Here ya go…hope you enjoy.
Chapter 34- Ambush
"Hey Frankie…can I barrow your sleeping bag?" Jane called out from the hallway outside of Frankie's room.
"Yeah…it's in my closet." Frankie called back.
"Hey…whatcha doin'?" Jane asked from the open doorway.
"Nothin'…" He said from his reclined spot on his bed. His legs were stretched out and his head was propped up on some pillows behind him. His appearance was the epitome of a sulky teenager and he did little to hide it.
"I'd say you were doin' some heavy thinking." Jane ventured to guess as she stepped into his room. She didn't say anything as she moved to his desk and dropped down in his chair without turning it around. A long sigh escaped as she placed her elbows on the back of the chair and watched him intently.
"What?" He asked grumpily without sitting up so he could see her better. He crossed his arms over his chest as he stared up at the ceiling, not really acknowledging her presence.
"Come on Frankie…talk to me." Jane leaned against the back of the chair, placing her chin in the palm of one of her hands. "I know something's wrong…you haven't been yourself for the past week."
"Whatever…" He growled without looking at her.
"Hey…you wanna be an asshole, then far be it from me to interfere." She pushed up off of the chair to leave but before she could get far Frankie spoke again.
"Wait…" He sat up and crossed his legs making room for Jane on his bed. Patting the empty space, he silently asked her to sit.
With a firm nod of her head, Jane sat down next to him but didn't say anything for a moment. She studied him intently and realized she hadn't noticed how drawn out and tired he looked. His normally dark eyes seemed even darker with the shadow of sadness and the smudges under them proved what she already suspected, that he wasn't sleeping much.
"Look, you know you can talk to me…please tell me what's going on." Jane reached out to push his unruly dark hair away from his face, something she had seen her mother do hundreds of times before. She couldn't help but think that maybe it had offered him some sort of comfort when he gave her a crooked smile.
Leaning back against the wall where his pillows were propped, he let out a long, slow sigh before looking at Jane. He crossed his arms again but this time it was an attempt at self-preservation or perhaps it was just an effort to comfort himself. The lump that had suddenly formed in his throat made it difficult for him to speak causing him to cough before he could find his voice.
"I think Cindy and I broke up…" His voice was flat as he struggled to get the words out. The fact that he was trying to remain as neutral as possible betrayed what he was really feeling.
"What happed? I thought you guys…" Jane didn't finish when she saw the look of surprise on his face at her admission. They hadn't talked about what had happened the night of their impromptu prom nor had they talked about what Maura had done.
"Figures she couldn't keep it from you…" Frankie grumbled as he displaced his anger towards Maura.
"Hey…that's not cool…Maura had nothing to do with whatever this is…" She waved her hands at him and his defensive posture.
With dark, sad eyes, he watched Jane carefully before nodding in agreement. "Sorry…" He mumbled as he looked away from her intense stare.
"Okay…let's start over. What happened?" She settled more comfortably on the bed as she crossed her legs like Frankie had.
"We had a really big fight that night." He leaned his head back against the wall behind him causing his dark hair to fall back into his face again. With a puff of air, he blew at the loose strands only resulting in having more hair fall into his eyes.
"Do you wanna elaborate?" She watched him carefully as he shifted nervously under her gaze.
He dropped his arms from their crossed position in front of his chest and placed the palms of his hands on his upper thighs. Rubbing his sweaty palms along the denim of his faded jeans, he shrugged his shoulders as if he wasn't sure what to say.
"Look…do you wanna talk to Pop about this?" Jane tried to think of a way to alleviate the stress she could see he was under.
"No…" He said shaking his head vigorously. "It's just kinda hard to talk about…"
"Take a deep breath and start at the beginning. Take your time, I've got nowhere I need to be…" She said even though it was a lie. She had made plans to meet up with Maura, but it would have to wait. Maura would understand.
"Well, I guess you already know that Maura got us a room…" He hesitated, giving her the chance to acknowledge. "And you can probably guess what we planned to do…" Again Jane nodded, trying to keep her face impassive. "We started to talk, ya know…about stuff…that's one of the things I love about being with her you know, she's just so easy to talk to." A flash of admiration light up his eyes, but quickly dimmed as he continued. "She told me that she wasn't a virgin Jane…" His eyes held the hint of a plea as he silently begged her to understand.
