1.17

The crowd parted around me as I walked. The street was packed enough that I let Michael fade away, leaving only Allfather trailing behind me. Everyone was looking at me. Some still cheered or applauded. Many raised their fists as I passed. A hundred voices spoke at once; running over each other into a wall of solid sound.

"Valkyrie!"

"That was kickass!"

"Heil!"

"Freak!"

"Empire!"

"Show the Protectorate who's boss!"

"What are your powers?"

"Kill that nigger bitch!"

I stopped. The speaker was a burly man with a shaved head. He had a little boy cradled in one arm. He nodded respectfully to me when I looked at him.

"It's about time someone got rid of that nigger. You're doing God's work, Valkyrie." He nudged the boy. "Wave to Valkyrie, Alden."

Alden, who was probably no older than two, waved dutifully.

What was I supposed to do here?

I stared at him for a long moment. Finally, Allfather put a hand on my shoulder.

"She's a little shy." He shook hands with the man. "Good to see there're still men who know the value of fatherhood in the Empire."

The man looked like he'd just been crowned King of the World.

"Th-thank you, uh- sir."

"Can we go?" I said to Allfather.

"Valkyrie says thank you. I'm Allfather by the way." Allfather said. He took my arm and we continued on through the crowd.

I knew intellectually that I was involving myself with people like that, but to actually meet one was… Did I really want this? Was I that selfish? Even without joining the Empire, I was still going to be allying myself with Neo-Nazis. Fucking Nazis. You didn't get any more evil than that.

"We can go now." Allfather said quietly. He'd shaken hands with half the people we'd passed, and seemed to be treating the whole thing like a party.

I returned Allfather and called Runechild. She winced at the rush of sound that she appeared in.

"Cmon, let's get outta here before one of these skinheads whacks me with a brick."

She grabbed my arm and we moved. In an instant, we stood atop the building I'd been on earlier. The cheering fell to a dull roar below us. Runechild picked up her runecard and pocketed it.

"Back to the hideout?" She asked.

"Yes. …no." I hesitated. What was I feeling? Giving the speech had been exciting. Leading the crowd; having everyone hanging off my every word was... just wow. I'd spent two years being basically ignored by everyone except to get bullied. After that- the attention I'd gotten when I spoke was intoxicating.

But on the other hand, actually meeting the people in the crowd had killed my mood. What had Allfather said about our contract? Something about it being a 'deal with the devil.' I thought I knew how he felt in that moment. I was selling my morals out of greed.

"Let's go back." I said. I'd just end up ruminating if we went back to the warehouse, but I also didn't want to be around people for a while.

"Alrighty." Runechild adjusted her mask, looking uncomfortable. "Hey… Taylor? Valkyrie. You uh… I know you said you're not Empire, but that rally was sorta… Empire-ish."

"I know." I said. "It's complicated."

"Didn't you say you wanted to be a hero?" She started to wrap herself in her cloak, but then caught herself. "I just- I've seen people get caught up in bad stuff before."

"Your sister?" I guessed.

"Yeah. She joined the ABB after we came to America. I knew she was running with gangsters, but I didn't think she'd ever…" Runechild trailed off. "Forget it."

PHQ's windows caught the afternoon sun like giant mirrors, and Runechild's shadow was long across the roof. Mine was more insubstantial; only the shadow of my clothing.

"Thanks for looking out for me, Noriko." I said. "You heard what Allfather said before the rally, right?"

She nodded, and I continued. "It's all… shit, it's complicated. I don't know how many ghosts I need to come back, and I'm worried about Dad, and I'm furious at Emma and Sophia, and it's… it's overwhelming. Allfather has my back for now, but he won't be around forever, and if I could get some support from Krieg, it'd make everything a lot easier."

I left out that I had no idea what I was doing. That I was scared shitless over Dad, and I had to keep reassuring myself that he'd wake up someday. How I'd latched on to Allfather because I needed help badly, and he was there. That coming back to life seemed more and more like a pipe dream, because nothing ever went right for me.

"What about the Protectorate?" Runechild said. "They're heroes, but you rallied against them."

"They let Sophia run free. I knew her for two years, and if they didn't catch on to what a psycho she was, then they just didn't care. I- how would you feel if no one ever avenged your death, Noriko? Your killer just went on with their life and nobody cared about you enough to take an interest. That's how I feel about what the Protectorate did."

Runechild looked suddenly furious. "You know who killed me, Taylor? My sister. And I didn't wish for revenge. I wished to find her. Because I want to see that Setsuna got help and d-didn't stay b-bad."

