A/N: This chapter ended up being WAY longer than I intended, which is why it took so long to churn out. Apologies for the wait-if it's any consolation, tomorrow's chapter is already written?
AND OH MY GOD SPATIALHEATHER DREW CITRINE GO LOOK AT IT RIGHT NOW SHE'S THE CUTEST DAMN THING (theladyforester [PERIOD] tumblr [DOTCOM] /search/ united+I+stand+fanart). As always, replace the [PERIOD]'s with the actual punctuation, and take out the spaces, and you should be fine :D
One last thing: feel free to wag a virtual finger at me for the end of this chapter. I debated leaving it out, because oh my god, what sort of creature have I become, but then I convinced myself, "Nah. They'll love it!" You'll see what I mean. ;P
"It's just a check-in meeting," Sapphire says, her voice even and calm. "Everything will be fine."
"Yes," Ruby says.
"You're just giving the report. You've done this before. This will all be over by the end of the day, and things will be fine."
"Yup."
Sapphire presses her lips together and frowns. "How are you so confident?"
"Because if you say everything will turn out fine, then it will." Ruby shrugs as if to say 'can't argue with that logic'.
"Yes, but you know that anything I predict is never certain. There are always possibilities—"
"Look, Sapph, if I've learned anything about your future vision in the last six months, it's exactly how reliable it can be. And if I know anything about you, you scoured every possibility and probability for this meeting twice before you actually answered any of my questions about it." Ruby smiles. "It's hard to be scared when you already know what's coming, right?"
She says it, and she sounds confident enough, but Sapphire can feel that her own anxiety is rubbing off on the red gem. Ruby's smile is quirky, a little too toothy to be fully relaxed.
"Remember." Sapphire has said it before, but she feels the need to say it again, for both their sakes. "The pivotal moment is the conclusion. Everything hinges on the way you phrase your final assessment of the situation."
"And how I bring up the fact that, whoopsie, I've read all your most recent correspondences these last six months and can now never be sent to the surface."
Sapphire knows that's a joke fueled by nerves. She knows that, because that's what Ruby does, and yet… "Just one instance is enough," she says, gripping fat handfuls of her petticoats in her fists. "It was an accident. I slipped. If you blame me, then everything should go smoother for you."
There is a very fine line for Ruby to toe during this conversation. She needs to be too tainted with forbidden knowledge to be set free on the surface, but also not so tainted that it would make tactical sense to dispose of her. She also needs to be seen as an invaluable asset for keeping Sapphire's chaos-inducing tendencies contained and docile. If there is any indication that Sapphire could be fine without her, then there will be more severe consequences for Sapphire infecting her with the wrong knowledge.
"I know, Sapphire. How many times have we gone through this?" Ruby takes a hold of her hands and works her fingers out of their clenching hold on the fabric of her dress. "We know what to do, and you already know everything is going to work itself out. I'm just going to make it a reality."
That conversation took place hours ago. Ruby has been gone for five hours. Nearly six, now. Sapphire spins her chair around so she can look at the rest of the room and brings her knees up to her chin without a care for all of the petticoats that poof up in between.
This is the longest Sapphire has been alone in centuries.
The concept isn't something she's put too much thought into, to be honest. Especially recently, when Ruby's company has been voluntary as well as conveniently mandatory. But it's true. Sapphire has her moments of meditation to answer the Diamonds' questions, moments in which she ignores Ruby and vice versa; they have quiet moments too, moments in which they do not speak or truly interact with each other, but none of these are moments of true solitude. When you occupy forty-nine square feet with someone else twenty hours of each day, for decades on end, solitude becomes an abstraction that folds in on itself again and again until it warps and ultimately disappears. You try to find ways to redefine it so suit your situation until, eventually, it just stops mattering anymore.
If this is solitude, Sapphire thinks, then I don't want it.
She can't concentrate in the stillness of the little room. The silence is too loud. She needs Ruby's shuffling footsteps, her soft grunts and whooshes of air as she practices with her boxing gloves, the bright spot of warmth that Sapphire can always feel just over her shoulder.
She used to be so contented with aloneness. It was, after all, how she used to spend most of her time. It used to be that she only interacted with Ruby and their friends four hours of every day. It used to be that Sapphire didn't even notice the stagnant silence in this room.
Now there is a scream boiling like poison in the back of her throat. How had she ever tolerated such a miserable existence?
Because, until Ruby, she had never experienced the alternative. How do you recognize loneliness if you've never felt the fulfillment of companionship? It's so easy to assume that the way you feel is normal when it's the only thing you've ever known.
