Punk went home, creeping in the door as quietly as he could. He knew Harleen would be sleeping, and the last thing he wanted to do, was wake her.
Once checking downstairs and not finding AJ, he headed on upstairs, walking into their bedroom and spotting her lying on the bed, completely out cold on top of the covers, so exhausted, alongside Harleen in her crib who was sleeping also.
He wanted to talk with her, but he wouldn't disturb her from her slumber. Not when she was so tired from these past few days.
He made his way around the bed, shaking out a blanket and throwing it over her whilst pressing a soft kiss on her head, backing away and heading out of the room when a voice stopped his tracks.
"Seriously?" She said, in a quiet but angry voice, looking over at him as he turned around. She'd only kept her eyes closed to see what he would do. She woke the minute she heard him come through the front door.
"I didn't mean to wake you." He apologised in a quiet voice, watching her get out of bed, throwing the blanket away that he put on her, looking on at Harleen with a smile before it dropped when looking towards her boyfriend.
For the sake of their baby girl, and keeping her asleep, she walked out of the room, where he could only follow into the twins room, watching her pace with her arms folded.
"AJ, I'm sorry. I know you're mad." He apologised quickly, wanting her to know that he was sorry.
"I'm not mad." She shook her head, "I'm furious." She corrected him, "What… what the hell are you playing at?" She shook her head. She wanted to know what was running through his head. What could have possibly provoked him to leave her today at the hospital? So abruptly, as if making a statement that he didn't want to do this.
"I shouldn't have left." He said, "I know that now. It's just been a lot to take in, these past few days. I never thought about what would happen if one of the twins were ill or unhealthy. I figured we'd have time to prepare for that, when they got the flu. I… I'm just taken back a lot, and I don't know what to do." He told her, "I feel like I should be doing something, to help, and I can't do anything." He said.
"You're meant to be there!" She yelled, "Be there for him, and me. That's what you do. That's all he needs. He doesn't need you to make him better or healthy, or able to come home. He just needs you there. It's all he and Harleen is ever going to need." She said, "So if you're solution to these types of problems is to run as far away as possible, then I'm not sure I want that type of father for my kids." She said.
"I'm telling you I was scared. Don't be so spineless." He spat, "I'm allowed to be scared. Just like you." He said as she nodded.
"You are." She agreed, "But you aren't allowed to walk out of a hospital room, away from your family, a family that need you." She said, "I sat, and I cried for half an hour when you left." She told him, "I felt completely alone."
"You aren't alone." He assured her, "I promise you aren't. I just wobbled today. It's been a hard few days. I just needed to clear my head." He said.
"I'm scared you're gonna leave again. But for longer, and longer, until finally you disappear, and I never see you again, because I can see it in your eyes. This wasn't what you expected. You hate this. You hate getting up through the night. You hate changing diapers. You hate watching over your son whilst he struggles to breathe. You can't look your daughter in the eye because you see me, and you know you're stuck with me." She said as he shook his head.
"You're talking crazy." He spat, "I love you… And I love the twins. You're right, I hate watching Caleb struggle to breathe. Watching the little tubes keep him alive. It fucking kills me. I wish it was me that was weak and couldn't breathe right, and it was Caleb who was fine." He said, "The rest of what you said is bullshit." He spat, "I don't hate this. I have a purpose in life now believe it or not. And it's you and our babies." He said as AJ just folded her arms and turned away, shaking her head as a tear rolled down her cheek.
"You know… I grew up with a horrible… horrible father. Well, for the time that he stayed. He would sleep with anything that had legs, treat my mom and me and my sister like dirt, leave for days on a bender and come back when he felt like it. And I promised myself, I promised when I grew up and had kids… I promised that their father would be a good, kind man, who would love them and be there every day, and you're it." She shrugged, "It's only been five days and Harleen already cries out for you. But… if you're gonna leave when it gets rough. I don't want you here. I'd rather you just leave now, to save the pain in the future." She shook her head.
"Who said I was leaving? AJ… I was finding it tough, and I needed to go clear my head. Why… why are you getting so sensitive over this. I'd never leave you. You're the best thing that ever happened me." He said, "You're talking crazy." He shook his head in disbelief at what AJ was actually saying.
"You didn't want them from the minute I told you I was pregnant, Phil." She shook her head, looking up at him, "There's other options, April. There's other options out there." She mimicked as he ran his hands through his hair.
"Don't throw that in my face." He shook his head.
"Well it's true. Isn't it?" She said.
"That was when I didn't know how you felt about it. I was being supportive, and letting you know that I would be here for you, regardless of what you were going to do." He said, "Stop picking at everything and leave it alone." He said, "Do you not believe me when I say I love our children?"
"No." She said bluntly.
"Then you're a clueless, stupid, stupid woman." He said with so much aggression in his voice. He couldn't believe she was being like this, "What do I have to do? I'd take anything for Caleb to be home with us. So we can be a proper family, and I can prove to you how much I want this." He said, "It's been hard. I've struggled these few days. I just had to get out and clear my head today. It's draining and it hurts, watching Caleb the way he is."
"Oh, trust me I know." She said.
"Exactly." He said, "We're both finding it hard. We shouldn't be fighting. We should be pulling together. For Caleb." He said, "Don't question my love for them. It's the dumbest thing you'll ever do." He said, "I get it. You're feeling vulnerable, and fragile right now. I can see you're insecure. You haven't let me touch you since you've given birth." He pointed out, "I get that it's a bad time, but fighting and tearing into me isn't going to get Caleb out of hospital any quicker." He said as she looked down at the ground, shuffling her feat on the comfy carpet.
"You shouldn't have left. You.. you shouldn't have been so distant this week. Not when I need you." She said, "You can't expect me to pull together with you, when you're distancing yourself away from me. I'm trying to reach for you… I am. But you just keeping getting further away." She admitted, "I feel like I'm alone in all of this."
"Well you're not. I promise." He told her, "We're both finding it tough. It's nothing like we expected. But soon, this will all just be a rough patch we had to go through, and Caleb will be home with us."
"And you'll still be here?" She questioned.
"I'm not going anywhere." He made himself clear, "All the money in the world couldn't drive me away from you, or our babies." He promised her.
He knew they were just getting at each other from how hard and demanding these past few days had been. It wasn't what they were expecting, and it was all very overwhelming for two new parents.
"I'm so scared." She admitted, tears running down her cheeks as Punk sighed, pulling her into him, wrapping his arms around her as she sobbed quietly into his chest. They couldn't be acting like this. They had to be strong and come together. They couldn't start wars when their son needed them, and their daughter.
"I know." He nodded, "I am too." He admitted, "But we'll get through this." He promised her, pressing a kiss on her head whilst they stood in the twins room, which had yet to be complete, just awaiting their son who Punk knew could get better and stronger.
He'd taken his moment of weakness today, and it wasn't right of him, and he had owned up to the mistake of it, but he was here now, and he promised AJ he wouldn't leave. He was in this for the long haul from the beginning, despite what accusations she threw against him. He loved their children, and he loved AJ. He was gonna be here, because for the first time in his life, he was actually needed somewhere. Somewhere that didn't consist of blue flashing lights and yellow tape. He had a purpose in life now.
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