I am sorry this is a little shorter than usual, but I decided to split this one into two chapters or I would never have finished this week. I hope you enjoy…and as always…Thanks for the support.
Chapter 15- This Moment
Maura sat alone in the bleachers, her hands tucked into the pockets of her jacket as she waited for the Rizzoli family to arrive. A cold front had moved in that afternoon, bringing with it the threat of snow flurries, but Maura hoped it held off until the game was over. She had dressed warmly, but she worried about Jane even though she knew that Jane would keep warm by all of the running around she was sure to be doing once the game started. She looked off towards the western sky where the last vestiges of the early evening light faded behind a clouded sky. The clouds had a pink and orange hue to them as the hidden sun slipped down behind the horizon.
With a shiver, she pulled her coat closer around herself, burrowing down into the warmth. As her eyes swept over the growing crowd, her mind wandered to everything that had happened over the last week. It seemed as if time had slipped past them in a blur of activity as Jane prepared for the championship game against Northside. She hadn't seen much of Jane except from a distance during practice, but what Maura had come to look forward to were their evenings on the phone, that is until Frankie interrupted them causing Jane to fly off in a fury after her brother leaving Maura laughing on the other end of the phone.
Closing her eyes, Maura reflected back to the morning after Thanksgiving when she woke up wrapped in Jane's strong arms. It had been the most wonderful feeling she had ever experienced, that was until she realized there was someone else in the room with them. She didn't need to open her eyes to know who was standing in the doorway of her room.
With a sigh, Maura opened her eyes and carefully pulled herself from Jane's strong arms. She twisted around until she was facing her mother who had a stern look on her face as she studied the scene in front of her.
"Maura…" Constance nodded her head towards Jane. "I see you have company…" Her dark blue eyes were alight with something that Maura didn't recognize. Maura thought she saw disappointment looking back at her in her mother's gaze when their eyes met. It made her shiver slightly, it was something she wasn't used to seeing directed her way.
"Um…yeah…" Maura's voice cracked slightly as she realized what her mother must be thinking. "Nothing happened…"
"I can gather that for myself…" Constance crossed her arms as she leaned against the doorframe studying a fully clothed Jane who still seemed to be asleep. "I am not sure how I missed Jane's arrival though…"
Maura watched her mother with weary eyes. She wasn't one to feel flustered but there was something about her mother's posture that had her thinking that this wasn't going to end well for her.
"Well, that's cuz I came in through the window…" Jane sat up, her voice thick with sleep. She lazily wiped at her eyes before she stretched and yawned.
Maura noticed that her mother's eyes widened in shock by Jane's bold admission. She knew her mother prided herself on the fact that she wasn't easily surprised, but upon hearing how Jane had come to arrive in Maura's bedroom, there was only one thing that could describe what Maura saw on her mother's face and it was surprise.
"You what…?" Constance looked at Jane over Maura's shoulder, her voice slightly higher than her usual calm tone.
"Yeah…um…I climbed in the window…I didn't want to disturb you…" Jane shrugged nonchalantly.
Maura noticed Constance watching Jane carefully. "Well, I thank you for your consideration…" Constance said indifferently. Maura saw her mother hesitate for moment before she looked back at her. "I wanted to talk to you about your Christmas break."
"Okay…" Maura sighed, knowing she wouldn't like what her mother was going to say.
"You will be accompanying me to Paris…" Constance said with finality to her voice. Maura nodded, knowing there would be no argument. "And you…" She looked at Jane. "I expect you to leave through the front door…"
Jane gave Maura a wounded look as she shifted off of the bed.
Constance stepped out of the room to give them a moment. It was a move that surprised Maura and had her wondering why her mother would do such a thing.
"I'll call you later beautiful…" Jane leaned over to give Maura a gentle kiss, but before she could pull away, Maura had her arms around Jane's neck holding her close. Before they could kiss again, they were interrupted by Constance clearing her throat from the open door.
"Now Jane…" Constance said as she stepped away from the door so Jane could move past her.
"We'll talk later…" She gave Maura a measured look that spoke volumes. All Maura could do was watch Jane leave, followed by her mother as they left her alone in her room.
Maura was roused from her thoughts when she felt the warmth of another body slip into the seat next to her. She didn't have to look to know it was Angela; the older woman had a soothing presence about her that Maura had come to recognize and crave.