Sapphire can't concentrate on any of the Diamonds' ten questions in her inbox right now. That being said, it's only too easy for her to watch what is happening to Ruby. She tries to curb her vision as close to what is presently happening as she can, so she can feel as if she is there with Ruby as much as for accuracy, but she will always be about forty-five seconds ahead. Such is the nature of the beast.
The formal director of Sapphire's operation is White Diamond. As such, the gem herself is present. However, very high ranking representatives from the other diamonds are also present. Their function is mostly to demonstrate unanimity as a governing force—see, if all of us are seem to be here then it must mean that we can work together—but the representatives are permitted limited speech and veto power, particularly if White Diamond makes a decision that is not simpatico with their masters' core objectives.
They are all gathered in room big enough to fit a large projection screen, slouching (or, in White Diamond's case, sitting straight backed and dignified) in chairs that look suspiciously like they have been stolen from the recreation center. The metal walls and floor betray their location as somewhere in the Containment Unit, and the claustrophobia of being so deep underground seems to have spooked Yellow Diamond's representative quite a bit. She keeps giving the metal roof suspicious, cringing glances, as if she expects it to cave in on her at any moment.
Ruby is not presenting in front of a panel, per se, but she is in possession of the tablet that controls the projection screen. The device is made for a gem about twice her size, and she looks comically small surrounded by such huge, symmetrical gems with it balanced on her legs.
"So, in light of all of this evidence, what are your conclusions as her handler?" asks White Diamond with a sweeping gesture to the projection. Her hand is long and slender, and seems to glow with ethereal white light, even in Sapphire's future vision. The softness of the sight is contrasted with her sharply angled shoulders, abrupt hips and spiked, electric white hair. Even her facial features seem sharpened to a point, severe and unforgiving. Even her gem, set into the middle of her chest, is cut sharp and triangularly.
Upon hearing this question that White Diamond will inevitably ask, something in Sapphire winds up, and it winds tighter and tighter as the seconds pass. She's not even there, and she can feel the tension in the room. Everything has gone more or less smoothly up until this point, but this point is so, so critical.
"Twofold." Ruby is very good at sounding brisk, professional and authoritative when she wants to. It's something Sapphire hadn't known about her partner, until today. "The first is that the subject cannot be trusted on her own, as evidenced by the fight that almost broke out the one instance I permitted her to explore the recreation facility without me."
"And you do not believe this is a tendency that will fade with time?"
"The last instance was fifty years ago, almost exactly," says Ruby flatly. "This is a character trait you have been plagued by since her capture. Having come to understand her over the last millennia, it is my professional opinion that this is not a trait that will ever be fully eradicated. There is no logical foundation for assuming that the subject will be able to regulate herself without a handler present."
Good, Sapphire thinks as her arms tighten around her shins. Playing this angle first is brilliant, Ruby. Keep pushing.
White Diamond hums enigmatically, considering. "And the second conclusion?"
"Considering the range and scope of her powers, and the resistance I myself encountered upon first being assigned to her, a rotating guard would not succeed. She would take advantage of the transitions, and would come to outsmart the handlers who haven't had the time to properly understand how she thinks."
Sapphire pauses. What? This isn't a point they rehearsed. What is Ruby thinking?
"But wouldn't the subject also miss that opportunity?" says White Diamond.
"Not necessarily. Remember that we're speaking of a gem with the power of foresight. The longer the subject spends with you, the more scenarios that add up in her head. She only needs a fraction of the time the rest of us do to come to such an understanding."
"You speak as if from experience, Ruby. Has this ever been a problem?"
Sapphire can't breathe. Not that she needs to, per se, but stagnation of the air currently inside her matches her rapidly expanding dread far better than fresh air would have. Oh no. No, no—portraying yourself as an incompetent handler is not following the plan! Just follow the plan, Ruby!
"It might have been," Ruby says. "But I can overpower her in any case. It doesn't matter how much you understand someone if you know there is no scenario in which you can win. Once the subject realized that, she stopped challenging me. Her demeanor became quite cooperative. I was interacting with an entirely new gem."
It feels as if she is talking in metaphor. Almost as if she knows that Sapphire herself is listening, and is trying to communicate something. But she can't know that, and what's the point of trying to communicate with Sapphire like this anyway? They're going to see each other soon (well, who knows what will happen now, since Ruby has sidestepped their plan; Sapphire's not about to stop watching this to find out—she's too anxious to turn away).
"So overwhelming brute force is all it takes to subdue her," says White Diamond.
