Chapter 15: Of Blackouts and Memory Loss

A soft knock on her door startled her from her daze.

"Come in" she called as she hastily begin arranging her piles and piles of paperwork in an effort to look busy.

"Sui Feng! How was the checkup?" she stood up and walked towards the girl in question. More like the woman in question but my little bee… Her thought trailed off as she came to a stop in front of Sui Feng.

"I'm fine Yoruichi-sama. Unohana-taichou said that there is no way of using kido to heal me and my memories would either be lost forever or they would come back to me in time. I'm just… I'm just…"

With that Sui Feng started bashing her head with her hands.

"Why can't I get them back! Why! You stupid stupid stupid head!"

"Hey, hey, hey. It's okay Sui, it's okay. Take your time. Don't hurry it. Somethings just can't be rushed." Like you remembering what we are, what you are to me. She reached out and stilled Sui Feng's fists to her head. She pulled the stunned woman into her arms and held her close to her. "It's okay, take your time. You have all the time in the world. I would never leave you. Wherever you are Sui, there I'll be." She whispered into Sui Feng's hair as her arms tightened on their own accord. The familiar scent of her lover threatens to overwhelm her.

- In the meantime -

Sui Feng was shocked. The embrace felt familiar. Too familiar to be true. Have we…? Have I? Are we? Have we ever? No, no. It can't be. She shake her head hard. Oh no. No, no, no, no, no. Not again… The constant pounding at the back of her head suddenly grew exponential in size as fragments of memories came back to her like a spoilt film reel. Youruichi-sama hugging…me? The memories came to her jumbled. Random bits of Yoruichi laughing, smiling, and staring at her as though she is the only one in the world. The raw hatred she felt towards Yoruichi. The cherry blossoms. Their tree. The captain of the sixth division. Isn't Ginrei the captain and not… that looks like Kuchiki Byakuya?! The anguish she felt when she heard that Yoruichi is getting married to Kuchiki Byakuya. "I would never leave you." Their training. The full moon. The intense fight to the death between her and Yoruichi. Her breakdown. Yoruichi teaching her the proper way to hold her sword. "Wherever you are Sui, there I'll be." Kissing Yoruichi, doing her paperwork for her. Yoruichi showing up with lacerations all over her body. "If I have to choose between being clan head and you, it isn't even a choice" Yoruichi leaning in and… suddenly it all went black.

Yoruichi knew something was wrong the minute Sui Feng started shaking her head in her arms. What is wr- "Sui Feng!" she cried as her lover's form went limp and her head lolled to the side. "Hang in there my love, I'm getting help." She murmured as she shunpoed to the 4th division at top speed.

- Entrance of the 4th Division Barracks -

"INCOMING! GET UNOHANA TAICHOU HERE, NOW!" she screamed as her speed never decreasing, preparing to trample through the entire 4th to look for the said captain if she need to.

"MOVE IT YOU MAGGOTS. GET HER HERE NOW!"

Members of the 4th division was shocked still as Yoruichi barreled into their barracks.

"WHAT ARE YOU ALL STANDING THERE FOR?! DON'T YOU KNOW THIS IS AN EMERGENCY?! WE HAVE AN EMERGENCY! GET YOUR ASSES IN PLACE AND GET MOVING!"

"Help is coming my love. Hold on. Please don't die on me. I don't know what I would do without you."

"What is the commo-" the words died on her lips when she saw Yoruichi carrying an unconscious Sui Feng.

"Place her here." She gestured to the empty bed next to her.

"Isane, I need you to clear the room and get these supplies." Unohana jotted something down on a notepad and gave it to her vice-captain.

"Hai, Unohana-taichou! Mina-san, please we need to room. Taichou has the situation under control and there are sick people which we should be looking after. Get to your duties everyone!" Isane started herding people out as she moved to get to the supply closet.

"Oh and Isane, see that word of this" she gestured at Yoruichi, who was currently looking at Sui Feng as though her world has ended "don't get out."

"Hai, Unohana-taichou. I'll get on it right away." With that, Isane left to do damage control.

"Yoruichi-san?"

"Yoruichi-san"

"Yoruichi-san!"

Seeing the lack of response from the leader of Omitsukido, she sighed and shoved the said woman hard.

"WHAT THE F-"

"Unohana-san…"

"Unohana-san… Sui… She… I…"

"I… She… Unohana-san, help…"

Yoruichi began breaking down upon realizing that Unohana Retsu was in the room with her.