"Is everything okay Maura?" Angela sat next the young woman who was wearing a thoughtful look on her face. She felt a sudden surge of sympathy wash over her as she saw the worried expression. Angela thought that no one could ever understand how hard it was for her to watch her daughter get pummeled out on the football field every Friday, but as she watched Maura, she knew she wasn't alone anymore.
"Oh, yes…I was just thinking about Jane." Maura said. "I hope she isn't too nervous…"
"Well, why don't you go down to the locker room and check on her. There is still plenty of time before the game starts." Angela put her hand on Maura's. She wasn't sure why she had suggested it, but for some reason she knew in her heart that both young women needed to see each other before the game started.
Maura looked at Angela with a note of curiosity. She wanted nothing more than to go check on Jane but she wasn't sure it was a good idea. "Are you sure I won't distract her?" Maura asked.
"No…I think she would like to see you. You have a calming effect on her Maura…I think it would do you both some good." Angela gave Maura a small smile. She had seen the faraway look in Maura's eyes as she approached, knowing exactly what or who Maura was thinking about. "Go on…" Angela gently squeezed Maura's hand as she bumped her with her shoulder to nudge her forward.
"Okay…" Maura still seemed slightly distracted by her thoughts, but she gave Angela a genuine smile.
As Angela watched Maura make her way down the bleachers towards the field, Frank sat next to her.
"Where is she going?" His voice was slightly gruff, tinged with irritation. "Not to bother Janie I hope."
Tilting her head to the side to get a better look at her husband in the early evening light, she wasn't sure she liked the look he was giving her.
"As a matter of fact…she is…" Angela's voice held the same level of irritation at Frank's choice of words.
"Why would she do that…she'll only be a distraction…"Frank crossed his arms, eyeing Maura as she walked across the field towards the locker rooms.
"I told her too." Angela gave Frank a look that dared him to question her. "She needs this…" Angela looked back at Maura watching her disappear behind a set of doors.
"Who…Janie or Maura?" Frank couldn't hide the sarcasm in his voice. He winced slightly as he realized how it must have sounded.
"Don't Frank…" Angela felt her hands ball up into fists as her temper rose, so she shoved them into the pockets of her jacket. She wasn't ready to have this conversation with him. She had a feeling that things had changed between Maura and Jane, but she wasn't willing to discuss it with Frank yet.
"Don't what Angela?" He questioned his tone turning soft. "We need to talk about this…" Frank had sensed that something was going on, something he wasn't privy to. It hurt him to think that he didn't know who his daughter really was.
"I won't do this here…not now." She turned to look at him. Angela recognized sadness as his dark brown eyes turned a shade darker. "Leave it be Frank…" Her light hazel eyes looked back into his in a pleading way.
"Okay…but this conversation isn't over." He said with a sigh as he stood up. "I'm gonna go get a soda…want anything."
Angela shook her head in the negative as Frank walked away. They had touched on the subject briefly after Jane had come home the morning after spending the night at Maura's. She knew in her heart that the young women had feelings for each other, but it didn't seem to bother her as much as she thought it would. When Frank broached the subject with her about how different Jane acted around Maura, how unsure and nervous she seemed to get, Angela tried to push it off on the upcoming championship game. He seemed to buy that idea, but still seemed hesitant when talking about Maura.
With a sigh, Angela leaned back in her seat to watch the pregame preparations, knowing that Maura was right where she should be, with Jane.
Jane could feel the tension stretching across her shoulders as she leaned against her open locker. With her hands pressed firmly against each side of the dark cavern that held her uniform, she took a deep breath before exhaling slowly. She could feel the nervous fluttering in her stomach as she tried to calm herself with another deep breath. She wasn't really looking at anything with her unfocused gaze but she knew there were things she needed to do to get ready for the championship game.
She let out a long anxious sigh as she realized that win or lose, this would be her last game. This was it, the last game she would ever play in. Blinking a few times, she tried to focus on the red jersey that hung in front of her. She didn't want to admit to herself that she was almost afraid to put it on. A sudden rush of sadness fell over her at the realization that this would be the last time she would wear it. She knew there would be a feeling of finality when she slipped into her uniform and it almost overwhelmed her. She felt a sudden loss as she realized she was going to miss everything about playing the game she had come to love. With a tinge of irritation, she swiped at the single tear that rolled down her cheek.
Standing in the doorway watching Jane, Maura felt frozen in the moment. She could see Jane's silhouette, her strong profile cast in a light shadow. Jane was standing at her locker in a pair of athletic boxers and sports bra. It was the first time that Maura had ever seen so much of Jane's skin exposed. The effect was exhilarating as Maura's eyes swept over Jane's lean, yet muscular figure. Even though Jane still stood in a shadow, Maura could see what up until that moment she had only imagined.