"It's a good tactic for opening a rapport, but the real reason I get cooperation is from mutual respect. I do not treat her like a prisoner. As long as she doesn't disrupt the status quo, I leave her alone—but the moment she starts to, I put a stop to it. We coexist peacefully as long as that order is maintained, and it took years to establish this dynamic. I have no illusions that a rotating guard would never be able to do such a thing. There would be far too much mistrust."
"If I understand this correctly," White Diamond says, folding her arms over her neatly crossed knees. "You are saying that you've found a way to subdue her, but that you are the only gem who capable of it."
"Empirically, yes. But my true point is, why move back to square one when it has taken one thousand years to reach this point? Where is the practicality in that?"
White Diamond is silent. Her sharp features form an inscrutable expression—not that she was ever easy to read anyway, but nevertheless. "You are a willing participant in Blue Diamond's experiment for the rehabilitation of defective gems, are you not, Ruby?"
Sapphire watches Ruby stiffen, trying not to flinch at the term. Being called defective doesn't hurt when another gem of the same class says it, but coming from White Diamond herself the term is callous and cruel, synonymous with garbage.
"That is true, sir," says Blue Diamond's representative before Ruby herself can reply.
"Excellent. Now that we've cleared that up," White Diamond focuses the entirety of her sword-like attention upon Ruby. "Why do you seem to be arguing in favor of circumstances that would reduce your likelihood of joining gem society proper, as a rehabilitated gem?"
Sapphire lets out a small moan and buries her face into her skirt-covered kneecaps. No, this is precisely the sort of tone they were trying to avoid! A suspicious White Diamond is nobody's friend, least of all theirs! What is Ruby trying to do, get herself thrown off the job faster?
If Ruby ever makes it back to this tiny little communications room, Sapphire is going to shock her until her curls stand on end for an hour for putting her through this hell. She won't even feel sorry for all of the subsequent static shocks that will happen from contact with the walls and floor.
Ruby is surprisingly calm as she replies, "Normally I wouldn't be, but just recently the subject has broken confidentiality and let slip a small detail about one of the questions she has answered for you and your fellow Diamonds."
The tension in the room abruptly changes texture, Sapphire can feel it from the other side of the vision.
White Diamond's voice is as thin and deadly as a razor as she asks, "What, precisely, did you hear?"
"That a kindergarten with an Olivine as a supervisor is having trouble again, sir."
There is a very peculiar silence. Ruby, for all that she has done beautifully under the pressure of White Diamond and the representatives these last several hours—far better than anyone might have expected, for a gem so impulsive and emotionally inclined—finally begins to lose her composure. One leg begins to bounce and jiggle, and Sapphire can see her clenching and unclenching her gem-holding hand against the other thigh.
"And you have already come to the conclusion that you will never be able to leave this Containment Unit," says White Diamond finally. It's an oddly ambiguous statement. Is she impressed that she won't have to break the news to Ruby fresh, or perhaps exasperated at the logical leap?
"Yes, sir. I know I was never meant to find out about the nature of your correspondence with the subject, and the fact that I have—through no fault of my own—does put my potential to be released to the surface in jeopardy. If I can no longer be of use as a rehabilitation subject, the least I can do is continue my usefulness as a handler."
Oh, thank the stars, Sapphire thinks with an audible sigh. She's gone back to what they rehearsed. Sapphire closes her eye as she relaxes into her knees. Her poor nerves are shot, just positively shot.
"We can still use—" begins Blue Diamond's representative.
"No, you can't. I will never let a gem who has breached into classified information go to the surface," snaps White Diamond. Blue Diamond's representative shrinks in her chair as the piercing gem briefly rounds on her. "The subject has effectively trapped you here, Ruby. Are you certain this is not a part of some malicious plot?"
At this, Ruby laughs. It's a big, hearty laugh that severs her own tension, but only serves to befuddle those that have heard it. From her end Sapphire lets out a weak little giggle, too. All of the history, all of the conversations, all of the fear that came with finally talking about her future vision so openly—no. White Diamond, in all of her influence and wisdom, simply doesn't know the half of it. Laughing is by far the most direct and simultaneously roundabout way of expressing that sentiment.
"Well, if it is," Ruby says, snorting and wiping the tears from the corners of her eyes. "Then it isn't anything I can't handle. I'm not afraid of her, sir, and nothing she has stashed up those poofy sleeves of hers can change that."
Sapphire shakes her head against her knees. There is no question in her mind that that last statement was made for her. Now is not the time to be showing off, Ruby. You can brag all you want that you knew I was watching later, after you get out of this with your assignment and gem intact.
