A/N:
DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of the characters.
SPECIAL SHOUTOUT to two crazy people I recently 'met.' I'm supposed to call you with codenames but I forgot them haha, so you're just gonna have to figure out that this chapter is for you. (the other one just cooked rice for the first time and the other one just recently watched a basketball game in her friend's house) =))
WARNING: Not fluffy. Not (that) angsty. But the ending will probably make you want to kill me.
17
Alex woke up after what felt like only five seconds of closing her eyes. The only difference was that it was no longer dark inside the room with the stream of light coming from outside. The first thing that Alex noticed though was the aching of her muscles that she was sure wasn't caused by her sleeping position the whole night, slouched down against the side of Nicky's bed, with her head twisted to the side so she could rest it against the soft mattress. She also noticed the beads of sweat trickling down her face, noting that it was also not caused by the temperature inside Nicky's room.
No, it was that again, that harsh reminder of the thing she's forcefully getting out of her system, mocking her that it wasn't something she could just get rid of. She needed to fight it and right now she was fighting it harder than when it all first started. Her thoughts immediately snapped back to her girlfriend at home, wishing so bad that she wasn't going through the same thing right now, not when she wasn't there with her, not when she was out there all alone.
Alex wanted to go home to her but she knew that she couldn't just show up looking and feeling like this so she decided to stay for a while, hoping that it would eventually go away. She then stood up, her hands clammy and her heart pounding hard against her chest, not even noticing her wild-haired best friend still sleeping spread-eagled on her bed. She rushed to Nicky's living room and crashed on her couch, running her hands wildly all over her black tresses.
"No. No, no, no," Alex whispered repeatedly like a soft prayer. She breathed deeply, hoping it could help ease the pain that she was suddenly feeling, prickling on every inch of her skin. "Mind over matter," she thought as she shut her eyes, thinking of the only thing that she knew could work stronger than this fucking beast inside her head telling her the only way she could stop the pain was if she shot herself with some heroin again.
She thought of Piper, and the way her eyes lit up every time Alex would look at her. She thought of the way she would scrunch up her nose in the most adorable way possible, the way her lips would curve up into the most beautiful smile Alex had ever and probably would ever see. She thought of Piper and how all of this pain would go away not when she would inject herself with the damn drugs again, but when Piper would stop feeling the pain herself.
-o-o-o-
Alex was outside her and Piper's hotel room, sitting on the bed placed on the patio as she looked all over the ocean that seemed to have lost all its power to calm her whenever she was feeling restless. She had been up for almost an hour now, not having been able to sleep properly the night before, scared that Piper would wake up and freak out due to the starting symptoms of her withdrawal. She had already booked two tickets back to the US, even though she knew that there were so many uncertainties that came along with going back home. Because it was what Piper thought she needed... and it was what Alex was going to give her.
She still couldn't stop thinking of the way Piper cried the night before, or the way she fidgeted with her hands as she started to get antsy, or the way she looked as her as if she was the biggest bitch in the world for taking away the one thing she thought was holding her together. Thinking of all of it now, Alex realized that Piper hadn't really dealt with her mother's passing the proper way, or any way at all. She hadn't dealt with any shitty thing she was going through because Alex had let her think that the drugs could do that for her, that it was all she needed to make all the pain go away. And Piper believed her. Piper believed everything Alex would say and she didn't know if it was a good thing but right now, it was her only hope in making Piper come into realization that Alex has made a massive mistake about leading her to believing this.
Alex was snapped out of her thoughts when she felt movement beside her and when she looked to her side, there stood Piper, eyes puffy but still managed to look so impossibly beautiful, hesitatingly shuffling towards her. Alex felt a slight tightening of her chest as nerves washed through her, unsure if Piper was still feeling resentful towards her and also unsure on how she would explain everything to her in a way that she would understand.
"Hey," Alex said softly, hoping that Piper would return the simple greeting, just so she would be reassured that maybe things were already okay between them.
Thankfully, Piper greeted her back, with a small hesitant smile. "Hi."
"Are you still... are you still mad at me?"
Alex saw regret flash across Piper's eyes as her strides widened to reach her faster. When Piper was already on the bed beside her, she immediately flung her arms around her neck as she buried her face at the crook of her shoulder. Alex instantly snaked her arms around Piper's waist, pulling her into her body closer as she welcomed the warmth it always brought her that she'd missed last night.
