Author's Note:
For all of those who are reading this, thank you for continuing to follow this story. I apologize for the lengthy time between updates - I could elaborate on how real life hijacked all writing endeavors, but I won't bore you with those details. Time though is valuable, so I am very grateful for the time you spend reading this tale. Thanks again!

Chapter 17

"You want what?"

"The Normandy, sir."

"What's going on, Shepard?"

"You want to know what occurred between the moment I stepped into the Citadel beam and the red wave erupted. You want to know what really happened during those three point two minutes of static."

"Yes, I do."

"So do I, and I need the Normandy to do it."

…

Three days after Lakota met with Admiral Anderson, she and Liara were walking arm in arm along the Days Bay Pier which was located on the western edge of Wellington Harbor. The midday sun shined brightly in the cloudless sky contributing to the unseasonable warmth of the early spring day and adding to the pair's upbeat mood. Even the light breeze carrying in the fresh salty scent from the sea and the constant chatter from the gulls as they swooped happily through the air seemed to be evidence that a shift was occurring. With the Reapers gone even Mother Nature was breathing easier.

As they continued to travel along the pedestrian path, Lakota wrapped her right arm around the Asari's shoulders, pulling their bodies together but never loosing stride. Since their night of pancakes and confessions, she couldn't get enough of Liara, could not be physically close enough to her through the course of the day. Even when attending to the most trivial tasks, they found they were doing them in close proximity, taking every opportunity to touch, to cuddle, to be together in every way possible. The threat of her dying still lingered, she supposed, and suspected it would for a while. And while things seemed relatively calm, until they solved the mystery of the voice in her dreams, there would continue to be a nameless peril in the back of both of their minds.

For the moment though, the only thought the pair focused on was their destination and the fact that they were heading there together.

Liara snaked her left arm around her lover's waist allowing for their bodies to merge even closer, taking the opportunity to steal a covert glance of the uniformed woman. Since their early days on the Normandy, she had always felt that the Alliance uniform was a good look for the human. Confident. Sexy. Composed. It was in the surprisingly flattering way the navy blue pants outlined the shape of her hips and well-toned thighs which not only emphasized her femininity but the strength beneath the fabric as well. Even the uniform top's crisp, clean lines hinted at an athletic frame, allowing her imagination to fill in the blanks as to what lay hidden beneath. To her secret delight, the mere sight of the commander in her uniform made her mouth water as unbidden sensual images taken from intimate memory spiraled through her thoughts.

Catching the Asari's appraising look in her periphery, Lakota smiled, a wolfish gleam shining in her eyes. "See something you like, Doctor?"

Liara laughed and leaned in closer so she could kiss her cheek. "More like something I cannot do without, Commander."

Their need to be in constant physical contact would wear off, eventually. They were both cognizant of that. But in the meantime, they fully indulged their need for each other, glad that they were on leave and their current endeavor would not force them apart.

They walked in comfortable silence for a few minutes, then Liara sighed heavily which was a sign she was ruminating on some abstract idea.

"What's on your mind?" Lakota tightened her hold on the Asari's shoulders to gently encourage her disclosure.

"I am still surprised that Admiral… I mean Councilor Anderson agreed to let you take the Normandy."

"Honestly, so am I."

"You are?"

"Yes. The Alliance has been keeping a close eye on me. To the point that it actually feels like someone is breathing down my neck. But now, suddenly, they are going to let me fly off with their most advanced ship…"

"Anderson trusts you."

"Yes, he does. And so does Hackett, which goes a long way, but it's still unusual. Regardless of their reasoning though, they gave the Normandy back to me and I'm not going to ask why."

Liara hesitated a moment, then asked, "What about EDI?"

"The Normandy and EDI are one and the same."

"Yes," Liara said, knowing the Spectre was avoiding the uncomfortable question. "Do you plan on talking with her?"

"I don't see how I can avoid it."

…

"I have to ask, Shepard, do you remember what happened?"

"Some of it, Sir, but it still seems a bit abstract to me. Like I'm seeing puzzle fragments and can't quite make out the big picture until all of the pieces are laid out in front of me. It's frustrating."

"Hackett's going to ask if you know where you're heading."

"At this point, I'd like to refrain from saying."

"This is highly unusual, Shepard."

"I know. And I know I can't give you any guarantees, but I swear this is my best option to find out the truth."

