Sameen stopped in front of Martine's house and sucked in air. She'd run the half mile from her house to make it before midnight. Pushing her hair out of her face, she looked at her phone – 11:47. She drew another breath and walked into the party.

It had taken her over an hour to get ready; she was determined to look good for her talk with Root; even though she was confident Root wanted to be with her again, Sameen had decided that dressing up couldn't hurt. She walked into the living room, looking around for her friends.

Spotting John's gelled hair above the crowd, she made her way towards them, her heels clicking against the tile floor. The black stilettos made her 5 foot 7, almost as tall as Root, and she was relishing every extra inch. Someone whistled as she passed and a smug grin spread across her face.

"Whoa," Zoe breathed when Sameen stopped in front of her, "you look amazing."

John flushed. "You look hot. It's…weird."

Sameen tossed her curled hair over her shoulder and shrugged. "I am hot, John. All the time."

"I think it's the abs," Lionel threw out. "Intimidating, but appealing."

Laughing, Sameen reached out to tousle his hair. She looked over her shoulder at the people around them. Root was at the party, she knew that, but she didn't see her anywhere.

"Have you seen Root?" she asked, adjusting her crop top on her shoulders. She'd worn the alien crop top Root had given her for Christmas. If that didn't say love, Sameen didn't know what would. "She said she was coming tonight."

"She was with us earlier," Joss said, shrugging.. "Maybe she went upstairs? It's pretty loud."

"Alright," Sameen nodded. "Thanks."

Turning on her heel, Sameen headed back into the hallway to the staircase. She'd only set one foot on the stairs when someone grabbed her arm. Her gaze dropped to the hand on her elbow, then traced along the pale arm to Martine's face. She scowled and ripped her arm away.

"Why are you touching me?" she demanded, annoyed. "I thought I told you to leave us alone."

Martine swallowed. "I know, but…I wouldn't go up there."

"Excuse me?" Sameen turned to face her fully. Her heels and the step gave her almost a foot on Martine. "I know this is your house, but throwing a rager means people wander around."

"I know." Martine crossed her arms. "It's not that."

"Then what?" Sameen asked, impatient. "What could possibly be so important that you had to touch me?"

Martine stared at her for a moment, lips pursed. "You know what? Forget it."

"Whatever." Sameen rolled her eyes and started up the stars again.

She walked down the hallway, sticking her head in various rooms. They'd never come up here before. Normally, she and Root hung out in the living room the whole party. smiled, remembering last Halloween when they'd made out in the downstairs bathroom. She might actually miss Martine's house when they graduated.

The countdown started as Sameen stuck her head into the second to last room, finding it empty. She realized that Root must be in Martine's bedroom. Oh man, Martine's room was probably pink. Once they made up, they could have sex in Martine's bed, just for the satisfaction.

The clock struck midnight and the crowd downstairs started cheering. Smirking, Sameen opened the last door in the hall. Her breath caught in her throat. Root and Hanna were sitting on the bed, hands clasped, in the soft glow of the bedside lamp.

Sameen watched as Hanna reached forward and gently wrapped her fingers around the lapels of Root's leather jacket. She leaned forward to press her lips against Root's and Sameen choked, her heart clenching painfully. Root shot to her feet, eyes wide.

"Sameen-"

Turning away as fast as she could, Sameen bumped her shoulder on the doorframe as she ran down the hallway. She dashed down the stairs, ignoring Root calling after her and hurried down the stairs as fast as she could, almost tripping over her heels. Bursting through the front door, she cursed the hot Texas air and started down the street. She need to hurt something; she'd decide what in the car.

00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

Root pushed the gas pedal down and winced as the wind whipped her dress against her legs. Her headlights barely cut through the heavy darkness of the open road. She'd already driven to the hill, but Sameen hadn't been there. Now, she was heading to the train, hoping to find her there.

Quickly reaching up to wipe tears away, Root let out a shaky breath. She hadn't known that Sameen was going to walk in on her and Hanna or that Hanna was going to kiss her. Two years ago, she would have been over the moon at Hanna initiating something like that, but now she was just worried she'd ruined everything with Sameen.

The past five months had been the worst of Root's her life. She'd lost her mother and her hearing in the same ten minutes. When she'd woken up in the hospital, she'd lost Sameen as well. Root clenched her jaw as she drove off the paved road and the bumpy, gravel road jostled her Vespa.

