Disclaimer: I do not own One Tree Hill or any of its characters.

A/N: Hey guys. Back with another chapter. Hope you all enjoy it. I want to thank, as always, all the readers, and all you reviewers, you're the best. I'm sure most of you will notice that some of the Dan/Deb bit comes directly from the show.

Hey sis: There ya go. It's up so you can stop checking for an update now. LOL. Love ya and see ya soon.

"Umm, well," Rachel replied on the other end. "I'm pretty sure that statement was self-explanatory. But if you really need me to say it again, here goes. Hmm, let's see – you kissed him the night Brooke had her allergy attack and then told him you were really over, you went to bat for him with that whole assignment mess up, chit chat with him on the phone, joke around with him at school, then blow him off when he gets too close. Brooke, Bevin and I definitely interrupted some heavy eye sex at your house last week, probably more seeing as he was shirtless when we got there. You went to see him in prison and stayed for hours and then totally snubbed him at school the next week. You got mad jealous over a rumored hook-up." Rachel paused to take a breath, wondering why her friend hadn't yet cut her off defensively. "Those are just a few examples, but do you need me to go on or have I answered your question?"

Peyton closed her eyes as she took in everything Rachel was saying. When she laid it out like that, she had to admit the truth of it. No, she wasn't 'playing' Nathan, at least not in the true sense of the word. She hadn't schemed and planned ways to toy with his emotions and keep him running after her. But her own jumbled emotions, along with an admittedly selfish desire for Nathan's continued interest, had led her to behave as such and she could see how it might appear as though she'd set out to do just that. In the end, whether she'd done it deliberately or inadvertently was of little importance. It had had the same result – it had hurt Nathan. Yes, he'd stolen her heart and pretty much stomped all over it, but he was right about what he'd said last night. She'd hurt him too.

"Peyton?" Rachel called out, reminding her she was still on the phone.

"Hey, umm, no, I don't need to hear any more," she replied. "Listen, I gotta go, ok."

"Wait. Are you ok?"

"Yeah. Just…in need of a reality check, I guess. Thanks."

"Anytime."

Peyton hung up the phone and paced her room again, her mind racing as it began the slow process of acknowledging the mistakes she'd made with Nathan, particularly in the weeks since their breakup. While she could honestly say that she hadn't meant to hurt him with her indecisiveness, she couldn't say the same of the words she'd spewed out in anger last night. Those stones had been directly aimed at his heart. She'd outright told him that her purpose was to get back at him – that her sketch and her actions had been payback. What was wrong with her?

The worst part of it – he believed her.

Just as the overwhelming guilt threatened to wash over her, a vivid image of Nathan with Ashley implanted itself into her memory. Anger instantly consumed her. Ok, maybe it shouldn't bother her, but it did just the same. He'd said Ashley was a rumor, that he hadn't touched her. Well, if that was true prior to last night, then apparently he'd decided to turn that rumor into reality.

She closed her eyes in anguish. How could he have stood there in that driveway, talking about how she'd hurt him, and then, without hesitation, run into someone else's arms? How could he kiss the lips of another girl after kissing hers just moments before? And she was willing to bet that it had gone beyond making out.

Brooke would say he was burying the pain in the physical pleasure, that he was emotionally detached to every girl but Peyton. Brooke understood that aspect of him because she did the same with boys. But Peyton couldn't relate. She could understand pain but couldn't see how heartache could be wiped away with an orgasm.

She shut her eyes tighter and tried to push the thought away. What did it matter anyway? Her and Nathan were over. He'd officially given up.

And that, more than anything else, was tearing her apart. She had no idea where to go from here.

As though to relieve itself from intense turmoil, her mind automatically took her back to a better time, just four months ago. As she drifted off to sleep, a smile tugged at the corners of her mouth at the pleasant memory that played itself out in her head.

Flashback

"Ok, so, you're not gonna like this," Nathan said apologetically as he strode into her room on a late Saturday afternoon.