"And that bothers you?" Jane couldn't help but frown.
"Well…yeah…" He stammered as he tried to explain.
"I don't understand Frankie…she had a steady boyfriend for a year before you…and she's almost a year older than you are." She pulled her arms closer to her chest and tilted her head in a questioning way.
"I just thought…" The words got caught in his throat causing him to close his mouth as he realized that Jane was regarding him with a mixture of disappointment and sadness.
"You just thought that Cindy should have saved herself for you? I don't get it Frankie, so she isn't a virgin…that doesn't change anything." Her shoulders tensed as anger filtered into her thoughts.
"Don't you see, it changes everything…I didn't want to make a fool of myself. What if I didn't do it right? She'd think I was an idiot." Frankie's shoulders slumped in defeat as he finally said what he was afraid to say.
"Ummm…" Jane nodded in understanding. Frankie had finally laid it all out and it was fear that came to surface. It was the same fear she had faced when her and Maura had started to move their relationship towards a physical one. "Look…I understand…but really Frankie…" She started to say.
"What Jane…really what? How could you understand?" He interrupted. "Yeah…I know about you and Casey…" His face turned red with the shame he was feeling. Her raised eyebrow prompted him to continue. "You know how guys talk…and I guess Casey isn't as honorable as everyone thinks…" He tried to explain.
"O-k-a-y…" She drew the word out slowly in an attempt to hide her surprise. "But you're wrong…"
That statement caused him to look at her, surprise written all over his face. "Explain…" He furrowed his brow as he tried to figure it out himself.
"Well…yes…Casey and I…" She didn't think she needed to explain something she had considered a mistake. "And not that it is any of your business but Maura had had relationships before me as well…" The hesitation in Jane's voice caused Frankie to lean forward. "Um…Maura had a relationship with another girl before me…" Her voice trailed off.
"Oh…" Frankie looked surprised and apologetic at the same time as he realized what she was saying. "I didn't realize…" He sighed.
"Yeah, well so as you can see, I do understand how you're feeling. I was really afraid of looking stupid too, especially when she already had experience with…" Her voice trailed off. She shrugged her shoulders in an almost casual way as she studied him carefully.
"What did you do about it?" He asked.
"I got over it…" She said matter-o-factly.
"It's not that easy Jane…" He started to say.
"Yes…it is Frankie." She challenged him.
Shaking his head, he looked away as if he couldn't bring himself to agree with her.
"Hey…look at me." She all but demanded.
"What?" He gave her a sideways glance, not really meeting her eyes.
"It is that easy…you just do it." Jane sighed. "Trust me, when the time comes…it will be the last thing you're thinking about."
"I just don't know…what if I'm not any good at it." His shoulders dropped in a defeated posture.
"Frankie…do you trust Cindy?" Jane asked.
"Of course…" He started to say but stopped when he realized what Jane was getting at. "So what you're saying is that I need to trust that she won't laugh at me if I don't know what I'm doing."
"What I'm saying is that you are offering her a wonderful gift and even though she can't offer you the same thing, every minute you spend loving her is a gift in itself." She reached out to put her hand on his shoulder, giving it a gentle squeeze. "Don't throw that away because you're insecure or scared…if you talk to her about it I'm sure you'll find she's insecure and scared too."
"So what you're saying is that I'm being an ass and I should apologize…" He gave her a sheepish grin.
"Yes, that's exactly what I'm saying." She let go of his shoulder before running her hand through her messy hair.
"Um…how did you know what to do Jane? How did you know what Maura would like?" His face turned bright red, the question out before he could take it back.
She studied him quietly for a moment, sensing that the question was an honest and sincere one. "Maura's a good teacher…" A small smile crept along her lips. She wasn't intending on elaborating but seeing the uncertainty still present in his eyes she decided she needed to. "Look, being with someone for the first time is like the first time. You both have to learn what works for each other…what you like, what she likes…it's kinda fun though…trying new things. But let me tell you something Frankie…being that close to someone both physically and emotionally can be pretty intense."
"Thanks for being honest with me Jane. I'm afraid Pop woulda just handed me a box of condoms as he backed out the door." He moved to the edge of the bed to stand up. "I really do think I love her though…it's been killing me not seeing her."