She'd felt so angry, so betrayed, at the time that she'd yelled at Sameen. For months, she'd been yelling at Sameen and she was tired. God, Root she was exhausted and all she wanted was to curl against Sameen and not wake up until they were adults and out of this stupid town.

Her head lights splashed against Sameen's car and she hit the brake, letting Ruthie drop to the ground. She ripped her helmet off. A gunshot rung out and the helmet slipped from her hands. The gravel crunched under Root's boots as she took off towards their clubhouse.

Did Sameen have a gun? What was she doing? Root's hands shook with nerves as she raced down the track towards the light spilling from the open car. She could make out Sameen's silhouette and cried out in relief.

Rootstumbled to a halt a few feet from Sameen, panting. Sameen didn't look at her; instead, she raised her gun and fired another shot, blasting away a can she'd set on the tracks. Root swallowed hard, her heart racing, and waited for Sameen to face her. Sameen stayed put, glaring down the sights of the gun.

"Sameen," Root started, her whole body shaking, "I'm so sorry. I didn't know Hanna was going to kiss me. I didn't want her to. I don't want her to. I, um…"

Sameen shot another can and clicked her shot gun open, draping the barrel over her arm and reaching into a bag at her feet for more bullets. Root took a moment to look her over; Sameen was wearing the shirt she'd gotten her for Christmas. Root's eyes burned from crying and she wiped her face, trying to put together an organized thought.

"I'm sorry for being an asshole the past few months," Root started as Sameen clicked her gun shut, still ignoring her. "I was really hurt and really lost and I was just… so angry. At… At you and at my mom and at doctor who couldn't fix my ear. I just needed time to be angry, but you were so nice to me. You were so supportive and I couldn't hate you, even though I wanted to."

She took a deep breath as Sameen hit another can, the shot loud in her ear. Reaching up, she rubbed her tattoo, still a little raw and rough under her fingertips.

"I don't like Hanna," Root sighed, rubbing her face. "Not even a little bit. That's why it was so easy to hang out with her. She's not…important to me anymore. I just…" she growled with frustration, taking a step forward. "There was no risk with her. She didn't know about my mom or about you and she just wanted to do fun stuff and not talk about anything important, but I was thinking about you the whole time!

"I was thinking about how great our trip had been and how much I missed hanging out with you, but then I'd see you…" Root trailed off. Sameen lowered her gun, but didn't turn around. "I'd see you and I'd remember that you called the police and even though I know you had to, I'm glad you did, but even though I knew that…I felt weak. I felt like I had no control, but I could control us. I could control me."

Sameen finally turned to face her, the light from the train making the tears on her face shine. She looked small, Root thought. She looked worn out. Root's shivering intensified and she wondered if Sameen remembered when Root came out to her. They'd stood just like this in front of Sameen's house; Root had been shaking then, too. Sameen had hugged her, brought her inside, and they had fallen asleep tangled in each other's arms.

Root swallowed, feeling unsteady and unsure what to say. "I went upstairs with Hanna because the party was really loud. I'm still getting used to the one ear thing and my head started to hurt. We sat on the bed in Martine's stupidly pink room and the countdown started. Ten seconds later, she kissed me out of nowhere and you saw. I didn't want her to be my first kiss on the year. I wanted to make up with you."

Sameen's hands clenched around the barrel of the gun, her knuckles white against the metal. Her face was blank, but her tears gave her away.

"I hate this," she said softly. "I've never felt like this before. I hope that I never feel like this again. Do you walk around like this? Like your insides are screaming? All the time? I thought love was supposed to steady you and make you strong, but I feel so weak. I don't want this. This isn't my thing."

Root's eyes fluttered. "You love me?"

"Of course I love you!" Sameen scoffed. "I don't make connections, Root. I don't get attached or, or care about anything, but here I am! Crying like an idiot. God, you don't even know, do you?" she shook her head, a ghost of a smile on her lips. "The first day of school, you walked into the locker room wearing that dumb jean jacket and I… I don't know, but you looked at me all skinny legs and blonde hair and I didn't know what to do."

"What?" Root shook her head. "You liked me?"

"You crawled into my window and I let you stay," Sameen laughed, her voice raspy. "Imagine anyone else doing that. I would have killed them. You just… kept bugging me."

Root slowly closed the distance between them, reaching out to lay her hands on the shotgun. Sameen let her pull it away and Root dropped it onto the ground.

