A/N: Another extensive wait for an update, another inadequate excuse. If you're still with me, you're the stubborn type and I love you just the way you are. Stay gold, Pony Boy. This might be worth the wait, might not be. It's longer than usual, though, so that's something. I hope you will enjoy it. Thanks for hanging in there for the long haul with me. You're why I'm still here. This is un-beta'd, so please forgive my human errors.

EDIT: I've disabled anonymous reviews because I'm too stressed about real life to take the abuse from trolls about waiting so long between updates right now. It happened. I'm doing my best to update when I can and I'm sorry if that isn't enough for some of you. There's only so much I can do. I'm sorry to let one bad apple spoil it for those kind anons who would have left me lovely reviews. I'll miss you beautiful people.

SPECIAL THANKS to those who've popped into FanForum and asked when this will be updated. That was definitely a new way to get my attention. LOL.

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Gossip Girl's Chuck Bass and Blair Waldorf, I just want to prove they can stand by each other through anything.

Chapter 37

"Waiting for This"

Sitting in the salon in her pajamas, Blair should have known the few seconds of tranquility would be shattered by a visit from her pushy best friend. She loved the girl like a sister, but Serena couldn't seem to leave Blair to sort this out for herself. She had to have her manicured fingers in everything.

"Morning." Serena greeted her, standing in her uniform and coat like she'd been up for hours. In all reality she'd probably pulled the clothes out of the ball they'd been in the corner and not bothered to wash her hair. If she'd even slept in her own bed. Or taken a shower today.

Okay, so she hated her like a sister, too.

"Good morning, Miss Serena," Dorota greeted her quietly, guardedly watching Blair for a reaction to her best friend's arrival. But if her maid expected Blair to confide in the blonde, she had another thing coming. That would be like posting a picture of her pregnancy test results on a billboard in Times Square. Discretion was not going to be Serena's first reaction to this news. There would probably be screaming.

Blair released an exasperated sigh. "What are you doing here?"

"Anybody notice the weather today?" Serena asked, pointedly ignoring Blair's question.

"What?"

"Take a look outside, B," the blonde smiled widely and indicated the wide view out the open window. "My First Response would be that the sky is a Clear Blue Easy."

Oh. My. God. The girl had to be kidding.

"Dorota, you may be excused now," Blair instructed tersely, fixing her maid with an unamused glare. After Dorota wiped the tiny smirk from her face, she nodded uncomfortably and left the room.

There was absolutely nothing amusing about Serena's attempt at pregnancy test humor, especially right now, when there was currently one in Blair's trashcan condemning her. Tangible evidence that she'd been stupid enough to fall in love, to drop her guard, to lose her mind over a boy.

Damage control would have to start with her best friend. She had to lie enough to convince Serena to let the issue drop, otherwise her condition would become public knowledge before she could get to her father's. If that happened, there would be no making her own decision; the decision would be made for her.

It was when they were alone that Serena started in on the real reason for her visit. "Chuck still believes you and Nate slept together."

The words made the blood instantly freeze in Blair's veins. "What were you doing talking to Chuck about me?" She demanded, through clenched teeth. If the blonde said something to Chuck to make him suspect...

Serena's hands were on her hips. "I went to see him because I thought maybe he could talk some sense into you about taking that stupid test."

Blair's heart came to a dead stop, thinking of the repercussions and how Serena's pushy nature had ruined her plans, once again. "You had no right to do that," she scolded breathlessly. There was now no way to keep Chuck from knowing her true condition unless she lied directly to his face. The thought itself made Blair's heart ache.

"I was trying to help you, B," she insisted, the look on her face earnest. "I took a public bullet for you. Let another rumor about me run rampant. The whole school heard, even Dan!" Serena had emphasized the last two words, as if her precious boyfriend thinking she was knocked up was the foremost thing in Blair's mind. As if Blair could even care about what Serena had gone through when her supposed friend had messed up things so thoroughly for Blair herself. As if she hadn't just filled Chuck's head with the exact thoughts that she was horrified at Dan for thinking...

Blair's entire body was numb with rage. How dare Serena do this to her?