Jane looked nervous and Maura wasn't used to seeing Jane nervous. Jane was all swagger and confidence when she was wearing her football uniform and for the first time since she had known her, Maura didn't see that. It hadn't gone unnoticed that Jane was taking deep breaths to steady her nerves, just like Maura had taught her. Seeing just the slightest amount of tension leave Jane's strong shoulders brought a small smile to Maura's face. It might not be much, but Maura thought it was enough.
Quietly Maura slipped into the locker room without making a sound. She could see that Jane was studying the inside of her locker with such an intense interest that she wouldn't notice anything happening around her. Taking advantage of Jane's inattention, Maura moved until she was standing directly behind her. She wrapped her arms around Jane's waist as she pressed herself against the strong back in front of her. Placing her cheek against the warm skin of Jane's shoulders, Maura let out a contented sigh.
"Hey…" Maura whispered, hesitant to break the spell Jane was under.
"Hey yourself beautiful…" Jane placed her left hand on Maura's soft warm hand's that were overlapped just below her sports bra, touching the bare skin of her stomach. The feeling of Maura touching her exposed flesh should have sent a fire throughout her body, but Jane felt a steady calm in the silent strength that radiated off of Maura. She knew that the touch was meant to calm, not inflame and she was thankful for the effort.
"You okay?" Maura asked even though she could hear Jane's rapid heartbeat as she held her close.
With a sigh, Jane shook her head. Maura could feel the slight tremor that moved through Jane's body as she let out a shaky breath. Even though it was the first time Maura had touched Jane's bare skin in such a way, Maura was only offering her support at the moment, nothing more.
"No, but you being here helps…" Jane turned in Maura's arms so they were facing each other. She looked down at the wide eyes filled with worry and suddenly felt herself being pulled into the depths of hazel and green. Wrapping her arms around the smaller body, she tightened her hold.
"Do you need some help getting ready?" Maura looked up to find Jane grinning crookedly at her. "What?" A look of confusion crossed her face as she tried to figure out why Jane was grinning at her.
"Well…" Jane said as she held Maura tighter. "Aren't you supposed to be offering to undress me instead of offering to dress me?"
Maura giggled against the warm skin of Jane's neck as she snuggled into the softness she found there. "I would prefer that…but seeing as you have a championship to win…I think I might be persuaded to help you get ready…"
"I suppose that would be nice…" Jane said as she let go of the warmth that had calmed her. Reaching into her locker, she pulled out a thermal long sleeved shirt and slipped it over her head.
Maura frowned at the loss of contact as she watched Jane cover up the expanse of skin that had been revealed to her.
"Here…" Jane said as she grabbed her shoulder pads from her locker. With experienced hands, she slipped the pads over her head until they came to rest on her shoulders. "You could help me tie this…"
Maura took a tentative step towards Jane. She couldn't help but equate the tall figure in front of her to a gladiator getting ready for battle. Reaching out to take the laces of the shoulder pads, Maura tied them into a small bow. "Like this?" She asked as she looked up at Jane.
"Well, only if you want them to come off of me during the game." Jane tried not to smile. "Tie it in a knot please."
"Oh, of course…." Maura untied the strings and then retied them with a strong knot. "Are you nervous?" She didn't let go of the strings as Jane took her hands in her own.
"Yep… I feel like throwing up. I don't think I've ever been so nervous in my life." Jane sighed, looking into to Maura's soft hazel eyes.
"You'd be a fool not to be, and you're not a fool." Maura gave Jane's hands a reassuring squeeze before letting go so she could wrap her arms around Jane's waist. She pulled her close, resting her cheek against the bulky shoulder pads. "These are really uncomfortable, aren't they?" Maura mused out loud.
Jane laughed as she put her arms around Maura allowing her chin to rest on the top of Maura's head. "Yep…" She barely whispered.
Maura looked up at her. "You're going to be great out there. You always are."
Jane tried to smile, but she had a sad look in her eyes. "I'm gonna miss it though."
"I know, but it doesn't define you. You will still be Jane, even if you are no longer Jane the Quarterback." Maura squeezed her tighter.
Jane reached down, taking Maura's chin in her hand. She tilted her head back so she could look at her before she leaned down to place a soft, gentle kiss on warm lips.
"Will you go with me tonight to the after party? Hopefully it will be a victory party." Jane implored as she reluctantly pulled away from Maura's mouth.
