Disclaimer: I do not own the Kamisama Hajimemashita/Kamisama Kiss series or any of the characters who have been featured so far. I only own the scenarios featured in this fanfiction.

Chapter 27:Ink on canvas

A/N: Requested by SmileRen c:

Ew! Ew, ew, ew!

Why was there so much mud everywhere? It's going to stain my new shoes!

I sighed and traipsed through the sludge and made a mental note to moan at Kei.

It's all her fault.

If she hadn't of been late meeting me today because she'd overslept, I wouldn't have waited so long for her and ended up missing the bus. Now I had to endure the cold, the sleet and the squelchy soil just to get to school.

Just my luck.

'I think I should get a chinchilla, Tomoe, they're adorable!'

'Why get another pet, we already have Mizuki.'

'Nanami-chan!' I call out, waving madly.

'Huh? Ami!'

She ran over and hugged me. 'Why are you walking to school in this weather?'

'I missed the bus and Kei's going to be late. What about you?' I gazed at Tomoe. He didn't look the type to let his girlfriend stagger to school in a skirt in this weather, but here they were.

'We missed the bus too because Mizuki threw sake at Tomoe.'

Now that I think about it, he did look pretty murderous.

I know it was awful, but on the way to school accompanied by Nanami and Tomoe really made me so envious. Nanami chatted away as usual, waving her gloved hands around, playing with her woolly hat and tightening her scarf (no doubt Tomoe made her wear those) and laughed without a care in the world. Tomoe barely contributed to the conversation, only answering with sarcastic or subdued comments, but he watched her eagerly and never took his eyes off her.

I wanted a boyfriend like that so badly.

We entered the classroom and Nanami tossed all her winter clothing on the desk and sighed. Tomoe stroked her red cheeks and they whispered to each other.

Why couldn't someone do that with me?

The bell rang and Kei slammed the door open, breathing heavily, but she still managed to look pretty. How on earth does she do it?

'Where've you been?' I whispered to her as I handed her book to her and moved onto the next table, placing the book on the desk.

'With my new boyfriend. He's such a cutie. I finally decided to stop going for the hot jerks and go for the shy ones, y'know? They're so much nicer, and definitely won't break your heart,' she murmured in reply.

'Kei! Ami! See me at break!'

'Yes, Miss,' we mumbled gloomily in unison.

Nanami threw me a sympathetic look from across the room but quickly turned back to Tomoe and continued smiling. His eyes never deviated from hers.

I lowered my head and stared at my textbook.


'Hey, Kei, Ami…' Nanami mumbled, smiling weakly at me. 'How was it?'

'I watched her silently as Kei mimicked her moaning in a high pitched voice.

'Honestly, what a cow, right, Ami?' Kei asked. I didn't reply. I was too busy concentrating on not crying but my eyes still pricked with tears.

Nanami wrapped an arm round my shoulders and flicked her chocolate-y hair out of her face. 'Forget her, Ami, it's okay!' Her support continued until Tomoe insisted on them visiting the library to study English before she left with a final encouragement.

Kei shrugged and typed hyper-speed on her phone again. 'You coming to class, Ami?'

'Um…' I wiped my eyes, 'no, I don't feel very well. I'll just go to the bathroom. Will you tell the teacher why I'm late?'

'Sure, but you want me to come with you? You never go anywhere alone.'

'I'm fine.'


You never go anywhere alone.

'I'm fine,' I whispered.

I sat against the wall and allowed my tears to fall on my knees.

I'm fine.

I'm just tired. So, so tired.

Tired of hoping, tired of crying, tired of fighting, tired of lying, tired of dreaming, tired of losing, tired of fighting. Tired of being tired.

I wiped my eyes again and stared at my hands. The pale skin didn't quite conceal the delicate blue veins scattered carelessly beneath the surface.

I pulled a grip from my hair and snapped it in two. The curls dropped in front of my eyes and I pushed them back. I closed my eyes tightly and skated the sharp end of the grip over my skin, not hard enough to break it. Goosebumps raised on my arms and they tingled with pleasure.

The surface of white skin yielded like paper.

The blood that dripped slowly trickled and spread warmth over my body.

Ink on canvas.

I drew on my canvas a lot, whenever I was lonely, whenever I had no one to turn to, I depended on it.

When I ran out of room, I got a new canvas. The ink was always the same. My drawings improved over time, became more beautiful. I was the only one to admire them. No one else saw them.

Maybe they didn't want to.

Maybe they drew too.

A/N: So I'm sorry this one turned so miserable. I began to empathise with Ami a lot through this chapter. I think that it might give you a hint as to what goes on in my life and around me. I have felt like this, but I'm no exception, because a lot of people draw, and though I've never drawn, I do admire my own canvas.

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