She sniffled, and before I could say anything, she was in tears. I cringed; her moods were like a flip of a switch.

"B-because real heroes d-don't take revenge! They help people!"

Nothing like a tearful twelve-year old to make you feel like a giant asshole.

"I'm sorry, Noriko." I looked down at my hands. The fabric across my palm was stained like a starburst of blood. "I just can't. I can't let this go. They took everything from me, and I've got a chance to finally get even. I'm going to be a hero, but this comes first. I've got to finish this."

She pulled her hood down low so I couldn't see her face, but she was still crying.

"Did your sister really...?"

Runechild nodded jerkily.

I didn't even think about it; I just acted. Our cloaks brushed together as I knelt and pulled her into a hug. Runechild went stiff, but then folded against me, shaking with grief.

All I could think about while I held her was what she'd said. How could she just forgive like that? How did she just let it go? And beyond that- what kind of monster would hurt someone like Runechild? She was a geeky little wannabe hero; not a threat to anyone or anything. And her sister, of all people, had still…

A fucking twelve-year old.

A child.

Runechild might be ready to forgive her killer, but I wasn't. And when we ran into this sister of hers, I was going to have something to say about it.

By the time she finished, the sun was edging the horizon and the sky was the variegated blend of twilight. The street below was mostly deserted now. A few straggling protestors hung around, but the mob from before was gone. A chilly wind picked up and we both shivered. Funny how instinct worked. Neither of us really felt the cold, but we shivered anyway.

Runechild spoke into my chest, her voice muffled.

"Thanks."

"It's okay."

"You remind me of her." Runechild said. "When she was still nice." She hugged me a little tighter and then broke away.

"Let's go home." I said.

Runechild raised an eyebrow at me.

"I meant the warehouse. Not home."

She shrugged; still looking glum, and headed for Krieg.

Krieg was sitting down, reading something on his phone. He stood and stretched as we approached. Runechild situated herself a few feet away and started organizing her runecards. I called Michael so Krieg and I could talk.

"All done?" Krieg said. "Thought we might end up camping out up here."

"We're ready." I said. "Was there anything else before we go?"

Krieg smiled broadly. "Taylor, I have to say that watching you out there today was worth the show. I don't think Iron Rain could have done better herself."

"Thanks?"

"I should be the one thanking you. Fate smiled on me the day Allfather met you." Krieg put his phone away. "Get some rest at the warehouse. You're going to need your strength tomorrow."

"More rally stuff?"

"Better." Krieg's smile turned hard. "You're meeting Kaiser to issue Allfather's challenge. You and Richard are going to gatecrash."

Runechild teleported us back to the warehouse. It was far enough away that we had to bounce across the city on a line of runecards she'd set up beforehand. I still found it a little disconcerting to teleport, but Krieg had it worse. When we made it back, he had to step aside and wait for the room to stop spinning. I guess it was like carsickness or getting sea sick- it affected everyone differently.

The warehouse was the same old grubby building, but I was glad to be back. Having a place to call home was reassuring. I still had my house, but I just didn't feel comfortable staying there when Dad was in the hospital. It felt too much like I was haunting the place.

Runechild trudged over to the couch and fell into it. I stayed with Krieg and called Allfather. He appeared, and I had the briefest flash of steel and leather before I found myself hoisted into the air. Allfather held me by the waist and spun me around like I was a little girl.

"You were amazing out there!" He bellowed.

The hug that followed was so tight that my feet didn't touch the ground.

"Yuw gweat toow, but toow tight." I said, my face mushed against his chest.

He got the message and set me down.

"Sorry, but there's nothing like a good speech to fire the blood!" Allfather was well past excited. His hands twitched like he wanted to give me another hug, but thought better of it.

"I… I couldn't have done it without you. It's just… I don't know, Allfather." I looked down at my ragged costume. "It was exciting, but I feel like… I feel like I sold my soul or something."

Allfather went still. "Ah." He looked like he was thinking. Krieg tapped his watch at Allfather, but I waited for him to speak.

Finally, Allfather said, "It's a big decision, Taylor. I know that you've got some reservations, but this is an excellent opportunity to make some very powerful connections. What's best right now might just be to sleep on it."

Krieg cleared his throat. "We're speaking about Miss Hebert joining the Empire, correct?"

Oh right. Krieg couldn't hear me. It had to be awkward for him to watch Allfather have a conversation that he could only hear the half of. Once more, I called Michael to speak.