"Your best option?"

"Our best option."

…

"I don't know what to say," Lakota said, her bewildered expression revealing a lot all on its own.

She and Liara stood in an Alliance hanger, the destination they were headed towards on their walk, and were looking at an unexpected sight. Members from the Spectre's squad, past and present, stood in front of the Normandy's shuttle smiling mischievously at the stunned human.

Garrus was the first to reply. "Shepard speechless? That's a first."

"What the hell, Shepard," Jack snarled, "you think I'm going to let you go off and kick ass without me a second time?" Although her tone was gruff, the tattooed biotic was smirking.

"If the Citadel Council was here, I'm sure you'd think of something to say, Commander," Joker quipped. "Either that or cut their transmission mid-sentence."

Grunt leaned back on the shuttle, crossing his arms in front of his chest. "Shepard doesn't need words. She has her fists."

"What is this?" the Spectre asked, both hands making a sweeping motion in front of her. "What are all of you doing here?"

Miranda smiled knowingly. "We're all going with you, Shepard."

"Well, not just us," Tali said. "Traynor, Vega, Alenko and Chakwas are already on the Normandy finishing up the final prep. EDI, too, but I think that goes without saying."

The former Cerberus officer nodded her head. "There's not much left to do. Unless something catastrophic happens, we should be ready for tomorrow morning's departure."

Lakota stared at the group in disbelief. "I… I don't know what to say."

"'Nice to see you' works well," Garrus said sardonically.

"You're an ass, Vakarian."

"That works, too."

Lakota seemed about to say something else, hesitated, and then shook her head fretfully, as if trying to shake off an ache. Along with those who had spoken there were three others in the group: Cortez, Javik and even Samara.

Liara captured her lover's hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze. "Zaeed couldn't make it, but he sent a flamethrower as a get well gift."

The Spectre turned to face the researcher. "Wait. You knew?"

"Of course. Who do you think sent the message to everyone?"

Cortez stepped forward and addressed the group. "It's time to head to the Normandy."

While everyone filed into the shuttle, Lakota walked over to Javik, looking slightly uncomfortable as she stood in front of him, her right hand rubbing the back of her neck. They hadn't spoken since the incident at the firing range. She cleared her throat, then raised her gaze to meet his. "Listen… about the other day…" The sound of her voice tapered off as though dropping into an abyss.

Seconds ticked by as the Prothean analyzed the human, his eyes narrowing in the process. Then suddenly he took a deep breath, straightened his posture and nodded his head once. "I understand, Commander."

The Spectre exhaled an audible sigh of relief before responding with her own curt nod. "Okay. Good."

Tali, who had witnessed the brief exchange, stepped toward the pair. "Wait. That's it?"

Lakota and Javik looked at the Quarian, a rather perplexed expression on each of their faces.

Tali pointed her right hand at Lakota. "But you were…" Then she pointed her left hand at Javik. "And he flew…" And then she shook both of her hands in the air. "How could you both just…," she stuttered sounding both confused and exasperated.

Lakota glanced at Javik, then back at Tali before shrugging her shoulder noncommittally.

"Keelah, Shepard," the Quarian grumbled, "sometimes you are such a guy."

…

Later that evening, the crew members gathered together in the Normandy's starboard observation lounge. Most hadn't seen each other since returning to Earth, some hadn't been seen since the party Shepard hosted on the Citadel which now seemed like a lifetime ago. It was an informal gathering, one in which the participants toasted to those who were no longer with them and to those who still were but who were absent. Garrus, Grunt, Vega and Jack tried to outdo each other by telling grand tales of their individual exploits most of which were highly speculative while Joker, Cortez and Tali listened in, playfully pointing out when the stories became too grandiose. As the night wore on, the frequency of their skeptical interruptions occurred at a rate that was directly proportional to the alcohol which had been consumed.

Kaidan and Traynor were the impromptu bartenders for the festivities, trading secret recipes while making sure no one had an empty glass. After grumbling about their lack of vision, Javik contributed his own recipes, making sure to preface each uniquely disturbing list of ingredients with the phrase "in my cycle." While he amused himself with reciting the strange and unusual tastes of Protheans, Dr. Chakwas walked around the room with a bottle of Serrice Ice Brandy in hand sharing the delicate amber liquid with anyone who was interested. With each glass that was filled, a toast was made, bringing the threat of tears to the sentimental doctor's eyes on more than one occasion. Samara, for her part, mingled amongst the crew, but was more often than not content to stare out the observation window, losing herself and her thoughts within the starry oblivion of space.