Jane regarded him cautiously as he moved to stand up. Her first instinct was to tell him he was too young to be in love, but she knew she would be lying. Her love for Maura burned so hot that she was sometimes afraid it would burn itself out if they weren't careful.
"Well, then I think you better start groveling…like on your knees." She stood next to him and gave him a firm pat on the back. "Flowers help too."
"Alright, alright…" He laughed as he headed towards the door, but stopped and turned back to face her. "Jane?"
"Frankie…?" She crossed her arms and raised an eyebrow in question.
"I'm really glad you're my sister…" His smile was genuine and heartfelt and Jane couldn't help but return it with one of her own.
"Yeah…well I guess I'm kinda glad you're my brother." She mumbled causing him to laugh again at her rare show of affection.
"Alright…enough of the mushy stuff…you might break something." He joked. "I'm gonna go call Cindy and hopefully she'll see me so we can talk."
"Good luck little brother…you're gonna need it." Her smirk was playful. "Remember…flowers…" She gave him a wink as she sauntered past him out the door.
"What makes you such a Casanova?" He ventured to asked, their easy, playful banter back in full swing.
""I've got skills…many, many skills…" She called out to him, not turning around to see he was laughing.
"Hey there…didn't you forget what you came here for in the first place?" He called back.
"What?" She stopped at the top of the staircase. "Oh shit…yeah the sleeping bag."
"It's in my closet, top shelf on the right." He said as he passed her.
"Yeah…thanks." She couldn't help but smile as her mind turned to the plans she was conjuring up which included sleeping bags, a starry sky above, and Maura in her arms.
"I missed seeing you today…" Maura whispered into the phone as she twirled a piece of hair around her finger.
"Yeah? Me too…" Jane sighed as she stretched her long legs out on her bed. "I woulda come over after talking to Frankie, but I let him borrow my truck so he go pick up Cindy so they could talk."
"You're a good sister…" Maura said as she imagined Jane laying out across her bed, legs stretched out in front of her.
"So I've been told." Jane smiled into the receiver. "So um…we all set for next week?"
"Yeah…I thought we'd meet at Carly and Ryan's and all go together." Maura settled back against her pillows.
""Kay…sounds good." Jane said quietly.
"I also thought maybe we could all stay the night on the boat…and then maybe Frankie and Cindy could meet us the next day so we could go out on the water for the afternoon." Maura suggested.
"I think that would be nice…" Jane mumbled in a distracted way.
"What's wrong Jane?" Maura could hear the hesitancy in the voice on the other end of the phone.
"Um, nothing…" Jane tried to hide her uncertainty.
"Um, nothing doesn't work with me anymore Jane. Come on…spill it." Maura sat up straighter as if it would help her understand better. Realization hit her when she heard Jane let out a long exhale of breath. "You're nervous about going to the ballet, aren't you…?" Even though it was phrased as a question, it was a firm statement.
"Maybe…I guess…" Jane stammered. "I just don't know what to expect, that's all…"
"I promise that I'll make it worth your while…" Maura's voice held a sultry, almost seductive purr to it.
"I know…I'm just not used to being around the type of people who go to the ballet…" Jane's mind conjured up the memory of Mrs. Fairfield and the attitude she had shown.
"You're thinking about the way Mrs. Fairfield treated you aren't you…" Maura guessed
Jane was quiet for a moment as she marveled at how connected she and Maura were. It was almost as if Maura could read her mind sometimes. "Maybe…" She couldn't hide the awe in her voice.
"I'm sorry she treated you the way she did that night, but I promise you from here on out, I'll always have your back…" Maura hesitated. "Did I use that phrase correctly?" Her voice filled with uncertainty.
"Yeah, you did." Jane couldn't help but smile again as she imagined that Maura was probably biting her lower lip in uncertainty. "And stop biting your lip…"
Quickly releasing her bottom lip, Maura couldn't help but laugh. She found it both freighting and exhilarating how well Jane knew her.
"Hey…" Jane paused as she held the phone away from her face when she heard someone coming up the stairs. "I think Frankie's back…I'm gonna go check and see if he's okay."
"Call me before you go to bed?" Maura asked.
"Of course…talk to ya later beautiful…" Jane said before hanging up the phone.
With a smile, Maura hung up thinking about how much she was looking forward to talking to Jane later and wishing her sweet dreams.
