Sameen kicked off her heels and dropped into a chair in the living room. Thanksgiving was the most pointless holiday. Everyone had to dress up and hang out and Aunt Marla always tried to kiss her cheeks. Not to mention Harold and Grace had come this year. Sameen rolled her eyes; it was bad enough she had to deal with Harold in class, but now he was at her house.
She glanced across the room at Root, who was sitting on the couch, her feet tucked up under her. Sameen had to admit that she looked nice, her blue dress complimenting her skin tone. Running through Root's closet in her head, Sameen realized that she'd never seen this dress before. When had Root gotten it?
Root stared at her for a moment before climbing to her feet. Sameen watched as Root approached her and debated standing up. Before she could decide, a girl ran into the room and covered Root's eyes from behind.
Sameen shot to her feet when Root jumped, defensive.
"Guess who?" the girl asked.
Root's scowled turned into a grin and she screamed, spinning around. She and the girl jumped in place and threw their arms around each other.
"You actually came?" Root exclaimed. "I can't believe it!"
"Believe it!" The girl laughed and pulled Root into a hug again.
Sameen frowned at them, crossing her arms. Who was the chick? She was cute, Sameen would give her that, with her curly brown hair and her stupid chubby cheeks that made her look adorable. If Sameen wasn't so angry that she was touching Root, she might have called the girl hot, in her dumb flower dress.
John walked over to her. "That's Hanna," he said. "Root's old best friend."
Sameen's eyes widened and her jealousy doubled. Hanna? What was that bitch doing here? Didn't she like die or something?
"Do you know what she's doing here?" Sameen hissed.
John just shrugged. "No. I mean, I know Root had started talking to her again, but I didn't think she'd actually come back to Bishop. Her uncle still lives here. She might be visiting him for the holidays."
Sameen glared at Hanna across the room. Hanna had abandoned Root and now she had the audacity to try and be friends again. That girl has some nerve.
Hanna pushed Root's hair away from her ear and looked at something on her neck.
"A tattoo?" Hanna gasped. "Wow!"
Root moved to Hanna's other side. "I'm deaf in that ear, sorry. What did you say?"
Sameen walked across the room in quick steps and joined the other girls. She ignored Hanna and turned to face Root, crossing her arms.
"You got a tattoo?" Sameen asked her. "When?"
Root looked sheepish. "I gave it to myself a couple weeks ago. I set up a bunch of mirrors so I could see."
"Can I look at it?"
Root nodded and turned her head, lifting her hair. Behind her right ear was a small megaphone with an 'X' next to it. Sameen realized it was a mute symbol, like on a computer. She had to admit, it was both clever and cute. Hanna's hand came into view and she ran her finger over the tattoo.
"That's so cool, Root," Hanna said.
Sameen knocked her hand away. "She can't hear you from this side."
Hanna frowned and moved to Root's other side. She offered Sameen her hand.
"I'm Hanna, Root's best friend."
Sameen took her hand, squeezing a little harder than necessary. "I'm Sameen, Root's…current best friend." She dropped Hanna's hand.
"That's funny," Hanna tilted her head. "She hasn't mentioned you."
Wincing, Sameen turned away and stalked back to her seat. Root hadn't mentioned her to Hanna. They'd been friends for two years and Root hadn't mentioned her at all. Sameen tried to tell herself that Root and Hanna hadn't talked at all during that time and they'd only reconnected, but still. She was important to Root. She should be important to Root.
Hanna turned to Root and smiled. "Come on, let's ditch this funeral. I want to see if our clubhouse is still there."
Root met Sameen's eyes and Sameen knew she was trying to figure out how Sameen felt. Sameen felt…numb. It was a welcome relief from the turmoil of the past couple of months. Sameen wanted to tell Root to stay, but she couldn't. She was tired of looking weak in front of everyone.
Root nodded to Hanna and they left the room. A moment later, the front door closed loudly.
"Wait," Lionel spoke up from in front of the television, "we can leave? Anyone want to get ice cream?"
Sameen scowled. "Ice cream isn't on your nutrition plan, numbnut."
"Ouch," Lionel rolled his eyes. "I'm not your girlfriend, dude. Don't be rude."
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It had taken Sameen almost a week to get Root's birthday present together, but as she held it in her hands, she was pretty satisfied. She almost hadn't gotten anything, but Root had been nicer this week and Sameen wanted to show that she noticed. They didn't have any plans for the night, but she was going to invite Root to go out.
