carry the same consequences to war, but it'll make one thing clear to the world. No one stabs the E88 and gets away with it."