Four
After recovering from her meeting with Malfoy, Hermione spent a few days researching polyamory relationships, three-way relationships, alternative relationships, and everything in between. Every free moment she had, she spent inside a book, instructing herself to see if this was truly what she wanted.
By the end of each day, she was even more eager now than at the beginning. It wasn't going to be an easy road, but she definitely wanted to see where it took her.
That is, if the other two were willing.
Hermione knew what the next step was. And it was one she had been dreading for months. Before even considering making this proposition, she needed to know how Harry felt about her.
She already knew he liked Malfoy. And she knew Malfoy liked her, and Harry. But this was the hardest one for her. How could she ever talk to Harry about this?
That Friday, she made sure he had no other plans and made him dinner.
"Chicken pot pie," she told him. "It's in the oven. There's also ice cream and biscuits."
"Nice. What's the occasion?" he asked, choosing a movie from her collection.
"Nothing special," she lied. "So, how is everything?"
He shrugged, walking over to the table where she was sitting. "The same. You?"
"Yes, same…" she trailed off, the knot in her stomach getting bigger from the anticipation.
He stood behind her. "You look tense. Too much reading, I suppose." He started massaging her neck and shoulders, slow and purposeful. Hermione closed her eyes and tried not to moan at the feeling of his big hands on her. It's not like she hadn't felt them before but, after so many days dreaming and fantasizing, she was definitely too sexually charged for this to be just a normal, friendly massage.
"I suppose," she repeated, unconsciously leaning into him.
They were quiet as he continued to massage her, making her forget about her previous nervousness.
The oven timer dinged suddenly and she jumped out of her trance.
"That's the food," she exclaimed and went up to get it.
Harry sat at the table as she served them both and she realized she needed to start talking if she wanted to finish before midnight.
"Harry..." She spooned some sauce on his plate. "I wanted to talk to you about something. And it's kind of big."
He looked at her curiously. "Is everything alright?"
"Yes, I think." She sat down and looked at her food, suddenly not too hungry. Harry was already starting to eat.
"This is weird and maybe complicated but, I want you to keep in mind that no matter what you think of this, we're always going to be alright. Always."
He put down his fork. "You're scaring me. What's wrong?"
"No, nothing. I don't want you to worry, okay? Just promise me that you'll tell me the truth no matter what and know that I will always be here for you, unconditionally." She looked into his eyes, knowing that he was no less worried just because she said so.
"Of course." He nodded, pushing up his glasses. "Just like you'll always have me."
"Right. Okay. Listen, maybe is best if you let me talk first and then I'll hear whatever you have to say. Good or bad." She tried to smile reassuringly and he nodded.
Their food was going to get cold. She should have done this after. She breathed in and out and looked down at her hands.
"You are my best friend and I've always looked at you like that, and when you left for a year I was miserable. I missed you so much, and then when you came back it was like something had shifted for me and I started to realize that maybe I wasn't just seeing you as my friend anymore. I know it sounds crazy but it has come to the point where I can't keep ignoring it, and I was really dreading this because I don't want the best friendship that I have ever had to get ruined because of this." She hadn't realized a few tears had gathered in her eyes, because thinking about losing him was too much. She could feel his eyes on her as she took another deep breath.
"I don't want to lose you, Harry," she continued. "That's why I needed to say this, so I can finally work it out. You don't have to say anything, I know how big this is, believe me, I needed time to process it as well. But after you think about it, I want… no, I need you to be completely honest and do not spare me from anything just because it's me. I can take anything, you know that. So, please, please, please, just be honest and I promise everything will be normal again, I would never want to do anything to hurt us, because first you're Harry, my best friend, and that's what matters the most."
Hermione looked up, finally. Harry wasn't looking at her, he seemed to be lost in space, and she was beginning to regret this conversation.
She gave him a while, knowing how surprising this must be for him. The only sound was Crookshanks eating in the corner.
"So..." he started after what felt like hours "What does this mean? Do you like me?"
"Basically," she confirmed. He looked neutral, impossible to read.
"And, do you want to date me?"
Her mouth was ready to answer, to shout 'Yes!' a million times, but it was more complicated than that. "Well, that's the other thing. I just needed to know how you felt about this, because I know you like Malfoy and well-"
He interrupted her, "But I told you, it's just a crush, it doesn't mean-"
Now she interrupted him, "It's okay, Harry, I like him too."
His eyes widened. She covered her face with her hands for a second and then exhaled, feeling the weight leave her shoulders and settle on her stomach instead.