The evening had started out innocent enough…dinner…good company…a trip to the ballet, but in an instant, everything changed when Maura's hand settled just above Jane's knee. Jane was having a hard time concentrating on what was happening on stage as Maura's left hand crept up the inside of her thigh under the hem of her dress. Slowly, but surely, fingertips danced across heated skin, painting a trail of desire that had Jane gasping for air.
"Maura…what're you doing?" Jane's voice was a hoarse whisper.
"I'm watching the ballet Jane…" The innocence in Maura's voice was tinged with the edge of need so sharp Jane could almost feel it cutting into her overheated skin.
Jane looked down at her lap where her sweater lay neatly folded, conveniently concealing Maura's hand and let out a shuttering breath. She looked back out over the stage from their private balcony trying very hard to return her attention to the action below them but she found it next to impossible. The only thing that prevented her from losing herself to Maura's wandering hand was the presence of Carly and Ryan next to them. When Maura's hand stilled, Jane looked over at her as a wave of disappointment washed over her. She was grateful for the reprieve, but also frustrated that Maura had stopped.
It was Jane's soft groan of protest that brought an uncharacteristic smirk to Maura's lips. Her body buzzed with the power she felt as her fingers traced a light pattern against the inside of Jane's trembling thigh. Torturing Jane hadn't been Maura's intention when she rested her hand in Jane's lap, but she couldn't resist when her fingers brushed against the warm skin she found there. Now it was all she could think about as the ballet drifted off into the distance.
Jane was surprised by the smirk that played along full lips as she turned to study Maura's profile in the dim light. She could tell that even though Maura appeared to have a relaxed expression on her face, she was anything but relaxed. It was the uneven breathing that Jane noticed as the rise and fall of Maura's chest grew quicker and more sporadic. 'She's just as excited as I am…' Jane thought to herself as she shifted lightly in her seat. A trickle of fear, followed by excitement ran along her spin when Maura's fingers began to move higher still, seeking to explore their limits.
The flame that had started in the pit of her stomach raced through her like a fire out of control and Maura was afraid it would consume her if she continued to test the boundaries of being in a public place. She knew what she would find if she allowed her fingers to continue moving higher but she didn't know if she was prepared to actually feel it. It was almost enough to have Jane trembling with need, holding her just along the edge but not quite ready to let her go. As she stared straight ahead, eyes on the stage but not seeing the action taking place there, Maura's thoughts wandered to the silky softness of skin as her control faded. It wasn't until Carly and Ryan excused themselves to go to the restroom that Maura decided to see how much further she could push.
Velvety caresses continued to torture Jane as everything around her receded into the background, everything but Maura's touch. She barely noticed when Carly and Ryan left them alone on the balcony because she was so caught up in the feel of Maura. It was taking all of her concentration to not move her hips against the insistent touch of Maura's fingers as they grazed the soft cotton of her underwear.
"Oh, shit…don't stop…" Jane hissed under her breath when Maura's fingers retreated to trace a lazy pattern along the inside of a thigh.
Leaning back so she could whisper in Jane's ear, Maura never took her eyes off of the stage. "I'm going to touch you again Jane…can you promise to be quiet?"
The whispered words were hot against Jane's ear as she dropped her hands to clamp down on the arms of the chair she was sitting in. Unsure if she could keep herself from calling out Maura's name, but knowing she would surely die if she didn't feel Maura's intimate touch again, she forced herself to nod in response.
"Are you sure?" Maura whispered again.
With a vigorous nod of her head, Jane gripped the arms of the chair tighter as she waited for Maura to touch her where she needed it most. Her vision dimmed and the world around her faded when she felt Maura's fingers work higher before slipping past the thin, cotton barrier and past the point of no return.
"Ummmm…so ready…" Maura murmured under her breath, her voice barely a whisper as her fingers continued to explore, finding what she knew would be waiting for her.
At the first feeling of Maura's fingers teasing and stroking her, Jane almost tumbled over the edge but she forced herself to stand at the brink wanting to savor the moment for as long as she could. The roaring in her ears escalated to deafening levels as she gave herself over to the barrage of sensations that had gathered between her legs. What little rationality she had left in her brain reminded her that Carly and Ryan would be back and she realized she didn't have much time left. When the time came to finally let go, Jane reached down, grabbed Maura's hand, and pressed it against herself in an attempt to keep herself from moving. Maura's hand was the only thing standing between her and the sweet oblivion she craved. As Maura's fingers continued to move in an attempt to guide Jane home, it didn't take long for Jane's world to crash down around her in an explosion of light, shattering into a million pieces raining down on her like shooting stars.
