Our walk back to the dropship was painfully quiet. I had so many questions for Lincoln, but with Finn practically dying in his arms, there wasn't any time to ask them. Lincoln told me that he hadn't meant to stab Finn, but since he'd been living on his own for the past year, it was a natural impulse for him to do that. I couldn't imagine going through this all alone.
Before we left, Lincoln grabbed the antidote and gave it to me. I wished we could have stayed in his cave to do the procedure, but I needed Monty's moonshine to sterilize my hands and to have my mom walk me through it again. I remembered most of what I did the first time, but I wanted to talk to her just so I could be sure.
"I see the drop ship!" Octavia spoke up, pointing ahead.
"What are we going to do about him?" Jasper asked, nervously pointing his thumb over his shoulder at Lincoln. I glanced at Lincoln, whose expression didn't waver. He seemed a lot like he had been when Bellamy brought him back the first time. He was quiet, for the most part, and wouldn't take his eyes off of Octavia. She walked ahead of us, but Lincoln never stopped focusing on her.
As we approached the gate, Miller and Harper shouted for the Sterling to open the doors. Everyone was shocked by the drastic change in our group. We'd returned without John Mbege, Roma, and Diggs but we brought back Octavia, a grounder, and a dying Finn. The gunners on the walls trained their weapons directly on Lincoln, preventing him from moving any further.
"Miller!" I called out. Miller jumped down off of the wall and came outside to see for himself exactly what was going on.
Lincoln and Miller had gotten closer on the walk back from Mount Weather. After Lincoln helped Miller's dad at the doors to Mount Weather, Lincoln and Miller had an understanding. Now, Miller looked at Lincoln with nothing but hate burning in his eyes. I stepped in between them as Finn groaned.
"What the hell happened?" Miller finally managed to say.
"I'll explain everything once we get inside-"
"Like hell I'm letting a grounder inside of this camp! What would Bellamy say?" Miller argued.
"Bellamy would want this. Lincoln remembers, Miller." I pleaded. Miller seemed to believe me for a moment, but then his eyes wandered down to the knife sticking out of Finn.
"Did he do this?" Miller asked, pointing to the knife. I couldn't deny it, but Miller and the rest of the hundred didn't understand that Lincoln wouldn't hurt us. Finn was simply an unavoidable accident.
"He did but it-"
"Then there's no way in hell he's coming in here." Miller said, glancing back at the rest of the hundred who were standing nervously inside of the walls.
"Miller, the knife has a poison that will kill Finn if we don't get the antidote. Lincoln agreed to give it to us if we let him inside." I lied, glancing back at Lincoln who gave me a look that showed his approval. I didn't know how else to convince Miller to let me bring him inside. I'd have to slip the antidote back in Lincoln's pocket before anyone found out, but that was a problem I could solve later. Right now Finn was dying and I needed to get him inside of the dropship to save him.
"Oh my God...FINN!" Raven screamed as she pushed past the crowd. Tears began to fall from her eyes as she tried to grab Finn from Lincoln. I instantly pulled her away and wrapped my arms around her.
"Raven, he's going to be fine. I can save him. But I need you to go back to the radio and get in contact with my mother, I need her help." I said calmly. I wiped the tears out of Raven's eyes and sent her off towards the drop ship.
"Miller...please." I said, turning to him. He rubbed his forehead and then held his hands up.
"Fine, but we are doing it my way. He gets tied up on the top level of the drop ship and he has two armed guards watching him at all times." Miller compromised. I felt bad that Lincoln was going to be tied up again, but I nodded at Miller, allowing him and Atom to escort Lincoln and Finn into the dropship.
"Clarke, he saved my life! We can't just tie him up! What if they torture him?" Octavia gasped.
"It's the only way we can save Finn. I'm sorry." I replied. Octavia rolled her eyes and crossed her arms in defiance.
"Please, just trust me Octavia-"
"I'm done trusting you, Clarke. You're supposed to fix everything and look where we are now? My mother's dead, I got locked up, Bellamy's getting tortured by grounders, Finn is dying, Mbege, Roma, and Diggs are dead, and Lincoln is getting tied up. He didn't do anything to hurt me. I wanted to just leave him but you insisted that we take him!" Octavia screamed. A loud crash of thunder roared in the distance as dark clouds rolled in.
"You shouldn't have gone out looking for Bellamy! I had everything under control but then we had to go out there looking for you!" I screamed. Octavia scoffed.
"Stop blaming me for your mistakes! I wanted to leave, so if Finn dies in there, that's on you!" Octavia yelled. I gulped, feeling a rush of guilt fall on my shoulders. This was all my fault...I couldn't save anyone.
Octavia shook her head, "Everything that's gone wrong is because of YOU!"
I blinked back several tears forming in my eyes as Octavia's words replayed in my head. Everything that's gone wrong is because of me. Whether it was in this universe or the previous one, I was the one to blame.
Octavia stalked off towards the dropship, probably to keep Miller and his boys from torturing Lincoln. I was left alone just inside of the open gate. I glanced up at the sky, watching the clouds darken and thought of Bellamy. Would he hate me for all of this? Why was I the one that was safe and why was he the one getting tortured? I deserved it, after all that I'd done.
"Clarke, hurry!" Raven cried. I reached for the gate and slammed it shut.
I stood at the front door of the dropship, watching the rain pour while Raven desperately tried to get a hold of my mom. The storm was messing with the radio frequency making our signal almost useless.
I watched the lightning strike across the sky and wondered if Bellamy was okay. Was he out there in the rain alone? Was he even still alive?