Sameen glanced at her phone. School had ended almost an hour ago and Sameen had been hanging out in the parking lot for a while, so she knew Root was still here. What was taking her so long? It was the last day of school before winter break and everyone else was already gone. Sameen sighed and turned to her car just as the front door to the school opened.
She recognized Root's laugh and turned around. Root and Hanna were coming down the steps and Sameen scowled. Why was Hanna here? She didn't even go to school here anymore. Sameen didn't know if she'd been in Root's classes with her.
After Sameen had thrown the cake to the ground, she'd been transferred to all new classes. Principal McCarthy had said that there had been a system error and Sameen had been put in the wrong periods at the beginning of the year. She knew, though, that Root moved her around so they wouldn't have to sit next to each other.
Sameen's hands tightened around the photo album in her hands and she reconsidered the gift. What was the point in following Root around like a dog? She'd had hope before Thanksgiving, but seeing Root so happy with Hanna made her stomach hurt.
Root spotted her across the parking lot and frowned. She turned to whisper something to Hanna and then started towards Sameen, pushing her bag higher on her shoulders. As she got closer, Root smiled.
"Hey," Root started, "were you waiting for me? I was giving Hanna a tour. She never got to see the high school."
"I got you this," Sameen said, briskly. She shoved the photo album into Root's arms. "Happy birthday."
Root ran her hands over the glitter glue letters on the cover. Sameen had made it into something she thought Root would like. It was rainbow and glittery, the words 'Root and Sameen Explore The Universe' written in cursive that had taken Sameen an hour to do. That's what they had named their trip's mixtape and Sameen thought it was fitting to name their album that, too.
"It's got the pictures that I took," Sameen explained. "You never got to see them."
Root held the book to her chest, crossing her arms over it protectively. Looking at Sameen with watery eyes, she smiled.
"Thanks, Sameen. I'll look at it later."
Nodding, Sameen kicked at the gravel on the ground. "We don't have any plans. To celebrate, I mean. Are you going to be home?"
"No," Root said apologetically. "I'm going out with Hanna."
Sameen's eyebrows drew down at Root's choice of words. She was going out with Hanna? Did that mean she was dating Hanna now? Sameen knew that Hanna had been Root's first kiss, but was Hanna actually gay?
"I mean," Root clarified, "Hanna and I are hanging out. We're going to Corpus Christi."
Sameen sighed with relief. She ran a hand over her ponytail, nodding.
"To see Contact? That's what I had planned to do with you."
"Oh," Root breathed. She glanced over her shoulder at Hanna for a second. Turning back to Sameen, she adjusted her grip on the album. "Do you…Um."
Sameen held her breath with anticipation. Root was going to ask her to hang out. The photo album had been a good idea after all. Root winced and shook her head.
"Sorry, I have to go."
She turned on her heel and headed back across the parking lot. Sameen watched as they climbed into a large black range rover. Of course, Hanna was loaded. Her parents were probably fancy doctors and she could buy Root anything her heart desired.
They drove away and Sameen turned back to her car. She seethed, kicking the tire as hard as she could.
"Fuck!"
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Sameen nodded along to the Christmas music playing as she watched Root open her last gift, a boombox from Mrs. Reese that played music as a light show, and took a sip of cocoa. Root had been quiet for most of the morning, only talking when someone thanked her for her gift. It was hard to tell what she was thinking, more so than normal.
If Sameen had to guess, she'd think that Root was hiding her feelings on purpose. Root had always been happy during the holidays, excited for the parties and gifts. These Root was different.
Root glanced at Sameen and pushed her hair behind her ear. Sameen smiled back, trying to seem approachable. Root had almost reached out to her a few days ago in the parking lot and now Sameen had regained some hope. It was hard to keep it up, but Root was starting to open up and it made her feel better.
"So," Mrs. Reese said, grinning at the group, "breakfast?"
Root climbed to her feet, keeping the boombox in her hands. "I have to go. I have an appointment."
Sameen watched her walk out of the room and scowled. She turned back to Mrs. Reese.
"Ok," Sameen said, "that has gotten really annoying, right? Am I the only one?"
Mrs. Reese frowned. "It has gotten a bit out of hand," she agreed. "I'm still a bit upset that she left Thanksgiving dinner without a word."