When Maura felt Jane's body tremble and stiffen around her fingers, she finally turned her attention to the beautiful sight of Jane's climax. Jane's head was tilted back and her face flushed against the intensity of Maura's touch and the sight almost pushed Maura over the edge as well. "Breathe Jane…" The words were a whisper, laced with the plea for Jane to return to her. When she felt Jane's hand relax on hers, Maura withdrew her fingers. She smiled when she heard Jane take a few deep breaths, trying to even out her breathing. "Good girl…"
"I can't believe you did that…you're in so much trouble…" Jane sighed as she rolled her head to the side to look at Maura.
"Do you know how beautiful you are right now?" Maura leaned back and tilted her head so they were now eye to eye.
"Is this why you wanted me to wear a dress? Did you plan on ambushing me like this?" Jane had a tired, but pleased expression on her face as she studied Maura.
"Actually no…I just happen to think that you look sexy as 'fuck'. " Maura whispered the last word.
"Language Maura…" Jane lightly chastised even though the word caused her skin to tingle.
"I think we're past that…don't you?" Maura grinned as she brought her fingers to her mouth.
"You are in so much trouble…" Jane growled, closing her eyes against the sight that threatened to shatter her world once again.
"Oh…I'm counting on it." Maura whispered into Jane's ear before turning her attention back to the ballet.
A shiver ran through Jane's body as she attempted to slow down her breathing and racing heart. When she finally felt some semblance of control, Carly and Ryan returned, each with two drinks in hand.
"Here, thought you could use a cold drink." With a wink and a knowing smile, Ryan handed Jane a soda.
Jane knew she should have been embarrassed, but she felt way too good to let anything spoil her afterglow. With a smile and a wink of her own, she accepted the cold drink and set out to plan her revenge on Maura.
Ryan had sensed a change in the air around them as they sat in the small balcony, drawing her attention away from the ballet. It almost crackled from the sexual tension radiating off of Jane and Maura and Ryan felt the sudden need to escape. Taking Carly's hand, she gave it a gentle squeeze before leaning over to whisper in her ear. "I need to go to the bathroom…"
"Okay…" Carly tilted her head so she could hear Ryan better. She recognized a quiet urgency in the soft spoken words, almost like an unspoken plea.
"Come with me…" Ryan tugged Carly from her chair.
"What?" Carly gave a surprised yelp when she was pulled from where she was comfortably sitting. She watched as Ryan nervously spoke over Jane's head to tell Maura they were going to the bathroom. When Maura gave a vague acknowledgement, Carly felt herself being dragged away but not before she took one last look over her shoulder wondering why Jane looked so dazed.
"Hey…what's going on?" Carly stopped in the staircase forcing Ryan to do the same.
"I…um…think maybe they need some time alone." Ryan's face was turning a brilliant shade of pink as she pulled on Carly's hand again to get them moving down the stairs. When Carly didn't move, Ryan let out an exasperated sigh. "Carly…don't you remember a time when we couldn't keep our hands off of each other?" She watched as Carly furrowed her brow in thought before continuing. "Alright, let me try this again…do you remember that thing we did in the theater when we went to see 'Basic Instinct'?"
Carly's eyebrows shot up to her forehead when she realized what Ryan was saying. "Here…?" The dumbfound look on her face brought a small smile to Ryan's lips.
"I think so, or at least I'm pretty sure." Ryan gave Carly's hand a gentle tug, grateful that Carly started to move again.
"Thank God you got us out of there…I don't think I woulda been able to look them in the eye after that…" Carly rolled her eyes.
"Well, I don't think it would have happened if we had stayed, but the tension was so thick you could cut it with a knife." Ryan explained.
"What's wrong with me? Why am I so clueless?" Carly sighed.
"You're not clueless…complacent maybe, but not clueless." Ryan shrugged her shoulders as they stopped in front of the bathroom door.
"Complacent…" Carly let the word roll off of her tongue as if it were foreign to her. "You think I'm complacent?"
"Maybe I should have said content." Ryan backtracked when she saw a flash of anger flicker in Carly's sky blue eyes.