"What? You, you like him too?" he asked, completely taken aback.
She nodded, not sure what to expect now.
Harry stood up and started pacing. "What?" he thrw his hands up in the air. "I don't understand, what are you doing to me? How can you like Malfoy?"
"That's what's so hard to believe? Harry I just told you that I like you as well!" she exclaimed, not following him.
"I know, but Malfoy? You and Malfoy? Where is this coming from?"
"The same as you! He was flirting with me and we talk at work and eventually I started liking him. I'm sorry I didn't tell you before but you did the same thing, remember?"
He sighed. "This is too much. What are you trying to tell me? That you like both, Malfoy and me?"
"Yes. I like you both. But this was about you, first. I need to know what you think because this is a big deal, isn't it?"
He sat down in the sofa and she followed him, sitting on the coffee table to be in front of him.
"I don't know. I feel like I don't know anything." He threw his head back and she just wanted to comfort him.
"That's okay. You don't need to know now. But eventually, you might have something to say about it. I'm sorry to put you in this situation, Harry." For a while she genuinely wished she didn't have these feelings, if only because she knew it wouldn't be easy for him.
He exhaled softly. "It's okay. I just... I just remember when we were younger. You and Ron were always right there at the edge of something and…" he trailed off and then shook his head. "Well, I'd be lying if I said I never thought about it. You and me."
She smiled a bit. "You've thought about it?"
"Of course. We've spent so much time together it was impossible not to. I think I remember feeling something for you at Hogwarts, one year or another. But I always thought you and Ron were going to be together eventually, and then there was Cho, and then there was Ginny, and then Voldemort."
She choked on a laugh. "Sorry. You make it sound like he was an ex-boyfriend."
"Shut up." He laughed too and shook his head. Hermione wanted to hug him, but realistically she knew he needed his space.
"There was never time to seriously consider you," he said, his tone back to serious.
He wasn't looking at her and she tried to find his eyes. "I understand. But now is different. Now…"
He looked up at her, green eyes calm and comforting. "Now there is time."
She felt a spark of hope lighting up until he started to look confused again.
"But you like Malfoy," he remembered.
"And you do, too," She replied.
"I guess?" He looked at her expectantly, waiting to be filled in.
She took a moment to try to think how to bring her idea up.
Breaking the silence, Hermione decided to pose a question to see how open he'd be to her idea. "Harry, how open minded are you?"
He frowned. "What do you mean?"
"Well, you'd be willing to date women. And you'd be willing to date men." She was trying to be subtle but he wasn't getting it.
"Yes, that's what bisexual means," he stated, even more confused.
"What about both?" she inquired.
He looked at her as if she was speaking in a different language.
Clearly, she was going to have to spell it out for him.
"At the same time?" she added, anxiously fiddling with the hair-tie on her wrist.
His reaction was slow but expected. He frowned like it was the craziest thing he had ever heard in his life.
"I know how it sounds but listen to me," she urged, wanting to explain more before he freaked out.
"You, Malfoy, and me?" His voice was unnervingly calm, like he was truly doubting her sanity.
"It sounds insane to you because it's new but Harry, I have been thinking about this for a while now and I think, all things considered, is not so farfetched. We usually have preconceived notions about monogamy that makes us too judgmental to even imagine something else but actually-"
"Me, you, and Malfoy?" he repeated, interrupting her.
"Yes. Eventually. If it all works out. If you want. If he wants," she explained and Harry stood up abruptly.
"Malfoy, me, and you?" he asked, once again, shaking his head incredulously. "All together. At the same time. Dating." He was having an even more difficult time than she thought, trying to process this
"Yes," she repeated calmly, trying to be patient for his sake.
"I don't know if I can do this, Hermione. I can't believe this is serious, I'm just too..." he stopped talking, running his hands through his hair.
"I understand. I'm sorry. You don't have to say or do anything." This is pretty much what she was expecting, but it was still hard.
"Does he know? Malfoy. Have you talked to him?" He turned to her with big eyes.
"Well, no. I needed to ask you first because if you're not okay with something, anything, then it was pointless."
He and just stood there and she could almost hear his brain working.
"I have an idea. To see if this could work," she started, hoping Harry trusted her enough to continue listening to her crazy ideas. "We each go out on a date with one of the others, just two at the time. We see how we get along, you with him, me with him, and you with me. And then if it all goes well, we can try going out together the three of us. No pressure, just trying to think of it as an experiment."
