A/N: I know that many previous followers of the story are going to be confused as to why I've taken down the chapters and replaced them with a new story line. I apologize if this upsets you, but it's been literally years since I've updated this and when I read over what I had published, I just didn't care for it anymore. If you stay and continue reading, I will be grateful. If you don't like it and don't return, that's fine too. If you are completely new to the story and are liking it, please leave me reviews. Constructive criticism is always welcomed. Thank you!
Chapter 6
Marie felt as if she was back at Hogwarts with the lessons she and Draco had been receiving. Every day for the last two weeks she would wake up before dawn, have breakfast and take a seat at Severus's work bench in the study. Draco would arrive shortly after and their Occlumency training would begin. Most days they did not finish until past sundown. Severus was not joking when he said it would be grueling.
"Stop… I can't…" Marie was sweating profusely. "I'm gonna be sick…" she gripped the edge of the work table so hard her knuckles turned white. Her mind had been stretched to its limits for today. Draco was in the same state at the other end of the table in his own daze.
"We aren't finished." Severus stated coldly. "Give me one more hour." Marie shook her head quickly and he could hear her sniffling. "You need to keep going; Draco is much further ahead of you than I would like."
"I can't…" she started crying. "I'm not as strong as I thought."
"Yes you are. Keep going." Severus raised his wand once more. "This will benefit you just as much as it does him." Marie looked up at Severus and accepted that he wasn't going to be lenient. Without warning another flash of light erupted from his wand and she could feel the intruding presence of his magic in her mind. This one was particularly brutal; it was searching for something in particular. "Push me out! Fight me!"
Marie was screaming and writhing in her seat. The same memories began flying by her as if on a projection screen. Traveling backwards in time was the past few months until it turned to one, two, three years and so on. "These are so boring," Severus taunted dryly. "It's time to find something new." He pressed on further, hoping to elicit some self-defense from Marie.
He was intrigued by what he saw next. Severus was watching a young Marie; definitely pre-Hogwarts by quite a number of years. The little girl was standing in a small cemetery, clutching a dirty teddy bear and staring blankly at a casket being lowered into the earth. There weren't many people with her but the ones that were present seemed to look at Marie with disgust. Severus could hear their whispers.
'It's all her fault. Why is she even here? She's not crying so she must be proud of herself. She and that bitch of a mother ruined everything.'
Severus was attempting to piece together the scene before him but the present-day Marie had had enough of this intrusion into her past. She had gathered enough strength to not only rise and stand up but to counter the spell completely. "I said no more!" There was a small wave of energy that rippled through the room. Severus was forced out of her head and had even stumbled backward, catching himself on his own desk.
Draco gasped, smiled and looked at her with pride. "You did it!" he was still regaining his strength. Draco furrowed his brow when neither of them spoke but only stared at each other in silence. "What's wrong? Did she mess up or something?"
Severus cleared his throat. "No, that's enough for today." He turned towards Draco. "I don't believe there's much more I could teach you that your mother can't cover. Get something to eat and then head home." He then walked past the two of them and exited the room without another word.
Draco noticed that Marie hadn't moved a muscle since the lesson ended. She only continued to stare at the spot Severus had previously occupied. "What's the matter? Did he see you being a dork?" he joked.
Marie's throat was extremely dry. "Yeah…" was all she muttered, not really listening to the question. I've never told anyone about that.
Marie had not spoken to Severus since their Occlumency lesson abruptly ended a few days ago. What he saw wasn't necessarily bad but it was a time in her life that she had kept hidden from everyone. The recent developments about her family tree had only made her more resentful of the past. Draco had not been able to return to the house because of the holidays. In spite of his protests Narcissa thought best they spent them together as a family. What a fucked up family it is too, Marie had thought to herself.
Marie was hopeful that the holiday spirit might enter the house and that she and Severus could have a nice time for a change. All was quiet with the Order and they were taking a break from fighting to host a few parties. Severus turned his nose up at any and all invitations and insisted that Marie stay by his side.
"I don't understand why we couldn't go, if only for a little while." Marie said sadly. She was sitting on the floor in front of the Christmas tree, admiring the twinkling lights. Severus was nursing a glass of Firewhiskey in his armchair.
"They are being too careless and comfortable. Letting your guard down now will be something that the Dark Lord would expect." He breathed in deep the scent of the alcohol and pressed the glass to his lips. He was grateful yet suspicious that neither side seemed to need him much lately.