I turned away from the door and tried to erase those thoughts from my mind. I had to stay focused on saving Finn...I could worry about Bellamy later.
Finn was lying on a table in the corner of the room, passed out. I ordered the rest of the 100 to go upstairs on the floor the Miller didn't have Lincoln. Octavia ran inside of the drop ship, closing the door behind her.
"Here's Monty's moonshine." She snapped, placing the bottle in my hands and then storming up the ladder. I glanced over at Raven, who was still trying to get a hold of my mother.
All of this stress made it difficult for me to focus on what I'd done to save Finn before. I knew I had to get the knife out, but I couldn't remember what angle I was supposed to pull it out from.
"Raven?" My mom's voice said through the radio. I ran over to Raven and took the headset from her so that I could talk to my mom.
"Mom, it's me, it's Clarke." I said. I heard her breathe a sigh of relief. We'd talked a few days ago, but this was different. I explained to her how Finn was stabbed by a grounder and that I needed her help to tell me how to remove the knife from his ribs. She walked me through the process, periodically cutting out from the storm, and I was able to catch on fairly quickly. Everything seemed to come with ease as I steadied my hands around the blade and pulled it from Finn's body. The dropship shook like it had the first time, flinging me across the room with the blade in my hand. I threw my head back, happy that I was actually able to save someone.
"Clarke can you hear us?" My mom asked. I stood at the other end of the room in shock, looking into Finn's eyes. For that moment, it was as if we were the only two people in the room. All of the memories of me stabbing Finn felt like they were washed away. I'd saved him!
"She did it!" Raven gasped, snapping me out of my trance. I glanced around the room and shakily set the knife down away from Finn. The hard part was over, now all I had to do was plant the antidote in Lincoln's pocket and then pretend to take it back.
I cleaned and stitched the wound while Raven sat at Finn's side, stroking his hair. She was so thankful that he was alive, and so was I. When his fever kicked in, I took that as the opportunity to head upstairs and see what was going on with Lincoln. I grabbed the knife off of the table and stuck it in my pocket.
Octavia was screaming by the time I climbed up the ladder while Miller and his boys tortured Lincoln.
"STOP!" I shouted over them.
"You said he had an antidote! We're trying to find out which one of these vials it is!" Miller shouted at me. I gulped and glanced at Octavia, who was almost in tears.
"Octavia-"
"Clarke he's seizing!" Raven cried from down below. I glanced at Lincoln, who gave me a slight nod, and then ran back down stairs. I heard the knife fall out of my pocket but I didn't have time to grab it.
"He was fine and-"
"Raven, it's okay. I won't let him die!" I assured her. She rubbed the tears out of her eyes and began to pace nervously around the room. I held Finn down, whispering to him that he was going to be fine. Once I got him steady and stopped him from seizing, I took the antidote out of my pocket and gave it to him.
"STOP IT! HE DOESN'T HAVE IT!" Octavia screamed upstairs. I stuffed the antidote in my pocket and bolted up the ladder.
Octavia was trying to pull Miller off of Lincoln. I ran past them and made my way straight to Lincoln who was covered in blood and bruises.
"I'm so sorry…" I whispered as I slipped the vial into his pocket.
"It's okay. This needs to happen so I can get Octavia back." He said weakly.
"WHERE IS IT?" I screamed at Lincoln, winking. He said stoic, but I caught the attention of Octavia and Miller.
"He won't let me die." Octavia said as she pushed past me. She took the knife that I'd dropped earlier and and sliced open her arm. Miller and his boys stood in shock as Lincoln nodded towards his pocket. Octavia immediately grabbed the vial out of his pocket and handed it to me. I thanked her, taking it downstairs and pretending to give it to Finn again. After Finn was done Octavia came downstairs for her share of the antidote and it was over. I'd saved Finn again.
Raven was asleep when Finn finally woke up. The storm had died down and most of the hundred where outside repairing the walls and assessing the damage.
"Hey." He whispered. I leaned over him and sat on the side of the table.
"Hey." I replied, smiling down at him. He took my hand, which caught me off guard, but I squeezed it back and didn't move.
"Good save." He said. I chuckled and let my head fall. I was so relieved that for once something actually went my way. Finn couldn't take his eyes off of me, but when I saw Raven out of the corner of my eye, I knew what I had to say.
"It wasn't just me. She needs you, Finn." I told him. His lips parted like he wanted to object but I didn't give him the time to. I let go of his hand and stood up.
"Raven, he's awake. He was asking for you." I said. She jumped out of bed and immediately ran to his side, taking his hands and cuddling up against him.
"I thought I lost you." She whimpered, burying her head in the crook of his neck. Finn's eyes locked with mine as he held her, and I could tell what he was thinking without him even saying it. I turned away, leaving him with the girl who loved him. A girl who needed him in the same way that I needed Bellamy.
So I left them in the dropship, and I never looked back, because Bellamy was out there somewhere and I wasn't going to rest until I was in his loving arms again.
A/N: Honestly I hate this chapter and I think it's because I hate writing Finn/Clarke and this is one of my least favorite episodes out of the entire series. Anyways, I'm sorry for the delay in updating, I was at Dragoncon all weekend and didn't have time to work on this fic. On the bright side, I met Ricky and Chris so it was definitely worth it! I promise the next chapter will be epic (it's my favorite so far) and it should be up within the next few days! Thank you all so much for your reviews and PMs! I love reading your comments and suggestions for this story so never stop!