Chapter 5: Amanita

In which Amanita brings gifts

It's the middle of March when Wolfgang wakes up one afternoon to the sound of a knock at the door. He sits up, grabs the knife from under the mattress, steels himself.

There's another knock then, this time loud enough to rouse Felix, who glances over at Wolfgang.

"Hello?" calls a muffled voice. "I'm um— I'm a friend of Nomi's? Is anyone there?"

Lito, who they've learned can sleep through anything, doesn't move. They let him sleep.

Wolfgang replaces the knife under the mattress and, hesitantly, he and Felix make their way to the door of the church.

The knocking continues, as does the voice. "Wolfgang?" it says. "Felix? Hello?"

Felix unlocks the door and pulls it open to reveal a girl, with dark skin and dreadlocks highlighted by blue and purple braids, standing there with smile on her face and a large garbage bag gripped in one hand.

"Hello!" she says. "I— You must be Wolfgang and Felix?" She peers into the church, looking slightly dismayed at the surroundings.

Wolfgang nods numbly, and her attention snaps back to him.

"Great! Okay, so Nomi gave me this address," she says quickly. "You know she got sent to boarding school, right?"

"We figured, yeah," Felix says. "Is she okay?"

"She's dealing," shrugs Amanita. "I've only talked to her once; she's only allowed one phone call a month or something completely draconian like that."

"Shit," mutters Felix.

"I know right? And each call can only be five minutes, so we didn't get to chat much, but she sounded... okay. Anyway, she talked a lot about you two, and it was all a bit jumbled since she was talking so fast, but from what I could gather she ran away from home last month and you two took her in for a night, and you're the sweetest boys she's ever met but also in dire need of blankets and non-perishable foods, so—" She reaches into the garbage bag and pulls out a folded blanket. "—I'm here to deliver!"

"Fuck yes," cries Felix, grabbing the blanket.

The girl sets down the bag and smiles. "And don't worry about the cost or anything," she rattles off. "That fucking school won't let them have computers but I guess a guy she met there is home for spring break and he's some kind of genius who hacked into Nomi's evil parents' bank account and wired me a buttload of money and it's all untraceable or something so—" She takes a deep breath. "Anyway, I hope you find this stuff useful!" she says brightly. She holds the bag aloft and Wolfgang watches carefully as Felix takes it from her and hoists it over the threshold of the church.

"Thank you so much," Felix says wonderingly, one hand still clutching the blanket.

"You're so welcome," beams the girl. Then: "Oh!" she exclaims. "My name is Amanita Caplan, by the way! I'm Nomi's friend from high school." She holds out her hand, which Felix shakes.

"Felix. That's Wolfie. Welcome to our, uh, home," he grins. He gestures toward the interior of the church. "You can—"

"Actually, you can go now," Wolfgang cuts him off sharply.

Because he's heard the name Caplan before. It was years ago, in another life, but he'll never forget the police officer who showed up at his house one night about a reported domestic disturbance, who pulled him aside and told him that her name was Officer Caplan and she wanted to help him, who asked if his dad ever hurt him or his mom and looked at him with such sad fucking eyes when he said no, never.

And Wolfgang remembers that this Amanita Caplan had had those exact same sad eyes when she'd seen how he and Felix were living, and he thinks of what Officer Caplan would say if her daughter told her about the poor homeless kids she met, and fuck.

"Seriously, you need to go," he tells the girl, who looks so confused that Wolfgang lowers his gaze uncomfortably. "You'll draw attention to this place standing at the door like that," he mumbles.

"Well, you could invite me in," she cajoles.

"Yeah. Or not," says Wolfgang. He lifts his face and glares at her, hard and steely.

Felix is staring at him like he wants to bash his head against the wall, but he says nothing.

The girl, for her part, seems unfazed. "Suit yourself," she shrugs. She glances at Felix, then back at Wolfgang, and hazards a small smile. "I— I go to college in California but I'm here on break for another week. So I can come back," she offers, "if—"

"No," says Wolfgang definitively, taking a step forward, "you're not coming back, you got that? And you're not going to tell a fucking soul about us, or where we're living, or anything, you fucking hear me?"

The girl nods once, still seemingly unintimidated, though she can't have missed the implied threat in his words. "Loud and clear," she says calmly. "But do you want to tell me why you're being such a jackass?"