"I don't know..." He looked worried again, the lines on his forehead clearly visible.
"That's fine. You can say no," she assured. The last thing she wanted was for him to feel like she was trying to convince him.
"I...I don't know," he repeated, looking anywhere but at her.
She stood up and walked up to him.
"I like you, Harry. I'm attracted to you. And I'm attracted to Malloy. You are too, right?"
He gave her a slow nod, unsure.
"Could you see yourself being attracted to me?"
"I think so. I don't know." He shook his head, frustrated.
"You take your time and think about it. I did. And Malfoy probably will." She petted his head tenderly with a small smile. "I'm sorry."
"Can I hug you?" he asked and she could already see him returning to his usual self.
"Of course. Always," she replied, opening up her arms for him.
They hugged for a full minute and it truly made her feel like everything would be alright.
"Do you want to finish eating? I'm sorry our food is cold," she said, trying to change the subject.
"We could put a warming charm on it," he reminded her and she couldn't help but chuckle and wonder why she didn't think about it before.
"If it's okay with you, I think I won't stay in tonight," he told her, braking apart and giving her a sorry look. Although she hadn't expected him to want to stay after everything, it still made her feel a bit rejected and she had to swallow hard.
Hermione gave him a small smile. "I get it. Don't feel bad, I'll be okay. Thank you. I hope you don't think it was wrong of me to tell you."
"No, no," He rushed sweetly, both hands on her shoulders. "It's definitely surprising but…you did what you had to do. Thank you for being honest."
He hugged her again and then they went back to the table, eating mostly in silence. Thankfully it was comfortable.
But deep inside she knew everything had changed, and only time would tell if it was for better, or for worse.
.
The weekend was quiet and solitary. Harry hadn't dropped by, but he wrote a couple of times saying he was alright and just needed time. She already missed him, but there was nothing she could do but wait.
On Monday she tried to advance on work as much as she could, because if everything went according to plan, it was going to be a busy week.
Around ten in the morning she wrote a memo.
Do you have plans for lunch?
H. Granger.
On the other side she wrote the location of delivery. Mr. Draco Malfoy, Head of Magical Cooperation, Tenth floor, Department of Muggle Relations.
She flicked her wand and the memo flew away to its destination. They weren't supposed to use them for personal matters but everybody always did.
She continued working and after ten minutes, a small piece of paper slipped under her door and landed on her desk.
Meet me at the pub in three hours.
Good. She had time to mentally prepare. She just hoped there wasn't anyone familiar eating there as well.
Three hours flew by and before she knew it she was knocking at the door of the pub. Then sign said it was closed.
Malfoy opened. "Hello, there."
"Hi. Thank you." She walked in, sighing in relief when she saw no one there.
"It's still closed, but the cook is already on duty. Thought this would be a bit more private." His smile was both mocking and charming and she didn't know how that was possible.
He led them to a table that was already set, even with wine. "I already ordered something, I hope that's alright," he said, sitting down.
"Yes, thank you." She cleared her throat. "So, how are you?"
"Excellent, thanks for asking. You?" He looked glowing and confident and compared to him she felt like a bundle of nerves.
"Good, good." She smiled and looked around, thinking about the best way to bring this up.
"You wanted to talk about something?" He supplied, probably sensing her inner struggle.
Quick and painless, then.
She nodded in agreement, wondering if she was being too obvious.
He poured them both some wine. "Does it have something to do with what we talked about last time?"
She bit her lip. "Yes. How did you know?"
He smiled arrogantly. "Just a hunch."
She almost couldn't believe she liked this idiot.
Hermione felt it was better to go straight to the point with him. He wasn't Harry. He was probably already half way there.
"What do you think about Harry?" she asked, trying to sound as confident as him.
He quirked one eyebrow. "This is about Potter, then?"
"Sort of. He thinks you've been flirting with him," she stated, taking a sip form her wine.
"Then he's not as clueless as I thought him to be." His grey eyes were serious, boring into her. And for some reason she had expected him to lie or avoid answering altogether.
Hermione started getting what talking to Malfoy was all about. You had to get on his level, you had to rise to the occasion, and most importantly, you had to be ready to win.
Thankfully, she loved winning. "So you fancy him?"
He looked like he was assessing how much to let on. "I wouldn't put it like that, but I suppose. You know, I'd really prefer if he was the one asking these questions. Why do you do this for him?"
She shook her head. "It's not for him... "
He tapped on his chin thoughtfully. "Continue."
