Present - Somewhere else
Light anchored the E88 member to the alleyway wall. Light chains formulated around his limbs, and he hung against the graffiti stained wall as a hostage in the night.
Spiked hair, a little fat, the gang member was more annoyed than intimidated by Light's presence. "You know we'll fucking kill you, right?"
"You guys always say that, but it's getting kind of boring."
"You're just a fucking nigger."
"See?" Light said, "that's another thing, why do you guys only use the N-word as an insult? It doesn't offend me, and there are way better insults you guys can use. I'm actually more offended by how uncreative it is. Like, can't you think of something clever? Are Nazis just lazy, or stupid?"
"Fuck you!" The gang member yelled, "fuck you and fuck all of your fucking kind!"
Light raised an eyebrow, "wait, did me calling you stupid offend you? What are you, a Nazi or a snowflake?"
XXX
Present - Near Amelia Dallon's house
Aryana and Lisa walked together in silence. Aryana had given up her Sherlock Holmes look. Lisa without her domino mask made her look like a regular teenager. Walking across the streets at night made them look like regular teenagers staying out late. The silence made Lisa surprisingly uncomfortable.
"Scion saved me when I was five years old," Aryana said it in a quiet tone. She'd told herself the story a dozen times, and she was telling it again for Lisa's sake. "Our apartment was burning, and Scion came down to me as a light, he pulled me and my brother out."
Lisa stared at Aryana for a moment. There wasn't a reason she was saying this. No ulterior motive. It was just a desperate attempt to connect to Lisa. It wasn't to garner sympathy or compassion, it was moreso to pass the time, and to help Lisa understand a fundamental to herself.
"I remember seeing him as the flames surrounded us, I held my brother in my arms, and Scion came down to save me. Thing is, when I saw him for the first time, I was scared. Like, maybe he was the devil. His face was so clear, it seemed scary to me. When he picked me up to save me, Vivan sat on the ground crying. He was too young to remember, but I distinctly remember kicking and screaming at Scion's face to let me go, just so that I could take my brother with me."
A street light flickered from where they walked.
"He didn't let go of me, I managed to grab Vivan by the arm so that we could both be saved. While me and Vivan survived, forty other people weren't saved by the fire. Scion could've saved everyone, but he only saved us...
It's not fair, why did he save us but not everyone else? Why did he save me, when I just grew up to have my life ruined by the one that looked like an angel? Worst of all, I don't know if I love or I hate Scion. Because I hate that he saved me, I really wish I'd burned back then and he'd saved someone else. I hate how he only wanted to save me but not Vivan, and yet… If he hadn't come for me, Vivan would've burned too…"
Amy's house was now in view. Just a few blocks down the street, Aryana stopped in her tracks to speak. "If I could go back and change one thing, I'd make myself live like Simurgh had never touched me."
"We don't get that option," Lisa said kindly.
"You've asked that question, right? Everyone has, what would you do if you could go back?"
Lisa's powers filled in the gaps;
She's envious I haven't been damaged like she has
Sees me as she saw herself under Accord's wing
Lisa almost said something, but didn't. The reality of the situation was that she'd worked with Coil for so long, she was convincing herself she was working for a noble cause. Lisa was almost forcing herself to respect him, just to maintain her own composure.
When Lisa didn't answer, Aryana said, "I know I don't like to show it… but for me, love isn't about saying it, or acting like it. It's about pretending it's already there, and knowing it's not gone when people need it the most. I give everyone my acts of love, even if I don't always feel it."
Lisa's power gave the best explanation it could:
Wants to protect youth from experiencing traumas similar to her own
Aryana communicated what she thought, and hoped Lisa's powers would confirm it as truth. "When I see you and Sabrina in costume, I remember myself a few years ago. I bubbled myself into thinking Accord was this good guy, the same way Sabrina bubbled herself into thinking she was part of a good group."
With a sigh, it was at this point Lisa knew it was better to speak honestly than to deflect her opinion as if it were irrelevant. For the first time Lisa became honest, and she opened up to Aryana about how she truly felt. "Aryana, I'm not going to end up like you or Sabrina. My situation is different from you two, I'm far more capable of reading the world around me than other people are. I won't let myself regret the decisions I've made, and I won't let myself fall short due to my own ignorance."
Aryana's face didn't waver. She gave a soft nod, and walked forward to Amy's hourse. Lisa's powers spelled out her explicit expression:
Nostalgia; Aryana had told herself those exact same words before
Before walking passed Lisa, Aryana said, "I really, really, hope you're not wrong..."
