"Yes mum" Lexa says with a smile still plastered on her face, allowing her mother to continue talking. She simply nods and hums in agreement as they approach the car. Anya unlocks the car and they're met with a final ambush of affection from their mother.
"Shut the fuck up some of us is trying to sleep!" a disembodied voice shouts into the streets.
"Oh go fuck yourself" Anya yells back, receiving a stern look from her mother "your pansy ass can deal with five more minutes of noise while I say goodbye to my own mother. If the noise is really bothering you then why don't you come out here and say it to my face? The fuck is wrong with you?" she finishes off, directing the statement to no one in particular.
"This is where I would tell you off for your language but in all honesty you got to them before I did" their mother says with a smile before pulling them both in for a final hug "behave and make sure you call me when you get home," they both nod in response before they get into the car.
There's no such thing as a city that never sleeps. The drive home; was nothing like the drive on the way there. The city is slowly switching off in preparation for the next day, the streets clear themselves and the lights in apartments and offices flicker off and all that's left are headlights and street lamps. Lexa closes her eyes and takes a deep breath, she lets herself drift off into darkness, the hum of the radio softens and all the lights disappear.
She's woken up by her sister gently nudging her arm and telling her that she has to wake up because there's no way that she's going to carry her. She musters up enough strength to walk into the building and take the lift up to their apartment. She didn't have to walk very far to find herself passed out on the couch.
6 years ago
"What do you mean you can't?" Clarke asks her boyfriend as he opens up his bag, taking out his laptop and some files and heads to his study room.
"Look Clarke, I can't talk about this right now I have deadlines to meet. This is important" he says calmly as the laptop starts up.
"Are you serious right now?" she shot back, anger evident in her voice "you have 'deadlines' to meet so we can't talk about the fact that I just told you I'm fucking pregnant?"
He turns on his chair and puts his head between his hands, running one through his hair, and sighs "okay you want to talk? Let's talk. So you're pregnant, what am I supposed to do about that? What do you expect from me Clarke?"
"Finn, you do realise this baby is as much yours as it is mine right? I mean I shouldn't need to get into the mechanics of it all because I'm sure you already know how it works." She takes a deep breath before proceeding "I want to keep it"
"You what?" he says, getting up slowly.
"I said I want to keep it Finn" she said as he stood in front of her, narrowing his eyes at her.
"And then what're you going to do?" his voice is cold "do you expect me to drop everything I've worked for to go and play house with you?" he takes a step closer and she takes one back.
"I'm not asking you to do anything and even if I was it seems like you've already got your mind made up" she spat out.
A soft smile formed on his lips "this is stupid Clarke, don't be stupid. You're a smart girl and this is just a mistake, you can fix it, just get rid of it and we can pretend it never happened." The look on the blonde's face was wary as she took in the words that came out of the boy's mouth.
"I see" she said dryly after a few moments of silence and turned away to pack her bags, leaving him in the room staring blankly at the wall.
She made a quick call and turned to him, she felt so vulnerable. Tears were welling up in her eyes and her lips were quivering but she kept her voice steady "I know this wasn't planned for so I can't really be mad at you for saying what you did, I guess I just thought you'd fight for me" she blinks and lets a couple of tears fall and letting out bitter laugh through the tears "I'm not going to give you an ultimatum but if you ever do change your mind, you know where I'll be"
Her best friend showed up at the door in less than five minutes and helped the blonde bring down her bags as Finn stood in the common area, silently watching. "Clar-" he started only to be cut off by Octavia.
"No Finn. Not now, let her have time to herself away from here and I believe that when she wants to talk to you she'll let you know." The brunette said sternly and watched his face fall as he headed to his room. She closed the door to his apartment for the last time.
Clarke holds her composure and breathes slowly as they drive to Octavia's apartment swallowing the lump in her throat. They drive in silence and she's thankful for her best friend's understanding.
"How'd it go?" Bellamy asked as he opened the door and Clarke shook her head with a sad smile on her face as the tears started to well up again. He opened his arms and enveloped her in them and she let herself break. His shoulder offered a steady rest for her head as she burrowed deeper into it, tears leaked sullenly from her eyes, screwed shut as she tried to hold them back. Sobs escaped her and her lungs suddenly felt as if they were made of iron, it was painful to try and weep with iron pain pushed her further as she tried to seal her lips shut but found herself parting them for heavy breaths and laboured seemed to slow , occasionally, but then his face flashed behind her eyelids and it'd start again- renewed.