With all the nostalgic reminiscing and easy fellowship, there was one person whose absence was noticed but never mentioned. The common denominator who had brought them all together initially.

Miranda took a sip from her glass of wine. "Where is Shepard?"

"She said she had a few things to do," Liara replied. The Spectre had mentioned that she would be late, but didn't mention what would be keeping her. "She'll be showing up later."

"Don't you find it a little odd that our resident Justicar is here on the Normandy instead of on Lesuss with her daughter?"

Liara's gaze drifted across the room to the other Asari as she contemplated Miranda's words. Maybe it was because of the venerated status the Justicars carry in Asari society or the respect and awe ingrained as a child growing up on Thessia, but she too questioned Samara's presence on the Normandy. Somehow it seemed wrong that she wasn't dispensing justice and bringing order to Asari space when so much of it was still entrenched in chaos. She knew that wasn't a necessarily fair assessment. During the war, Samara had fought just as hard as the rest of those in the room and she too deserved a respite. But when you're part of an ancient order whose actions are renowned bordering on legendary, and whose reputation is above reproach, then normal rules don't apply.

While she had never traveled with Samara as Miranda and some of the others had, she had to admit that the older Asari was a fascinating individual, an enigma of sorts, who had a commanding diametric presence. The Justicar exuded a demeanor of regal beauty and grace yet was also wrapped in a cloak of devastating lethality. Much like a Spectre she knew. Frowning, Liara said, "She and Shepard are good friends. I don't find it odd that she wants to help."

"I suppose, but this is hardly a suicide mission."

"With Shepard, nothing is guaranteed," Liara said dryly, sparking a small laugh from Miranda. "Besides, everyone here has other obligations calling to them, but they have all voluntarily chosen to make Shepard's quest a priority."

As her eyes scanned the room, the researcher smiled inwardly, grateful for the unconditional and unsolicited support offered by every individual in the room. "The Turian government is in constant contact with Garrus, asking him to return to Palaven. Tali is managing her Admiralty duties with the Migrant Fleet remotely. The Alliance crew ended their furloughs, leaving Earth along with their friends and family, to come on this expedition. Grunt is here instead of helping with the rebuilding efforts on Tuchanka."

"Even Jack made it," Miranda said, nodding in the direction of the tattooed biotic.

"Her students are safe at the Alliance base in Barcelona and she is technically on leave." Liara wasn't sure why she continued to list the responsibilities others in the room shouldered, but as she glanced back over at the Justicar she had a suspicion that by doing so eased her own concerns regarding the Justicar's motivations for being on the Normandy.

"She did say Shepard always found the bigger fights."

Liara looked thoughtfully at the dark burgundy liquid in her glass, an Asari wine that dated back to a time before her birth and one of Lakota's favorites. Then she raised the glass to her lips and took a shallow sip, letting the smooth flavorful liquid swirl around her tongue. She didn't say anything until she had swallowed the potent drink. "Let's hope this is not one of those times."

Smiling, Miranda commented, "I noticed you didn't mention my other obligations."

"You've already secured Oriana's safety. She's always been your first priority."

Miranda's head whipped around to stare in befuddlement at the researcher. She had been extremely meticulous and covert while procuring an undisclosed safe haven for her sister and her sister's adoptive family, to the point of zealousness. "How did…" she began, but then her voice tapered off. "Never mind. Shepard warned me about you."

Liara smiled at the comment. She knew she had an innate ability for gathering ambiguous information—that was part of the reason she was such a good archeologist—but to hear the astonishment in the former Cerberus Officer's tone inflated her ego a bit. Miranda was a tough one to impress.

Raising her empty glass, Miranda said, "Time for a refill. Can I get you anything?"

"No. Thank you though."

As the former Cerberus officer stepped away, Liara scanned the room and noticed that Samara was heading in her direction.

"Dr. T'Soni."

Titling her head slightly, Liara replied with a formal greeting to the older Asari. "Justicar Samara."

The hint of a smile curled at the corner of the matriarch's lips. "You've been staring at me for quite some time, Doctor. Is there something on your mind?"