Marie sighed heavily in silent agreement. "Do you think Draco will be alright? I mean, you're a great teacher but he didn't have much time to learn. I'm sure he's going to be alone with them all this week."
"We can only hope for the best." He knew Draco wasn't entirely incapable but he didn't want to feed into Marie's anxiety.
She glanced up at the small window of the living room to see that the sun was setting. The wind had picked up and nighttime was sure to bring a heavier snowfall. Maybe Severus would let her out tomorrow to enjoy a Christmas Day snow angel or two.
"I'm going to the kitchen." Marie was tired of feeling down and decided to create her own happiness. Severus watched her leave the room and soon after he heard the crashing of pans on the tile floor followed by her shouting, "I'm okay!" He shook his head and his eyes drifted back across the living room and they rested on the small gift sitting under the tree.
Severus had completely forgotten that he had a present waiting for him. The last time he received a gift of any kind was when he himself was a student at Hogwarts; and even then it wasn't that great. He scoffed to himself remembering the ugly knit sweater his mother had shipped to him at school.
A rush of a guilt washed over him when he realized that he had nothing to give Marie in return. He placed the glass of Firewhiskey on the coffee table and walked over to the tree, bending to hold the wrapped item in his hands. Severus gave it a slight shake but heard nothing that gave away the identity of the contents. I wonder what it is?
Marie appeared in the doorway between the living room and kitchen and grinned at the sight of him peeking at the present. "Open it, then." She folded her arms, amused. Severus was a little embarrassed that he was caught and turned to face her.
"First, what exactly are you covered in?" Severus pointed and raised one brow. He looked Marie up and down, examining the fine white powder that was sprinkled on her long sleeve tee and jeans.
"Oh…" Marie quickly wiped her hands over front to dust herself. "Since it's Christmas Eve I've made special cookies for after dinner."
Severus only nodded. "Are you alright with me opening this now?" he returned his attention to the object in his hands. Marie was surprised at how eager he seemed although he did his best to conceal his emotions. She looked back over her shoulder to check that the timer was set for the oven and headed for the sofa. Severus sank into his armchair once more and gently pulled at the ribbon of the box.
Marie lay on her side and watched Severus as he tore the paper and lifted the lid on the box. Once he saw inside he made no sound. I don't believe this… In his hands was an object that he had been after for many years: the missing volume of an ancient Dark Arts collection. It was the last one he needed in order to create a complete set. Severus had searched every Wizarding bookstore and thrift shop hoping to come across a copy that wasn't completely damaged.
"How… Where did you…" Severus was at a loss for words. His fingers traced the cover of the book; the title still had a perfect silver glimmer to it. "It's too perfect to be real."
Marie was smiling the whole time. "Well, whenever you leave for business I get extremely bored so I began going through your bookshelves, hoping to be entertained." She admitted with a smug look. "I noticed that you were missing this one and it just so happened that I had it sitting in my school trunk."
Severus looked up at her in surprise but didn't even flinch at the fact she had been rummaging through his belongings. "And just how did it come to be in your trunk?"
"Just one of those things that gets passed down through generations, I suppose." She explained as she rolled onto her back and looked up at the ceiling.
"It will be a real treat to be able to finally finish this. Marie… thank you." Severus was genuine in his appreciation and it made her blush. She looked on as he opened the hard cover carefully and he glanced over the first few pages.
The silence in the room left Marie alone with her thoughts. Her eyes dragged away from him, to the fireplace, over to the tree and eventually to the floor in front of her. She did not want to break his concentration but the shuffling of her feet on the wood floor caught his attention.
"Is everything alright?" he placed the book in his lap and waited for an answer. Marie had shut her eyes tight and was fighting the oncoming urge to break into tears. Severus heard the faint gasps escape her mouth as she covered it with one hand.
"It's nothing." Marie nearly choked.
"It has to do with the last lesson, doesn't it?" Severus knew better.
"I didn't want to ruin tonight," she began, sitting up and looking at him. Marie hated how much of a know-it-all he was. "Ever since you saw that… I just… I can't stop thinking about it. I've never told a soul about it and now that I know about my lineage… It all makes sense. Every odd thing that's ever happened to me is most likely due to Slytherin." She wiped her eyes.
Severus conjured up a refill of the Firewhiskey and a glass of water for Marie although he debated offering her some alcohol for comfort. He set the book delicately on the table and braced himself for her explanation. "You have a heavy memory that you have been shouldering for over a decade. Perhaps now is a better time than any to unburden yourself." Marie nodded in agreement and Severus took hold of his drink once more.