"I didn't ask for your help, S!" Blair's voice rose in pitch as she berated this girl, the one who'd promised her a week ago that no one would know when Blair had given into weakness and confided in her friend. "I asked you to keep your mouth shut! And you couldn't even do that!"

That was when Eleanor came in the room, alarm written on her face, and glanced from one girl to the other. "What's going on?"

"Ask Blair," Serena sneered. "Her version of the story's always better." She paused, her gaze burning Blair's face as if she expected the pregnant one to come clean to her control freak of a mother while she watched. When her thick head of hair finally got the clue, she huffed, "Fine." Then the blonde blurred as she stormed out the door.

It took seconds for Blair to realize that the blur was a result of her tears and she quickly reined them in to keep her mother from noticing how distraught she was.

The elder Waldorf woman placed a hand on Blair's shoulder, "Are you alright?"

It was time for those acting classes that Serena had forced her to take to start paying off. Forcing a smile Blair replied, "Never been better."

"Well, Serena has. What's wrong?"

"I don't know, Mom!" Blair huffed petulantly, "I can't be held responsible for her mood swings."

The wittiness in her choice of words didn't escape Blair. In fact, she almost giggled at the absurdity of it all. She herself was the one with that affliction, lately. Pregnant as she was. Ha.

Looking uneasy, Eleanor spoke slowly as she asked, "Were you arguing about the possibility that your condition may have returned?"

"No." Blair froze, not having anticipated a mention of that. "And it hasn't," she insisted. Bulimia was the least of her worries right now, which was odd as it was once the largest of her problems. Now the issue was that her midsection would be growing for a reason that had nothing to do with food and her vomiting had nothing to do with her self esteem.

Odd how all her challenges seemed to involve her waistline.

The other woman's tone was hushed as she persisted, "I heard you. The other day. In your bathroom with the water running."

Closing her eyes, Blair took a deep breath, trying to come up with something she could say that didn't include the words morning or sickness. She took the calculated risk of dropping her attempt to act unfazed, deciding to keep things as close to the truth without actually admitting to anything incriminating. "I'm very stressed," she sighed. "And with you and Serena down my throat I can hardly think straight, never mind keep food down."

Can't a bulimic have morning sickness in peace around here?

Her mother squinted at her, studying her as if there was a truth or lie light growing out of her forehead and it may be visible if she looked hard enough. "Maybe you just need to take a little break, huh? Visit your father? Lyon is beautiful this time of year."

Relieved that her gamble had paid off, and allowed her to lay a little ground work, Blair acquiesced as if it was her mother's idea and not her own. "Maybe this summer."

"Summer..." Eleanor trailed off, "sounds great." She gestured towards the plate of fruit in front of Blair. "Finish your breakfast."

Popping a grape in her mouth as her mother left the room, Blair sank into the divan in relief.

That was close.

Now that her mother wouldn't think twice about her fleeing to Daddy's for the summer, she just had to tell Chuck she couldn't possibly be pregnant. The fact that they weren't talking, and that Chuck could always read her like an open book when she tried to lie, were small obstacles to get over. Other than that, it was only her heart's nagging desire to tell him she was carrying his child that she would have to overcome in order to convince him that her summer trip had nothing to do with her expanding waistline.

Oh, and it'll destroy her when he believes her. So there's that.

Serena really needs to stop helping.

Chuck hadn't realized how oppressing it was thinking that Blair had slept with his best friend minutes after breaking up with him. Somehow the sun this morning seemed so much brighter than it had since that fateful night in December. It was like he could finally breathe again as he replayed choice parts of his conversation with Nate from the night before in his head.

It was stupid of me to think Blair had changed... No matter how well I behave, she's still an ice queen... So close to it at Cotillion... She just broke up with me... Said she'd fallen in love with someone else... Wouldn't tell me who...

Part of Chuck was truly resisting the urge to dance down the sidewalk towards school. This must be what all those annoying romantics refer to as 'walking on air.' It sure didn't feel like his feet were on solid ground right now. Hearing from another person that Blair had fallen in love with someone other than his best friend, and knowing that he was the only possible candidate, had him flying higher than the best product his dealer could ever sell him.

