A/N: A shorter update today, for getting some info out there that really had to be covered.
To those of you who are snowed in, please stay safe! xx
CSotA
The rest of the week passed quietly, providing a welcome vacation for Elsie. Had she been home, she'd have found a multitude of things to do on the farm; being in England, however, she'd read three books, had napped twice, and she and Charles had walked miles, hand in hand, along the shoveled paths of the Crawley estate. She felt rested and rejuvenated, two things she rarely felt following the February school vacation week.
She was smiling about this very thing when her phone buzzed, pulling her out of her fireside musings. She put her book face-down in her lap and reached for the device, swiping it to see a text from Charles:
On our way.
She quickly texted back:
Did you have fun?
He took a moment to reply, and she wondered if he'd just gotten in the car. But, no, after about five minutes her phone buzzed again, twice; she couldn't believe it - Charles never sent more than six words at a time, but she was looking at a paragraph that came in two separate chunks:
(1) It was interesting. Office things worked out fine, but change in plans. I need a drink, I can say that. Had lunch at a lovely pub. D and I just
(2) left the museum and will be about half an hour before we are back at the house. I'm tired, and you and I need to talk. Alone.
Elsie's brow furrowed. Charles had been at a meeting to look into selling his law firm, after which he'd taken Daisy to lunch and then to their favorite museum so that they could spend some father/daughter time together. But his message made it seem like something bad had happened.
Is everything alright? she quickly typed back.
Yes, I think so.
Okay, she replied quickly. I'll be waiting, and we have brandy. :)
She put her phone aside and stood up to stretch, then made her way to the kitchen to fetch a snack. She found some biscuits and plated them up, then brought them back upstairs and set them on the side table, directly next to the brandy set-up.
Somehow, she had a feeling they'd be talking for a while.
True to his word, Charles was back in about half an hour. She heard the small commotion downstairs as Daisy and Marigold found one another and headed off to play video games. Charles's footsteps were slow coming down the hallway, and he courteously knocked softly on the door to their suite before opening it and letting himself in.
He turned to lock it, though, and that was what made Elsie suspicious. She stood and headed over to where he was standing by the door.
"Charles, what is it? Has something bad happened?"
He met her eyes and extended his hands, which she grasped in her own before kissing the back of his knuckles.
"No, everything is fine, actually … I think."
"But you said you needed a drink, and that we had to talk. That didn't sound good, Charles."
She moved to the table and poured two snifters of brandy, then handed him one and pointed to the sofa by the fire. "Sit," she commanded, and he obeyed with a smirk. "Now, talk."
Charles took a slow sip of his drink, mulling over where to start.
"Business or personal?" he asked, putting the decision in her hands.
"Start with the business, I think," she said slowly. Personal? What on Earth ...?
"Well," he began, "He's interested. Very interested, actually. He has a silent investor and has made me an offer - a rather generous one at that."
"Really? Charles, that's wonderful! This is the new solicitor that started before you left?" She remembered Charles talking about him, a smart young man named Kent, she thought. "Ambitious, I recall you saying."
"Yes, but he's truly done well. He said he has the funds, and we talked details. He'd like to have it done by the end of the month, Elsie."
"Are you kidding?" she gasped. "Are you even ready for that?"
He pursed his lips, staring into the fire for a moment before he answered.
"I think so, yes," he said softly. He turned toward her and rested his hand on the sofa between them, palm side up, and she placed her own inside his, smiling when he squeezed her fingers as he continued.
"It would be a quick retirement, although he and his investor would like to consider opening a new branch in Boston, and having me available as a consultant on cases of a trickier nature, perhaps assisting if they needed an extra man on deck. But basically, yes, I'd be fully retired."
"Well, that is something," Elsie mused. "Whatever would you do?"
He mulled over his answer, finding that he still had yet to consider all the possibilites. "I haven't even thought that far ahead, really - no time. I like the idea of being able to attend all of Daisy's school things, of being able to be on holiday when the two of you are off, not having to worry about whether or not I'm working on a case; that freedom is certainly a great bonus to the situation. I could take up a hobby, I suppose - walk more, perhaps see what volunteer opportunities there are in Misty Cove." He laughed, a short, bark of a noise that made Elsie jump a bit. "I never thought I'd retire at fifty, that's for sure! But the offer is too generous, and I'd be a fool to turn it down. I'd never need to work again."
"And they plan to do all this by the end of this month? How could that even happen?" Elsie enquired.
"Well, that's the tricky part," he hedged, and she waited patiently as he got up and refilled both their glasses.
"Oh, I don't think I should," Elsie protested, but he shoved the glass in her hand anyhow.