"No," Piper whispered, tightening her grip on her. "I'm sorry I acted that way last night, Al. I didn't know what I was doing. I'm sorry."
Alex let out the breath she didn't even know she was holding as relief washed through her. "Hey," Alex brushed Piper's hair with her fingers as she pressed a soft kissed on her temple. "It's okay, you don't have to apologize. I understand."
Piper pulled away to look Alex in the eye, her arms still loosely wounded around her neck. "Do you forgive me?"
Alex smiled, still wondering how Piper could make all the littlest things so damn adorable. "I don't need to. I'm not mad. Come here." Alex and Piper closed the gap between them at the same time, bringing their lips together, in a sweet, chaste kiss.
When they pulled apart, Piper shuffled her body closer to Alex, her arms going downwards to circle them around her girlfriend's waist. She rested her forehead on her shoulder and they stayed like that for a while, enjoying the peace that was still there while it lasted. And as if reading Alex's thoughts, about what that was going on with them right now, Piper softly blurted out, "Alex, I'm scared."
And Alex knew why Piper was. She knew because she was scared, too. They were okay right now, but eventually, and soon, the withdrawal symptoms are gonna come again and Alex wasn't sure if she could fight them again this time. But she couldn't tell Piper that. She couldn't tell her that she was also lost herself because without the drugs, she was the only one left that could hold Piper together.
And she was gonna do just that.
"I know, Piper. I'm sorry," she once again said, feeling as if those words were slowly losing their meaning because of how much she's been using them lately. She could feel Piper bring herself closer to her as if telling her that it was okay, that she was okay. At least that's what Alex wanted herself to believe. "Do you trust me?"
Piper once again untangled herself from Alex so she could look at her, and Alex swore looking into Piper's eyes was all she needed to assure herself that yes, everything was eventually going to be okay. "I do, Al. I'd trust you with my life, you know that."
Alex smiled but she still couldn't help but feel bad about this because it was also because of that trust that she and Piper were in this mess right now. But she had to push all the negative thoughts deep within her and focus on what this meant for both of them. "Okay. Good. So you have to believe me when I say this." She cupped Piper's face and looked directly into her eyes, "...we're going to be okay. I swear to God I won't let anything happen to you."
Piper nodded and gave her a soft smile, and Alex wasn't sure if she believed her but even if she didn't, Alex had no other choice but to live up to her promise. "I know," the blonde said and she said it without any hint of doubt that Alex's need to protect Piper from all of this only grew stronger.
"So, it's a deal, right? We're never gonna touch that thing again?" Alex hated it but she couldn't help but feel a sense of loss, as if she's throwing away something so good. Even though she already knew that it was the right thing to do, she also knew that the drugs still had a strong hold on her so she had to figure out a way to get rid of it as soon as she could.
"Yeah, but..." Alex could see the struggle in Piper's eyes... "Alex, how would we do that? I mean, just the thought of that makes me feel like you're cutting off one of my limbs or something. I don't—" Piper stopped and Alex knew she felt guilty for feeling this way because she suddenly couldn't look at her.
"Babe, look at me." Piper shook her head as she looked at anywhere but Alex."Please?" And slowly, Piper lifted her head and averted her eyes towards her girlfriend. "We'll find a way." But Alex already knew the only way they could do this. And it wasn't an option she was sure she was willing to take, and neither was Piper. "We can... we can go to rehab."
Fear flashed through Piper's eyes as she took in what Alex just suggested. "No... no, Alex. We can't do that." She kept shaking her head she thought it would fall off. "You can't. They're gonna take us away from each other. I can't have that. Please, not rehab. You have to find another way," Piper was on the verge of tears now, just the thought of losing Alex was breaking her to pieces.
"Okay, okay babe. I'm sorry. Ssshhh," Alex cupped Piper's face and made her look at her. "No rehab. We'll think of something else." She then pulled Piper into a hug, feeling relieved that rehab was out of the question now. She also didn't like the idea because she knew that there was no way they were gonna put her and Piper in the same one if ever. She wanted to be there for Piper if they would fight this. She needed to, and any other option was just not acceptable.