When she finally ran out of energy or water or whatever it was that fuelled a broken soul, Bellamy took her into his room and tucked her in. The next morning no one talked about it. The weeks turned into months and it was almost as if it never happened -the baby growing inside of her was a miracle.
The smell of pancakes filled the air and she followed it to her kitchen where she found Raven and John making breakfast. She smiled softly and stood watching them work until John turned around and noticed her proceeding to give her a hug "morning mummy" he said with his face buried in her waist.
"Mmmm you're not getting off so easy, what did you break?" Clarke asked looking at the younger boy with raised eyebrows.
He looks up with an innocent smile "I promise there's nothing broken here" a giggle earned him a sly look from his mother. He raised his hand to his heart sharply before decreeing "scouts honour," an edge of mockery to his tone.
"Okay you're off the hook...until I find what you did" Clarke said walking towards the island topped with food "you're never nice there's definitely something going on," picking up a pancake and taking a bite out of it. "I'm going to marry this" she proclaimed moaning – which earned her a smug look from Raven.
Raven smiled "Bellamy will be here in a while, I'll go get this one cleaned up and then you can do whatever it is you two do when you're together"
"Mostly just arguing about things like The Library of Alexandria" John muttered.
Raven laughed lightly "alright little man, are you ready for a day with Octavia and I?" He nodded, "Perfect. Alright Clarke we cooked so you have to clean up."
Clarke rolled her eyes playfully with a smile on her face. Of course. "Did Bel say what time he'd be here?"
Both Raven and John shook their heads no, "he just said be ready," Raven said with a shrug as she took her jacket and grabbed John's hand "now Clarkey, I know this is the first time we've left you home alone so please don't be too destructive and if you miss us, don't call because we'll be busy avoiding you" Raven hissed at the jab in response. "Owwww" she whined while rubbing her stomach dramatically.
"To be fair," John started, "you kinda asked for that".
Clarke smiled "and that" she said taking his face in her hands "is why you're my favourite"
"Clarke!" Bellamy's voice echoed through the apartment as he made his way in, he could hear water running and shook his head because of course Clarke had just gotten into the shower.
"Shower!" she called back "Out in a minute!" and knowing Clarke he knew that she would not be a minute and it would be best if he got himself comfortable.
"You might wanna get a coat too!" he shouted back and proceeded to slouch on the couch.
Half an hour later Clarke walked out of her room in a loose white v-neck and black jeans, Bellamy smirked as she walked in, "God Clarke we've talked about this, I can't be with you, you're a Montague and I'm a Capulet, it's forbidden," he said dramatically, hand on his forehead and eyes closed for effect, "make this easy for me Romeo, don't throw yourself at me."
Clarke crossed her arms and looked at the floppy-haired boy with an amused smile on her face, "remind me why we're friends again?"
Bellamy got up and grinned, "Because no one will talk about The Library of Alexandria with you," Clarke opened her mouth to protest but accepted defeat and remained silent, "who ever let you become a mother? I mean seriously this place is a pig sty," he stated referring to the pile of dishes in the sink.
"Hey if you want to have a go at it then please, be my guest"
"No. Any other day I would but you made me late," he looked at her and raised a brow, "so no coat?"
"It's not even that cold c'mon lets go."
"Okay but when you get cold, I will say I told you so," he said grabbing her hand. Clarke muttered insults as she was dragged out of her apartment by her best friend's brother.
The two walked through the streets in a heavy debate about the magnificence and importance of books. The conversation was filled with groans from blonde and proud smirks from the floppy-haired male.
"I'm just saying Clarke," he said stopping to hold open the door for her, "if it didn't burn down can you imagine the calibre at which humans would function?"
"I know but at the same time don't you think that losing all of that knowledge and culture has led to us being able to do what we can do now," Clarke said, more of a statement than question, as she took a seat.
"But just imagine how cultured we'd be and how much we'd know" he responded, picking up a menu.