"I'm sorry," Root breathed, running her thumbs across Sameen's cheeks and wiping her tears away. "I'm sorry for hurting you, but, hey, one long nap and you'll be back to normal. I'm the loser who feels all the time."

Sameen laughed and bunched her hands in Root's shirt, stepping towards her. Their bodies brushed together and Root wrapped her arms around Sameen's shoulders. She'd missed this closeness. Two months of sleeping in tiny beds pushed against each other and then nothing until now had been terrible.

"I love you, Sameen," Root whispered. "Always have, always will."

Sameen sighed loudly and pressed her face into Root's shoulder. "Will we ever go a full year without some kind of fight or drama?"

"Hmm, maybe someday."

"I won't hold my breath," Sameen chuckled, pulling away.

Root grinned as Sameen took her hand and led her up the stairs into the train. They walked across the rug and sat on the bed. For a moment, they sat in silence and Root wasn't sure what to do. Was she allowed to touch Sameen? Could she change into pajamas or would taking her clothes off be weird? A mosquito landed on her leg and she reached down to wave it away.

Sameen pulled her leg to her chest and took her shoes off, throwing them onto the rug. Root did the same. Sameen stood to undress, unbuttoning her pants and sliding them down her legs. A long scratch ran from her hip to mid-thigh and Root reached out to touch it.

Sameen's hand wrapped around hers and pulled Root to her feet. Outside the train, the Cicadas hummed insistently. Sameen's face was closed off, Root couldn't tell what she has thinking, but Sameen's strong hands turned Root around and slowly pulled the zipper on her dress down.

"Sameen?" Root asked, pulling her dress down her arms and turning back to face Sameen. "What now?"

Her dress dropped to the floor and Root couldn't hear the noise it made, but she heard the blood rushing in her ears as Sameen pulled her close, their bare skin sticking together with sweat. Sameen's fingers tangled in Root's hair, yanking her face down.

Sameen's mouth was hot and hard against Root's and her teeth clamped around Root's lip, making her cry out in pain. Root pulled away and dropped to the bed, scooting backwards until her shoulders hit the back wall. Sameen ripped her crop top over her head and crawled across the bed to her.

She put her legs on either side of Root's hips and dipped her head to kiss her again. Root closed her eyes, body burning. The lace of Sameen's bra was rough under her palms and Root sighed happily. Sameen moved her mouth to kiss Root's jaw, lips trailing down along her neck, biting softly.

Root was panting, out of breath from their kiss and the closeness of Sameen. Her hands trailed over Sameen's firm stomach and Sameen dropped her head onto Root's shoulder.

"I don't want to do anything tonight," Sameen mumbled. "I'm tired and I'm still angry at you."

"Ok," Root nodded, shifting her arms to wrap around Sameen's stomach. "We don't have to do anything. We never have to do it again, if you want."

Sameen pulled away frowning. "Don't be dramatic, weirdo."

"I'm just saying take all the time you need!"

"Whatever," Sameen rolled her eyes. She dropped onto her side, legs tangled in Root. "Get the blankets; you're shaking like a leaf."

Root pulled a sheet over them, knowing her shivers weren't from the cold. She had Sameen back, at least a little bit, and she was overwhelmed with relief.

"Come here," Sameen demanded, scooting towards Root. "I'll warm you up."

"Oh, Sameen," Root tilted her head, "You light a fire in my heart."

"Disgusting." Sameen mimed throwing up even as she tucked herself into Root's arms. "So gross. Go to sleep."

Root smiled and closed her eyes. For the first time since she'd been back in Bishop, she relaxed. She let Sameen's breath against her collarbone lull her to sleep.

00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

Root pulled the tattoo gun away and looked down at her work. As a birthday present, she'd given Sameen a tattoo, the same mute button icon as behind her own ear except over Sameen's heart instead. She was glad the tattoo was small; the treehouse's wooden floors were hard on her knees.

The past couple weeks had been nice. She and Sameen were still tip-toeing around each other, but they were friends again. They were girlfriends again. Root grinned and stood up, putting the gun down on her dresser.

"Alright, it's done," she said.

Sameen climbed out of the small bed and crossed the treehouse to look in the mirror. Root pulled her shorts on, keeping an eye out for Sameen's reaction. Another good thing about making up was getting to have sex again; it was lucky that only she and Sameen had keys to the treehouse.