-o-o-o-
Alex could feel her heart start to beat so much faster and her itch to shoot herself with some drugs was getting stronger by the second. She lifted her legs on the couch as she tucked her knees hugging them, holding on to them just so she could stop the trembling of her entire body. She tried to think... tried to put into her head that she didn't need the drugs. She kept thinking of this over and over and over but she was already in so much pain that she'd even thought that death would probably hurt less than this, that one shot was all it took for it to go away.
"Hey, Vause."
Alex heard Nicky's voice from behind her and she only gave her a quick glance before pressing her face back on her knees, her knuckles so tightly shut she was pretty certain her finger nails were gonna leave a mark on her palm forever.
"Holy shit," muttered Nicky loud enough for Alex to hear her.
Alex could hear steps behind her but she couldn't bring herself to look at what her best friend was doing because all she could focus on right at that moment was her desperate need for the drugs, and why she couldn't have them.
A few seconds later, Nicky was at her side holding out a glass of water to her. Alex shook her head, not wanting to drink. It wasn't what she needed. Why was no one giving her what she needed?
"Come on, Alex. Just drink."
Alex finally took the glass but her hands were shaking too much she almost spilled it as she brought the glass to her lips. She only took a few sips knowing it wasn't gonna help anyway.
Nicky took back the glass and settled it on the center table before focusing back on Alex as she rubbed her back up and down. "Breathe, Alex. Come on, just breathe."
"Oh God, Oh God..." muttered Alex repeatedly. She clutched her shirt tightly, as she fidgeted on the couch. She knew she was going to lose it any second now. She needed something to hold onto, but there was none and it was driving her insane.
"Hey, hey Alex. Listen to me," Nicky was anxious, her voice cracking as she spoke. "Think about something else... anything. Think about Piper." Nicky could feel Alex try and focus her attention on her so she kept going, hoping to all gods who existed that this would work. "Remember that thing she does when she tries to wink but does it the wrong way that you find so damn fucking cute? Or... or that time when we went out and she was so drunk and she was dancing and she fell on her ass and we all just laughed at her." She could see Alex starting to calm a little and Nicky could almost breathe a sigh of relief. But she also knew that it was not yet enough. "Think about how much she loves you, Alex. Piper loves you so damn much, so you couldn't let this win over you."
And much to Alex's surprise, her breathing started to get even. All she had to do was listen to Nicky and do what she said. It was hard at first but once she was able to manage to focus her thoughts on Piper and nothing else, she could feel herself starting to relax and the shaking of her entire body seemed to slowly subside. There was still the itch, but the mere thought of the woman she loved most in her life right now proved to be a much stronger force than the thought of her injecting herself with the abusive substance that seemed to be ruining her just a little bit more with every damn breath that she took.
-o-o-o-
When Piper woke up with a searing pain just about on every muscle of her body, her first instinct was to stretch her arm to the side to reach out for Alex. But then all she could feel was the empty side of the bed and the memories of the night before came rushing to her. Alex wasn't here. She went to Nicky because Nicky needed her so Piper had no choice but to fight this on her own.
She tried to force herself back to sleep, hoping that if she could just sleep this off, she'd wake up with Alex finally there and she could tell her what to do. She could tell her that this was nothing, that they were both going to go through this together just like she's always said ever since that day before they came back home from Bali.
But she couldn't go back to sleep. She tried shutting her mind off so she couldn't think of anything else, but all it managed to do for her was to make her think of just how much she needed to calm herself the best way, the only way, she knew: heroin.
But she made a promise to Alex. They made a pact that they weren't going to touch that thing again so Piper tried to fight the need to do so. "Alex," she whispered to herself, hoping that Alex would feel that she needed for her to come back right now, that she was only holding on to barely a thread of her rational thoughts, of what she knew the right thing to do was. "Please come back, I can't do this on my own," Piper muttered again, feeling the pillow and the sheets beneath her get soaked from her sweat.
She wanted to call Alex. She knew it was probably selfish of her to take her away knowing that Nicky needed her to but Piper didn't know what else to do. But she couldn't find her damn phone. She tried racking her brain for where she put it last but it seemed like her mind was too fuzzy to work properly so she had to settle on screaming onto her pillow, hoping that her restlessness would go away with the scream.