"Calm down and tell me what happened"

Yoruichi turned to her with a broken look on her face and nodded.

"She came back from the checkup looking a little distracted so I asked her if there is anything out of the ordinary which you said that might have affected her but she reported no. Then…then…then"

Yoruichi heaved as she took in a shuddering breath, attempting to get her hysterics under control.

"She lost her temper with herself and started bashing her own head with her fists. So I reached out and tried to stop her. I grabbed her fists before they could do further damage to her head and.. an-"

She hiccupped.

"And I must have reacted on instinct. Seeing her beat herself up for something that isn't her fault, I forgot what you said about treating her the way I did before, the way I did 110years ago. It's all my fault!"

She wailed and just before she could start up again, Unohana laid a comforting hand on her shoulder and asked in a soft calm voice

"So what did you do after that?"

"I pulled her in and hugged her and I told her it's okay she has all the time in the world that I would never leave her and that wherever she is, there I'll be."

"Have you said anything like that to her before in the past? In a similar manner or position"

"Have I..." she trailed off as she was hit with a flashback (*).

"Yoruichi-san?" Unohana waved a hand in front of the said woman's face.

Yoruichi blinked rapidly bringing herself back to the present.

"I did. When I thought that the decision of the elders to marry me off to Byakuya was a dream when it is in fact a reality and she had a dream that I married him and left her."

"Hmmm. Was she in distressed then? Or perhaps under quite a lot of stress during the days leading up to that moment?"

"I think so? I can't really remember. All I know was that I was very annoyed and angry at the elders and I went to the training grounds to work off some of the annoyance and frustrations. The next thing I know I'm waking up next to her in our bed dressed in clean clothes. It could be possible that I forgot to tell her that I would be back late and caused her to worry incessantly."

"Something that you said to her must have contributed to her blackout. I have my suspicions for a while now that Sui-Feng taichou has been having recurring dreams. Might be her lost memories coming back to her as a dream. Yoruichi-san, Sui Feng taichou's repressed memories are mostly either about you or related to you."

"Does this mean that being around me would cause her to blackout like she did? Like it could be something I said or did that triggered it?"

"Yes and no. The issue that we face with temporary memory loss or rather, just memory loss in general is that there is no clear paths or guidelines as to why the patients would lose the memories and how to get them back. Sui Feng taichou has been exhibiting signs which points to her emotions being the trigger for her blackouts and hopefully, the return of her memories. Her emotions which are caused by you and/or your actions."

"Oookkayyy… so does this mean that I should carry on doing what I'm currently doing or I should start treating her the way I did before that sicko Mabashi got to her?"

"The only thing we know for sure now is that her blackouts are tied to her lost memories. It seems as though she is subconsciously trying to keep the memories suppressed while consciously trying to recall them. Her mind is at war with itself. Has she reported any difficulties in communicating with her zanpakuto?"

"Not that I know of, but she is unable to unleash her shikai ever since waking up."

"There could be a reason behind it. Let me research into it and find out. Take care, Yoruichi-san."

Just as she was about to leave, a tanned hand held onto her wrist stopping her.

"Retsu"

"Yes?"

"Thank you. For everything."

"It's not an issue."

"About my entrance…"

"It's already been taken care of. Look after her."

Yoruichi nodded, her gaze never leaving the prone form on the bed in front of her.

"Wake up my love. I can't lose you Sui Feng. I wouldn't know how to continue living if you were to die on me."

She whispered as she placed a kiss on the forehead of her little bee's and another on her lips.

AN: okay. Rights. What can I say. It is terrible of me. I know. Don't make promises I can't keep. I know that too. 2014 was a terrible terrible terrible year for me. And 2015 so far has been a rather busy one. I had this chapter mapped out a while back but it seems that my muse has decided to return with a vengeance and broke it up into 2 chapters. I know the issue of Yoruichi's impending marriage to Byakuya has yet to be addressed, don't worry. It will be addressed soon. For all those who are still reading this work of mine, I thank you from the bottom of my heart. I was shock to see the year I begin this story and I know how frustrating it gets when a story don't seem to have an end. Thank you all so much for the kind words and reviews over the years. I can't promise to stick to a schedule as my work schedule is erratic and my muse is terribly temperamental. But I would strive to keep this story going and finish it. And if you would all be so kind as to leave me with your thoughts on the latest chapter, it would make my day.

PS. for (*) please see chapter 3 of the story