"I will if you want me to." Maura fought the desire to try to continue the kiss she wasn't ready to let go of.
"I want you to." Jane said before reaching over Maura's head, taking her jersey off the hook it was hanging on. "Will you help me put this on?"
"Sure." Maura let go of Jane's waist. She helped her pull the jersey over her head and shoulder pads as if she had done so many times before.
"You know this is the first time you've come to see me in the locker room before a game." It was more of an observation than a statement.
"I guess I never thought you needed me to be here, until tonight." Maura tried to smooth the jersey out over Jane's arms.
Jane smiled that dazzling smile that always took Maura's breath away. "I appreciate you being here." She said as she ran her fingers through Maura's hair, tucking a stray strand behind her ear, letting her fingers linger over the soft warm skin.
"I should probably get out there with your parents." Maura sighed as she pushed up on to her toes to reach Jane's cheek where she placed a tender kiss. "You'll do great. I'll see you after."
Jane nodded and tried to look stoic even though her heart was pounding in her ears. It wasn't just the game that had her pulse racing, but having Maura this close to her was starting to have an effect on her. The soft kisses and gentle touches were almost enough to rattle Jane's nerves.
Maura had hoped that she would be able to calm Jane, but she could feel the tension in Jane's body as she leaned in to hug her one more time.
As Maura turned to leave, Jane reached out placing a hand on her arm to stop her. "Hey Maur…Thanks." She ducked her head, all of a sudden feeling shy in Maura's presence.
Jane's touch stopped Maura from leaving and she turned around to see a shy look on Jane's face. With a shaky hand, Maura reached out to place the palm of her hand on Jane's cheek. Allowing her thumb to gently stroke the soft skin of Jane's face, Maura smiled. "Anytime my sweet Jane…" Maura leaned forward, pushing herself up on her toes again so she could reach Jane's lips. With the softest of touches she brushed her lips across Jane's. "Now…go win that championship…" She said with a wink before turning to leave Jane standing alone in the locker room.
Shaking her head, Jane watched Maura leave. Her lips still tingled from the light kiss Maura had left her with. Even though her body was buzzing with a need for Maura, a wave of calm washed over her that she knew would help carry her through the most important game of her life. With a small smile Jane realized that win or lose, she would always be a champion to Maura. With that last thought, she reached for the rest of her uniform to finish getting ready.
As Maura made her way back up to her seat next to Angela, she had a relaxed smile on her face that was easily noticeable. When Maura sat next to Angela, she knew she had made the right decision in suggesting that Maura go see Jane.
"Everything alright with Janie?" Angela asked as Maura settled in her seat next to Angela.
"Yes…I think she's going to be okay…" Maura smiled at Angela causing the other woman to smile back.
"Good…" Angela took Maura's hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. "Would it be wrong of me to say that I can't wait for this to be over with?" She turned to Maura, a worried look on her face.
"Absolutely not…I feel the same way." Maura squeezed Angela's hand back.
"Well, I guess it's time…" Angela nodded her chin towards the football field where the players had started to line up, waiting to be announced. "There she is."
As Jane stood at the edge of the football field, waiting for her name to be called so she could take her place next to her team mates, she did her best to commit to memory everything that was happening around her. She wanted to remember the way the grass felt under her feet, the way the air smelled of hamburgers, popcorn, and french fries and the sound of the crowd when they cheered as each player was announced. It would be impossible to not let the gravity of the moment affect her as excitement bubbled up in her stomach when her name was called. With a quick sweep of her eyes across the crowded stands, she smiled when she saw Maura sitting with her family. In that moment she knew the one thing she would always remember about that day was the love shining back at her from Maura's eyes as she trotted out onto the field with the intention of walking away with a championship.
When Maura's eyes found Jane, standing tall and confident, she felt a flutter in the pit of her stomach. She was so happy that she was able to share this moment with Jane. When Maura saw Jane look their way with a broad smile on her face, she felt momentarily breathless.
Angela watched Maura's response when Jane looked their way, a huge smile on her face. She had come to pretty much accept the idea that what Maura and Jane shared was deeper than friendship. It was something she knew she couldn't control, something that Jane would have to work through on her own. Angela just hoped that Jane would be able to accept the uphill battle she was sure to endure. Settling down in her seat, Angela prepared herself to watch the game of a lifetime knowing that her daughter would walk away a winner either way.