"Please, have you met me? I'm as cultured as the human race is ever going to get," she said with a cocky smirk and Bellamy shook his head and sighed.
"I guess we have no option but to pray for the best," he said looking up from the menu, "where are we?"
The blonde shrugged "Trikru Café, Octavia recommended it. It's new and apparently they have the best burgers."
Bellamy narrowed his eyes and hummed "I'll be the judge of that I think."
The two ordered drinks and continued their discussion... above the preferred inside volume for most of the customers who shot them dirty looks but weren't ballsy enough to say anything. Often making the duo erupt in laughter, resulting in even dirtier looks.
A perky girl beautiful brown skin and wild hair held back in a ponytail walked up to the duo and their conversation died down, "hey I'm Kostia and I will be your server," she says flashing a smile, "are you two ready to order?"
Bellamy opened his mouth but the words came from the blonde sat opposite him, "hello Kostia, yes we're ready to order," Clarke said with a smile, "we'll both have the infamous grounder burger with a side of fries." Kostia scribbled onto a notebook and looked up expectantly.
"Will that be all?"
Bellamy turned to Clarke who looked at Kostia, "yes that'll be all, but please keep the drinks coming, like what is this stuff?"
Kostia giggled softly, "it's Pitaya, more commonly known as Dragon fruit."
"Holy shit will I turn into a dragon?" she asked and Bellamy shook his head.
"Please ignore her."
Kostia gave a small smile and nod, "your food will be ready in about 25 minutes, if you need anything more don't hesitate to call for me."
The brunette walked off and the two resumed their conversation, Bellamy was on the verge of ripping out his hair while Clarke threw her head back with laughter at his reactions to their contradictory views.
A few minutes passed before Kostia walked towards the duo with two plates, "one grounder burger for you," she said placing a plate down in front of the brunette, "and one for you."
"Thank you" Bellamy smiled, Kostia returned it sweetly.
"Enjoy your meal" she said brightly.
She was about to walk off but was held back when she heard, "you too," coming from the table and turned around to find a pink-faced Clarke with hands over her face and laughing Bellamy, "I-it's not that. Uh what I-uhh," the blonde tripped over her own words trying to explain herself and the smile on Kostia's face grew into an amused smirk. "I just meant to say yeah I don't know," she said feeling the heat rushing to her cheeks again.
"You'll have to forgive her." Bellamy said and Kostia gave a small nod and proceeded to walk away.
Alone again, the duo picked up their forks and clinked them together "bon appetite" said Bellamy and cut a piece from his burger as opposite him the blonde took a bite from hers and moaned in the midst of chewing "ffrm fllmr grrmm rrff" she gibbered incoherently -her friend looked at her pointedly.
"Yes, of course, me too," he said popping a piece of burger into his mouth and following the blonde's actions with wide eyes.
"I told you so," she said and they continued their meals, an occasional moan disrupting the silence.
With the bill split and a generous tip left on the table, they walked out of the building and the faint smells of coffee and cinnamon were replaced by exhaust fumes. The warmth of the cafe left them shocked as they stepped into the chill of the streets, the air biting at their ankles as they huddled into each other and picked up their speed.
Conversation flowed freely between them but was interrupted by a faint buzzing from Bellamy's pocket.
"Blake" he said pressing the device to the side of his face.
"Ew don't answer your phone like that," the voice said and Bellamy sighed.
"Always nice to talk to you Raven," her laughter could be heard distantly.
"Raven? Oh my god I need to talk to her," Clarke said grabbing the phone out of his hands.
"Oh Clarke you wanna talk to Raven? Sure, go ahead." The taller male complained earning a glare from the blonde.
"Please tell me my son is still alive."
Raven chuckled softly "yes he is alive and well, it's okay to get him ice cream in this weather right?"
Clarke's eyes widened and she sighed into the phone as she heard Octavia's voice and Raven's laughter "I really do wonder why I allow you to take him out, what's going on?"
"Nothing, John's just being a normal six year-old and Octavia isn't fond of my affections turning in other directions."
"Is that Clarke? Give me the phone" Clarke heard her say and smiled softly "Why didn't you think it would be useful for us to know about how picky your son is about pretty much anything?" Octavia fumed and Clarke cackled.