"Are you trying to tell me that you think…" Carly pushed Ryan into the bathroom backing her up until she was leaning against the sink. "I don't remember the fearless need to touch and be touched by you?" She pressed into Ryan placing her hands on either side of her body on the sink Ryan was leaning against. "Do you think I can't feel the heat that lingers under your skin just waiting to burn me at the first touch?"
"Carly…" Ryan placed her hands on Carly's chest, stopping her from moving any closer. She had watched as Carly's light blue eyes darken to the same blue she had seen dancing within the flame of a candle. It was like watching ice melt into liquid fire and it caused her knees to go weak.
"Oh no you don't…" Carly moved her hands from the sink to the backs of Ryan's legs, lifting her up onto the sink. Pushing herself between Ryan's legs, she leaned in to press her lips against Ryan's ear. "If this is what you need from me to prove that I haven't become complacent, then I'll be happy to oblige…" She whispered as her hands moved up and under Ryan's dress. "Have I told you how much I love seeing you in this dress?" Carly pulled back to look Ryan in the eyes.
"Yes…I think so…" Ryan's voice was breathless as she tried to gather some semblance of control over what was happening.
"I wish you'd wear them more often…" Carly pressed her lips against the hollow of Ryan's throat. "It makes it easier for me to do this…" She moved her hands higher, skimming her fingers along the insides of Ryan's thighs.
Feeling herself becoming lost in a haze of desire, Ryan grasped at the one last rational thought that floated through her mind. "What if someone comes in?"
"They won't…I locked the door." Carly growled against Ryan's throat as her lips moved up and over her jaw to hover over slightly parted lips. Whatever protests Ryan may have had died when Carly's lips finally captured hers.
"I wouldn't have pegged you for a scotch drinker…" Maura mused as she swirled the ruby, red liquid in her glass watching as it coated the sides before sliding back down. The faint aroma of oak and black pepper wafted up into the air tickling Maura's nose with its spicy undertones.
"Yeah…well I guess I come by it naturally." Ryan sighed as she stared at the amber liquid that surrounded several ice cubes as she too gave her glass a gentle swirl just as Maura had. "My dad drinks…um drank it. I guess it reminds of him…" She brought the glass up her lips to take a heathy swallow allowing it to slide down her throat with a slow burn.
"How long has it been?" Maura asked quietly.
"About two years…" Ryan pushed her unruly bangs away from her face when a gust of wind blew past them. "He was a traffic cop for the BPD…almost thirty years with the department and not once did he ever have the need to draw his gun…that is until he ran across some asshole driving on a suspended license who would rather kill then be caught." She explained even though Maura hadn't asked her to.
"I'm sorry Ryan…" Maura wanted to say more but she couldn't think of anything that would bring comfort.
Ryan's gaze fixed on her drink as she again swirled the glass watching the ice cubes and what was left of the amber liquid slosh around dangerously close to the rim. "I guess it's why I want to work for the DA…someone's gotta make sure people like that don't get out to ruin other people's lives." Dazed green eyes finally looked up to meet Maura's.
Maura studied the pensive look on Ryan's face in the dim candle light that flickered slightly as another breeze, softer this time, blew across the deck. The days had warmed nicely as spring marched towards summer, but the evenings still held a slight chill. When Ryan shivered, Maura wasn't sure if it was from sadness or from the cool air that announced how late in the evening it was.
"Here…" Maura said as she held the blanket she was under up so Ryan could join her and share its warmth. With a grateful smile, Ryan accepted the invitation being offered as she snuggled close to Maura, welcoming the body heat she found trapped under the blanket.
"Thanks." Ryan murmured finding comfort in the feeling of Maura pressed against her side, a familiar feeling of protectiveness.
It had been a quiet drive back to the boat and even quieter still as they all got ready for bed, that was until Carly and Jane had seen the gaming console. Maura had meant for it to be a surprise, one that she hadn't expected to take Jane away from her for the evening. The minute Jane had seen it, Maura knew she had no chance to compete especially since Carly had seemed just as excited. Having lost their girlfriends for the time being, Maura and Ryan grabbed a few drinks and slipped out onto the deck to enjoy what was left of the evening. However, when the subject had turned serious between them, Maura suddenly felt very tired.
As they sat there, neither willing nor wanting to break the still silence that spoke volumes without the need for words, Maura let out a heavy breath of air. It was enough to pull Ryan from her reverie and she felt the sudden need to make sure the subject was changed.