"Yeah." I said. "Allfather thought I should be more like a partner."

"An ally," Allfather said. "Something that would let her align with the Empire, without joining."

Krieg hmm-ed. "I see. I understand that you're not exactly keen on joining. While it may not be in my best interests to suggest it, have you considered operating as an independent? Are you familiar with Faultline's Crew? They're parahuman mercenaries. You could offer your services to other groups in the same way that you will to the Empire."

I stared at him. "You're agreeing with Allfather even though it means I won't join?"

"If you're as reluctant as I think you are, it wouldn't work out in the long run. Your heart wouldn't be in it and you'd end up miserable. I'd rather have a happy ally than an unhappy minion." Krieg said matter-of-factly. "Allfather's suggestion is a sound alternative. As long as you're still willing to render your services to us, I'm fine with supplying you with what you need."

"No one's going to hire a cape who hangs out with the Empire." I said.

"I think you might be mistaken, Miss Hebert." Krieg said. "You've got a one-of-a-kind skill to offer. You're going to be pleasantly surprised, I think, to see just who wants your help."

"Exactly." Allfather said. "Look at the girl in the hospital, Panacea. She was scared to death of us, and she was still tempted when she heard what you can do. And what did you just announce at the rally?"

I tried hard to think of what I'd said. A lot of stuff. Most of it related to killing Sophia.

"Uhh…"

"You told them that your power was to speak with the dead." Allfather said. "That's free advertising. People will come to you, so don't burn your bridge with the Empire, but also don't be afraid to build new ones."

"Right… I'll think about it." I said noncommittally.

Probably for the rest of the day, and all night.

We said our goodbyes and Krieg headed for the door. Allfather hung back with me.

"I'm proud of you. It took a lot of bravery to stand up in front of that crowd." He put a hand on my shoulder. "You're worth more than you know, Taylor."

"Thanks. I'm just…" I trailed off. Frustration played openly across my face.

"I know you're worried about this, and what it means for you." He leaned in and whispered in my ear. "Ask yourself what revenge is worth, and I think you'll have your answer."

And with that, he was gone. I stayed standing there after he left, staring blankly at the door.

Krieg's suggestion kept playing through my mind, blending with Allfather's words. Was it really that easy? Rather than selling out to the Empire, I could sell my skills as an independent. It sounded too good to be true. I'd be able to score ghosts from all different factions, without getting too close to anyone.

But at the heart of the matter was still the Empire. Not just them though. There were all kinds of villains out there who might want to work with me. And who knew what my ghosts might wish for. Allfather asked me if it was worth it. Was it worth compromising my morals to come back? I'd be letting greed drive my actions; my desire for ghosts and life overpowering any aspirations to heroism I might have.

I'd led a hate rally today just to spite the Protectorate. And that was just petty revenge. I wanted to live even more than I wanted revenge. I wanted to see Dad even more than that. If I was willing to go that far for revenge, how far would I go for Dad? Would I be able to look him in the eye when this was over?

Would I be able to call myself a hero? Could I, when I was balancing the scales between helping ghosts find peace, but at the same time allying myself with the worst of humanity?

Fuck. Thinking about it gave me a headache and made me feel like an awful person.

With that, I headed for the couch.

Runechild didn't move as I sat down.

"Did you hear all that?" I asked.

She answered without enthusiasm, her eyes still fixed on the tv. "You're not joining."

"Yeah. We're going to be allied though."

"Seems that way." She said.

"Are you..." I stopped myself. That was a stupid question. Of course she wasn't okay. "Tomorrow morning, do you want to go look for your sister? Before we do anything with Allfather?"

Runechild sat up a little. With two fingers, she pulled her domino mask off. A set of tired brown eyes looked back at me. There was something unpleasantly… adult in her gaze. As though she'd seen too much.

"If you think it's the right time, Taylor."

"It's your contract."

"I don't know." She rubbed the bridge of her nose; looking more haggard than I'd ever seen her. "It's… I'm scared. I want to know what happened to Setsuna, but I'm also afraid of what I might find."

"You're worried about her being dead?" She winced. We both knew there was a silent 'like you?' on the end of that question.

"Yes and no. I don't think anything could ever kill her. I mean, she lived through Leviathan when I was just a kid. But… I mean, anyone can die."

This time, I was the one who flinched. Dad might die. Might be dead at this very moment.

"Sorry." Runechild said quietly. "No it's… what I'm worried about is if she's not dead. Worried about what she might be like."

"You said she went bad earlier."

