Chapter 9 - How Will I Know?
Cas reappeared on the forest floor at the base of Kilimanjaro a moment later, dazed and disoriented.
God was leaning against a tree, leafing through the Book of Life. Cas stared, his mouth agape. "I had forgotten how many secrets there are in here," He remarked. "No wonder that red file was so confidential. Did you know that there are instructions in here on how to bring people back from the dead?" He looked up from the Book at his Son. "But, look who I'm talking to," God continued, and now Cas could hear the sarcasm in his Father's voice. "Of course you knew that. You didn't climb that mountain just for the fresh air and exercise, did you, Castiel?"
"I won't do it," Cas said quickly. "You have my word. Please. Bring her back, and I will do anything You say. Please."
"Anything?" God said, closing the Book with a snap. "Will you take care of that little matter on the mountain, as you should have done?"
"Yes," Cas said without hesitation. "If that is Your Will. If that is what must be done, then I will do it."
"There you go," God said to Death, who suddenly appeared beside Him. Death was expressionless, but he felt suspicion. Castiel appeared to be falling in line, but the Angel had a storied reputation of saying one thing, and then doing quite another.
Cas's heart was beating a mile a minute as his Father continued to stare at him. Perhaps God was thinking the same thing. But his Son knew the consequences for lying to the Almighty. What he had just gone through would seem like a gentle caress compared to what God would do to him if he didn't keep his word this time. This one was going to hurt Cas worse than any of the others, but he had no choice but to do it, because it was God's Will.
"You have five minutes," God said. He waved His hand, and Gail appeared. Then God waved His hand again, and he and Death were gone.
Cas rushed to his wife, taking her in his arms. Five minutes? He kissed her face, again and again. Five minutes. He held her tightly. She still hadn't spoken. Did she have any idea what was going on? But they only had five minutes, and when Castiel followed through on the promise he'd made to their Father, Gail might decide that she never wanted to see Cas again. Five minutes. He only had five minutes to shower her with his love.
"Cas, you're squishing me," she protested. "What's going on? Where's God? Where are Sam and Dean?"
He took her hands in his. "We only have a couple of minutes left," he told her. "How much do you remember?"
Gail was confused. "What do you mean? What are you talking about?"
"I don't have time to explain," Cas said, distressed. "I have to tell you something: What I am about to do on that mountain is God's Will. I am not doing it because I want to. I am doing it because our Father requires me to do it. If I renege on my promise, the consequences will be catastrophic. I need you to remember that, and to remember that I love you. Please. Remember that I love you, and I love our friends. No; our brothers."
Gail had no idea what her husband was babbling about, but she was really scared, now. Cas had tears in his eyes, and he was squeezing her hands so tightly that he was almost hurting her. "What are you going to do, Cas?" she said in a trembling voice.
But their five minutes were up, and the couple suddenly disappeared from the forest floor.
Oh, geez. Gail was getting scared now. Sam was going to bite her in a second, if she didn't do something. She had no powers here on this stupid mountain. So she did the only thing she could do: she lifted up her head and screamed, calling for help from Cas and Dean.
The two of them came running a minute later, and Gail felt herself being wrenched out of Sam's grasp. Cas was pulling her away from him. "Are you all right?" Cas asked frantically. "Did he hurt you?"
As Gail was assuring Cas that she was okay, Dean was fighting to restrain his brother. "Sam! Sammy!" he exclaimed. Holy crap.
"Tie me up," Sam was saying through gritted teeth. "Restrain me. Please."
Cas let go of Gail and rushed to help Dean. The two men seized Sam by the arms and hauled him to his feet. Sam was struggling mightily now, even as he was imploring them to restrain him. Sam was fighting with himself just as much as he was fighting with his brother and his best friend. He was hungry. He was scared. He was ravenous. He was glad that Gail had screamed when she did. But the blood was running so hot in his veins right now...
"Please go into Dean's backpack, and get out the climbing rope," Cas said to Gail. He and Dean muscled Sam over to a tree at the edge of the path as Gail ran over to Dean's backpack. She rummaged through it, got the rope, and ran over to the men.
They lashed Sam to the tree with the rope. "Tie me tighter," Sam told them, still struggling. They pulled tighter on the line, until he was secure.