"I thought you would've been able to put that together Major Blake, he is my son after all."
"I don't like you right now. Bye."
Bellamy snatched his phone from the blonde's grasp and raised his eyebrows "you're not getting an apology, you should be used to this by now Minor Blake," the blonde said as she continued to walk.
"Fine," he said accepting defeat, "but why is she Major Blake?"
Clarke shook her head "remind me to tell you when we're all together," she continued walk until she felt the sharp feeling of snow on her neck and water down her back, she turned to find him with a dopey grin. His eyes widened as he realised what he'd started and he broke out into a sprint.
Lexa had woken up on her couch, exactly where she fell asleep and her sister had made breakfast. She smiled lazily as she walked up to the island and saw two cups of coffee and she hummed holding her cup to bring it up to her lips, happily welcoming the warmth.
"Have I told you that I love you lately?"
Her sister smiled and threw a dish towel onto the island as she picked up her own cup, "only every time I cook," she took a sip and placed the cup back down, "my coffee making skills are amazing," Lexa rolled her eyes at the side comment, "but anyways, what are you doing today?"
Lexa closed her eyes as she took another sip of the warm liquid, "I don't know," she opened her eyes and looked around the room, they landed on her camera, "I think I'll take some pictures, I haven't taken any in a few weeks," she finished off earning a nod from the other girl.
"Well I'm going to meet up with Lincoln and Kostia, you are joining us when you're done." Lexa opened her mouth but Anya held up her hand and she slouched, accepting her fate.
"Fine, I'll come are we meeting at the cafe?" she asked and Anya nodded, "okay I'll meet you there" Lexa headed to the shower.
The brunette walked out of her apartment building, the chill becoming evident from the second she stepped out.
She walked the streets looking for people to photograph but it was so cold the streets were practically empty; she sat on a park bench and enjoyed the stillness. The feeling of her phone vibrating in her pocket broke her trance-like state.
[9.32am] Kostia: don't think about bailing.
Lexa chuckled softly and typed out a reply.
[9.32am] Lexa: are you kidding me? Anya will murder me if i do.
[9.33am] Kostia: she's not the only one.
[9.34am] Lexa: I'll show. Later x
[9.34am] Kostia: x
She put her phone back in her pocket as she saw a familiar long-haired boy holding hands with two women -she followed.
Nico's was the place, according to the fluorescent sign outside the ice cream parlour / bakery. She walked in slowly and felt the feeling return to her face and fingertips as she warmed up.
The blue-eyed brunette got off the phone and advanced in, taking the little boy to the counter, Lexa watched as his eyes lit up at all the different flavours. The Latina joined them and looked at her friend with raised eyebrows as she said something just out of Lexa's hearing range.
She watched the little boy pick out his ice cream flavours and pout when he was given his cone, he whined and Raven sighed, kindly asking the man behind the counter to change whatever was wrong with it.
She made her way to the trio, "um hi," she said awkwardly and the two girls turned to face her, a smirk growing on the Latina's face.
"You're the girl with the really ugly sweater," Octavia said with a light laugh.
Lexa nodded, "yes that would be me," she looked down then looked back up, "um I'm doing this thing, it's kind of like the Humans of New York thing it's for my own project as a part of Jaha Magazine's photo team and I was wondering if you would like to be a part of it?"
Raven's eyes lit up at the offer, "yes" she said excitedly and Octavia groaned.
"Alright, so do you want to do it here or outside?" Lexa asked taking her camera out of its bag.
"I think outside," Raven smiled and headed for the door with Lexa and the other two behind them.
Lexa held the camera up to her face while Raven smiled and she quickly captured it, she walked up to the Latina and stood next to her, showing her the picture, "perfect," she smiled and Lexa took out her notebook and started scribbling something down.
"What do you want me to caption this?" Lexa asked and Raven looked up from the camera.
"Something that captures me you know. I love cracking wise, talking sass and making things blow up," Raven said and Lexa wrote it down with a smile.
"Do you want your picture taken?" she asked Octavia who shrugged.
"Why the hell not let's do this" she said as Raven handed Lexa back her camera and Octavia looked into the distance waiting for her cue, she let her mind wander and found herself smiling - Lexa instantly captured it.