When Piper couldn't bear it anymore, she stood up and went outside Alex's room, pacing back and forth around the house just so she had something to do. She went to the kitchen and tried to prepare food, only to end up forgetting why she was in the kitchen in the first place. She opened the television and tried to focus on the noise coming from it, but it only added to the agitation she was already feeling.
Piper was trying too damn hard, God knew how much she was fighting this. And she knew that she wasn't doing it for herself. She was doing it for Alex... because she made a promise to her and she wanted to live up to that promise... because she knew that it was gonna hurt Alex if she found out she did something she told her she wouldn't do. It was all because of Alex.
But Alex wasn't here. And right now, Piper was losing all the fight she had in herself. She needed the drugs. She couldn't live without it no matter how much she tried. So maybe, just maybe, she could get one last shot before Alex came back. And then afterwards, when Alex would already be there to help her get through this, maybe that's when she could stop.
She knew where Alex hid her stash. And she knew that it was still there. And a small amount would probably not hurt anyway.
So maybe. Just maybe.
-o-o-o-
When Alex has started to calm down, she started telling Nicky everything, from how it all began to right now, when she and Piper had finally decided to end all of their bullshit. Nicky listened, not interrupting Alex even one bit. She was proud of what she's doing because she knew how tough this all must be for her.
"Nicky, how am I supposed to do this? All I think about every minute was how much I'm missing it. I am so fucking terrified because I just don't know what to do." Alex rubbed her face, the stress of it all taking its toll on her.
"Come on, man. You've had a whole life worth of practice in figuring things out. I know you can do this," Nicky assured her, bumping her fist slightly against Alex's shoulder.
Alex sighed, because as much as that may have been true, she didn't have Piper before. She didn't have this person she had the unbelievably strong need to protect from any consequences brought about by the choices she'd make. If she was being honest, she's actually figured out how to get Piper out of all of this. But the decision was too much of a life-changer not only for her but also for Piper that she was never sure if she could go through with it. "I've thought about breaking up with her, you know?"
"What?!" The shock in Nicky's voice was too evident that it made Alex think whether that idea was really so crazy after all.
"I've thought about it a lot of times. Every time I realize just how fucked up everything already is. She trusts me too much when she shouldn't. I brought her into this. I'm the whole fucking reason she's going through all of this right now."
Alex paused, not being able to stomach the truth. It's been out there for so long, kicking her right in the gut but she refused to acknowledge it, afraid that somehow, it was gonna be her undoing. But right now, it was smacking her right in the face and she couldn't just ignore it anymore.
"But fuck, every time I even come close to doing it, I feel like I'm slowly dying in the most painful way imaginable. Am I a horrible person, Nick? Am I the worst person there is for wanting to keep the only person who's made every fucking day of my fucking life just a whole lot more worth living?"
Nicky shook her head. "You're not a horrible person, Alex. You're one of the most amazing people I've ever known my entire life."
"Yeah?" Alex laughed humourlessly, and the sound of it came out so bleak it brought a shiver run down her spine. When did she become this person she couldn't even recognize anymore? Was it when she decided to leave her own mother to become an international drug-smuggler? Or was it when she brought Ashley to her final fate? Or was it only recently when she let drugs ruin Piper? "Even after all the drug-smuggling and using and getting everyone I know killed? Somehow, those things make it hard to believe that."
Nicky let out a frustrated grunt before facing Alex. "Why are you still doing this to yourself? It's like you're purposely sabotaging your own happiness... like you don't even give yourself a chance to be happy." Nicky looked so disappointed and Alex knew that it was the only emotion she should be expecting from everyone now, disappointment.
"Yes, you've made some mistakes," Nicky continued, before Alex could even open her mouth to say something. "But who fucking hasn't? And even if you did, that doesn't mean that every horrible thing that has ever happened to everyone around you is your own goddamned fault." She looked at Alex, wanting her to fully grasp what she was trying to say. "You have to stop doing this, Alex. If you think that you somehow did something wrong, it's about time you forgave yourself. Or else it's just gonna keep dragging you down and you damn well know that wherever things get you, Piper always follows. Is that what you want? Is that what you think you and her deserve?"
Alex's mind immediately came into full defense as she thought of just how much this wasn't what Piper deserved. No, she definitely deserved so much better and somehow, that thought had shaken something inside Alex, like it had made her realize that maybe she was also meant to deserve something more than what she thought she did. So as unconvincing as she sounded, she muttered a soft "No," getting a nod of approval from Nicky.