Dean stood back, looking at his brother. Wow. That had escalated quickly.
Cas looked at Gail. "Remember what I said, my love. Please," he said, agonized. Then he glanced at Dean. If Cas waited any longer, he was going to lose his nerve. It was God's Will, he reminded himself. He had made the promise. If he reneged, the consequences would be catastrophic.
He took the silver Angel blade out of his pocket, advancing on Sam.
"Cas, what the hell?!" Dean exclaimed angrily.
"No. No!" Gail screamed. She ran after Cas, yanking on his blade arm. He stopped for an instant, then shook her off and strode forward. "Thy Will be done," Cas said, and he stabbed Sam in the heart with the blade, killing him instantly.
The three of them stood there for what seemed like an eternity, frozen in shock at what Cas had just done. Finally, the Angel stepped back, regarding Sam as the younger Winchester's head drooped forward. The blood was gushing from his chest. Cas had made sure to pierce the aorta, ensuring that Sam's death would be as quick and merciful as possible.
Dean's paralysis broke, and he rushed forward, grabbing the blade out of Cas's hand. For one heart-stopping moment, Gail thought that Dean was going to stab Cas with it, but the elder Winchester hurried over to where Sam was, and used the blade to cut the ropes that bound his brother. Sam crumpled to the ground and Dean dropped the blade, falling to his knees beside his little brother. He checked Sam for any signs of life, but his efforts were futile.
Dean gathered Sam up in his arms, cradling his brother's head to his own chest. He looked up at Cas. "You goddamn son of a bitch," Dean said through clenched teeth. "You goddamn son of a bitch!"
Then Dean rocked Sam, like he used to do when his brother was a baby, fussing in his cradle. Back before the two of them had known anything about monsters, or Demons. Or Angels.
Dean was sobbing now, and so was Cas. But Gail wasn't. No, Gail wasn't crying at all. She was in a white-hot rage. She looked up at the sky. "That's enough!" she shouted. "What the hell is the matter with you? Where the hell do you get off, treating us all like this? Stop it. Just...stop. How can you do this to us, after everything we've suffered? And, for what? Just so you can demonstrate your mastery over all of us? Well, so what? Where have you been, all this time? There were so many times when we could have used your help. So many times. And now here you come, out of the blue. Why? Just to mess with us?"
God appeared suddenly. "It's not 'out of the blue'," he said coolly, "and you know that. There are plenty of pages in that Book left to come, my Daughter, and we're going to keep on doing this until you both get it right. The last time, Castiel refused. He said he wouldn't put you through it again. When he used the Appendix page that Death gave him, he did his utmost to shake you. But no matter what he tried to do, there you were. So, he finally had to give in to the inevitable. Now, how about you?"
"Why? What do you mean?" Gail asked the Almighty angrily.
"You know exactly what I mean," God insisted. "You have the temerity, the absolute and utter gall, to stand there and act all innocent with Me?"
Gail was still genuinely confused. But she was also getting a tickle in her brain now, an inkling that she sort of did know what he was referring to.
"Fine," God sighed. "You will have your opportunity, just as Castiel had his. We will meet back here, once you have righted your own wrongs. Now, go."
God put one hand on Gail's head and the other on Cas's, and the Angels were gone.
"What made me think that I had the right to anything? Much less anything as perfect as your love?" Cas was saying. But his voice was muffled, because he'd wrapped her up so tightly in the damn blanket.
Gail began to squirm, and Cas gasped. She was still alive? How could that be?
"Cas, let me go. You're squishing me," Gail told him.
He unwrapped the blanket, checking her wounds. She still had them, and her chest was bleeding. But Crowley had missed her heart with his blade. He had missed her heart! Gail was still alive!
"What the hell was THAT all about?" Gail asked Castiel, as he put his hand on her chest, healing her wounds. She watched as he did it. Now that she knew he was an Angel, the sight wasn't as shocking as it would have been if she hadn't known, of course. But it was no less wondrous.