"It looks great, Root," Sameen said, turning back to her. "I like it."

"Good," Root grinned. "It's permanent."

Sameen rolled her eyes and walked back to the bed. "Where did you learn to do tattoos anyway?"

Root shrugged, adjusting her shirt. "I practiced on some oranges and then just did it. It's not that hard, really."

"It's pretty loud, though," Sameen said, pulling her shirt over her head.

"Well, it's a good thing I'm deaf in that ear, huh?"

"Whoops."

"It's alright," Root laughed. "We can talk about it without it being weird. I think we're there."

"Good," Sameen, sighed relieved. She adjusted the waistband of her shorts and sat on the bed. "What now?"

Root sat next to her, looking her over. Sameen had trimmed her hair recently; it hung to the middle of her back, long and thick and dark. Root reached out to twist a strand.

"Can I braid your hair? Like I used to?"

"Sure." Sameen shifted so her back was to Root. "Go for it."

Root picked up a brush from the floor and started brushing out Sameen's ends. Her hair was always so soft, and she smelled like sweat and fabric softener. Root rose onto her knees to see the top of Sameen's head.

"What are going to do for Valentine's day?" Sameen asked. "It's our one year anniversary."

"Is it really, though? We were broken up for like five months." Root ran a final stroke through Sameen's hair and dropped the brush. She started pulling strands of hair into her hands. "Does it could as one year? Or seven months?"

"I never accepted the break-up, so it's one year."

Root's heart warmed and she smiled. Sameen hadn't let Root break them up and Root would be forever grateful for that. Sameen believed in them and Root loved her for it.

"Ok, one year, then. I don't know what we should do."

Sameen scratched her nose. "I'd say we could go back to the symphony, but I don't think you'd enjoy it as much."

"Probably not," Root agreed. "That would have been nice, though. We could have made it our thing."

"My parents used to go to the same restaurant for their anniversary ever year," Sameen said softly. "It was in New York; I can't remember the name. They'd leave me with a babysitter and get all dressed up and go out to eat. Every year. Maybe we could find something like that?"

Root tied off the end of the braid and leaned forward, hugging Sameen from behind. "I'd like that. We should start when we've graduated, though. I don't plan on staying in the area."

"True." Sameen patted Root's arms and stood up. "Want to go on the roof and look at the stars?"

"Yes!" Root followed her up the steps to the second level and to the window. "I don't think I've looked up once all winter."

Sameen looked at her, eyes tight. "We'll make up for it."

She turned and climbed out the window, hoisting herself up with ease. Root swung a leg out onto a tree branch, feeling around in the dark, and carefully reached up the hold onto the roof. Sameen's hands wrapped around her arms and helped pull her up.

"Thanks," Root breathed as she sat down, "I haven't been working out."

"Yeah, I figured," Sameen chuckled, sitting next to her. "We'll get you back into it. You can join me and the boys."

Root nodded and looked up at the stars, trying to find Orion. He was to the west, already starting to set for the winter. She wrapped her arms around her knees and thought about the future.

Hopefully, Mr. Ingram would let her join Science Bowl late. She was smarter than all the other kids on the team, but she'd be happy to join even as an alternate. It would be nice to get back to normal. She needed to talk to Mrs. Reese and apologize for abusing her hospitality; Mrs. Reese was always so kind to her and she'd just done whatever she wanted.

Would Mrs. Reese adopt her? Probably not. Even if she wasn't dating Sameen, Root was 17 now. She would probably have to get emancipated unless someone in Bishop decided to adopt her, and that was doubtful.

"Hey." Sameen's voice pulled her back into the present. "You ok?"

Root nodded. "Yeah, just thinking."

"No shit. I could hear your brain working from here."

Laughing, Root punched Sameen in the arm. "You could only hear mine because yours is so quiet."

Sameen rolled her eyes. "Stars are falling, beaming down. On the ground, is where I'm found. On a summer's night, some stars may fall, but I am here to catch them all. Looking at the stars above, I can see some stars of love. Some are good. Some are kind. Some are yours. And some are mine. Oh! Stars above please shine your light so that I may find my way, tonight. Stephanie Mayle."

Root grinned at her. "I love when you recite poetry."

"I know," Sameen said, smug. "That's why I do it."

"Hey, Sameen?"

"Yeah?"

"I love you."

"I love you, too."