"What?" she questioned with narrowed eyes. "Please don't say you're canceling tonight."

He sighed before speaking again. "Just dinner. We can probably still hit the theatre on time."

"Nathan, why?" she asked in disappointment. "We never go out for dinner anymore and I was looking forward to trying that new restaurant."

"I know, babe. So was I. But my dad wants me to go down to the dealership and wash all the cars," he grumbled in complaint. "Apparently they're getting dingy and that's not a good Scott Motor's look."

"But we had plans."

"I told him that and, I swear I offered to do it next weekend instead but he said it has to get done today because there's some big buyers or something coming in next week. I'm really sorry, Peyton. Are you mad?"

"Yeah," she replied crossing her arms angrily. "At your dad," she added when Nathan bowed his head. "Why can't he do it himself if he's in such a hurry?"

Nathan chuckled at the very response he'd had. "That's what I said," he admitted. "You can imagine how well that went over."

"Ok, well, this doesn't have to ruin our night," she spoke optimistically. "I mean, how long could it possibly to take to wash a couple of cars?"

He threw her an incredulous look. A couple of cars? "Try a couple hundred. It's gonna take hours, especially since my dad doesn't even want me to start until closing at 5:00."

"And you can't say no?"

"To my dad? You want me to see my eighteenth birthday?"

"As of right now, yes, but ask me again closer to that time and I may have a different answer."

"Very funny."

"Come on, chin up, dude," she said. "So your dad put you to work. It won't be that bad," she said, wrapping her arms around him and placing a soft kiss to his lips.

He smiled down at her as his arms came around her waist. He honestly didn't mind doing the work. It was only Peyton's reaction to another cancelled date that he'd dreaded. "And here I thought I'd have to cheer you up."

She shrugged in his arms. "It does suck, but there's no sense moaning and groaning about it, right?"

"Right," he agreed with a smirk. "I can think of way better things to moan and groan about."

"As can I," she whispered huskily against his neck, giggling when the gesture instantly elicited that very response from her boyfriend. She pulled back, still wearing a smile, always amused at how easily and quickly he was turned on. "But back on topic," she said firmly, bringing forth an entirely different kind of grunt out of Nathan. "I'm sure if we keep working straight through and don't take any breaks…"

"We?" he cut her off to ask. "You're gonna help me?"

She shrugged her shoulders. "I was thinking about it," she teased lightly.

He shook his head. "I don't want you to have to take time out of your weekend for this."

"Baby, it's not that big a deal. And it'll go twice as fast with both of us doing it."

"I know, but…"

"But what?" she asked sharply, pulling out of his embrace, her suspicions on high alert. Did he really have to go to the dealership or was that just the excuse he'd come up with to blow off their date? And what would he actually be doing?

"It's not fair to you," he replied. "Why should you have to do work for my dad?"

"It wouldn't be for him," she responded snidely. "But fine, if you don't want my help, then whatever."

He sighed at her angry tone. "Babe, don't be like that. If you really want to help me that bad, you know I'm not gonna stop you."

That simple statement made her smile because, to her, it said so much and it completely quashed her suspicions. He really was working for his father today and he really did just think it was unfair to drag her into it. Man, was she glad she hadn't gone off on a huge tangent. "But do you want me to?" she asked him softly.

He gave her a small smile before shrugging his shoulders and admitting that he did. It was a gesture she would have found beyond adorable if she weren't so annoyed that, after eight months of dating, he still couldn't, or rather wouldn't, come out and ask her for help when he wanted it.

She nodded her head. "Ok, I'll go change."

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Nathan was hosing down the third vehicle from his selected row when, all of a sudden, a surge of water came at him, soaking him to the bone. He let out a holler before glancing up and finding Peyton, her own hose pointing directly at him, smiling wickedly.

She ran the other direction when he lifted his hose toward her with a playful threat of making her pay for that. He caught up to her easily enough, following through on his threat, despite her fit of giggles and screams.

"Ok, ok, stop," she pleaded between breaths.