"What's on your mind?" Ryan took another sip of her drink, rejoicing in the slow numbness that was starting to spread through her body.
"I…um…want to apologize for what happened this evening." Maura cleared her throat nervously. "I've never lost control like that before." She shook her head and took another sip of her wine from a shaky hand. "I seem to be doing that a lot around Jane…um…losing control I mean."
"No need to apologize Maura…we've all been there before." Ryan continued to sip the amber liquid in her glass, taking comfort in the warming sensation that reached down into the pit of her stomach. She couldn't stifle the laugh when Maura turned to her, a surprised look on her face. "In fact, Carly reaffirmed my faith in her ability to remind me of that…" A sheepish grin graced her full lips and her green eyes danced with merriment at the memory.
Maura's look of surprise was quickly replaced with a knowing smile. She was glad the look of sadness from earlier had passed quickly from Ryan's expressive green eyes. "I guess we're a pair aren't we…although I would have to question if I may have dreamt up what happed earlier, seeing how easily we lost them to a video game."
Ryan's body shook with laughter as she realized she had thought the same thing. Tilting her head back to look up at the dark sky, she let out a heavy sigh. "I think I've been neglecting my relationship with Carly…" Her voice trailed off.
"What do you mean?" Maura asked as she shifted closer to Ryan.
"I didn't see it until tonight and then I had the nerve to tell her I thought she was complacent…" Ryan shrugged her shoulders. She tilted her head so she could look at Maura. "But she sure showed me that she wasn't…um complacent that is..."
"What do you mean by 'complacent'?" Maura leaned her shoulder against Ryan's, giving her a place to lean.
"I guess I mean that we have become comfortable with each other…I think maybe I thought that the fire that burned between us wasn't as bright as before." Ryan laid her head against the shoulder that Maura had quietly offered. "But I was wrong, very wrong…it still burns just as bright as before, we just have to make sure to tend it…feed it so to speak…"
Ryan's voice slowly faded into the background as Maura closed her eyes and imagined a fire, burning bright in the night, its flame reaching up into the darkened sky. In her opinion it was the perfect analogy because that was the way she saw her and Jane. It was as if they burned white hot for each other and the darker it got, the brighter they burned. She couldn't ever imagine being complacent when Jane was near her. The need to feel her…touch her…taste her was so strong it threatened to consume Maura every minute of every day. The image of two flames, wrapping around each other, consuming one another as they became one was the last thing Maura remembered before falling asleep, her cheek pressed against the top of Ryan's head.
"Come on beautiful…" Jane whispered as she lifted Maura into her arms. "Time for bed sleepy head…"
"Um…Jane…?" Maura mumbled as she drifted away from her dream. She was still caught between sleep and wakefulness making it hard for her distinguish fact from fantasy.
"Yeah sweetheart…it's me…" Jane pressed her lips against the top of Maura's head which now rested against her shoulder.
"I can walk…" Maura's voice was thick with sleep as she tried to stand.
"Nah…I got you…" Jane held Maura tighter. "We've got a busy day ahead of us tomorrow…I guess we'll see you guys in the morning." She nodded at Carly and a now fully awake Ryan.
"Night…" Carly called to Jane's retreating back before turning her attention to Ryan who was now stretching in an effort to wake herself up. The short blonde hair was standing up in all directions and Carly couldn't help but grin at the sight of Ryan's bed head.
"Wanna stay out here with me and watch for shooting stars?" Ryan asked, a hopeful look on her face.
Carly smiled and nodded as she remembered the many nights they had spent together under the darkened sky counting shooting stars, making wishes and promises until the sun chased the moon away. "But only if you let me join you under that really warm looking blanket."
"Get under here…" Ryan chuckled as she pulled the blanket back to make room for Carly to sit next to her.
"I thought maybe you'd replaced me…" Carly joked as she settled next to Ryan.
The statement caused Ryan to stiffen and look at Carly with a fierce determination. "Never Carly, I hope you know that…" She placed a hand on either side of Carly's face and held her gaze.
When Carly's blue eyes met Ryan's love filled green, she couldn't stop herself from trembling under the weight of absolute certainty she saw there. "I know…" She pulled the smaller body against hers and whispered against Ryan's lips. "I know…"