Sorry that I haven't updated in a while, I've sort of been trying to focus on Break My Bones

Chapter 10: Alone and Looking

I awoke with the ever familiar sense of cold loneliness. Despite the fact that Ted Strayer was lying next to me, I felt more isolated than ever. This was becoming normal for me. I started drinking at night to dull the pain in my stomach from lack of other emotions.

I'm so fucking alone. I needed to find Charon soon.

Harkness wasn't really taking a hint. It's like he was a robot. He didn't really express emotions well.

I was more than well supplied, so I would be able to leave today if I so felt like it. I still had over eight hundred caps to spend, but I would just wait for Underworld to spend it. I don't even know how much Charon's contract would cost.

I was planning to just loot Anacostia and sell what I didn't need. I needed to become more independent on my way to not have to be so independent.

I stood up from the old mattress in the Weatherly Motel. I got dressed fast and pulled my boots on. I looked in the mirror to see if I looked as shitty as I felt.

It seemed like a stranger was staring back at me. My hair was still pink, just a little bit longer. I sold the vault armor after I found something more effective. It was made of leather and it made my ass look great. I was losing a lot of weight. I couldn't help but notice I smelled like booze and sex. It was becoming my natural smell.

Dad would be so ashamed of me.

I had thought of just giving up and turning to a needle but I never liked them. And everything else was just too expensive. Drinking just seemed to be the only option.

Before I went to the Muddy Rudder last night, I sat on the shower floor. The sound of the water drowned out me crying. I held the razor to my wrist and weighed the pros and cons of killing myself. As of now, the only thing I had going for me was finding Dad and Butch.

As soon as I thought of him, I put the razor down and wrapped my arms around my knees. They wouldn't even know I was dead. They would assume I was alive and well.

Butch never told me he loved me, but when I woke up next to him on regular basis with his arms pulling me as close as possible, I felt loved. And I repay him by sleeping with a new stranger every week?

I stopped wallowing in my own self pity long enough to leave the hotel room and leave the city behind me. I was walking down the ramp through the Anacostia gates, when I heard a loud crashing.

Already shit going down today? At least I was prepared. I grabbed my Chinese assault rifle and held it tightly. The crashing was getting louder. Whoever it was, they were coming towards me.

I aimed my gun at the corner and held my breath. A can rolled towards me. A woman with a fucked up haircut rounded the corner. She reached for her weapon behind her. I pulled the trigger and her head exploded in a mess of red chunks on the wall. She fell to the ground with a loud thud.

I needed a quieter weapon. I was going to alert everyone in the metro if I haven't already. I looted the woman and pocketed ten caps and her sledge hammer. I would just have to bludgeon everyone here.

After several hours of beating people to death with a hammer, I had over two hundred caps, several useless weapons that I planned to sell, a lot of drugs, and a steadier supply of ammo.

I stepped out into the bright sunlight. I shielded my eyes as they tried to adjust after hours in the dark.

"Welcome tourist." A woman with a gravelly voice greeted.

"Hello, is this Underworld?"

"Yes, why do you want to know?"

"My friend Gob told me to come here to employ Charon."

"You're here then. And tell Gob that I said hey."

"Alright. Thank you."

She grumbled in response. I opened the doors to the museum and a rush of cold air hit me. It was a refreshing change. I didn't even know they had working air conditioners anymore.

Everything was so dark. A broken dinosaur lay at my feet. It was both disturbing and interesting. I'd only ever seen pictures in the history books in the vault. A mammoth sat on the other side of the room. It was enormous.

I walked up the not-so-inviting, yet fitting, entrance to Underworld. A ghoul in a blue, greasy jumpsuit turned around.

"Hello, my name is Eleanor. Do you know where I can find Charon?"

He looked at me skeptically.

"Why are you here?"

"I need to find Charon."

"You made that clear. Do you know what we are?"

"I know you're ghouls but I'm not exactly sure what a ghoul is."

"Now tell me, how is it that you ended up down here in Ghoul central without knowing what a Ghoul is? Huh? You know, never mind. I'm a Ghoul. Everyone down here: Ghouls. That's what we are. We're not the walking dead, despite the rotten flesh and the smell. We're mutants... sort of. At least, I think we are. And to answer your question, he's in the Ninth Circle."

"Well, thank you..."

"Winthrop. I'm Winthrop."

He flinched when I held my hand out but he took it and shook it.

"You don't mind touching me?"

"Not really, why?"

"Did you grow up under a rock or something?"

"I grew up in a vault. I just got out about a month ago."

His mouth formed an "o". "Well, you should try out the shops if you plan on staying a while."

"All right. Oh, by the way, what's a 'smoothskin'? I keep hearing ghouls say it."

"Smoothskin? You know, because your skin is so smooth... and tasty..."

My eyes widened in surprise. "Are you hitting on me?"

He didn't look pleased. "Very funny. No, I'm not. It was a zombie joke."

"I should probably go sell my junk." I said in an excuse to get the hell away from this train wreck.

"Bye, smoothskin."

"Bye, Winthrop."

I walked to the closest store I saw. A small ghoul stood behind the counter with her head in her hands.

"Hello? Do you think I could sell some things?"

She sat up quickly with a gasp. I'd say she hasn't had a customer in a while.

"Yes, yes. Come in."

I laid out all the guns and useless things I didn't need.

"I can give you three hundred for everything. That's all I have."

"Deal. This shit is too heavy."

She laughed with a little snort. She was very pleasant to be around. She was nice and laughed when I'm not even making jokes.

"What's your name? A pretty thing like you must always have a good name."

"Eleanor. What's yours?"

"Your name is very old, it's traditional. Probably an old relatives name. My name's Tulip."

"Oh yeah, Gob told me about you. Nothing bad, I swear."

"Oh, thank goodness. You had me worried for a second."

"I have a question. I'm here to get Charon's contract. Is there anything I should know about him before?"

"Oh, well, if you have all night."

"Really, that bad?"

"Sweetie, you have to understand that Charon is very distant. He's a little messed up over the years. I don't know the history of his contract but I know he's completely loyal to whoever holds it. I'm very certain that if you have his contract, and you try very hard, you can maybe get him to open up."

"He sounds horrifying."

"I might also add that he's very large."

I leaned in closer to whisper. "Do you ever wonder about... you know..."

She looked stunned. "Sweetie, you'll be lucky if you can even hold a conversation with him."

"There's not much conversation in that kind of business."

"Oh my. I like you. You're not a prude. You're funny."

"I like you, too. You're very kind. Well, it was really nice talking with you, Tulip, but I have a Goliath to pick up."

"Bye, come back soon."

"Bye, I will."