Runechild nodded. "I didn't ever- you don't expect someone you know to… I mean, she raised me Taylor! She wasn't just my big sister, she was my whole family. I thought… when it came down to it, we'd always have each other, and we'd n-never b-be apart."

She was getting teary by the end of it.

Should I hug her again? What did she need right now?

"I… just forget it, Taylor. It's my problem, not yours." She said heavily. "You've got enough going on without me being a burden."

Something about that sounded familiar. What did it… Oh.

"You're not." I said.

Runechild looked at me. "What?"

"You're not a burden. Look, I know how you feel."

"No you-"

I cut her off. "I do. Because I felt the same way about my Dad. I never told him anything because I didn't want to burden him. And that was wrong, Noriko. I didn't realize it until I couldn't see him anymore, but he needed to know. Maybe-"

The realization hit me like a ton of bricks.

"Maybe if I'd told him more, he wouldn't have taken it so hard when I died."

Runechild's eyes were wide; her fingers balled up in her cape.

She looked how I felt. Like she'd just gotten sucker-punched.

"I shouldn't… I shouldn't talk down to you, Noriko, because I'm just as fucked up."

She stared at me for a long moment. And then, unexpectedly, she began to giggle.

"You just said I'm effed-up. You're really not good at cheering people up, are you?"

My face heated. "Sorry. That's not what I meant."

"It's true though. We're both weirdos."

"You're not. And you're not a burden, and you shouldn't feel bad for whatever happened to Setsuna or Detective Wickman."

"Like you shouldn't feel bad for your dad?" She replied.

"That's different."

"Bull." Runechild said. She paused, her expression growing somber again. "You really think she's okay?"

"I hope so." I said.

I sincerely did. I still wanted answers from Setsuna. What kind of sister raised Noriko and then turned around and murdered her?

"Tomorrow morning then?" Runechild said tentatively. "You still want to, right?"
"Got any ideas?"

"She was in the ABB. Are they still around?"

"Yeah."

"There we go then."

As if that settled it, she flopped over and returned her attention to the tv. She seemed much more at ease now. I couldn't say I felt the same.

The Empire and the ABB.

Tomorrow.

Wonders never ceased.

SPEAKSPEAKSPEAKSPEAKSPEAK

Elsewhere

Setsuna knocked twice before entering. No answer came, but she entered the apartment anyway.

"Lung!"

Her voice carried through the empty living room. Lung's apartment was the penthouse in one of the few nice complexes in the Docks. It took up the entire floor, and the living room alone dwarfed her puny apartment.

Lung's tastes tended toward Spartan. Beyond the basic ensemble of furniture- tables, chairs, tv, La-Z-Boy; the only decoration was a small framed photo of Lung and a tiny Asian woman. His mother, probably. Setsuna tried not to look at the photo. Too many unpleasant things came to mind. The fact that she couldn't remember her parents' faces was one.

She paused inside the door to remove her shoes. Lung might not mind, but it was a custom she liked. It was one thing to mess up her own place, messing up someone else's was just rude.

She took a single step and then moved to the bedroom door. Her iterations filled the intervening space. Some looked around, others screamed silently; their lips mouthing Noriko's name. She only stared ahead, her face impassive. The noises emanating from the bedroom told her where she needed to go.

Setsuna reached for the door, hesitated, and then knocked.

A loud, hoarse voice yelled at her through the door. "Bakuda! What did I tell you about disturbing me?!"

"Lung, it's me." She called.

"Fuck off, Kaze!" Lung barked.

"I need my sword."

There was silence for a moment, and then heavy footsteps rattled the door in its frame. It swung open and Lung filled the space. He was completely naked. Behind him, Setsuna could see a woman hastily covering herself with bed sheets.

"What?" Lung said. He managed to contain a lifetime of threats into the word.

"I need my sword." She repeated.

Lung raised his eyebrows. He made no effort to conceal himself as he stood there. Setsuna looked determinedly at the ceiling. She'd seen Lung naked many times, but it was impolite to look this time.

"You interrupted me for your fucking sword?"

"I have business to take care of and I need my sword."

Lung sniffed the air. "Are you… sober?"

"For the moment."

He stepped closer, blocking her view of anything else. He was so tall that her face was level with his sternum. She kept her eyes fixed straight ahead, tracing the sinuous lines of his tattoos. His muscles did interesting things to the dragons.

"Explain." He ordered.

"Valkyrie was on tv, and she has Noriko."

Lung blinked, squinting his red eyes at her. "Your sister? Kaze, she died years ago."