When she was completely healed, Gail cast the blanket aside. "What do you mean, 'perfect'?" she said to him, as if continuing a conversation they'd already been having. "You've actually MET me, right? Cas, there's nothing perfect about us, and our lives. Nothing. I waited for you all my life, and then you finally showed up." Cas's lips twitched. She had no idea. "All of her life", indeed. She was so cute. He'd waited untold millennia for her. But then Cas's smile faded as Gail continued, "And then, when you did show up, you told me you loved me, but then you left, and you didn't come back."
"I'm so sorry, Gail. I should not have done that," Cas said to her. "I was struggling with a lot of things at that time. I thought that loving you, and humans, was a Sin. That's what I had been indoctrinated to believe. But once I met you, I came to realize that you were the only one, the only thing, that mattered to me. That's why I came back. That's why I resigned my post in Heaven. To be with you. To love you, as you deserve."
"And to nearly get me killed. Don't forget about that part," she said tartly, and Cas winced. She wasn't wrong, though. "I will protect you," he said, frowning. "I will never leave your side."
"No, Cas," Gail said to him. "No. I can't live like that." She looked down at the ring box, which was laying on the ground where Cas had dropped it, when Hakeem had shown up. "I love you too, Cas, but I can't marry you."
Cas could feel his vessel's heart breaking, but he understood it from her point of view. Why should she be willing to become a target for his many enemies? He just needed to be grateful that she was still alive. "Can we still see each other, at least?" he asked her.
"I guess so," Gail responded hesitantly. "But, for now, can you just take me home? I've lost my appetite. As it is, I'm going to have to hide these bloody clothes from my mom. She'll freak out if she sees me like this. Too bad I didn't have a change of clothes with me."
"I'll call Gabriel," Cas said, his expression brightening. "He can bring you some new clothing." He called the Archangel on their frequency, briefly explaining what had happened here.
Gabriel showed up a few minutes later, handing Gail a plain blue top and a new pair of jeans. He looked at her ring hand, then glanced at his Brother with a puzzled expression. Cas gave him a slight shake of the head.
"Go ahead and change, Penguin," Gabe said affably, using the nickname he'd decided to give her. "Cas and I will turn around."
The men turned their backs on Gail as she took off her bloody top. "What the hell, Cas?" Gabriel said over their frequency. "I thought you were going to propose!" "I did," Cas answered sadly. "But, Hakeem showed up, and then Crowley attacked her. She then decided she didn't want to be the wife of the most hated Angel in existence."
"OK, you can turn around, now," Gail said to the men.
"OK, here's what's gonna happen," Gabe said with a frown. He looked at Cas. "You're going to go up to Heaven, and wait for me there." Then he looked at Gail. "You're going to come with me for a drink, and a little chat." He snapped his fingers, and the bloody clothes Gail had been holding disappeared, along with all of the items Cas had brought for the picnic. Except for the ring box, that was. Cas had slipped that back into his pocket.
Gabriel grabbed Gail by the hand and winked her out of there, without another word. He brought her to the Rogue Angel, to a dark corner table. He snapped his fingers again, and drinks appeared on the table in front of them. Gabe wasn't in the mood to screw around, doing everything the human way.
"I've been called many things," he said to Gail, without preliminary. "If people are being charitable, they call me eccentric, or a rascal. If not, I'm a drunk. A clown. A Lothario. And, you know what? I'm all of those things. I always have been. I haven't changed in thousands and thousands of years. Why should I? I like the way I am. But because I am the way I am, I've never had any real responsibility in Heaven. I let guys like Cas do all the heavy lifting. But I think it's about time I helped my Brother out. I'll never change, Gail, but Cas really does want to change. He's got all those enemies for a reason, but he doesn't want to be that guy anymore."
"I don't know anything about him, Gabriel," Gail fretted. She took a big sip of her drink, and then she took another. Gabe wiggled his little finger, and another full glass appeared in front of her.
"Drink up; there's plenty more where that came from," Gabriel said as Gail's lips twitched. "How do you think I get so many beautiful women to go to bed with me?" he added, waggling an eyebrow at her.
Gail laughed briefly, but then she became reflective. "I think my problem is that I don't know anything about anything," she said in a subdued tone. "I've lived at home with my parents all my life, and my mom is really overprotective. I think I need to get out there, and experience more of life. At least get my own place. But I really don't have much money. I work part-time at the library at Sam's university, but that's it. I'm really not qualified to do anything else."