Lisa stayed silent;
Doesn't believe I'll be alright
Wants me to be alright
Lisa murmured, "reading you is like reading a rubiks cube…"
Present - Somewhere else
Light stared at him for longer. He wasn't saying anything anymore. The E88 member let the blood rush to his head, but being hung upside down was hardly a problem for the hardened gang member.
"I've raped bitches," the gang member said to him. Light stayed quiet. He kept hearing what he said. "Colored bitches too, just to see them fucking scream."
Light was feeling… Detached? Was that a good thing or a bad thing? That he wasn't impacted by his words?
"I love fucking the easy bitches, especially if they're kids."
He had a sneer to his smile, like he was satisfied by his own words, and he wanted more than anything for Light react. The statements might've been lies, but Light could never know for sure.
"I can't do it," Light finally said.
"Can't do what?" The gang member said. "Kill me? Is it because you're a fucking pussy?"
He lifted his chin and tried spitting and Light's face. Light tilted his head to avoid the saliva. Light answered, "no, I think I can do that. It's the other thing I can't do."
A portal appeared behind Light. The light glowed in the alleyway before Uber stepped out of it. He had on gym clothes and a domino mask providing minimal secrecy for his secret identity. "Light," Uber said, "what the hell?"
Light stayed quiet. Uber stared at the hanging E88 member, he asked, "Light, what the hell are you doing here?"
Cortana had told Uber that Light had gone out. Worried about his psychological state, she watched Light and contacted Uber the moment she felt he'd do something he'd regret.
Uber asked again, "Vivan," Uber said again, "what the fuck are you doing here, and what the hell are you planning on doing with that guy?"
XXX
Present - Amelia's house
Lisa knocked at the door. To her surprise, it was a complete stranger that answered. Buzzkill Lisa told herself. The girl had glasses that looked like she'd hastily put them on, her civilian clothes were wrinkled, like she'd just changed into them. She pushed up her glasses at the sight of Lisa, "um… Are you here for Sabrina?"
"Rune," Lisa said with a smile. "And yes, yes we are."
Taylor almost asked who she was, but it felt out of place to ask that. She looked over at Aryana, "erm… Have we met before?"
Aryana looked up from the ground. "Yeah," Aryan replied, "we've met before."
Aryana and Lisa walked in. Victoria and was out of costume, wearing pajamas for the night and cleaning he living room for when their parents would arrive tomorrow. Aryana stared at Victoria, but didn't say anything.
Victoria decided to stay quiet, worried anything she'd say would get recorded.
"Nice place you got here," Lisa said, fully in control. "You know it's polite to offer tea to guests."
Victoria glared at her, already not liking her arrogance. "Right," Victoria said with her fists clenched, "I'll heat up some water."
She headed toward the kitchen, and Lisa took a glance at Taylor. "Nice backpack, but you really should go something that's more your color. You'd look far better in warm clothes in the summer instead of shades of grey."
Taylor blinked at her, "I'm not gay," she said, wondering if that 'shades of grey' line was something Rush would say.
Lisa glared at Aryana and said, "you ruin everything."
Aryana was fidgeting, biting her nails as she waited. "I know."
The sounds of steps came, Sabrina slowly descended the stairway, with Amy following behind her.
Sabrina was healed, wearing sweat clothes that were just her size. She was completely physically able again, except there were wide 'x' marked slashes running across her face. Aryana and Lisa immediately knew what the scars represented, and didn't bother asking why Amy hadn't healed them.
Rush swallowed at the sight of her, "Sabrina… can you speak?"
She didn't say anything.
Aryana swallowed. "Sabrina, please tell me-"
"Why'd you do it?" Sabrina said. Her voice came out soft. It was more like a croak,, like she didn't want to talk but she forced it out.
"What?"
"Why'd you do it?" Sabrina said again.
Aryana blinked at her, "do what?"
Sabrina's fists clenched, "this!" She pointed to her face. "Everything! You ruined everything! Everything you've ever done, all the bullshit you did, it's fucked over everything!"
Sabrina's tears came next. "You ruined everything! My parents want me dead, my uncle got killed. I've been beaten, shamed and tossed around like a bitch! I have nobody left in my life, nobody!"
Sabrina stepped closer to Aryana. Glory Girl almost intervened to prevent violence, but Lisa quickly put a hand on her shoulder to pull her back.