"Should we talk to her?" John asked from the couch, looking dumb in his matching Christmas pajamas. "Tell her it isn't ok?"
"I'll talk to her," Mrs. Reese sighed. "Let's not worry about it right now." She stood up and put on a smile. "Breakfast?"
The kids stood up and followed her into the kitchen. Mrs. Reese let the boys pass her and walked next to Sameen.
"Are you going to look for her?" Mrs. Reese asked her.
Sameen nodded. "I can bring her back. After breakfast, though. I know you made 1000 pancakes and I'm going to eat every single one."
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Looking up at into the train, Sameen squinted against the midday sun. After breakfast, she'd gone to the hill to look for Root. Root hadn't been there, and she wasn't answering her phone, so Sameen had tried the clubhouse next.
It looked different than the last time she'd been here. Although, that wasn't really surprising. She hadn't been back since before the road trip. Sameen looked at lightbulbs dangling on strings from the ceiling and smiled. It was obvious that this was where Root had been staying lately.
She was here, so she might as well check it out. Sameen turned to the set of wooden stairs someone had built. Had Root made these herself? She put her weight on the first step and they wobbled precariously on the uneven ground. Yup, Root had built them.
Sameen carefully climbed the steps into the train and looked around. To the right of the entrance, tucked back against the far wall was a bed. Well, a mattress on a box spring on the floor. The bed was unmade, of course, but Sameen could see their dark green blanket tangled in the sheets. She was surprised that Root had brought that out here.
Stepping closer, Sameen laughed. Root was using one of Sameen's shirts as a pillowcase. Open on the bed was the photo album Sameen had just given her. Reaching out, Sameen turned the book so she could see it. She smiled. It was open to the pictures of Root naked in the pool at that beautiful Oregon motel. Her skin glowed under the red and yellow neon lights.
There were other signs of Sameen scattered around the bedroom area. A mannequin hand was standing on the small wooden, bedside table. Sameen twisted her ring around her finger when she saw Root's matching one. Root had given it to her last year. The plastic hand was also wearing Root's matching bracelet from their first Christmas.
Sameen stepped on something soft and looked down. Her foot was on top of a bunny slipper; the ones she'd bought Root years ago. Sameen's heart clenched painfully and she took a deep breath. Root was keeping so many reminders of their time together. That had to mean something, right? Maybe Sameen was right not to have given up altogether.
She walked around the bed to a large glass square attached to the wall. Looking it over, she didn't see anything special about it. Was it Root's whiteboard? She didn't see any markers laying around. Sameen reached out to touch the glass and jumped when the glass lit up.
It looked like a computer screen, but Sameen didn't see any buttons.
"What the hell?" she breathed. "What is this?"
Sameen's words appeared on the screen and disappeared again. Several Google search results popped up in front of her. It really was a computer, Sameen realized. Root had built this. 'I'm innovating,' Root had said. Apparently, that was true.
"Uh," Sameen stuttered. "Turn off?"
The display disappeared and the screen was blank again. Shrugging, Sameen made a mental note to ask Root how that worked. It was like something from the future. What else had Root built out here?
Sameen crossed the room, sticking her head outside to look around. She noticed now there was a solar panel attached to the top of the train. A small cable ran inside and disappeared along the floor. Root had found a way to get power into this rusty car.
She ducked back in and moved to the other end of the train. Several posters were stuck to the wall. All the posters John had given her were taped up and a string of Polaroids hung above several stacks of books. Sameen's winced when she saw Root had taped the covers back on to the books she'd destroyed.
There was a mini-fridge in the corner and, on top of it, the boombox Mrs. Reese had just given her. Sameen must have waited too long before going after her. There was a stack of CDs and cassettes next to it. Striding across the room, Sameen looked through them. Most of it was classical music, but one of the cassettes surprised her.
It was their road trip mixtape. Sameen stared at it, her insides churning. This whole train was a monument to their relationship. Root had brought so many memories here and now Sameen could see how Root felt.
Root did love her. Sameen closed her eyes. She had to talk to Root about this and not back down this time. She knew the truth and she wasn't going to let Root push her away. When was the best time to bring it up?
Sameen opened her eyes. The New Year's party. She would find Root there, confess her love, and then they'd kiss at midnight like they did every year. She grinned, putting the cassette back on the stack and turning to look around the train. She felt…hopeful. Her heart beat hard in her chest and Sameen thought she might even feel happy.