He refused to do so until she apologized and agreed to be at his mercy for the next week. It took some convincing and by the time she agreed, she was drenched from head to toe.

"You're such a jackass," she said, though the smile on her face clearly indicated she was joking.

He chuckled as she wiped away water that had dripped to her face. "You started it," he pointed out.

"Oh, very mature, Scott," she scoffed.

"Well, you did," he stressed.

"You're just lucky I'm not wearing white."

"How does that make me lucky?"

She rolled her eyes at the question. "Because if I were, you'd never get any work done."

"True," he admitted. "But that would actually suck more for you since you'd have to do it all."

"Yeah, like that's gonna happen."

"It could," he said. "In fact, I could make you do it all anyway."

She laughed and folded her arms over her chest. "Ok, I gotta hear this one."

"You're at my mercy for the next week, remember? That means you have to do everything I want, no question, no argument."

She quirked an eyebrow in sheer amusement. "And what you want is to have me wash cars?" she teased.

"Among other things," he stated suggestively. "What's so funny?" he asked when she chuckled and shook her head.

" I just can't believe you fell for my phony surrender. I never took you as the gullible type before."

"Oh, I don't think so," he replied with feigned indignity. "You made the deal so it's sealed."

"Says who?" she challenged.

"Says…everyone."

"Everyone, wow," she mocked.

"Everybody knows a mercy promise can't be broken."

"It can if you had your fingers crossed when you made it, which I so did."

"Very mature, Sawyer," he repeated the words she'd thrown at him just moments before.

"I learned from the best."

"Damn, that Brooke's a bad influence, isn't she?"

Again she rolled her eyes and then set out to return to the task at hand. Her steps halted when Nathan pulled off his soaked T-shirt and tossed it to the ground beside the cooler they'd packed with sodas and snacks.

"Ok, that is so not fair that you get to do that."

"You can do it too," he told her. "That is, if you don't mind all the traffic getting backed up because of all the perverts slowing down to sneak a peek," he added, gesturing to the road where several cars were driving past.

"You know, that would probably bother you more than it would me," she teased lightly.

He just smiled at her because she was right.

"So, in that case," she continued. "I think you should have to put your shirt back on. Just to keep things fair."

"Why?" he asked. "So all this hotness doesn't distract you from your work?"

"Maybe."

"Scared I'm gonna get you even wetter than I already have?"

A hearty laugh escaped her lips. "What if I said that was impossible?"

His brows lifted as his eyes bore into hers. "Meaning what? That I couldn't do it or that you're already there?"

"Now why does it have to be either or?" she questioned provocatively. "Maybe it's one because of the other."

He cursed under his breath as his body instantly stirred. "Stop it," he managed to croak.

"Stop what?" she asked innocently. "All I'm saying is…"

"Yeah, I know what you're saying," he interrupted. "Now stop it before I toss you into one of these back seats and make you finish what you're trying to start."

Her eyes sparkling, she went on. "Oh, such a big talker," she commented playfully. "Care to make good on that threat?"

"You know it," he responded, dropping his water hose at his side and taking the few steps that separated them.

Her plan to really hose him down once he'd let go of his 'weapon' was all but forgotten when he touched her and pulled her in for a kiss.

His hand reached behind her for the door handle of the car she was leaning on. "Fuck," he muttered irritably, his shoulders slumping.

"What? What's wrong?" she asked worriedly.

"It's fucking locked."

At first she just stared at him, equally disappointed, and then they both erupted into laughter because it was something, if not for their raging hormones, that they really should have guessed. Of course the cars would be locked.

Nathan turned away from Peyton. "Well, I guess it's back to work."

"Yeah, I guess so," she agreed. "Hey," she called to him. "Put your shirt on. You're stopping traffic."

End of Flashback

–––––––––––––––––––––––––

"Still not home," Deb said the next day when Dan stepped into the kitchen.

"He will be," Dan repeated what he'd been telling her all day.

"When? It's nearly dinnertime. And this is twice in a row that he stays out all night. I cannot believe that you let him get away with this."