"You're a librarian? Dammit!" Gabe said softly, smirking. "I need a librarian, to get a Bingo." His hand covered hers on the tabletop. "Maybe I could be one of those life experiences."
Gail eyed him suspiciously. Was he joking, or not? It was hard to tell. "Thanks, but I think I'll pass," she said lightly. "I think you're just a little TOO experienced for me. I've never actually...Whoops. I didn't mean to say that," she stammered, embarrassed.
"You mean - you and Cas didn't...But you've been dating for a year!" Gabriel exclaimed, amazed. Wow. No wonder Cas was trying to put a ring on it, as the human expression went. His Brother was the type of guy who thought that sex out of wedlock was a Sin, and Gail was obviously too innocent to know the difference. Double dammit. If he had been a less honourable man, Gabe could do a lot with that situation. But Cas was his Brother, and the poor guy was gonna be heartbroken for a while as it was. Gabriel was going to tell him to hang onto that ring, though. The game wasn't over until it was over.
Gabriel snapped his fingers again, and a satchel appeared on the table beside their drinks. "What's this?" she asked him curiously.
"Your freedom," the Archangel told her. "Take it, get your own place, and do some travelling. Have some of those experiences. Travel. Write. Do whatever you want. I don't think any of Cas's enemies will bother to come after you if you two kids stay apart for a while. Then, if you feel like you want to see him again, all you have to do is pray to him, by name." Another eyebrow waggle. "Or, you could pray to me. My Brotherly loyalty only goes so far."
Once again, Gail couldn't tell if he was joking about that last part, or not. But whether he was or whether he wasn't, that really didn't matter. There was no way. He was nice to her, and his boyish charm was undeniable. But it was Cas who she loved, despite everything. She just didn't feel like she could be with Cas right now.
Gail peeked into the satchel, and then she looked at Gabriel, wide-eyed. "How much money is in here?" she asked him in a hushed voice.
"About half a mil," Gabriel said casually, taking a sip from his drink. "Freedom don't come cheap, Penguin."
Gail smiled. "Thank you for being so good to me," she said to the Archangel.
He waved his hand in dismissal of her gratitude, even though he liked to hear it. And, quite frankly, he'd expected to hear it. "De nada. Now, let's finish our drinks, and I'll escort you home."
As God watched the two of them together, he wondered idly if it was Gail and Gabriel who should have fallen in love. In many ways, they were an excellent match. Gabe was attracted to innocence, but he also needed a woman who would give him a bit of a challenge. Gail needed a strong man, who was also gentlemanly and kind. If God waved His little finger right now, the pair would be kissing within minutes, and with Gabriel's prodigious track record, Gail probably wouldn't stand a chance. But God didn't want to be too heavy-handed about it, because Gabriel was behaving honourably, right now. The Almighty had sent Gail back here for a reason. She'd had the audacity to question Him and His methods, telling Him that HE was the one who was in the wrong. Where had Gail been, when God had made the world? At least Castiel had been there from the very Beginning. And, yes, Gail had seen her share of heartaches and torments as Castiel's one true mate, but she had yet to learn the same lessons that Castiel had, about obeying the one true Almighty God. But, that was all right. When the situation warranted, God could be a very effective teacher. Gail had been much too sheltered. Now, she was going to find out what it was like to have to make the hard choices. By the time they all reconvened on Kilimanjaro, she would be as docile as a lamb.
Rowena was having a modicum of success rebuilding her coven. It was a slow and laborious process, because the selection process was dual. Sort of like a marriage, really. She had to determine whether her prospective protegees were both eager enough and skilled enough to practice dedication to the craft. And it didn't hurt if they were willing to use some less than lily-white methods to achieve their goals, either.
So, Rowena chose them, but they chose her, as well. There were some who dabbled in the black magic she was teaching, but once things became a little too real for the dilettantes, they quickly left her circle.
