Tomorrow was the day that I was going to get myself locked up. My plan simple, all I had to do was to steal morphine from the clinic and sell it to Nygel. Nygel hated my mother and would surely turn me in just to spite her.

I knew this would break my mother's heart for sure, but it was better than getting locked up in solitary for 'treason'.

I said goodbye to my dad before he went to work and gave him a longer hug than usual. Just in case Bellamy failed to save him, I wanted to make sure I said goodbye properly. He was confused by the gesture, but he hugged me back anyway and told me that he loved me too.

After he headed off to work, I went to spend my last day of freedom at Bellamy's. He was working all day, but I still went over there anyways. His house made me feel more comfortable than my own. Maybe it was because of how simple the decor was or how it smelled just like him. Whatever it was, I wanted to remember it forever.

The day dragged on and I spent most of the time cleaning or watching stupid tv shows on the Ark TV. The only shows we had were whatever was salvaged from before the Apocalypse. Apparently people on Earth really used to like Sports and Reality TV because that's almost all we have to watch. I was watching reruns of some show called The Vampire Diaries. The concept was stupid, really, but it was the only thing on TV today. I'm not exaggerating, the Ark literally has only one TV channel.

I dozed off several times until an alarm I set on the microwave woke me up. Bellamy would be home in ten minutes and I wanted to make sure everything was perfect. Although we were speaking again, we weren't speaking much. He was still very quiet, hurt, and distant. I couldn't tell if it was because of what happened to his family, what I was about to do, or both.

I shut off the TV and straightened my shirt to try and look presentable. I don't know why I was so obsessed with looking 'perfect' for Bellamy now, but I was. I was especially nervous because tonight I would be sleeping over here. I know I did that before, but it was by accident, I slept next to Octavia, and Aurora was in the next room. This was different, Bellamy and I would be completely alone.

I justified spending the night at Bellamy's because we were going to be separated for over a year. It didn't take much convincing for Bellamy to agree and allow me to stay the night. I think the major reason he wanted me to stay was to convince me not to go through with my plan. Yeah, he cared about Octavia and the rest of the 100, but he didn't want me to get hurt in order to protect them.

The door cracked open for the first time today, revealing Bellamy in his janitor uniform. He was covered in the dirt and grime from a day's work and I felt terrible for him. He deserved so much more than this.

"Hey." Bellamy said as he entered his house. His voice echoed across the room sending chills down my spine. The house was so empty without Octavia or Aurora that it literally sounded different in here.

I gave him a small smile when we locked eyes and tried not to tear up at the thought of being away from him again.

Bellamy was quiet when he crossed the room and went into his mother's old room to change clothes and shower. When he reemerged, he was wearing nothing but his boxers. His hair was soaking wet and he shook it out like a dog to try and get it to dry. My face felt hot, but he was too tired to notice.

He scratched his long curls while he walked over to the wall where his bed was stored. I watched as he pulled the bed down and collapsed onto it. The old-metal springs rattled due to his weight. His bed was meant for someone much younger than he, but beds were expensive on the Ark. Even though everything on the Ark was reused and over 100 years old, that still didn't make it cheap.

Even though Aurora's room was empty and he could have kept her bed, he still refused to sleep there and sold the bed back to the ration center. I could understand why, it was full of empty memories and the reminder of everything he lost.

Bellamy clearly wasn't up for talking tonight, which wasn't surprising because of how exhausted he was. I decided that I should go put on my pajamas and get some sleep too. Tomorrow was a big day and if I was going to pull it off, I had to be sharp and alert.

I picked up my backpack off of the floor and made my way to the bathroom to change. When I opened my backpack and dug through it for my PJs, I realized that I hadn't even packed them. I cursed at myself under my breath and zipped the bag up again. Who forgets to bring something to sleep-in to a sleep over?

I peered at myself in the mirror, and shook my head at my stupidity before stepping out of the bathroom quietly. Bellamy was laying in bed, engrossed in some book, and didn't even notice that I came back into the room. I awkwardly pursed my lips and walked around the kitchen, unsure of how to ask him for his clothes.

"You doing alright?" He asked. His voice was raspy because of how tired he was and it made him ten times sexier. But, he still didn't tear his eyes from the old pages. Most books up here were on our Ark tablets because real novels like that were very rare and very expensive. He probably bought the book when he traded in all of his family's belongings.

"Yeah, I just forgot my pajamas." I admitted. Bellamy marked his page and set the book down on the table next to the bed.

"Go in the other room. There's a dresser on the left hand side. You can wear anything in there." He said, pointing to Aurora's door. I nodded and slowly entered Aurora's room. It was completely empty except for the dresser, which broke my heart.

I carefully opened the dresser drawer and discovered at least ten of Bellamy's old t-shirts. They would all be too big on me, but they were perfect to sleep in. I chose to wear an old blue t-shirt that fit me like a dress. When I fit my head through it, I couldn't help but relish in the smell of him. His smell relaxed me and made me feel safe.

I came back into the main room wearing nothing but his t-shirt and panties. Bellamy stared at me wide eyed as I traveled across the room. I tried to avoid his gaze as I pulled Octavia's bed down from the wall. Sadly, I had forgotten that there wouldn't be a mattress there anymore.

He cleared his throat, "They took all of Octavia's stuff to the distribution center too."

I nodded and stood awkwardly next to his bed. He moved over as much as he could and I knew exactly what he was going to do.

"There's room here." He said, gesturing to the bed he was currently laying on. I blushed at the thought of sleeping next to Bellamy. We'd slept near one another countless times, but we'd never slept with each other.