"No, trust me, you'll need it," he answered cryptically, so she acquiesced. She leaned back into the corner of the sofa and pulled up her legs, crossing them in front of her as she cradled the snifter in her hands.
"Okay," she said slowly.
"They'd like me to stay into next week," he said, sitting back down. "More than likely, I'd be here until at least Thursday, perhaps longer."
"Oh!" Elsie exclaimed. "But Daisy …?"
Charles nodded, anticipating her concern. "Yes, Daisy will need to return for school. That is snag number one."
"And she wants to stay with Marigold, I presume? Which I am sure Edith wouldn't mind at all, if you asked her. I'd be surprised if the girls aren't already plotting it, assuming Daisy knows what you've told me."
"She knows, but I'm not sure if that will be possible."
"Oh?" Elsie was getting more and more confused as the minutes ticked by. "Is everything alright? I haven't even seen Edith today, now that you mention it …"
"I'm sure you haven't - Daisy said she's not been feeling very well, which is why I'm not sure having Daisy around her would be a good idea. I was wondering … well," he hedged, "I was wondering if Daisy could return and stay with you."
"Oh! Um, yes, of course." Elsie flitted through details in her mind: spare room, appointment on Wednesday, same schedule, I'll have Anna stock the kitchen …
"Are you sure?" Charles looked decidedly unsure, and she chuckled softly, reaching out to lay her hand on his knee.
"Of course I'm sure," she said softly. "It makes sense, really, as she'd have been coming over for therapy on Wednesday anyhow. And we're obviously on the same school schedule. Did you discuss it with her at all?"
"Actually," he said with a small smile and a raised eyebrow, "it was her idea."
"Really?" Elsie beamed, a sense of pride filling her chest that Daisy would want to spend a week with her when Charles was an ocean away.
"It was," he said. "Although I am afraid that now steers us into the second bit of this conversation."
He looked decidedly uncomfortable, fiddling with a bit of lint on his knee as Elsie nibbled on her lip. "Go on, then," she finally encouraged him, thoroughly confused now as to what she was missing.
Charles took a deep breath before looking back into her eyes. She spotted a softness in his own, and tilted her head as she contemplated it.
"Edith isn't feeling well because she's pregnant, Els."
Elsie's face lit up and a smile emerged on her lips ... but Charles couldn't miss the flicker of sadness that passed through her eyes just before it happened, some ghost of a thing that she, perhaps, thought had been long-since laid to rest.
"Well," she breathed, shaking her head slightly, "that certainly didn't take long! They must be so very, very happy."
"I think so," Charles hedged.
But then Elsie thought of something. "Wait … but how did you know?"
"From Daisy, who got it from Marigold," he said, a bit uncomfortable now. "Evidently they had quite the discussion the night before last," he added in a murmur, a blush now creeping up his neck and over his cheeks, turning the tips of his ears bright red.
"About the baby?" Elsie asked.
"Well, y- yes," he stammered, "and, more specifically, how it got there."
At that, Elsie threw her head back and laughed. "Oh, Charles! Oh, goodness, you poor thing! And Daisy asked you for details, of course."
He nodded, a sheepish look on his face.
"Wait ... do you mean you'd never explained any of that to her before?" She shook her head, a look of mirth now in her eyes as she contemplated her gentle love of a man.
He looked at her with something akin to horror on his face. "Elsie! She's eight years old!"
"Almost nine," Elsie reminded him. "Oh, Charles … they're finding out about it all so much younger these days, you know. With television and movies," she said, shaking her head. "Did she truly not know?"
"She knew some things," he explained. "Very vague things, mind you, about how when two people love each other and decide to have a child, they are sometimes blessed by one, and …" he trailed off. "No, she didn't know the specifics. She does now, though, or most of it anyhow."
Elsie stretched her legs out and placed her feet in his lap. He absentmindedly began to rub them, causing her to lean her head back and moan in delight.
"That feels remarkable," she purred, and he smiled.
"Good, I'm glad one of us is comfortable," he said, taking another sip of his drink before placing the glass on the side table. "Because there's more to my mortification, Elsie." He tilted his chin at her drink. "Bottoms up."
She complied with questioning grin, then passed him her glass so that he could place it with his own. And then the penny dropped, and she sat bolt upright and gasped.
"Oh my God!" she whispered, eyes wide and mouth open in shock. It was her turn to blush, Charles noted with some small trace of satisfaction.
"Yes, she has managed to put that together as well," he said, shaking his head.
Elsie nodded very slowly, swallowed a couple of times, and ventured, "You mean … " She pointed to Charles and back at herself. "She asked if we … oh, my God, Charles!" she repeated, and he laughed a bit.
"I think that was the look I had," he said, a smirk on his lips as he pointed to her face. "Mind you, she doesn't have all the details of how it all goes, but she knows enough of them."