Felicia had joined Rowena and Patricia now. She and Lucifer were seeing a lot of each other, and she was completely dominated by him. She was at Satan's beck and call 24/7, doing anything she could to make him happy. At first, it had taken very little effort to do so. But once he had moved into her apartment and she had taught him how to use her computer, he had started to get a lot of ideas about how he wanted certain things to go. He spent countless hours looking up a variety of sexual acts and positions, and he was tiring her out, trying them all. So far it had just been the two of them, but he had already put her on notice that he would be wanting to include others, in the future. He'd also tried a few things out on her that had been very painful, but Felicia had borne it all stoically. Most of her bruising and broken skin was in areas that wouldn't be on display to the public, anyway.
Rowena had advertised in the newspaper for assistants for her new dress shop. Patricia had teased the ancient witch about that, saying that no one looked at newspapers any more. Nonetheless, Rowena was the boss, she had chided her assistant gently. Just because they had an intimate relationship didn't mean that Rowena wasn't in charge. In fact, Patricia had better get used to the fact that Rowena was going to be intimate with whoever she fancied, whenever she liked. She enjoyed what they did together, but the redhead was not willing to restrict herself to monogamy with anyone, and she didn't expect Patricia to, either.
Felicia had walked into the shop in response to the ad, after Lucifer had noticed it in the newspaper. As another ancient being, he favoured newspapers over computers for certain things, and job ads were one of them. But he hadn't been looking for a job for himself, of course. Satan didn't work; he gave others the privilege of toiling for him. Felicia already had a part-time job, but she wasn't bringing home enough money for his liking. So he'd sent her to the dress shop, where she'd met Rowena and Patricia, and began what would be her training in the art of black magic.
And, as sometimes happens in these types of situations, Lucifer grew restless and bored being cooped up in the apartment alone all day. So he started taking walks around the neighbourhood. But, he didn't "do" bright sunshine and lots of noise. Boy, was Earth ever noisy. Traffic, people, construction, people, airplanes, and people. He'd tried watching daytime TV, but it was just a bunch of humans yammering on about their stupid, piddly little problems. Talk, talk, talk. Yap, yap, yap. As soon as Lucifer took over, that would be one of his first official acts: executing all of those people. Just on general principles.
The Devil started spending a lot of his time in dark bars. Many people who frequented those sorts of places during the day were his sort of people, the people he would be recruiting for his Army, as soon as he could figure out how to go about that.
He stopped into the Texas Panhandle Saloon early one afternoon for a drink or five, just to see what the clientele would be like in a place like that. Probably boot-kicking music, and monosyllabic conversation. But there would be lots of his people there, Lucifer was sure.
Two drinks in, a shorter man with a neatly trimmed beard sat next to the Devil. He registered with some surprise that the newcomer had an expensive-looking black suit on. And when he spoke in a smooth English accent, Lucifer's astonishment grew.
Crowley was trying not to smirk at the expression on Lucifer's face. The King of Hell had been making one of his surprise inspections here on Earth. That was something he liked to do every now and then, to make sure that the Demons he had assigned topside were where they were supposed to be, and doing what they were supposed to be doing. Demons tended to get distracted by Earthly pleasures, but Crowley didn't necessarily mind that, provided they got their jobs done.
He had just come out of one of the safe houses when the King detected a presence in the area. Whoever it was, it was a major player. His sources had told him that Castiel and Gabriel and the other Upper Echelon were sticking pretty close to Heaven these days, and besides, this felt like one of his, not one of theirs. So he'd walked into that ridiculously-named bar out of sheer curiosity, and he'd been astonished to see who it was.
"Howdy, Pardner," Crowley said to Lucifer, his lips twitching. "Fancy a drink?"
Another woman stopped by the dress shop to apply for a job, but this one was a little less innocent than Felicia. In fact, she was a lot less innocent.
In His eagerness to prove His point, God had brought someone back from the dead, but she was no one that anyone on the side of Good would ever want to see. Nevertheless, he felt like her presence could be very instrumental in the future, if things played out the way He thought they might.
God was looking forward to seeing what would happen when the time came for Gail to demonstrate her vastly superior decision-making abilities, He thought sarcastically. The Almighty Lord had created many things in His many, many years of existence, but He had definitely perfected sarcasm. God was supposed to be above such things, but the Father of Everything had felt the hurt and anger that every parent feels when dealing with a defiant and ungrateful child. It was not Gail's place to question His Word; it was her place to obey it. That particular point was a lesson that Castiel and Gabriel also seemed to need refreshers on, from time to time. Castiel had just received his, when God had instructed him to sacrifice Sam Winchester. God had decided to give Gabriel a pass for now, in favour of correcting Gail, instead. How much sharper than a serpent's tooth was a thankless child, or words to that effect. Was that the Bible, or Shakespeare? God could no longer remember.