"What do you think about me?" she asked, wondering how much she would have to say for him to get it.
Malfoy leaned back with a smile and contemplated her. "So, this is about you?"
"Sort of." She smirked. He really brought it out in her.
"I have been flirting with you," he skipped ahead.
Hermione wasn't going to let him have the upper hand. "I fancy you," she admitted without hesitations.
He seemed taken aback only for a split second. "I suppose I knew."
Although this was just a conversation, somehow it felt like a game, and she was going in for the kill.
"I also fancy Harry."
Malfoy didn't react. He held her eye contact for a long while and then blinked.
"We need food."
He rose from his seat and left for the kitchen.
Hermione wasn't completely certain, but she had a feeling she had won.
.
Lunch consisted of a simple but elegant burger, with blue cheese, caramelized onions and the most wonderful brioche bun she had ever tried.
She had never seen Malfoy eat anything with his hands before. Actually, she had barely really seen him eat before, except at Hogwarts. After a few bites, he drank half of his wine and looked at her again.
"So, just to be clear. What exactly are you proposing?"
"Trial dates. You go out once with each of us individually, and we do the same. After that, if it works, we try all together at the same time, and we go from there," she explained. Every time she thought about her plan, she liked it even more.
He mulled over her words. "This was your idea, wasn't it?"
"Yes."
"Progressive," he mused. "And hot." She almost snorted. "And how does Potter feel about it?"
She really tried not to grimace. "A bit overwhelmed, I believe. But he's thinking about it, so you have all the time you need to make your decision and-"
"Oh, no. I'm in," he cut her off and she cocked her head to the side.
"What? Don't you want to reflect on it a little? Take some time?" She honestly thought Malfoy couldn't surprise her anymore. She was wrong.
"What's there to reflect on? I get to go out with you, I get to go out with him, and then I get to decide if I want to go out with both of you at the same time. There's no downside the way I see it."
Hermione really admired his assurance and determination, aside from the fact that his eagerness to go out with them was igniting a turmoil inside her chest.
"Wow, okay. We still need to wait for Harry to decide and then we should probably meet to talk about it together, if he says yes." She said a bit doubtfully.
"He will," Malfoy assured her.
"You think so?" She asked doubtfully, her mind switching back to her previous worries about Harry.
He looked pretty certain even as he shrugged. "Obviously, I can't be sure. But from what I know of him, this is too big of an adventure for him to pass up."
She smiled, the thought of Malfoy knowing things about Harry making her feel better. "I hope you're right. But what if he says no?"
"I guess we'll cross that bridge when we get to it."
"That's a Muggle saying," she observed.
"A very good one. Eat some lunch, I'd hate to drop you off at your office half passed out," he said, pointing at her almost untouched food.
She rolled her eyes. "I don't pass out that easily."
"That's not what I heard." He pushed her plate further into her space. "So, I take it you've never been in a polyamory relationship before, right?"
"No. You?" She picked up her burger and took a bite.
"No. Have you been in a threesome?" he asked casually.
She tried not to choke as she was taken aback by his bluntness. "Err, no," she answered after swallowing.
"Someone had to say it, it's an important part that we'll have to deal with. I have been in one, once. But it was me and two women, so this would be different. I'll assume Potter's never had one and also, I'm assuming he's never been with a man before, correct?"
"Right." she sighed. "There's a lot to deal with."
"Quite a bit. And you? Are you okay, being with two men at the same time?" Malfoy seemed genuinely concerned about her answer and she appreciated it.
Hermione wasn't a Virgin, and sex was never taboo for her, but having sex with two men simultaneously was something she never thought she'd do. Still, she did her research, and she was pretty certain that she wanted to give it a go.
"I want to try, that's all I can say about it."
He smiled. "Knowing what you want it's all you need, really. Everything else, we can make it work."
They finished eating and Hermione needed to get back to work if she was going to get anything done today.
"Thanks for lunch, Malfoy, it was really good."
"Thank you for a lovely proposal. I hope I hear from you soon," he remarked as he walked her to the door.
"You will," she promised, feeling like the just settled a business meeting.
"I need to stay and take care of some things. See you later, Granger." He surprised her by leaning in and planting a soft kiss on her cheek.
"Goodbye," She called back weakly, resisting the urge to grab him and kiss him properly.
With one last smile the door closed she was left alone, with no other choice but to go back to work.
Author's notes: One again, thanks to divergentofhogwarts for the wonderful beta work and the many tips! 3