Liara hoped that her scrutiny had gone unnoticed. Knowing that it hadn't, that her appraisal had been observed, caused her stomach to clench as though it had been tied into knots. "I meant no disrespect. I was just… surprised that you chose to join us."

"I go where I am needed," Samara replied succinctly. "I feel I am most needed here."

"Of course." The researcher tried to temper her uneasiness by straightening her shoulders, then taking a small sip from her glass of wine. An entire childhood of reverence was a difficult reaction to maneuver through. "Miranda inquired about your presence, as well. I believe she was curious why you were not heading to Lesuss to be with your daughter."

A shadow passed over the Justicar's eyes making their deep blue hues seem infinitely darker, as though mirroring an endless abyss. "When you live by a code that compels you to harsh action, you learn the dangers of curiosity. It is a pity that not all can say the same."

As her gaze fell to the floor, Liara felt an unnatural heat slowly roll across her cheeks and she knew, without a doubt, that a purplish hue adorned her skin in its passing. From a young age, her mother had taught her to honor and respect the Justicar Order, and she doubted Benezia would be particularly pleased with her now. But the matriarch also taught her about the sacrifices those in the Order made and the Code they committed themselves to. Liara hesitated briefly, debating on whether or not to broach the subject that had been plaguing her mind for months. Then, even though potentially dangerous, she finally gave into her curiosity. "May I ask you a personal question?"

"You may."

Liara twirled the wine glass nervously in her but did not take a drink. "Shepard told me about you taking the Third Oath of Subsumation."

"It was necessary."

"Yes. I understand. But she never mentioned you ending the oath."

Eyes narrowing slightly, the Justicar replied, "I have yet to hear a question."

"Why?"

Samara stared back at Liara. Regal. Unmoving.

Clearing her throat, Liara rephrased her question. "Why did you not end your oath?"

"It was not warranted." The Justicar's expression remained inscrutable.

"Then the Code doesn't forbid such an extended… "

"The Code is strict," Samara interrupted, preempting Liara's question. "It is five thousand sutras and covers every situation one can encounter. I have memorized every word. There is only the Code. It does not exist to bring about spiritual enlightenment. Its purpose is to punish the wicked and protect the innocent."

"But you and Shepard parted ways. Why maintain the oath to her?"

"The Justicars were formed to bring order to a world that laughs at the notion," Samara stated impassively. "The role is solitary. Its demands are lonely and uncompromising often to the point of pain, but following the Code left me with no regrets. During my time with Shepard, I discovered that the demands on a Spectre were very similar."

Liara remained silent, sensing that the Justicar had more to say.

"Like Shepard, I know what it means to leave everything behind and fight." Although it could have been her imagination, Liara thought the blue of Samara's eyes softened. "And the truth that sometimes the most brutal path is the only honest one. While it is true that my Oath to Shepard binds me to follow her commands, it is also true that her choices could have just as easily have been my own. Our methods may be different, but out goals are not."

"I see."

"Do you?" The Justicar stared at the researcher, her eyes almost piercing in their intensity.

"I believe so, yes."

"Then know this as well. The Code is black and white, there is no grey. While Shepard and I may share similar goals, some she has aligned with do not. The actions of those who work within the shadows inevitably dance along the lines of impropriety, bringing my attention to bear. But as long as they follow her, then her allegiance to them becomes my allegiance. My oath to Shepard protects them, as well."

Suddenly, Liara's mouth felt dry as a desert. "I see," she choked.

"Yes, I think you finally do." A slight smile graced the Justicar's lips. "Time is precious, Dr. T'Soni. Spend it wisely and with those who care for you."

"Thank you, I will."

Liara's gaze followed Samara as she returned to the observation window. Taking a plentiful drink of wine, she desperately wondered what was keeping Shepard.

…

Three days earlier, just after Lakota ended her conversation with Anderson:

"Admiral."

"Councilor."

"I could have gone the rest of my life never hearing that and died a happy man."

"Shepard needed the Normandy?"

"She wouldn't say why, but she is onto something."

"Shepard will get it done… no matter what the cost. But still, we have to be prepared in case this thing goes sideways on us."

"I trust Shepard."

"So do I, but that's not the issue."

"We have contingencies in place."

"And Shepard?"

"Is unaware."