"Excuse me, but what am I supposed to tell Blue Diamond—"
"Tell her I've taken control of her defective Ruby," says White Diamond without sympathy or ceremony. "She's ruined for that project, but not for mine." Then, in what is nearly a mutter, "I didn't want to go through the hassle of screening Supervisors who could fight a 9 Mohs gem with two elements and the power of foresight, anyway."
All of Sapphire's muscles go weak, and she loses her balance and falls from her chair in a kerfuffle of ruffled skirts and tangled hair. She hardly notices the impact on the cold metal floor as she stays where gravity has deposited her, taking shuddering breaths, tears of relief squeezing from her eye.
"But sir—"
"If Blue Diamond doesn't like it, then she can talk to me in person, but this operation is more important than her measly rehabilitation experiments."
"Sir, this was one of our best candida—"
White Diamond waves one glowing graceful hand to physically swat the conversation away. Her severe gaze settles on Ruby. "Is that all you have to report?"
Ruby's eyes are wide like she can't believe her ears, and for the first time since she's come into this room she stumbles over her words. "Y-yes, sir."
"Excellent. You are dismissed. Keep submitting semi-annual reports if nothing goes amiss, but report to me immediately should the subject have another relapse."
Ruby is so excited to get the hell out of there that she nearly knocks the tablet on her lap to the floor. She catches it at the last second, and deposits it on the chair she's just leapt from with quaking fingers. She moves quickly, but her limbs are also comically stiff as she tries to maintain her formality. It's then that Sapphire realizes just how much Ruby has funneled into this professional façade. It's probably the best behavior anyone is going to get from her for the next five centuries.
Sapphire doesn't miss the look that Blue Diamond's representative gives Ruby as she takes her leave, but Ruby is far too focused on not breaking into an all-out sprint to give the looks she's being given the time of day.
Meanwhile, Sapphire finally pushes herself to sit up. This isn't how today was supposed to go. The possibility of Ruby taking those talking points and stringing them together in such a way that White Diamond believed her was supposed to be low, so low that Sapphire had dismissed this direction of conversation as a possibility in the early brainstorming phases.
This wasn't how it was supposed to go, but Ruby had somehow pulled it off anyway. In hindsight, she hadn't been reckless as much as brilliant. Sapphire needs to have more faith in the way that Ruby solves problems, she thinks, because it works. In fact, this arguably worked out better than the solution they had been rehearsing for. Sapphire never would have thought to use an unsolicited argument against her own replacements as fodder for convincing someone this is the best and only job she is suited for. Her style is so much more reactionary. Even when she acts preemptively, it is always a defensive response of what is to come. She never thinks to bring something up as both offense and defense.
Ruby, now that she's out of the makeshift conference room, has broken into a run. Sapphire knows how much time it will take her to get back here, and it's too long. She is on her feet and streaking down the hallway in an instant, her hair flying out behind her and the door to the little communications room left open, squeaking softly on its hinges.
It takes less than two minutes for Sapphire to meet up with Ruby and, with a cry of her name, snatch her into a powerful embrace. Everything she wants to say piles up on itself and clogs the back of her throat, and so she ends up saying nothing and instead just holding on tighter. Ruby doesn't mind, because she's hugging hard too.
It's been centuries since Sapphire has been alone, so long that even the abstractions of solitude have faded into faulty memory. She never realized how much she hated solitude before, how lonely it could be.
And now?
Sapphire grasps Ruby's cheeks and peppers her flushed and beautifully grinning red face with kisses. The sheer emotion surging within her is like a charging army, relentless and unstoppable. It spills from her lips and pushes its way from her pores, and while she should be overwhelmed she's not. It's natural, and it feels easy, and she doesn't ever want it to go away.
And now, Sapphire thinks as Ruby scoops her up and swings her around like it's nothing, and they laugh, simultaneously giddy and relieved and hysterical. Now she knows companionship, and happiness, and security, and she would use anything—everything—within her power to protect it.
I love you.
She doesn't say it aloud, but in this moment the knowledge rings as true as the wavelength of her gem. It's a Truth with a capital T, impervious to the influence of the ever changing future, an unavoidable fact a thousand years in the making, and it's as much a part of her as her elemental abilities. Sapphire isn't scared to let it become a part of her, just as she isn't scared to look Ruby in the eyes through her discombobulated bangs and let her see it. They're long past the point where being scared makes any sense, and who is Sapphire to argue with logic?
Ruby sets her down, and as they grip each other their foreheads press together in the sterile hallway of their eternal prison there is no need for the vocalization of her response.
I love you, too.