Hi guys, still posting - not sure whether to continue though, haven't had any incentive to continue since I started reposting. Let me know x
Chapter 37
"I told you she didn't know!" Tom exclaimed suddenly.
"Didn't know what exactly?" I raised an eyebrow, my eyes shifting to Dougie who's face broke in to a broad grin.
"You're... You're already pregnant." He stammered.
Thing's suddenly seem a lot more real now he's told me that.
I feel tears welling up.
I'm not sure why.
Am I happy, or am I disappointed in myself?
"Dad doesn't want me anymore does he?" I mumbled.
Both men looked a little taken aback my unrelated comment.
"He hasn't spoken in a week. Since you were brought in. He's been in here every day though." Tom tried to smile, patting my shoulder reassuringly. "Your mum was in yesterday with him."
"He won't be in again." I stated. "I'm awake now, he can't feel guilty 'cause I'm unconscious."
"Brenna, your dad loves you!" Tom exclaimed.
"He hates me." I whispered, finally allowing myself to cry. I felt a dip in the bed as Dougie sat on the edge, pulling me in to his embrace, lacing his arms around me. "I'm going to lose him all over again. It's all my fault."
"Umm.. Everything's ready for the scan.." A nurse appeared at the doorway, pulling a wheel chair in to the room. She smiled and pushed it next to my bed.
"What scan?" I asked as I was helped in to the chair by Dougie and Tom, both escorting me out of the private ward I'd been placed on and up the corridor.
"Ultrasound." Tom answered.
Dougie was silent, biting the inside of his mouth.
What is he so nervous about?
"Doug, I'm not going to go psycho if you don't want to do this." I said, looking straight ahead of me.
The chair stopped moving and Dougie knelt in front of me.
"Stop telling me what I do and don't want." He said. "Because I know exactly what I want."
"And what's that?" I asked.
"You. Preferably in the big pink bow you refused to wear for Christmas." he laughed. "I want our baby to be the most sh!t hot kid in the world. I want her to be a heartbreaker like her mum, or one hot f*ck like his dad. Now do you believe me?"
Well, with that speech, who can try and disagree?
"So, how far gone-" Tom began to ask, it seemed he'd waited whilst me and Doug had been in the scan.
"Eight weeks." I replied.
"And are you-"
"Yes, we're keeping it." Dougie said.
"And when are you going to. -"
"Don't know. He doesn't want to know me anyway." I grumbled.
"Oh." It seemed we'd taken the words right out of Tom's mouth.
Literally.
"Brenna, you might want to think before going in there." He called after me as I stumbled towards my private room, fingers clasping the door handle before turning it in my hands, looking at Tom as I walked in side. I glanced in to the room, stopping dead upon entry.
"Hi." Dad mumbled, waving feebly.
Oh.
Great.
Just what the doctor ordered.
A Nice dose of guilt.
This is going to be cheery.
"I did call, but they said you were at an appointment." He said, looking down in to his hands, twiddling his thumbs. He sighed deeply, glancing up at me once more. "Your mum wanted to come, but Elijah's got a bug."
"Then why did you come?" I asked. "I don't really want an argument."
"I'm not here for an argument." He frowned, raising his voice slightly, hunching over and folding his arms, now who's the teenager...
Sure.
No arguments...
"We need to talk this through." Dougie spoke from behind me.
"I want to talk with my daughter alone, if you don't mind." Dad grimaced, a frosty glare penetrating Dougie's own.
"Doug, back off." I whispered. "I don't want him breaking your nose again."
"So. Talk." Dad stated as I climbed on to my bed. He leant back in to the chair beside it and crossed his one leg over the other. "I want to know everything."
"Everything?" I snorted.
I simply received a glare.
Okay, maybe now isn't the best time to try and pull a joke.
He's looking pretty narked.
Well, I guess that's to be expected.
"Is it serious?" He asked.
I nodded.
"Have you..." He stammered.
"Dad!" I exclaimed blushing.
"I just want to know.."
"No you don't!" I could feel my cheeks heating up again.