"Good. Now I know this is not going to be easy. But I'll do everything I can to help you get through this, okay?" Nicky's harsh tone was gone now, replaced by a soft, weary tone Alex wasn't used to hearing from her. "Even if you've been such an asshole to me these last couple of months." Now that's the Nicky Alex was used to.
Alex smiled, but she was filled with so much guilt that it probably looked like a grimace to everyone. "I'm sorry, Nicky," Alex tried to make it sound the most genuine way she could, knowing that it was all that was left for her to do after everything she's said and done to Nicky.
But Nicky didn't even look the slightest bit resentful towards her. "Eh, what's life without a little drama, right?" And just like that, Alex knew that she'd been forgiven.
"Thanks Nick. I owe you one."
"You owe me more than that, asshole." She shoved Alex hard, causing her to fall back against the couch. Nicky laughed and Alex did, too, and it had been the lightest mood she's seen Alex in a really long time, and it had made her truly believe that it was not yet too late for her or for Piper to get back on their feet again.
"Yeah. That, I deserved," Alex was smiling genuinely this time, feeling positive for the first time since she could remember. Maybe she didn't need to do all of this alone. Nicky was here, and Alex knew she wasn't going to let her down. She and Piper were gonna get through this. She was certain of that now. "So?" she then asked, remembering why she was even here in the first place.
"So what?" Nicky asked, her forehead creasing into confusion.
"Are you gonna talk about Lorna or I still have to remind you how fucking pathetic you looked last night?"
"Oh would you look at that, asshole Vause is back."
Alex chuckled as she shook her head. "Seriously, Nicky, if you ever wanna talk about it. I know I can't even sort my own shit out right now, but... you know." It was the one thing that Alex and Nicky were always good at, to have each other's back no matter what happened.
"I know. But I'm gonna be fine. I knew this was going to happen anyway. I just really needed a whole night to let it all out, you know? And right now, I'm done. I'm so ready to get right back out there, so many pussies still yet to be defiled."
"Jesus Christ," Alex said shaking her head.
She was about to say something else when they heard a soft knock on Nicky's door. They both looked at the door at the same time before looking back at each other again, both filled with confusion as to who Nicky's visitor might be. But Nicky just shrugged her shoulders as she stood up and made her way to the door. Alex looked at Nicky as she opened her door, only to be so surprised at the person standing at the doorway.
It was Lorna. Make-up filled, hair-made, wedding gown-wearing Lorna Morello.
"Lorna?" Nicky said and Alex noted the slight crack in her best friend's voice at the sight of the only woman she's ever allowed herself to fall in-love with.
Lorna was crying and it was smudging her make-up all over her face but Alex noticed that she didn't even seem to be fazed by it at all. Either that or she really had no idea she looked like a crazy psycho bride right now.
"Nicky? C-can I... can I come in?"
Nicky could only open her door wider, silently letting Lorna walk inside her apartment. She looked at Alex, confusion evident on her face, but Alex only shook her head not wanting to get into the middle of this.
"I couldn't do it," Lorna suddenly blurted out in between sobs Alex was surprised she had managed to form a complete sense that made sense. "I tried. I really did. Because it's Christopher, you know? I love him. And I should be marrying him." Lorna was looking back and forth at Nicky and Alex now, feeling as if she owed both of them an explanation on why she had suddenly come barging in inside the house of the woman she just broke the heart of.
"But when I was already there," she continued, trying to sound as coherent as possible. "I just couldn't go through with it. Everything just felt so wrong. Actually, no." She shook her head so hard, surprising both Alex and Nicky. "Everything was perfect. The flowers, the lights, the whole place looked incredibly beautiful. Except for one." Alex and Nicky waited, not realizing that both of them were holding their breaths for what they both hoped was what Lorna was going to say.
"It wasn't Christopher I wanted to marry. It's you," she was fully facing Nicky now, who still looked so shocked it made a reasonable excuse for her wild hair. "I mean, I'm not saying I want you to marry me. I mean, I do, but not right now. Whenever you want, all in good times, you know. If you even want it. If not, it's okay. I totally understand." Lorna was rambling now and Alex suddenly found herself smiling because finally, something good was happening right before her eyes.