Sabrina yelled directly at Aryana's face, "I am ruined because of you. You, the bastards who fuck over everyone. The shitheads that got me attacked by my own family. The ones who fucked with the E88." it was almost a plea, and a self reminder of her new reality. It hurt too much to fight, so she only offered Aryana her words of hate. "All because of your bastard family! I hope you fucking die, and I wish you never came to Brockton Bay!"
Sabrina's mouth was trembling. Aryana stayed quiet as the crying overwhelmed her. Sabrina said, "you people ruined my life…"
Aryana only offered frowned. As the rest of them eyed them both in silence, Lisa commented, "you're really preaching to the choir here."
Present - Somewhere else
Light said, "When I was a kid, before my parents divorced and before my dad committed suicide, my dad always said these same things to me.
He said, 'son, don't ever hate anyone. Because we are all angels on this earth whether we know it or not. You can't hate anyone because we were all born the same, and for every bad person in this world, it's only a tragedy that they strayed away from the light.'
He'd tell me to pretend there are angel wings on people's back, and that it was absolutely important to live like everyone was an angel. And for the people that hate me the most… I should only pity them."
"Fuck you," the Nazi said. Light still wasn't impacted.
Light continued, "I can't see people as anything other than angels. For every angry person, I see a confused angel. For every depressed person, I see a crying angel. In the end I see everyone the same, as valuable people on this earth, with angel wings behind their backs.
Light stared directly at the E88 member's eyes. "I don't know why I'm here, but I think I came here to see if I could hate you. I talked to you, to see if you could make me hate you…. And I can't do it, I see you just like everyone else. No matter how much you tried, you can't make me hate you."
"I hope your kind die," The gang member sneered.
Light said, "I hope your kind learn."
Light took out a recorder from his pocket and placed it in front of the man's head. He'd call the police to pick him up after they both left. Light nodded to Uber, and he said, "respawn to base."
XXX
Present - Amelia's home
"You asked me what my race is…," Aryana said. "I won't tell you, but I'll give you a hint. My parents are Muslim."
Aryana walked closer to Sabrina. She stared at her with dull eyes, and nearly hissed when she spoke. "My parents are Muslim… And you went to juvie for burning down a mosque."
A silence passed through the room. The statement caught Sabrina off guard. Both the fact of her religion, and the fact that Aryana knew about her criminal background.
Aryana gritted her teeth, "if you think I took you in fun, I wouldn't be here in the first place. Because if I were the slightest bit petty, I would've loved watching the shit get kicked out of you last weekend. If you honestly still believe it's my fault all that shit happened to you, then they should've fucked with your body longer than just three fucking days."
Sabrina's mouth opened slowly, "I wish, you both died… You and Vivan both."
"Get in line," Aryana sneered. "The whole world wasted their time on you. Me, Vivan, the E88. Every group you ever joined was your own choice and all the bullshit that followed was your fault too. You can't deny it... You could've walked away from all those things, but you never did. If you're honestly telling me you blame anyone except yourself, you're stupider than the Nazis who believe in that racist bullshit."
She left it at that. Sabrina's face was contorted. At the end of the day, she only wanted someone else to blame. She'd been broken on so many levels, she wasn't sure if she could handle blaming herself.
Victoria, Amy, and Taylor watched the villains intently. The spectacle clearly had nothing to do with them, but their presence didn't stop them from speaking their minds.
Amy wanted nothing more than for them to leave. Between constant worry of getting exposed, and the exhaustion Victoria had put her through, Amy said, "I think she's right... You're the ones who put her here."
Aryana snapped her head at Amy, "don't even get me started with you, miss I'm-misses-special. Because as pissed as you are with me, it's fucked up how you only healed her because of that tape, instead of the goodness of your soul. At the end of the day, you're just as much of a liar as I am."
"Tape?" Lisa and Taylor asked.
Amy swallowed. Victoria yelled, "take that back!"
Victoria almost pounced at Aryana, but a trail of bugs formed between Victoria and Aryana. "Stop," Taylor said as her bugs spoke. "We're not here to fight."
Taylor looked over at Sabrina staring back at them, she looked at Taylor eyed in surprise. Taylor said, "we're just trying to help you."
Sabrina stared at her, and then at Victoria and Amy. Everyone in this room wanted what was best for her, which was why they all pitched in to save her.