He watched as the tall, titian-haired woman walked into the dress shop. "I'm here to apply for the job," Abbadon said, smiling widely.
Castiel had been back in Heaven for a while now, and the longer he was there and not on Earth, the further he had begun to backslide. It had been months, and he hadn't heard one word from Gail. Not one. Gabriel had told Cas a while back that she was probably just going out there, having those life experiences she'd wanted to have. Cas supposed she was entitled to have them, but still, he'd been hurt that she hadn't prayed to him once in a while, at least to let him know she was thinking of him, too. She had told him she loved him. Had that been a lie?
Ignatius had allowed Raphael to come back into the fold, after the latter had claimed to have remorse for his previous attitude. But it was all just pretense, of course. Raphael had started to make some inroads with Castiel, attempting to persuade his Brother to return to his previously-held views. They should be annexing Earth, just as they had talked about for centuries. Just as they had planned to do, before Castiel's head had been turned by certain humans. But he had fallen in love, Castiel protested, and he had made some friends. Really? Well, where were they now? Raphael had asked Cas, and he'd had no answer, because of course, Raphael was right. They were all doing just fine without him. He had always been the outsider, the "weirdo". They had only been civil to him because he had been with Gail. And what ABOUT Gail? Cas didn't have The Eye, so he'd asked Gabriel to look for her, to make sure that she was all right. She was fine, Gabe had reported back. His theory had been proven correct. Once Cas and Gail had parted, none of Cas's enemies had bothered with her. At first, that logic had made Cas stay away. But as more and more time elapsed, he could only come to the sad conclusion that she had washed her hands of him.
Then the despondency had set in, followed almost immediately by the anger. He was an Angel of the Lord, God's right hand. How had he been allowed to forget about his true purpose? He had been completely misled, or perhaps he had misled himself. But at least he had not given in to temptation by forsaking his Brothers for Earth, and its empty promises.
"Ignatius insists that he will not re-open the vote for annexation, even though you were not there for it," Raphael was fuming. "Nor was Brother Jason. I then pointed out to him that the results were illegal, and do you know what he said to me? He said that his word was The Word! Can you imagine?"
Castiel was livid. "No. I cannot. He is not the Lord God! Obviously, the power of the Office has gone to his head. He must be educated."
Raphael was smiling now. The tide was turning; he could feel it. "So, does that mean you will stand with me on the matter of annexation?"
Castiel was thoughtful. Why not? Why shouldn't he? Still, he hesitated. "I will go to Earth on a reconnaissance mission, and when I return, we will convince Ignatius to re-open the vote." He opened his jacket to show Raphael his Angel blade. "One way, or the other."
The Archangel nodded. That would have to do, for now. Castiel was a stubborn man, sometimes. If you pushed him too far too quickly, he would push back, sometimes despite himself. It was the same with his Brother's brief love affair with Earth, and the humans. Jason had wanted to force the issue, by going after the woman. But Raphael had convinced Jason to play the long game instead, and that had been the right call. Now, Castiel had seen the true nature of those humans he'd thought were his friends. Even the female had deserted him now. Oh, yes. Castiel would lead Heaven's armies when the Angels took the Earth for their own, and it would be glorious.
Castiel appeared suddenly in the mens' room of the Rogue Angel, startling Gabriel. The Archangel didn't need to use that room for its usual purpose, of course, but he went in there every now and then to check his appearance, or to re-apply some cologne. He'd been engaged in both of those activities when Cas had popped in, seemingly without the fear of being seen.