"Wait I wasn't ready," Octavia said wide-eyed.
"That's kind the point," she walked up to her and showed her the picture and Octavia couldn't help but smile.
"Okay I guess that's pretty good," Lexa handed her the camera while she wrote in her notebook "I think you should caption it, I want to punch guys in the throat but I also want to catch fireflies and pick flowers."
Lexa smiled as she wrote it down, she took her camera and John looked up at her with hopeful eyes, "yes superstar, you're next."
The boy narrowed his eyes at the ice cream cone in his hands and brought it to his mouth, scooping some into his mouth with tongue. It turned out to be too much as he closed his eyes and opened his eyes and Lexa took the picture and asked him about what he thought as she showed him.
"You're really good" he said seriously, momentarily tearing his gaze from his ice cream, "you should photograph my party" he said as he continued to work on his ice cream.
She gave a soft smiled, "tell me about yourself."
He looked up with innocent blue eyes and furrowed his brows, then commenced to talk about himself from the time he took a mud bath and waddled through the living room to the time he built a pillow fort with his mother and her friends.
The photographer wrote down everything he said word for word and packed up her equipment turning to look at the two girls, "thank you for cooperating," she smiled.
"Thank you for letting us participate" Octavia said and Lexa gave a small nod before walking away.
Clarke and Bellamy arrived at the apartment only minutes before Raven, Octavia and John. Once they were all settled and sitting in the common area drinking hot chocolate by the fire the conversation flowed lightly.
"Well John, why don't you tell us about your day?" Bellamy asked the little boy who was curled up on the couch opposite him with his head on his mother's chest.
The little boy mumbled and then sat up and said "Raven took us to her mechanics lab and showed me what she's working on but I can't talk about it because I'm sure it's illegal, Octavia took us go-karting and we ate really nice hot dogs and then we went to Nico's and got our pictures taken so now we're celebrities."
Clarke looked at Bellamy who looked at Octavia, "remember the girl with the ugly sweater?"
"The one you were about to throw your clothes off for," Raven added.
"Always lovely when you contribute" Clarke said as John giggled beside her, "yes I know the one, what about her?"
"Well, she is a photographer and she took our pictures for this thing, kind of like that dude and Humans of New York" Octavia said.
"My God is her camera okay?" Bellamy asked and received a couple of pillows to the face from the two girls.
"Anyways, yeah so I'm guessing they'll be posted on the internet" Raven finished off for her friend.
"Did she say what magazine it was for?" Clarke asked.
"Jaha or something" Raven answered as she tried to fish out a marshmallow from her drink.
Clarke got up and went to retrieve her computer from her room as she searched for the magazine name and searched through its website until she stumbled upon its photo team and found the girl she was looking for 'Alexandria Silvanus, 26' and underneath was a link to her blog.
"Whatcha doing there princess?" asked Bellamy from the couch and she swatted him away with her hand.
The page opened- there was a picture of her son with a crinkled nose, eyes closed and an ice cream in hand, the caption read: "I got two ice creams today. This is my second, the first one had chocolate sprinkles so I spent most of my time removing them and it melted, so I got another with rainbow sprinkles. I prefer rainbow sprinkles to chocolate ones."
She couldn't hold back the smile at the caption that captured her son so perfectly -she didn't even care that Raven had taken him for ice cream against her wishes.
She smiled softly then browsed through a few more posts until she made the decision to click the follow button in the top right hand corner.
She closed her laptop and went back to her spot next to her son, who curled up next to her and hummed, "you're warm."
The blonde smiled as she held him in her arms and watched her friends argue over God knows what.
In that moment, surrounded by the people who loved her the most and the person she loved the most in her arms, she knew things would be okay.
Clarke watched them with a smile on her face until she felt a pillow on her head, looking around the room for the culprit, none of the faces looked guilty until Raven broke out into a fit of giggles and gave herself up.
"Well, now that you're here with us, shall we watch a movie?" Octavia suggested.
"No" Bellamy protested, "every time we watch a movie here, we always watch the same movie and I have to sit through 2 hours of you singing -then I have to put up with Octavia's singing for 3 more days after that,"
"Awwh" Raven cooed, "Minor Blake actually thinks he has a say" she finished off and pinched his cheeks but was quickly swatted away.