Wolfgang can't help but admire her mettle.

"Wolfgang's a jackass to everyone; don't take it personally," Felix says smoothly, stomping on Wolfgang's foot. "Right Wolfie?"

"Sure," mumbles Wolfgang.

"I see," says Amanita. Then she sighs, and looks at him with her mother's sympathetic eyes, and Wolfgang can't fucking take it anymore.

"Look, your mom's a cop," he says abruptly.

"That's true," the girl replies. She tilts her head to one side, staring at Wolfgang with sudden interest. "Do you know her?"

"I've met her," he mutters. "And she can't fucking know about us."

"She could help you," Amanita says softly. "I mean, I won't tell her," she adds in a hurry, probably at the look on Wolfgang's face, "but I'm just saying."

"No she couldn't," says Wolfgang.

"Look, you wanna come inside?" Felix asks her, shooting a please-just-be-nice-for-once look in Wolfgang's direction.

Amanita nods eagerly, and for a moment, Wolfgang wants to slam the door in her face. Instead, he sighs and steps aside to her in.

Felix grins.

o - o - o

They wake up Lito, who's heard about Nomi but still needs a quick explanation of who this Amanita girl is and why she's shown up out of nowhere like Santa Claus.

Then they sit down in a circle, the garbage bag in the center.

"Alright," says Felix gleefully, glancing at Amanita. "Let's see what's in the bag."

o - o - o

'What's in the bag' is more than Wolfgang could ever have hoped for in his wildest dreams.

There are two battery-powered thermal blankets and a pack of batteries, plus two regular blankets softer and thicker than any blanket Wolfgang's ever felt in his life. There are two winter jackets and several long-sleeved t-shirts and about six packages of socks. There are granola bars and protein bars and beef jerky and cans of tuna and boxes of crackers and cups of fruit. There's a sewing kit and hand sanitizer and bottles of water and empty ziploc baggies and an assortment of flashlights.

He, Felix, and Lito pull out each item in silent wonder before carefully laying it down on the blanket Felix has spread over the ground.

At the bottom of the bag is an envelope, containing $200 and a note that reads: "Let me know if you ever need anything. Love, Amanita," followed by a phone number.

For a few moments, all they can do is gape between the note, and the bounty, and the girl sitting across from him with her hands folded in her lap.

At last Felix whistles lowly. "Fuck," he croaks. "Thank you so fucking much."

"It was nothing," says Amanita, waving a hand dismissively. "And— I'm sorry, I didn't know there'd be three of you; I just kind of got two of everything, so—"

"Amanita," Lito says earnestly. "This is more than enough. Thank you."

"Yeah," Wolfgang echoes, staring down at the note. "Thank you."

Amanita smiles, perhaps a bit sadly. "You're welcome," she says. "I wish there was something else I could do to help."

But there's nothing else she could do, not really, and they all know it.

o - o - o

Wolfgang walks her to the door, grabs her arm before she leaves, and says, "I'm sorry."

"Don't be."

"I was an asshole." He frowns. "I just— get like that sometimes when I'm…" Scared. "Worried."

"You don't need to explain.

"No. Listen. I've done bad things, okay? Illegal things. If the police start looking into me… I know how nice your mom is, and I don't want her to—"

"Wolfgang," Amanita says. "I understand."

Wolfgang nods, even though of course she doesn't understand, she couldn't possibly understand what it's like to know you killed your father and it wasn't even self-defense because you attacked him from behind. What it's like to have been thirteen and an orphan and sleeping in the rain because you're afraid to ask anyone for help in case it turns out you're a wanted murderer. What it's like to be terrified of even the nicest cops, terrified of being brought into the station because what if they fingerprint you, and what if they fingerprinted the burned car, and your fingerprints are on file, and they send you to prison?

He takes a deep breath. "If Nomi calls you again," he says, "please tell her hi from us. And tell her she's always welcome back here."

Amanita nods, and kisses him on the cheek. "I will," she says.

"Good."

note: Felix makes Lito and Wolfgang wear the two new jackets that night because he insists his old one is sufficient, even though Wolfgang knows it's really not. The next day Wolfie spends a bigger portion of the extra 200 bucks than he'd ever admit buying Felix the warmest jacket he can find.