"What are you doing here?" Gabriel said, frowning. "Does your BFF Raffy have other plans tonight?" Gabriel was well aware that his fellow Archangel had been metaphorically wooing Castiel ever since he'd gotten back to Heaven, and he didn't like it one bit. But there was really nothing he could do about it. Raphael was the only one who was doing the talking. Gabriel's little Penguin had apparently decided that Castiel came with too much baggage, and even though that made Gabe sad, he couldn't disagree with her, there. Gail was out there in the bar right now, in fact, with her brother and all of their friends. They were throwing her a Bon Voyage party. After getting her own place and setting it up the way she'd wanted, Gail was now going to do some of that travelling she'd spoken about. Was that why Castiel had chosen today to come here?
"Let's go, then," Gabriel said to his Brother, and the men walked out into the bar area.
The place was loud and raucous. Cas noticed Gail immediately. She was sitting at a table in the centre of the room, having drinks with her friends. There was a big group of people. Cas's heart was warm with the knowledge that she was loved, and that she hadn't been alone. But then, he felt a stab of resentment. She was here, happily going on with her life, not missing him at all. And there he had been in Heaven, completely miserable, feeling as if half of himself was missing. Contemplating the capture of the planet Earth and the vanquishing of every human who would not bow down to the Angels' will. And why? For revenge?
Cas walked over to Gail's table and she looked at him, open-mouthed. He still looked as handsome as ever, but there was an expression on his face that she'd never seen before.
"Hey, Cas," Frank said, with a bit of an edge to his voice. Gail had come home early from her picnic with Cas that day, rushed straight to her room, and closed and locked the door. Then he could hear her crying, inside. But when he'd knocked on the door, she'd told him to leave her alone.
Frank had shrugged. It didn't take a genius to figure out what had happened. Cas had dumped his sister. There was no way it had been the other way around. Gail got all googly-eyed whenever Cas's name was even mentioned. But, it was probably just as well; Cas was a weird guy, anyway. Frank, Sam and Dean always made running jokes about what was wrong with Cas. He was in the Mafia. He was a cross-dresser. He was a Demon. Dean joked that they should get some of that Holy water they had in the weapons cabinet at the office and "accidentally" spill it on the guy, just to see what happened. They'd all had a laugh about that. But after Gail had spent all night that day crying and then had come out of her room the next morning to have breakfast with the reddest, puffiest eyes Frank had ever seen, any mention of Cas was strictly verboten.
So they had all begun to forget about Gail's whacko boyfriend. But here he was again, messing with Frank's sister's head.
"May I talk to you for a moment?" Castiel said to Gail, ignoring Frank.
"Why don't you just leave her alone?" Frank said angrily. "Haven't you screwed with her enough?"
Gail put her hand on Frank's arm. "I appreciate that protective big-brother thing you're doing right now, but this is my business," she told him. She stood from her chair and she and Cas moved over to a corner of the bar.
The music and all of the conversation made it very loud in the room, so they had to stand close so that they could converse. But Cas didn't mind; not one bit.
"How have you been?" he asked her. And then, he said something kind of strange: "Are you happy?"
Gail let out a breath. "I'm OK, Cas. How are YOU?"
He frowned. "Why do you ask?"
Her heart sank. "You're mad because I haven't called you," she said, sighing. "I'm sorry, I just...it felt weird, thinking about praying to you. And I haven't really had any of those experiences I talked about having, yet. But, I WILL have them. I've got a ticket in my pocket for a cruise to the Caribbean, and I'm going alone. I'm terrified, but I have to make myself get out there and do things. I can't just sit at home all the time, afraid of life."
The Caribbean! Cas thought with alarm. Why did the sound of that scare him so much? "Don't go," he said to her, taking her hand. "Please. Don't go. If you want to travel, I can take you anywhere you want to go. I can take you to the furthest reaches of the globe. Please, Gail. I love you. Raphael will not infect me with his poison. The world is much too wondrous a place to destroy. Please, let me love you, Gail. We'll find a way."
She looked up at him. This was nuts. They couldn't keep doing this same thing, over and over again. Cas was weird, and he came with so much baggage. Now he was talking about some guy named Raphael, and destroying the world? What the hell? What did he want from her?
Gail let out another slow breath, more like a sigh. What did he want from her? Nothing she wasn't willing to give. "Life experiences"? Who was she kidding? Without Cas, she HAD no life.
She reached into her pocket with her free hand, gave his hand a squeeze with the other, and then tore up the ticket.