"He's seventeen, Deb, not five."

"All the more reason to set some guidelines. That's just the age to get in all sorts of trouble. Need I remind you of that?"

"He's a good kid," Dan defended.

"Is he? Because that tape I watched states otherwise," Deb said pointedly. "Have you even talked to him about that? Or have you been too busy fueling his hatred for his own brother?"

"I didn't encourage that beating if that's what you're insinuating," Dan stated. "Nathan has his own reasons for hating Lucas that have nothing to do with me."

"Nothing to do with you?" she asked incredulously. "You've been pitting him against Lucas since he was a child hanging on your every word."

Dan shook his head, trying to control his anger. "You really want to play the blame game? At least I've been here for him every day of his life. Maybe if you cared to spend more time at home…"

"Oh, not this again," Deb said with frustration.

"Even when you are home, you work 'til all hours," Dan continued.

"And you want to know why, Dan?" she said. "Let me tell you. Because ever since you started this basketball thing, I feel like you've slowly been stealing him from me. You've made me feel irrelevant. I go out and I raise money for good causes and I matter out there. But at home you shut me out of his life."

"Shut you out?" Dan sneered. "Work has always come first with you."

"That is not fair. You know how hard I've tried to balance both."

"Really? Because it feels like the scale's tipping more toward work these days."

"Lately, yes, and I've explained why. But I swear to God, I never would have done it if I knew how he'd turn out."

"He's a good kid," Dan repeated.

"Based on what? His scoring average? Have you even watched that tape?"

Dan growled in aggravation. "This is just like you, to take one thing and blow it out of proportion. Yes, I watched it. Not that I needed to since Nathan had already told me about it. He made a mistake – he got angry, he reacted. Period. He's got a court date next month where he'll face the consequences. Why do you insist on dwelling on it?"

She opened her mouth to reply but closed it as Nathan came through the front door. Sheer relief swept over her until she took notice of the giggling, scantily dressed brunette clinging to his side. Her lips twisted into a sardonic smile when Nathan directed the girl toward the staircase. "Oh, no, no, no," she said with a bitter laugh. She was not having this. Staying out all night was bad enough, but this? No. "Don't even think about it, mister."

Nathan barely spared her a glance before proceeding to walk past her and up the stairs.

"Nathan!" Deb shouted after him. "I mean it! Get down here, right now!" She was aware of how incredibly desperate she must sound but that's exactly what she was. Desperate. For her son to hear her.

Nathan ignored her, only stopping his upward climb once Dan called his name. He sighed and turned around.

"Your mother was speaking to you," he said sternly, yet needlessly, since Nathan had obviously heard her. "You," he said to the girl. "Out," he commanded with a head motion toward the door.

Nathan rolled his eyes, but the girl did as she was told.

"Now you can go up," Dan said once his 'friend' had gone.

Sneering in annoyance, Nathan spat, "Thanks a lot, Mom," before heading to his room.

"You let him bring... floozies... to his bedroom too?" she asked her husband with agitation. The fact that Nathan had blamed her, and not Dan, indicated that he generally allowed it. "Is there anything you don't let him do?"

Dan just shrugged carelessly. "He's gonna do what he's gonna do, Deb, whether it's here or some place else. At least when it's here, we know where he is."

"That's the only upside of it, but definitely not ideal."

"Hey, you wanted him home, he's home," Dan replied and then left the room.

Once alone, Deb heaved a deep sigh as she reached into her purse for her pill bottle. The way things were going around here, she needed it.

–––––––––––––––––––––––––

Peyton walked in the school Monday morning, dead set on finding Nathan and giving him a proper apology for the sketch, her behavior as of late, and for lying to him about her reasons for said behavior. She refused to take responsibility for his cheating ways, as he so suggested, but she would accept the blame where it was due. Much soul searching, along with a little nudge from Rachel, had led her to conclude that her actions in the weeks since their breakup, hadn't been fair to Nathan. She had to be honest with herself. She'd never truly wanted to let him go no matter how much she told herself and others that she did. And she'd certainly never wanted or expected him to let her go.