Nothing had ever come remotely close to this feeling.

Once he reached the gates of Constance-St. Jude's, Chuck leaned up against the wall and relaxed with a few tokes of his favorite herbal remedy. Just what the non-doctor ordered to bring his feet back to the ground. Something had to calm this fluttering in his stomach if he had any chance of seeing Blair today and acting semi-normal. There was no way he could face her right now without tackling her in the courtyard due to this new-found happiness bouncing around inside his gut.

It seemed impossible that they'd been apart for so long; to him it felt like yesterday that they'd been wrapped up in each other. The fact that Nate no long had any claim on her, that Chuck could walk right up to her and take her hand was forefront in his mind. Like the possibilities were endless now that she was free to resume their secret relationship.

Even the thought that she could be carrying that very heavy secret around couldn't bring him down. In his playboy days, it was his worst fear, but somehow he'd changed. Somehow Blair Waldorf had changed him. And if she loved him, then her pregnancy was something they would face together.

It was a handful of moments later when Blair whipped past him, causing him to drop the remainder of his stash to stub it out with his shoe. When he caught up with her as she was climbing the stairs, she spun at his light touch to her arm. Her nose was wrinkled up in annoyance at his interception, just a touch of nervousness in her eyes.

Now that he was this close to her, he couldn't find the words to tell her why he'd stopped her.

When he said nothing, she pulled her arm from his grip. "I've told you before, don't stop on my account." Her expression was well guarded, but it couldn't hide that bit of fear in her eyes. Her walls were up, which was completely understandable. He'd been treating her like a pariah ever since they'd broken up, so it was only natural that she mistrust him. His previous happy mood was quickly crashing back to the reality, though.

He'd momentarily forgotten how badly he'd hurt her. Remembering the pain he'd borne during their time apart, and how hard she'd tried to convince him of her innocence while he cut her every attempt down with cruel words, he wasn't looking forward to the hoops he would have to jump through. But he would do it. He would make amends somehow. Because she would have to trust him again.

How else was he going to get her back?

Then, of course, there was always their possible situation. He would have to test that little theory of Serena's."Oh, I have to," he drawled suggestively. "Secondhand smoke is bad for the uh-" Gingerly, he brushed the backs of his knuckles to her stomach, knowing that her reaction to that would mean more than any words out of her mouth. Her first response wouldn't be a lie if he caught her off guard.

When she jumped away like he'd shocked her, it was Chuck who felt like he'd been zapped by lightning.

Blair screeched at him. "You can't be touching me!"

"Why's that?" Chuck asked her, a little dazed. She looked around the empty courtyard, her eyes filled with fright. Like she was afraid someone would see what he'd just done and draw the correct conclusion...

That was enough testing for today, Chuck decided, gulping down the lump of fear in his own throat. He needed to work on getting Blair back before he processed what he was pretty sure he just learned. "Look," he caught her cautious eyes and ran a hand through his hair, "I know Nate is no longer an issue. I was his first call last night after the two of you split..." Sighing, he shrugged, "I guess I was just hoping we could talk."

She brought herself back down to the bottom of the staircase, but kept her distance from him. "Why I should talk to you is beyond me, but if he sees you touch me, sees us being anything that could be construed as more than friendly, he'll know, Chuck." She sighed, wringing her hands as an impromptu sort of shield between her stomach and him. "He'll hate you," she stressed, softly, and for once, he could believe her. For once, he could trust that it was truly her motive for keeping herself away from Chuck. He was no longer looking over his shoulder for Nate's shadow, trying to live up to every memory of Nate from Blair's past.

Chuck was finally free.

Very slowly, he lifted his hand and brushed the curls back from her cheek, giving her time to flinch away from his touch. When she didn't, he gave her a small smile. "And if that wasn't an issue? If losing Nate is a risk I'm willing to take?"

Blair gave her head a small shake and backed away from him, her face filled with sadness. "We're not together anymore, Chuck. What does it matter?"