"I made a mistake, and I'm so sorry. But I don't wanna spend the rest of my life being with someone I'm not even in-love with. I love you, Nicky. I'm sorry I let everything come to this before I finally realized it but I do. I love you so much that I can't live without you." But Nicky still hasn't said anything and Alex was ready to come knocking her back into her senses when Lorna spoke again. "Please say something."
But instead of saying something, Nicky looked at Alex as if asking her if it was real, if all of this was really happening right now. And Alex could only nod at her wearing the biggest smile she could have. It seemed to be the only thing Nicky was waiting for because before Alex could even realize what was happening, Nicky had closed the gap between her and Lorna, and she was kissing her like it was the last thing she'd ever do.
And it was also what Alex needed to remember what she was supposed to be doing right now. She was supposed to be with Piper, too. And so she was going to go home, and tell her again that they were going to be okay and actually mean it now. So she stood up and cleared her throat. "Uhm, as much as I'd like to watch a free porn show right now, I gotta get back to my girlfriend, too."
Nicky and Lorna pulled away, Nicky looking so damn happy and Lorna trying to hide her face on Nicky's shoulder. "Go do that, Vause."
"Yeah." Alex nodded at Nicky before looking back at Lorna. "Thank you, Lorna." With that, Lorna untangled herself from Nicky and strode towards Alex before wrapping her arms around her. Alex hugged her back, feeling genuinely happy at the sudden turn of events. "Bye, congratulations," she added jokingly as she went out of Nicky's house, filled with so much hope for the first time in a really long time.
-o-o-o-
Alex reached her house in only a short matter of time, her excitement to see Piper taking over her body. She knew she was only apart from her girlfriend for a few hours but with the way things seemed to be looking up right now, she just couldn't help but miss her a whole lot more. She slowly opened her door, not wanting to startle Piper in case she was still sleeping.
When Alex got inside, everything was uncharacteristically quiet. The whole place still looked the same way she remembered leaving it last night, except for a few pans left unused. She scanned the place looking for Piper but she didn't seem to be anywhere outside her room. "Pipes?" she called out, forgetting that she wasn't supposed to be making any noise.
She then proceeded towards her room and to her surprise it was also empty. There was an unsettling feeling starting to settle on Alex's stomach now at the lack of sight of her girlfriend. "Piper?" She called out again, hoping that Piper was just inside her bathroom, but still no response came. She looked around her room, looking for any sign that Piper must have left to buy something or to go to her own place for a while but Alex felt her knees weaken at the sight that caught her eyes.
Her drawer was open. And it wasn't just any other drawer. It was something that she used to deem so precious because it contained those things she now despised. She knew she left it closed but right now, it was open. She also knew that there were still heroin left in there, a lot of it actually, but just as Alex looked inside it, it was empty.
"Piper?!" Alex was running around now, going to the bathroom inside her room first only to find it Piper-less. "Piper!" Alex screamed, certain that her legs would've given up on her now, if only she didn't have the desperate need to know where Piper was. She bolted out of her room and went straight to the bathroom just outside and there she saw the most terrifying sight she's ever had to witness her entire life.
"No... no..." Alex's heart was beating so fast she was sure it was bruising right inside her chest. "No, Piper!" She ran towards Piper, who was lying lifelessly on the floor, the tourniquet still wrapped tightly around her arms, her mouth bubbling. She immediately reached for her wrist and looked for a sign of pulse and Alex almost threw up when she felt none.
"Piper, baby. No, you can't do this to me," Alex's tears were now shooting from her eyes she almost couldn't see. She slumped down on the floor, taking Piper's slack body in her arms before she shook her with so much force she thought she could break her bones.
And without even meaning to do it, the memory of Ashley lying lifeless in her arms came flashing right in front of Alex's eyes and it was the last straw for her that she knew she was just about to lose her sanity, because no, it couldn't be happening again. "Piper, wake the fuck up!" She tried to lightly slap Piper's face, but her hands were shaking too much that all she could accomplish was bring her hand to her girlfriend's face.
She pulled Piper up bring her closer to her as she wrapped her arms tightly around her. "Please wake up. Please," she was losing her voice, and probably even her own will to live, too. "You can't leave me. You promised me you're never, ever going to leave me. Piper..." Alex brought her head down downwards and pressed it against Piper's forehead, her shoulders wracking as she sobbed.