"I mean, I can sleep on the floor if you're uncomfortable-" He rambled due to my silence.

"No, no it's totally fine." I said nervously while climbing into the bed. Even though it was a tiny twin bed, he made it his mission not to touch me. I knew why he was doing it, he didn't want to make me uncomfortable, but it didn't feel right. We laid like that, in silence, for about twenty minutes before I decided to flip over and face him. He wasn't asleep yet and his long arms and legs were all jumbled up. His breathing was staggered, probably from the pain, but he didn't complain.

"You look miserable." I whispered. His eyes fluttered open again and my heart skipped a beat.

He chuckled, "I'll be alright."

We laid there for a moment longer, gazing into each other's eyes, both afraid to say anything more. I could hear my heart beating inside my chest as his eyes traced my face. We were so close, God if either of us moved slightly forward, our lips would be together.

"You can touch me, if you want. I don't mind, honestly." I stuttered. Bellamy hesitated at first, but then his body relaxed as he wrapped his strong arms around me. I let my arms fall around his waist as he pulled me against his chest. My head rested right above his heart and I intertwined our legs. He pushed his warm body closer to mine and I couldn't help but notice his bulge resting against my outer thigh. I wanted so desperately to kiss him, but he was already starting to fall asleep.

I closed my eyes and nuzzled my head against him as his chest rose and fell. He sleepily kissed my forehead and left his lips dangerously close to my skin. I didn't even notice that I was running my fingers up and down his bare back to calm him. I stopped myself, which caused him to groan in his sleep and pull me even closer to him. When I started to rub his back again, he hummed and relaxed again.

"Clarke?" He breathed. I felt a lump in my throat at the sound of my name escaping his lips.

"Yeah?" I asked. He caressed my face and gently kissed my forehead again. His lips felt so warm against my skin and I never wanted this moment to end.

"Don't go." He whispered.

"Bell-"

"Clarke...Please, don't go." He whispered. His voice cracked a little bit when he said this.

"I don't want to but-"

"Clarke…" He whispered, holding my face in his hands. I closed my eyes and tried so hard to fight the urge to stay. I couldn't stay, Octavia needed me and my father needed Bellamy. But I wanted to stay with him and be with him in every sense of the word. I didn't know when it came over me, but I was falling in love with him. Maybe it was when we danced, or when we went on our date, or even when I sent him to Mount Weather. Regardless, I knew now just how much he meant to me. And it scared me to death.

"I can't stay." I whimpered. He tugged on his bottom lip in an attempt to hold back the tears, but it didn't work. I was breaking my promise to him, but I was doing what was best for the people we love. I bear it, so they don't have to.

"Clarke, I made a mistake last time by letting you walk away. I even turned around to look at you and almost chased you down, but I didn't. I'm not going to just let you walk away from me again." He said.

"You know why we have to do this. If we don't, my dad will die and Octavia will spend a year frightened with the rest of the 100. I'm doing this for our people." I whispered. Bellamy rested his forehead against mine and let his hands run down my arms.

"You are my people, Clarke. Hell, you're my person." He said sincerely.

"What about Octavia?" I argued. He rolled his eyes, knowing that that was my only line of defense to use to convince him.

"I stopped looking out for Octavia a long time ago. She is stronger than I thought and she had Lincoln to protect her. Now I protect you." He admitted. I licked my lips as he leaned in closer to me. I didn't know what to expect until suddenly his soft lips brushed up against mine. It was a subtle kiss, but it was a kiss none the less. He pressed his lips gently against mine but pulled away seconds later. My lips felt like they were on fire and I couldn't believe what he'd just done. He searched my face, hoping that the kiss would change my mind, but my mind was made up. Someone had to go to lock up and look our people. We couldn't just stay here and play house. We didn't have that luxury.

It didn't take him long to realize that my mind was made up and that his kiss wouldn't change it. He shook his head and rolled over onto his side so his back was facing me.

"Bellamy?" I managed to get out.

"What?" He mumbled into the pillow. I gently placed my hand on his shoulder and kissed the back of his neck.

"I love you." I whispered. He was quiet for a moment, and I was afraid that I'd said too much. We'd never spoken about our feelings towards one another befroe and here I was, admitting my love for him. I wished that I could take those words back and covered my face in shame until he flipped around and crashed his lips into mine. I let my hands travel up and down his body as we deepened the kiss. Kissing him made me feel more loved than I'd ever felt before. He was a gentle kisser, but very passionate. I climbed on top of him, straddling his body, as I deepened the kiss. Since I was only wearing his shirt and my underwear, there wasn't much between us. I felt him grow under me which instantly made me want to rip my clothes off, but I didn't. Instead, I pulled away from him, panting heavily.

"I love you too." He gasped. I leaned in to kiss him again, but he stopped me.

"But I can't do this right now, not with you leaving." He said. I climbed off of him and sighed.

"Clarke, every time you leave, it rips my heart out. If we do this and go all the way with each other and then you just leave? How am I supposed to handle that?" He asked. I understood, it was a lot to ask of him.

"I understand." I whispered into the darkness. We were both laying on our backs now, staring at the ceiling. Suddenly, I felt him intertwine our fingers on top of the blanket.

"But I'll wait for you, if that's what it takes. Truth be told, I've been waiting for you all of my life. What's another year?" He said, trying to sound strong for me. I squeezed his hand tightly and fell asleep with him by my side for the last time...Until we meet again.