Feeling herself being lifted off of the ground as her teammates carried her across the field in a show of victory, Jane couldn't contain her smile. It had been a close game, but she had pulled out all of the stops, giving her all. She had even scored the last touchdown herself to win the game. The injuries had been kept to a minimum except for the bloody nose she received when she had been sacked by a linebacker who seemed to have a vendetta against her. One timeout was all she needed to stem the blood flow before she headed back out to finish the job she had started. And so the game came to an end with Jane being carried off of the field before being deposited into Maura's anxiously awaiting arms.
Jane buried her face in the honey blonde hair that reminded her of sunshine and warmth. Strong arms held her close as she tried to catch her breath after being put down by her cheering teammates. She was so happy that Maura's arms had found her first in the crowd that had gathered on the field. Jane nuzzled deeper into the silky, soft hair as she held on tight to the smaller body that was now pressed firmly against her.
"I can't believe it…" Jane was breathless with excitement as she looked down into Maura's eyes. "We won…"
"I never doubted for a minute…" Maura laid her check against Jane's bulky shoulder pads, sighing at the contact.
Resting her chin on top of Maura's head, Jane closed her eyes to try to hold back the tears that threaten to overcome her. As she struggled to control her emotions, she felt a smaller body careen into her from behind distracting her. Looking over her shoulder she saw Tommy looking up at her with pride and adoration.
"You did it Janie…" He smiled up at her.
Reluctantly she let go of Maura so she could hug her little brother back. Jane instantly missed the contact with Maura, giving her a crooked grin in apology as she spun around to wrap her arms around Tommy.
"Hey…what about me?" Frankie jumped into the fray as he threw his arms around his brother and sister.
Maura stood back to watch the three siblings hugging each other with huge matching grins on their faces. Jane was still the tallest in the bunch and she looked over Tommy to wink at Maura, her dimples on full display. Maura could feel her face flush at the look in Jane's eyes that seemed to convey everything at once. A hand on her shoulder startled her but in an instant she knew who it belonged to.
"Well…it's all over for now…that is until baseball season starts. At least that isn't a contact sport." Angela stepped closer to Maura as the gathering crowd jostled them around.
Maura nodded as she looked over to see Frank approaching, a look of pure pride on his face as watched Jane and Frankie. When their eyes met, he gave her a shy smile and a nod of acknowledgement as he walked past her and Angela to join his kids in a family hug.
"You should be with them." Maura tilted her head towards Frank to indicate what she meant.
"Nah…I'll wait until I can smother them with kisses and not embarrass them." Angela wrapped her arm around Maura's shoulder. She pulled the younger woman closer to her and placed a kiss on Maura's cheek that was tinged pink from the cold evening air. "But you don't mind, do you?" Angela's hazel eyes held a playful twinkle that Maura couldn't resist.
"No…I don't mind at all…" Maura put her arm around Angela's waist. She leaned her head against the taller woman's shoulder, letting out a sigh at the comfortable contact.
"I like having you around Maura…" Angela gave Maura a gentle squeeze as they watched more and more people jump into the celebration before them. "It's like I have another daughter." When Maura didn't say anything, Angela looked down to see tears running down Maura's cheeks. "Oh honey…what's wrong?"
Maura took a few deep breaths before wiping the tears away. "I'm not really comfortable with displays of emotion…I've never really had that in my life…" Maura paused as she chose her words carefully. "But, I feel so comfortable with you…you make it easy…" She looked up into concerned hazel eyes. "My mother and I aren't very close, not like you and Jane are. Being with your family makes me realize what I have been missing my whole life…"
"Oh Maura…" Angela couldn't stop herself from enveloping Maura in protective hug. "I'm so sorry…"
"That's just it…in the short time I've know you, you've given me so much more than my parents ever could." Maura hugged Angela back. "But please don't think less of them…I just don't think any of us know how to ask for that kind of love."
"No child should ever have to ask for love from their parents Maura…" Angela could feel her heart breaking. "I promise that no matter what happens today…tomorrow…ten years from now…I will always be here for you my dear."
Maura knew that Angela meant every word she said and it comforted her knowing that there was someone out there that she could turn to. "Thank you…" Her voice was hoarse with emotions she wasn't' used to expressing.
"I only ask that you take care of my daughter…" Angela whispered above Maura's head, not thinking that she could be heard.
When Maura heard Angela asking her to take of Jane, she realized that their secret was quickly becoming not so secret. She decided not to say anything, knowing in her heart that Angela wasn't ready for that conversation and if truth be told, neither was she.