"Piper, don't you fucking leave me!"
But Alex's voice had lost all of its conviction because with the sight in front of her right now, it seemed just like Piper already had.
-o-o-o-
SHOUTOUTS:
elliellie1, Yeah, I'm glad you liked the previous chapter. And yey for Nicky and Lorna! Thank you for that review! =)
Budda1127, Oh my God that is so sweet of you to say! I'm smiling like an idiot right now, I just can't believe you'd think that about my writing and this story. Thank you so much! You are an angel. =) I'm glad you think that about how I write the withdrawal symptoms, I'm kind of not sure if that's really how it goes but I try and hopefully I am close enough to its accuracy. Haha. Again, thank you very much for that review. It's gonna keep me going for days! You are wonderful! Hugs and kisses, my friend! =)
rach5878, Hahaha! Okay, my friend. You got yourself a deal! =) Thank you for your review and hey, no need to apologize. No reviews are ever lame to me. =)
ejm137, Thank you for that reassurance, I just thought that I could've done it better but thank God you think it's good enough. I appreciate the words of encouragement. =) Although I have to say this: sorry for how this chapter turned out. =(
ManveerlovesVauseman, Thank you so much for such a detailed and well-thought review! I'm glad that you seem to approve of what I'm doing with this story so far. Haha. Yey for happy Nicky and Lorna, but nay for Vauseman, right? Sorry! =( But anyway, thank you again!
RJVause, I'm glad I can surprise you in my own little way. Hopefully, I was able to do the same for this chapter. Although I know it's not the kind of surprise you'd wanna see. Haha! I hope you like how things turned out for Nicky and Lorna even though I never really showed it in detail. Thank you for your review, it's amazing! Here's the new update, enjoy!
TinyGuitarist, I had to put in some "fluffy" stuff or else people are probably gonna start leaving me death threats. Haha! Just kidding. Thank you for that cute review! =)
amciotola1, It makes me so happy when someone who isn't really that much into reviewing takes a few minutes of his/her day to leave one for my story, so thank you very much! You don't know how much your review just made my day. =) Hope you enjoyed this latest chapter. =)
schillingarmy, Thank you so much! I'm glad you think so, it means a lot. =) Yeah, superwoman Vause, people. Haha. Sorry that this chapter took longer for me to post than usual. Have a great day as well!
Marauder-Lu, I'm so glad you think that it was worth it, that was so nice of you. =) Thank you for such wonderful review and I hope you still find this chapter just as "worth it" haha.
WB79, Long way to go for Vauseman, indeed. Hope you still have enough gasoline in the tank to join them in this ride. And yey for Nicky and Lorna! =)
izzielg, Oh no, don't apologize. I appreciate every kind of review, positive or negative. Constructive criticisms are the reason I strive to become better at this, so thank you, really. I mean it. =) And thank you for your latest review as well. =))
SheriLovey, Them being normal may just be something that isn't really normal for Vauseman so you're probably gonna wait a little while for that. Haha! =)
Guest (glad Alex is trying to get her shit together), Yes, she has to finally do it or everything will just be downhill for Vauseman and I don't want that. Haha. Thank you for the review! =)
FFChik, Thank you for another reassurance, I appreciate it. =) As always, your review amazes me I feel so unworthy haha. And yes, as you may have noticed the next chapters are gonna be one heck of a battle indeed.
jo michael, Hi, my friend, I am so glad you're back! And you don't have to apologize for the late reply as I totally understand. Thank you very much for that wonderful review! I missed you, too! Haha. And I'm so touched that you consider me as your "favourite" author in here, that really means a lot to me. How was Greece? I'm doing okay, probably not as much as you coz I'm still stuck in my country. I love it here, though. Haha. Your reviews always make me smile, too. Hope you're doing great, thank you! =)
Guest (love the way I wrote Alex), I'm glad that you loved it! Somebody has to be the strong one for both of them, right? Things may have just gone downhill again and I'm so sorry for that. Thank you for the review!
sara lance, Thank you very much for another review! And well, you found out what happened in this chapter. Please don't try to hunt me down and kick my ass. Haha!
Lily, Thank you so much that means a lot =)
huggerguest, I'm really happy to know that... and to know that you liked the flashback scene. =) And the darkest times may have just restarted again. Haha!