Disclaimer: I do not own or make any money from Blue Bloods or the use of their characters. I am still feeling like I am struggling with this story. Please send along any prompts or ideas you might have for the characters and I will fit it into the basic structure I have for this piece.

Chapter Six

"I wish I could have seen the look on his face!" Eddie laughed taking a long drag of her beer. She'd met up with Jamie and Kara after tour and listened with interest as they relayed the story of how they had gotten even with Detective Hoffman.

"He turned red as a beet," Kara relayed. "I thought we were actually going to steal the collar and process him ourselves, but I think this was better. The entire squad room was cheering."

Eddie smiled at Jamie, "How did you manage to pull that off?

"Erin got me the warrant and we did the rest," Jamie replied. "I think he'll think twice before poaching another cop's collar in the future."

"You two want more beer?" Kara asked. "I'll buy this time."

Kara went to get another pitcher of beer, Jamie slid his arm around Eddie's shoulders dropping a kiss on her head. "Thank you, you gave me the idea to get even with this guy."

"You came up with the idea," Eddie replied. "I just gave you the push."

"How was your tour?" he asked. Eddie hadn't been talking about the job very often lately.

"It was fine, today was rough. Reynolds, he is just such an insensitive jerk. We had this accident today where they had to cut the woman out of the car. All the while FDNY was doing it, he was taking bets on how many firemen it would take to lift her out. She as a pretty big girl, but she was actually hurt really bad."

Jamie took a bite of his pickle. "Well, you just have to be more sensitive to the people you're trying to help. If he has your back honey, then it's okay by me. Still if you want to request a new partner…" Eddie stiffened just at the though.

"What?" Jamie asked, highly attentive to her body language.

"The devil you know that's all," Eddie replied as Kara returned with the beer.

Eddie turned on a fake smile and didn't say another word about changing partners until she and Jamie were back at his place.

"You're frightened you might get paired up with that new transfer. What's his name?" he asked.

"Uh, it's Casey, Thomas Casey," Eddie replied. "And yes, I just don't like him, Jamie. I can't explain it, he just creeps me out. If I get paired up with him…I'll tough it out…"

"No, honey," Jamie said. "I know I said that but if you don't feel safe with your partner I don't want you getting into the car with him. You go right to Renzulli and tell him you're sick, then I'll do whatever I have to do…"

"No, Jamie, you won't. You won't use a hook for me, you understand? I won't have them thinking I run to my PC's son boyfriend for everything."

Jamie flopped on the couch, "Forget it, then. I'm trying to help you. I'm scared to death every time you get into the squad car because I don't trust Reynolds."

Eddie was changing her clothing as she argued with him. "So, what do you want me to do?" she asked. "Quit?"

"No," Jamie replied. "You're the job, just like me. I'd never ask you to quit. I just want you to be careful and to remember everything I taught you. I don't want anything to happen to you."

Eddie was in her nightgown now, she sat down on the couch with him. "I know. When I saw you come home the other night with stitches it scared me. We are both in such dangerous jobs, I know we each felt better when we rode together. Do you want to go back to that? Do you want change…?"

Jamie leaned over and kissed her deeply, holding onto her to him with a force that he'd never shown before in their relationship. As things started to progress, Jamie laid on top of Eddie on the sofa. His hands roamed around her body pulling at her clothing with a hunger he never felt before even with Sydney or Dana. "Eddie," he sighed against her mouth not realizing, at first, she had stopped participating.

Seconds later for Jamie and eons later for Eddie, she began to push at his chest. "Stop it…stop…"

The word registered quickly and Jamie did stop. Eddie was still trying to fight him off, "Stop…I don't want to."

Jamie sat up, "Okay, hey…look at me. It's okay, I stopped. We don't have to do anything you don't want to do."

Eddie sat up next to him, tears streaming down her cheeks. "Jamie, I'm sorry…I'm sorry…" She tried to get up and run from him but was shaking too much to achieve that goal. She tripped and fell onto the floor.

Jamie didn't know if he should try to hold her or give her space. He chose space. "It's all right, Eddie. Don't run from me. Come sit with me, talk to me please."

Slowly, Eddie got up and went to sit on the couch. She was crying but Jamie was afraid to try to touch her. "I'm sorry, Eddie. I'm so sorry. I got carried away, I didn't think."

"It's not your fault," she sobbed. "I'm so screwed up I can't even let you love me like you want to…I'm sorry Jamie. I can't do this, you don't deserve this. I want to go home. Please, can I go home?"

Jamie took a deep breath. "Eddie, look at me." He reached out gently and raised her chin to make her look at him. "If you want to go home to your apartment, you can. I will never force you to do anything. I will never force myself on you. I love you so much, Eddie. I am so sorry I scared you. I promise you I will never do that again."

"Jamie, I don't know what I'm doing," Eddie sighed. "I was scared of you, Jamie. And I don't understand why…" She started to cry again and reached out so she could be held. Jamie was more than happy to oblige her. He gathered her close, keeping his hold light and gentle.

"Ssh," he cooed to her. "Ssh, I'm here baby…you're going to be okay. We'll figure this out."

"I don't really want to go home," Eddie confessed. "I love being here with you. Waking up in your arms and going to sleep feeling safe. I just…there's something wrong with me, Jamie."

"Eddie, the department has a very good crisis counselor. Her name is Grace, they call her Amazing Grace because she really is amazing. This sounds like a form of PTSD. It's something that maybe did happen to you or to someone you know and it scared you so badly you buried it. What do you think about me asking my Dad to help set this up in secret?" Jamie made sure he kept his voice soft and low.

"No," Eddie replied. "No, I don't want that. I don't know what I want."

Jamie sighed with her in his arms, "Okay, we don't have anything you don't want to do. I promise you Eddie, no matter what is happening or what happens in the future, I'm in. I am all in."

She sniffled and pulled back, "Me too…I'm sorry I freaked out. I love it when we are together, you're the best lover I've ever had because you really care about me."

"I do more than that, Eddie. Let's go to bed, get some rest. We will deal with our fears about the job day by day. I can work through my worries about you riding with someone else, all right? As long as we come home to each other at the end of the day, I can adapt to anything." Jamie said all of this snuggling her against his chest.

She pulled back, "You ready for bed now?" She smiled at him. "I think we should try again. It was really feeling good until I freaked out."

"If you are ready, sure we can," Jamie agreed standing up and taking her hand. "If you're not, that's okay too."

Eddie slid her arms around his waist, "How did I get so lucky?"

Jamie smiled, "I ask myself the same thing every day."

Hand in hand they walked to the bedroom. While Jamie showered Eddie brushed her hair and turned down their bed. When Jamie came out of the shower he found Eddie standing in the middle of the bedroom, her night gown discarded on the bed, blonde hair flowing down her shoulders. He didn't need any other invitation.

As they lay in the afterglow, entangled in one another's arms, she whispered against his chest, "I love you, Jamie. I don't ever want to sleep without you again."

Jamie rubbed her arm absentmindedly, "What are you saying Eddie?"

"I want to move in together, all the way. No more running, no more hiding, just us, together."

Jamie's face lit up with a smile, "I like the sound of that."

Eddie sighed, "Good, me too."

As they fell asleep each dreamt of their future together, a life and a family was something Eddie never thought she would have, never through she deserved, she'd been told that long enough. Lying here in Jamie's arms she thought maybe, just maybe she did deserve it and even more, that she could have it. That night, her dreams were happy.