I think I'm on fire.
"Was it safe?"
"DAD!" I hissed.
"I don't want you ending up like your mum did." He scorned.
"Oh yes, because that was a terrible thing, wasn't it?" I snapped.
"I didn't mean it like that." He exclaimed.
"Sure you didn't." I rolled my eyes, falling back on to the bed, lying down on my back. "And it doesn't seem to count that Dougie is around. Because you weren't."
"That wasn't my fault!" He yelled.
"You said you wouldn't argue." I closed my eyes and turned over, away from him.
"He's almost my age!" He roared.
"You're not exactly in your mid fifties." I started picking at the threads on the bed sheets.
"You're not exactly old enough to know what you're doing." Dad snarled.
"Oh, yeah. That's rich. Tell me, how old were you when you knocked mum up?" I sat up, blinking back fresh tears.
"Well, maybe if I could go back, I'd change that wouldn't I?" He snapped.
"Get out." I mumbled. "Get the f*ck out of my room!"
I can't believe..
Did he really say that?
Dad looked at me blankly.
Watching me as I curled up against the bed.
"Leave me alone!" I whispered.
Instead, he pulled his chair closer to the bed.
Men.
They don't know how to follow instructions.
Tw*ts.
I watched as he let his head fall in to his hands. His fingers running through his hair. Tangled. Odd. He usually suffocates it in gel. "I didn't mean to say that." He mumbled. "God, why did I say that?"
"You did mean it." I croaked, my heart thumping against my chest. So hard, it hurts.
It hurts so much.
"I didn't!" He sobbed.
Sobbed?
I glanced back at him again, wiping away his tears.
"Then why say it?" I whispered.
"I was angry. I still am angry. He is my best friend. You are my daughter. They don't mix." He stated. I could sense the frustration in each syllable he uttered, his tone lacking any other emotion.
"I didn't mean it to happen." I said, turning my entire body to face him, sitting up and crossing my legs.
"But.. How?" His face was turning that red again. "What happened to make you do this?"
"Nothing made me do it, Dad. I...I just...At first I thought it was fun. It was risky. An adrenaline rush. And then one day it just changed. It changed in to something so much more." I spoke. I was really feeling what I was saying. I couldn't help myself now. Two years of secrets just came pouring out. "I initiated it. I kissed him first. I...I wont give him up. Please don't make me."
It was then that dad made eye contact.
And I mean eye contact.
I mean no blinking.
Jeez.
Talk about intimidation.
He frowned.
Wow.
That's where I get that from.
What a glare.
He stole my glare!
My Death Glare!
Rude!
"But... he's.. he's Dougie!" Dad exclaimed. "He's... weird."
"I know." I beamed.
And here comes that silence again.
"Does your head hurt?" Dad asked.
Well now, look who's avoiding the subject.
"Well, apparently it collided with a table, and then a floor." I said. "So, considering it's still in one piece I'm trying to ignore the pain and be thankful my brain didn't spill."
"Oh." He looked to his hands again.
If he didn't stop twiddling with his fingers I was going to chop them off.
Only I'm allowed to fidget.
Jeez.
He's stealing all my moves.
He's using the guilt trip on me.
My own guilt trip is being used against me.
Plagiarism!
Using my work!
My masterpiece.
"Sorry about that." He said. "I thought you were Tom. I was only trying to protect you."
"Oh Shut up. Please." My voice wavered.
Oh you turd!
How dare you make me feel bad.
Oh ...
Poop.
"I thought he was just being Doug. Taking advantage. I had no idea you'd been doing this for so long. Two years and you didn't tell me. You kept this from everyone." He was on the brink of crying again. We must have looked a right pair. Crying at each other. "Well, I mean, I know you told Tom something when you were in hospital, I had no idea it was about Doug-"
He cut himself off mid sentence.
"What?" I asked.
I don't think I should have inquired to be honest.
"He knocked you up!?" He roared.
Oh dear.
"But I miscarriaged." I stated, swallowing hard.
"But you were seventeen!"