Guilt flared in her belly. Her hand twitched convulsively; the muscles still remembering that night.

"I killed her years ago." She said firmly.

"Lung, come back to bed." The woman in bed whined. Both of them turned to look at her. Setsuna could hardly believe her. What kind of idiot interrupted Lung? How dare she interrupt her?

One step forward would be all it took. She could move and drive her fingers through the woman's eyes. Or even better- enough iterations could peel back her skin and go for the heart. She could bathe in her blood, celebrate with whiskey, and then find Noriko. Lung wouldn't mind. He would understand- he would allow it if she just-

Too much.

Setsuna flickered in place. Her iterations moved inside her; a hundred bodies occupying the same spot. She took a deep breath and forced all her emotions into them. Hate and rage and and despair poured across their connection like blood in spreading into water. She colored them with her feelings. Only guilt remained; the only thing she would allow to remain.

The iterations shuddered as she filled them. Some burst into silent tears, others shrieked with fury, stretching out their phantom hands toward Lung and the woman. Most only stared forward, their eyes as empty as her own.

After a moment, they vanished, taking her sentiment with them. Calm returned to her in easy waves, like frost creeping over grass.

"Shall I?" She said. Her voice was even. She wasn't amped up, but she wasn't going to say no to a chance if Lung would let her.

"No." Lung said. "I will discipline her after you leave."

He stomped over to the closet. He reached in, searching behind his rows of shirts for something. Setsuna wondered why Lung had a closet full of shirts. She'd never actually seen him wear one.

He spoke as he searched. "It's fortunate that you showed up anyway. We'll be making our attack against the Empire in a day or two. I was planning to call you so you could sober up beforehand."

She couldn't be anything but sober after seeing Noriko. Nothing quenched that level of guilt.

"Now- you will…" He withdrew his hand, holding a sword. Her sword. "You will take this sword, and you will wait. Lee is not here yet, and you need to meet the new girl. We're discussing our plans."

Impatient rage welled up in her. How could he delay her now? Not now- not when she was so close to the end.

Her hands knew the motions. A step and a move, and she could do to Lung what she'd planned to do to the girl.

"Lung, I need to-"

"You will wait." He said. His tone brooked no argument.

She stared at him for a long moment, took a deep breath, and then nodded.

"I will wait."

She didn't wait for him to approach. She moved forward, her hands mixing with her iterations as they reached as one for the sword. Lung let her take it, chuckling under his breath at her naked desire.

Setsuna touched every inch of it, loving the lacquered smoothness of the sheath under her fingers. They traced up, past the tsuba to the handle. The wrapping was still worn to the shape of her hand. She knew it as intimately as she knew her own body. Every draw- every time her iterations had wielded it was burned into her mind. A hundred million repetitions in one.

"I've missed you." She whispered.
"Good. Now get out." Lung said. He shoved her out the door and slammed it behind her.

Setsuna barely noticed. Now that she was alone…

She drew only an inch of the blade. Her blurry reflection looked back at her from amid spots of rust. She needed to clean it. Only… what was the point? What did it matter if her blade was a little rusty? She only had one more kill to make, and then things could finally be right.

There was a certain sense of poetry in going into her final battle with a rusted blade. A ruined blade for a ruined woman. She allowed herself a small smile at that.

Lung had told her to wait.

But Noriko was still out there.

Noriko, who should have been 17 this year.

Noriko, whom she'd failed.

Noriko, who she still saw screaming in her dreams.

Noriko, her sister.

Noriko.

It took only a second to make her choice. She opened Lung's liquor cabinet, grabbed the priciest looking bottle, and then moved to the window. Her iterations stood quietly behind her, each clutching their sword to their chests.

The night air whipped her hair back as she opened the window. She leaned out, savoring the moment. It occurred to her that she felt oddly light. She felt good for once. It was… acceptance. The freedom of resignation.

The end was coming.

With a thought, she was gone into the night, carrying with her a sword, a bottle, and a new, wonderful feeling.

She allowed herself to feel it.

SPEAKSPEAKSPEAKSPEAKSPEAK

This chapter got rewritten after its original posting. The second half originally had Taylor and Runechild running out to fight crime and running into an indie cape called Sledgehammer. It was messy and confusing and didn't fit, so it got replaced with Black Kaze's bit.

This is noticeable for being the chapter that was so bad it made me start using a beta.

More, very noticeable, very cringeworthy now, issues with Taylor's character and motivation. I really hate how lazy I was about writing her, and how I never figured out her personality until the story was over.