She still didn't, yet knew she should – they never got it right in all the times they'd tried – and it just wasn't fair to string Nathan along through all her uncertainty, regardless of how badly he'd treated her. Maybe someday she'd get her head on straight and figure out which direction to take, but until then, while her heart and mind continued to battle, she knew she had to let Nathan go. Or at least let him believe she had.

But first her apology.

She nearly lost her courage when she approached Nathan's locker and found him flirting with a few of the cheerleaders from her squad. She had to remind herself that she had no right to be upset about that. But, of course, that reminder didn't stop her from feeling it just the same.

Taking a deep, calming breath, she forced her legs to carry her toward him. "Hey," she said when she stood face to face with him, her voice almost failing her as she caught a glimpse of the large hickey on his neck. "You got a second?"

Nathan's heart pounded heavily in his chest and he silently cursed the curly blonde for still having that effect on him when what he really wanted to do was hate her. The fact that he couldn't and that she'd stayed on his mind the entire weekend, no matter what action he took to wipe her out, increased his anger ten-fold. That very rage is what prompted his cold response. "Not really. I'm kinda busy."

She looked down at the floor to hide her disappointment and hurt. "Right, ok," she said with a sad nod.

"Hey," he called out when she started walking away.

She turned, hope filling her that he'd decided to hear her out. "Yeah?"

"The rumors? They're true this time."

She felt her stomach almost literally plummet to the floor. She closed her eyes, fighting back tears, before saying, "I figured as much."

He watched her all the way down the hall until she disappeared. When the girls went back to their flirting, he irritably brushed them off and headed down to the gym to blow off some steam.

––––––––––

Peyton ran into Lucas and Haley in the corridor and they showed immediate concern toward the fallen expression on her face. However she assured them she was fine. They clearly didn't buy it, but they did drop it.

Not so for Brooke whom she met up with shortly after. She'd tried to play if off as nothing, but Brooke pulled her into the girls' bathroom and cornered her.

"P. Sawyer, talk to me," she said. "What is it?"

"It's Nathan," Peyton replied, knowing she couldn't hide anything from Brooke. "He hates me and I don't blame him."

"He doesn't hate you, hon," Brooke stated knowingly.

"Yes, he does and it all started because of this stupid sketch I drew…"

"The Highschool Fearleader," Brooke filled in, looking somewhat upset.

"He told you?"

Brooke shook her head. "No. I recognize your work, Peyton," she spoke softly. "I'd have to be a pretty crappy best friend not to."

"Like me?"

The brunette didn't respond, telling Peyton that she was upset about the drawing too. And yet, here she was still offering comfort and a shoulder to lean on. Peyton didn't think she'd ever felt more admiration for Brooke or shame for herself than in that very moment.

"Brooke, I'm sorry," Peyton said earnestly. "I know it was insulting…"

"Yeah, it was," Brooke agreed.

"Brooke…"

"Look, Peyton, I know you're going through a lot right now with Nathan and your birth mother and everything, and I'm here for you. I am. But here's the thing. If you really hate it that much, then just quit the cheering squad. Don't drag the rest of us through the mud."

"But I don't hate it," Peyton said. "Me and you, we've been cheering together forever. It's our thing. You know?"

"Yeah, I know. But then, why, Peyton?"

Peyton sighed deeply before answering. "Mostly because I was mad at Nathan, but also because I just get tired of it all sometimes – the whole stigma attached to cheerleaders. We all put up this front like we're these super happy people 24-7 and that's just not true. We're real people, with real lives and feelings and problems." She paused a moment and then added. "And people just don't see that."

"Those who count do," Brooke said reassuringly. "And the others, screw them."

Peyton giggled at the comment. "So, you're not mad at me?"

"Hmm, I'm over it," Brooke replied. "Now what about Nate?"

"He's…not over it," Peyton responded before launching into the whole sordid story.