Lisa decided now was the best way speak up. "Sabrina," Lisa said, "I… know of a team that can take you in. They don't do dangerous work, true neutral, if we're talking the morality chart… It's not like the E88, and not as unpredictable as the Losers… You can give it a try, if you'd like."
Sabrina blinked at her. Sabrina asked Aryana, "what am I supposed do? What's it supposed to mean?"
XXX
One Year Ago
Aryana was in a box. It was black, temperate room temperature. Since it was built by a tinker Aryana could assume there were traps waiting for her if she tried to leave. Accord had just ordered her to sit inside of it. He didn't say why or gave a reason, it was just an order and she'd been trained to oblige.
How many days had passed since the Fallen had returned her? She'd lost count after the third. Aryana was beginning to suspect there were no traps waiting for her outside. Similar to how you can tie a horse to a chair and it wouldn't run away, Aryana probably could've escaped easily but was mentally unwilling to do so.
What happened before the Fallen had taken her? Oh yeah, she messed up on a mission. It was practically a suicide mission, but she hardly remembered it because the month had just blended together into a giant blur.
Staying quiet in the box was a different experience altogether. Staying in a single place with nothing more than being alone with her own thoughts, that hurt more than getting beaten up by the Fallen. Because her freshest memories were now her worst memories.
She also had time to reminisce on every tiny mistake she'd ever made. Every detail of every event that had gone wrong in her whole life. She couldn't stop thinking of her dad's suicide which caused her trigger, Scion's light, and the Simurgh encounter. She also thought of when she first joined Accord, and everything that had gone wrong in her life afterwards.
The numbness, she recognized it now. It was easier to feel nothing than to feel pain. But another question popped up; why wasn't she thinking of the good thoughts? Had all the emotional suffering entered in her like a tidal wave, and washed away all the kind moments that existed in the mind?
She wasn't sure, but once the emotional pain filled her in completely, there was an emptiness. A calmness. The normalcy of pain made her tolerance of pain more resilient. And with the absolvement of pain, the peaks that happiness gave her were suddenly colorless.
You can't feel pain if you don't have happiness to compare it from. You can't feel happiness, if you don't embrace pain to compare it from.
Thinking in this box was her punishment, but she learned to choose how to think. She could choose to let her mind think bad, or will it to think calm. She rocked her body back and forth, and pretended pain never fazed her.
Accord opened the box door, which was equivalent to opening a black vault. A light leaned down at her with Accord's back against the sunlight. He was a shadow between her and a blinding light. He asked, "what did you learn?"
It was at that moment that Aryana knew. Accord arranged for everything, for the mission to fail, for the Fallen to take her, just so he'd have a reason to put her inside this black box and ask her that question.
Aryana was had shown signs of growth, change, of becoming more than what Accord wanted, and he demanded it be snuffed out from her.
Aryana answered, "my life story doesn't have to be a tragedy, it will only be so if I let it."
It wasn't the answer he expected, so he closed the door, and would ask again in a few days.
XXX
Present - Amelia's house
"Your story isn't special," Aryana said in a softer tone. "No one's story is, we look for answers and never find them. But I think… You deserve more than what the world tells you. Everyone deserves that."
Sabrina looked over at Amy, then at Lisa. She asked, "what would you do in my shoes?"
Aryana wasn't sure. The last thing she wanted to do was to sound manipulative and greedy. "I'd sleep on it," Aryana answered, "we don't make the best choices when we make them on a whim."
Sabrina swallowed, "how's… Vivan?"
"He misses you," Aryana answered. "We all do, if I'm being honest."
A lump in her throat festered, she missed having friends.
XXX
Present - Losers base
"How do you do it," Vivan asked. Robert and Vivan stood outside the apartment entrance, waiting for Aryana and Lisa at three am.
Robert answered, "I don't know, I guess I sort of just figured things out. Figured out that the world is crazy, and we can either do nothing, get sad about it, or laugh about it. I'm not gonna complain all day about everything I don't have control over, it's boring to sit around and do nothing. So at the end of the day, I'd just rather laugh about everything that goes wrong."
Vivan asked, "I really want to think like that. I want to think like there's a reason I have to be happy… but it's getting so hard, I feel myself becoming colder, number and I don't like it, I don't like how I'm changing."
"It does sort of just happen," Robert admitted. "Pretend for long enough, and the mask feels comfortable. You eventually realize that what you were pretending is exactly who you love to be. It's different for everyone, but it's important as hell that you don't force yourself into something you're not."