"And here we are, sharing a bed with her down the hall," she whispered. "Oh, remind me to kill Violet for suggesting this!"
"I don't think it's been that bad, really," Charles muttered. "I think it's been rather lovely."
"Well, yes, but ... Oh, Charles," she said, shaking her head to clear it, "what did she say? I suppose that's what's really important, and not me sitting here trying to contemplate facing your daughter now she knows I've been doing those types of things with her dear Papa!"
He placed Elsie's feet on the floor and scooted over to her, putting his arm around her shoulder as she tucked herself in next to his body. He reached over to take her hand in his and he kissed it slowly, then placed it back in her lap, not letting go.
"She wasn't upset, Elsie. In fact … well … she wanted to know if we would be having a baby as well," he said gently, knowing there was no easy way out of it all now.
Elsie looked up at him, and her eyes filled, a sad smile on her lips. "Of course she did," she whispered, rolling her eyes lightly. "And why wouldn't she? Charlie, what did you tell her?"
"I told her that you are not pregnant," he said. "I didn't explain anything about it, but told her that wasn't something we were ready for. I didn't worry about whether or not it was even a possibility at the moment, but I had to tell her something, and that seemed to appease her."
Elsie's teeth clamped down on her lip tightly, and she nodded. "Good," she said, sniffling. "That's good."
Charles's heart broke as he watched her thoughts play out so plainly on her face. He reached up and cupped her chin, drawing her in for a soft kiss and then pulling back slowly.
"Elsie," he said quietly, pushing her tears away with his thumb.
She shook her head. "Don't," she pleaded. "Don't pity me, Charles. I'll be fine with Edith. I presume she'll be telling the family before we leave?"
He nodded.
"Alright, then," she said, taking a deep breath.
Charles dreaded what he had to ask next, but knew there was no way out of it. He had to be sure they were on the same page, that they possessed the same information should Daisy begin asking questions again.
"Elsie, love ... well … we haven't exactly been careful. Is there a possibility that …"
She looked up and saw only a deep, honest questioning in his eyes. She didn't see a trace of pity or sorrow for her difficult past, and for that she was grateful.
"It's extremely unlikely, given my history," she said sadly.
And then a thought occurred to her, a thought so simple in nature that she'd no idea how she had never considered it before. "Oh, Charles," she whispered, "do you want another child?"
He took in her appearance: the red splotches on her chest, from emotion mixed with leftover embarrassment, the teary eyes, the lips now puffy and red from crying and from her merciless niggling. He reached out slowly and took a loose strand of her hair, tucking it gently behind her ear.
"I never did before," he said. "It just didn't make sense, really - we never even expected to have Daisy, of course, and then it was clear that she'd be an only child. Not my choice, but I understood completely."
"And now?" she whispered, the sadness in her eyes crushing his heart.
Charles pulled her in close and wrapped his arms tightly around her, kissing her head as he held her.
"I think you know how I feel about you, Elsie," he began, murmuring into her hair and feeling the minute nod of her head. "I entered into this relationship with you having no expectations of that, none at all, given what you have been through. But it would be a lie to say that, if we were given the chance, it would not make me happy."
"And given that it will not be happening, most likely? Can you still be happy with me?" she asked, tightening her grip on his torso, fearful of his answer. "Because clearly I was not meant to be a mother," she whispered.
"I disagree," he murmured, loosening his hold on her and tilting her head up so that she would be forced to meet his gaze again. "I think you are already proving that you have the mettle to be an excellent one. Not all mothers give birth to their children, Elsie," he added, leaning down to drop a kiss to her quivering lips.
"I am happy with you, Els. You are what I want. The rest? Well, I say we leave it in the hands of God and see what happens. Because if there's any one thing I do know, it's that I'm not going anywhere. Not for as long as you'll have me."
Elsie moved out of his embrace and shifted her body, straddling him as she drew his head and shoulders into her embrace. She knew he could hear the accelerated beating of her heart, and she carded her fingers through his hair before kissing his head repeatedly.
"I am so thankful for you, Charles. Every day. For your kindness, and your understanding. For your love, and - most of all - for your accepting me just as I am, for not asking me to be anything other than this imperfect person who now holds you in her arms," she said tearfully.
He squeezed her tightly and sighed. "You were brought into my life for a reason, Elsie - I truly believe that." He leaned back to look into her eyes, his hands dropping and clasping loosely at the small of her back. "We're none of us perfect, love. For all that you've just said, you should know that it is you who have saved me."
"Well," she said quietly, leaning in for another kiss, "perhaps we've saved each other."
A/N: Please leave a little review if you feel so inclined. x