Marie drew in a deep breath and began wringing her hands. "I… When I was about six…" she began, her voice cracking. "I accidentally killed my father…" she blinked hard and more tears fell. Severus's eyes widened; he knew he was witnessing a funeral in her memories but he had no clue as to whose or the why.
"How do you know you were to blame? Surely if you did not mean to then there's nothing to feel guilty about – six is too young to be calling someone a murderer." Severus attempted to reassure her with logical reasoning.
Marie shook her head and let out a sarcastic chuckle. "They all told me so… and I believed it." Severus recalled the disdain that the other figures present at the funeral seemed to have for her. "My own family… They blamed my mother and I. After that day we, or I, was cast aside forever."
"How did it happen?" Severus pressed on. This was more information than what Dumbledore had even given him. He had also begun to wonder why no one seemed to be asking of Marie's whereabouts since the fall of Hogwarts.
She shrugged and wiped her face again. "This was before I started to notice that I had magical abilities, or what a witch even was." Marie paused to take a drink of water. "I remember being very angry. The next door neighbors had this awful demon of a child, a little older than me." She waved her hand dismissively. "I was in the yard playing when he approached me and began teasing me, eventually pushing me down into the dirt. This day he took things way too far, much like what people want to do to me now… I guess I didn't notice that my father was running towards us to save me." Her upper lip began quivering but she held it back.
"It felt like there was an earthquake below my feet. There was a flash of light that blinded me, and then nothing." She looked back at Severus who was intently listening. "When I came to, the boy was injured but my father didn't make it. Whatever I produced that day destroyed him."
Severus furrowed his brow. "If it was anything like what you exhibited back there," he pointed in the direction of the study. "Then that shouldn't have killed him – Draco and I are just fine. Why would the other boy survive as well and not your father?"
"Professor, I honestly don't know how it happened." Marie was exasperated. She spent her whole life obsessing over the reasons as to why things unfolded the way they did. "He was a Muggle, so I think that he just didn't know how to defend himself against magic." She said sadly.
He nodded slowly. "It's a possibility. Your mother is the witch then? What happened to her?"
"She never blamed me," Marie began quickly. "She was a wonderful woman, but her time was also cut short – some incurable sickness. I had just gotten my Hogwarts letter."
Severus felt awful for not being aware of the troubles of his own snake. "Then where have you resided during the summer breaks?"
Marie started to answer his question when the timer in the kitchen rang loudly, interrupting their conversation. She gave a half smile and rose to tend to their awaiting dessert. "I don't want them to burn." Marie left the room quickly.
Severus sat still and reflected on what she disclosed to him. He couldn't believe that someone with such an awful past, and future for the time being, would still turn out to be so stable and generally optimistic. Severus had similar horrors in his childhood and yet he allowed those experiences to turn him into a bitter, nasty man. Tonight's festivities sure didn't turn out the way he wanted them to and he did not want the night to end on a sour note.
Severus stood in the doorway of the kitchen and cleared his throat. Marie had finished scraping the cookies from the pan and was gently placing them on an old serving tray that she found in the cupboard. "Honestly, you need a woman's touch in here – I can't find anything that I need." She mused, trying to lighten the mood. She crossed the kitchen without looking at him, opened the small fridge door and retrieved some icing that she prepared earlier in the evening. On her return to the serving tray Severus had stepped in her path.
"Yes?" Marie clutched the plastic tubing and looked up. She noted that his features were soft looking, almost apologetic. For reasons unknown, even to himself, Severus slowly outstretched his arms to her. She stepped forward and hesitantly accepted his embrace. As his arms wrapped around her, Marie dropped the container. She was stunned at his display of empathy and openness.
"I'm sorry." Severus rested his head atop hers when she buried her face against his chest. "I'm sorry for all of it." Marie wasn't afraid in this moment; she felt calm, safe. There was never anything inappropriate in their interactions to make her feel otherwise. This was a kind, comforting gesture, albeit out of character. However, he seemed to be the only person that didn't want to take anything from her or to use her.
His long cloak enveloped her and warmed her. She remembered why people always called him the bat of the dungeons. Marie breathed in deep and smelled spices and earth. It reminded her of Potions class and the Slytherin Common Room. Her head remained pressed against him but she turned her neck slightly so he could hear her speak. "Happy Christmas, sir." She barely whispered.