Robert chuckled, "y'know, I think I remember the first time I laughed hard at something really stupid that happened to me. I was at an Endbringer event, and I was doing CPR on a girl who'd nearly drowned from the Leviathan.
Nearly three weeks after that happened, I was in the math class thinking what had happened. After thinking back at her, I yelled in the middle of class, 'holy shit that was my first kiss!'"
Vivan bursted out laughing, "what?"
Robert grinned. It was a stupid realization at a stupid time, but the absurdity of it made him laugh hard that day. "People were confused as hell at why I said that."
"Christ," Vivan said grinning, "like you just realized that, and said it for no reason?"
Robert chuckled, "yeah, I liked screwing around in school."
Vivan asked, "did you ever get her name?"
Robert tapped his chin, "actually yeah, she was called the White Rabbit. She was a villain, so there was no way I'd ever see her again."
Vivan's blinked at him. 'The White Rabbit,' that was his sister's old alias. She'd gone to Endbringer attacks with Accord's permission, so it was completely possible that Robert and Aryana had indirectly met before. Her bursted out laughing again.
"Whats so funny now?" Robert asked.
Vivan could barely breathe, "white rabbit!"
Robert scratched his chin with a smiled, "yeah, I guess it is a stupid name."
By the time Vivan could catch his breath, Aryana and Lisa were within sight of walking towards the base. Vivan's head snapped up, and he ran towards the both of them. He asked, "where is she?"
"Amy healed her," Lisa answered. "I'll be honest, I don't know where she'll go next."
"She might or might not come," Aryana said. "I told her our doors are open for her anytime, either as a member or as a non-member."
Aryana embraced Vivan for a hug. She held him tightly, and forgot how long it had been since she'd hugged him. Several years? Since she was fifteen?
"I'm so sorry," Aryana said, "for everything."
Vivan hugged her back, he didn't say anything more.
XXX
Present - Rooftop
Aryana sat on the ledge of the rooftop. She swung her feet of the ledge, not bothering to do her 'trust' exercise this time. Emily took a seat next to her, and stared off into the sky with her.
"Hey," Aryana said.
"Hey," Emily replied.
They stared off the distance for a bit, letting the cloudy sky glow underneath the full moon. Aryana asked, "so how was your day?"
Without an answer, Emily grabbed Aryana from the side and hugged her tightly. She hugged her so hard it almost felt like she couldn't breathe, "er, Emily, tightness."
Emily was crying now, "I'm so sorry."
What was she apologizing for? Aryana wondered, "its um… okay?"
Once she was ready to let go, Emily released her grip sat back next to her wiping away her tears.
"You gonna be okay champ?" Aryana fist bumped her shoulder.
Emily nodded, sniffling she asked, "are you?"
Aryana nodded with a calm smile. "Yeah, I think I'm gonna be alright."
Aryana let out a deep breathe. She laid back on the ground and stared upwards. "You know, I'm actually feeling better than I ever have before."
She closed her eyes in the darkness. "I'm feeling… so much more everything than I ever have before. I've faked these feelings for so long, faked pretending to be something I'm not. I was always cold, lying to myself and to the world around me."
Her hands slid onto her own face, she rubbed at her skin like it was softer than it actually was. "But this mask is disappearing. It's fading, and it's becoming a part of me instead of an act. It's melting away and filling in all the cracks of me that were always broken. I feel more real than I've ever felt before. And it scares the shit out of me."
Light tears rolled down her face as she smiled up at the moon. "I'm caring more about people I never thought I'd care about, and I love it because I can experience it better. But I'm also scared I'll lose everything. Because I've been proven time and time again, capes can only have bad endings."
Emily looked at Aryana's tears. It was a mixture of happy revelation and morbid realization. Emily shook her head and said, "no, Aryana. Capes only have bad beginnings, not bad endings. Just because cape endings can end bad, it doesn't means the wholeness of the story has to be a tragedy... You taught me that."
Aryana smiled at the thought of that. She was loving her team more and more.
XXX
Author's Note: I'm done! I had a few more arcs prepared, buuuut... I kind of want to focus my time on writing original fiction. I still love fanfiction, but this is going to be the best spot I can leave this at. If I ever do write more to this team, it'll be in the form of a sequel. So keep an ear out for "The Three Mousketeers", because a sequel is more likely to come out in Taylor's perspective in this world.