"Yeah, why am I Minor Blake?" he asked holding back a pout.
"Because, Octavia is the reason we're all friends and she's cooler than you" Raven replied as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.
"That is so untrue? You guys only met Octavia because I wanted to go to the ice skating rink and our mother insisted that I take her" he said and Clarke groaned.
"Yes you're the reason I went to the rink but you pushed over Clarke and I went over to help her and we became friends because we all decided to push you over" Octavia said slowly, "I guess that kind of does make you the reason."
"Bellamy, you don't get to pick your nicknames and plus you don't agree with me and my views of space so you're Minor and O is Major, end of." Clarke said, trying to put an end to it.
Octavia smiled "Exactly Bellamy, I'm Major, Octavia Blake the major-"
"Bitch" Bellamy completed the phrase, folding his arms over his chest while Clarke and Raven laughed their heads off.
The blonde stood up with John in her arms, his legs wrapped around her waist and his head on her shoulder, and slightly lost balance, "heavier than he looks eh?" Bellamy said with a smirk and she rolled her eyes and went into his room to tuck him into bed.
Once he was tucked into bed she placed a soft kiss on his forehead and whispering an 'I love you' that he sleepily returned.
She closed his door and walked back to where she left her friend only to find Bellamy and Octavia arm wrestling and Raven umpiring the whole thing. Clarke snuck up behind him and poked his sides causing him to momentarily lose focus and allowing Octavia to pin his arm down.
"Yes!" she exclaimed throwing her fists in the air.
"You cheated!"
"Street rules" Raven and Clarke said in unison as they exchanged a high-five.
Bellamy grumbled while muttering insults under his breath and Clarke laughed as she took a seat next to him ,"sorry baby," she put her hands together, "who is actually staying and who do I need to kick out?"
Bellamy stood up and grabbed his coat "well, I have an important meeting tomorrow so I should get going, O?"
The younger Blake looked at him as if he were talking to himself "no I'm fine here, thanks."
He sighed "Octavia, you have a big day tomorrow as well, c'mon" he said gesturing to the door and she groaned and reluctantly got up to follow him.
"if you two do anything, make sure you record it so I can watch it later" she said blowing them a kiss before closing the door behind her.
"And then there were two"
It was almost 2am and Clarke had been awake for too long. She was sprawled across the carpet with Raven beside her.
"Clarke!" she called out in frustration as a smile spread across her face, "no no don't do that. I'm not saying aliens aren't real but your arguments aren't really justifiable. We were in the same physics class, I even tutored you, what do you mean how is the universe infinite?"
"No seriously Raven think about this, how is the universe even a real thing if it's infinite?" She asked seriously and Raven sighed.
"Clarke…the red shift- this is basic astronomy"
"Yeah I get that but like imagine you could breathe in space and like something happened and you were exiled from Earth and you were in space, what happens then?"
Raven looked her and deadpanned "are you on drugs?"
Clarke erupted into a fit of giggles "no Raven I am not on drugs but seriously think about it, would you float forever and ever with no end or would you like never die because there's no oxygen so you don't age?" disbelief took over the Latina's face as she spoke, "I don't know man this just trips me up."
"Y'know, I want some of whatever you're smoking" she said as she earned her second jab of the day from the blonde "you know you don't look like you punch that hard."
"I know," she smiled "it's the perfect disguise."
The two sat in silence, staring at the ceiling, the silence spoke for itself. They stayed like that until the blonde found herself falling asleep, "mmm Raven" she mumbled and the Latina hummed in response "bed." she felt herself being lifted from the floor.
She felt the familiarity of her sheets and curled up into a ball, closing her eyes and allowing sleep to take over.
A/N: Okay so Lexa's last name is a bit different but that because I didn't feel lik ejumping on the train of Woods/Heda etc etc so I did some research and this is what I came up with:
Silvanus (sil-vay-nus), it comes from Roman Mythology and Silvanus is "tutelary spirit or deity of woods and fields and protector of forests" which I think was perfect for the Grounder Commander :)
Let me know how you find it and if you want to say hi or ask about the fic find me on tumblr toxiccity