"But we could be," he stressed, brushing his fingers down her arm, trying to soothe her. "I know now that I was wrong about Cotillion. And a lot has happened, but I was hoping we could..."

Her eyes widened in alarm as she stepped away from him and her voice raised in pitch with every word she spoke. "Pick up where we left off? Are you serious?"

This time he stepped as close as he could get and cupped her cheeks in his hands. "Yes, I am, Blair." He pressed his forehead to hers and closed his eyes. "I want to fix this. Make it right."

He felt her hands take his and lead them down from her face. When he opened his eyes, there were tears pooling in hers. "I can't hear this right now, Chuck." She released his hands. "I have to go."

Blair brushed past him to walk through the courtyard instead of up the stairs. She was probably changing course to stop at a bathroom to control her tears before going to class. It seemed they overcame her before she could escape, though, because she stopped suddenly, her hand against the brick wall.

He approached her slowly, placing a hand gently on her shaking shoulder. "Please, don't cry. Look, I was an ass." Her chest continued to tremble with sobs as he spoke, but he knew this was probably only part of his punishment for hurting her. "I'm so sorry I didn't believe you, Blair." Chuck combed his fingers through her hair, trying to console her while her tears tore him to shreds. "I don't have any right to say it, but I've missed you so much..."

Then she spun on him, with dangerous ire flashing in her eyes. "You don't get to speak to me like that, Chuck! You lost the right to miss me the first time you called me a liar to my face!" Swiping her hands across her eyes, she cleared some of the tears from her damp cheeks. "It broke my heart that you didn't believe me. To think back on how happy we were and realize that must have been a lie. The only other explanation was that it wasn't you that came back from Monaco." She bit her lip. "Because my Chuck would never do that to me."

Chuck leaned against the wall and crossed his arms over his chest, speaking softly. "You drove me to it, Blair." Her mouth opened to object, but he raised his hand and she stopped, letting him speak, just as he'd let her. "All I did was repay the pain you caused me in the same way you dealt it. I did my best to hurt you as much as possible because that's what it did to me to see you with him." The indignation in Blair's eyes began to soften into understanding. "I couldn't think straight; I destroyed my room, I fled the country to get away from it..." He shrugged, smirking halfheartedly. "The problem is, I had to come back eventually. Which meant we would eventually be standing here, having this conversation." Reaching out, he took her left hand in his his right. "Because we're inevitable, Waldorf."

She didn't pull her hand away, so he knew her resolve was floundering. "My Chuck still wouldn't have been capable of hurting me so badly." Blair sighed heavily, the hand not holding his was toying with the necklace she was wearing, and she was not meeting his eyes. "Not after I tried to explain myself, not after I denied sleeping with Nate." Her eyes slammed into his again, gleaming with unshed tears. "The Chuck that I loved would have believed me."

With his free hand, Chuck softly touched her shoulder, telling himself he wasn't doing so because he was afraid of falling down from the shock of what she'd just said.

"Loved?" He asked, his voice sounding hollow his own ears. "Past tense?"

A tear slipped down Blair's cheek and she looked incredibly terrified as she slowly shook her head in the negative. Inside of Chuck there was an enormous, white-hot explosion of joy.

She loves him! Blair loves him! Not only that, but she's admitting it to his face! She wants him to know how she feels, wants him for her own.

For the first time since the night they began, he swooped her up in his arms and kissed her without any thought to who would see, who would know. In this moment he just didn't care. All that mattered right now was that they were both exactly where they wanted to be: together. After several weeks of misunderstanding, there wasn't a doubt in his mind that they were finally on the same page.

Of course, this would be when he's torn from Blair and slammed against one of the rather sturdy brick walls in the school courtyard. The face of the girl he loves being replaced by that of her ex-boyfriend, Chuck's very own best friend. The best friend who's hands were now wrapped tightly around Chuck's neck.

It was just his luck that this would happen. That the happiest moment of Chuck's life was the moment Nate discovered their betrayal in the worst way possible.

Because Chuck Bass just wasn't destined for happy endings.

A/N: Yes, you're allowed to hate me a little bit. Please let me know you're enjoying the ride.