A/N:

Thank you drovingallday96 for the review! I'm glad you thought I covered Marie's drive for survival accurately! It was a tricky chapter, but I'm happy that I've managed capturing some realism. I was planning on writing a section of this chapter from Malarkey's perspective! So I hope you enjoy!

Thank you BobtheFrog for the review! Yes, it was a painful chapter, very painful to write, too. Though I am glad it had such a strong emotional effect. Thank you for your encouragement (and yes, poor Marie)

Thank you icanttellthemthatsir for the follow, favorite, and for adding me to your favorite author's list! Welcome to the website, it's good to see you joined :)

Thank you Ingel for the story follow!

Thank you MASHlover23 for the review! It's great to hear from you again! Thank you for your dedication to the story, and I'm glad you've enjoyed the last few chapters! (Thank you for your reassurance with Bastogne, too). Yes, introverts for the win! :)

Thank you icytwist2000 for the story favorite!

Without further ado, here's the next chapter! This one is a little different since it'll be following Malarkey's perspective in some parts. Some dialogue from the book and TV show, you know the drill. I hope everyone enjoys!

Bastogne, Belgium

December 23-25th, 1944

Malarkey hadn't gotten much sleep the past night. He paced around, trying to keep his feet warm just as Doc Roe advised him to do, leaving a trail in his foxhole. Bain watched him with wary, exhausted eyes as he ventured back and forth. A lot had happened in the past few days; Skinny Sisk had been hit in the leg and sent into town, and the gunfire from the Germans had increased to no artillery to many conflicts a day. Joe Toye had also got his boots blown off and was now in danger of frostbite since he spent however long without boots protecting his feet. But all those events weren't what were keeping Malarkey up at night. Marie had been missing for almost two days now. No one had seen her since she left the group that one day after lunch. Babe had come to him saying that she hadn't come back to their foxhole that night. The two worried soldiers informed Winters and she was declared MIA until further notice. They requested to set up a patrol to find her like Easy Company had done with Bull, but much to their dismay they were denied. Dike said he wasn't going to take the chance on a 'wild goose chase' for one 'lowly' medic. Malarkey had almost socked the man right in the gut for his careless words. It took all his might to reply with 'yes, sir', salute, and walk away from the CO without causing any issues.

"God, look at that." Buck's voice interrupted Malarkey's hopeless thoughts. Buck had strolled over toward Malarkey's foxhole, staring up at the sky with a small smile on his face. "UCLA blue!" He marveled.

Malarkey glanced up at the sky, seeing what he meant: the sky was clear for the first time since Easy Company had arrived. It was a blessing not to be snowed on, but it didn't make Malarkey feel any better. Bain muttered something about baseball and Buck replied with a jovial laugh, but Malarkey didn't pick up on it. He could only think of Marie being trapped or lost somewhere out in these godforsaken woods.

Malarkey grunted in response, not interested in the color of the sky or sports. Buck gave him a sad smile, placing a reassuring hand on Malarkey's slouching shoulder.

"Come on, Father Maloney is holding another prayer session. It might help." Buck added in a lowered voice.

Malarkey nodded stiffly, followed his friend's lead without uttering a word. When they arrived the men and Emilia were already in a circle, heads bowed in prayer as Father Maloney spoke with his hands folded in prayer.

"God, the Father of mercies, through the death and resurrection of his Son, has reconciled the world to himself and sent the Holy Spirit among us for the forgiveness of sins; through the ministry of the Church may God give you pardon and peace, and I absolve you from your sins in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost. Amen." Father Maloney concluded, pushing his glasses up to the bridge of his nose. All the men muttered 'amen' in unison, then stood up to depart to whatever had to be done.

"Amen…" Malarkey mumbled to himself so quietly that no one heard it.

"That's it, guys, nothing more to worry about. If we're gonna die now, we're gonna die in the state of grace. Ain't that right, Babe?" Muck piped up, trying to bring some happiness to the sullen faces that surrounded him. Babe only looked gloomier when Muck acknowledged him, shrugging his shoulders with little enthusiasm.

" 'Nothing to worry about?' Marie is still lost out there, Skip." Emilia interjected sharply to her friend. The wry smile fell from Muck's face.

He sheepishly shifted in place. "You know what I meant, Em. I was just tryin' to make everyone feel better."

"Well it didn't work!" Emilia snapped. Muck recoiled as if she was going to hit him. She sighed, burying her face in her freezing hands. "The men are already stressed enough with this patrol coming up, this isn't a time for fun and games. We're missing one of our own and battalion doesn't seem to give a flying fuck because she's just she's just a woman and not an officer."

"Yes, ma'am." Muck retorted defensively.

Babe coughed, covering his mouth as he continued to hack. He had been coughing the past couple of days, and everyone was afraid he was getting sick. Emilia and Muck paid him no mind, the two of them far too upset. Babe noticed Malarkey standing at a distance from them, but enough to where he was in earshot. "Hey, Malark." He greeted with emphasis, trying to get Emilia and Muck's attention so they'd change the touchy subject.

Malarkey forced a smile as he walked up to join their conversation. "So, who's going on the patrol?" Malarkey questioned, rubbing his hands nervously together to the point where the friction made his skin sting.

Babe raised his hand. "I am. Julian is going to be lead scout. I heard Roe's stayin' behind. Martin and some of the higher ups are afraid to risk losin' anymore medics." Babe explained. He instantly regretted what he said, realizing how bad it sounded. "N-Not that we really lost any that is…" He quickly tried to recover. Malarkey, Emilia, and Muck didn't answer. Babe glanced between the three friends, nervously, feeling guilty for speaking without thinking.

"That's it, let's move out!" Peacock's voice rose. The patrol was already ready to march off. Babe dismissed himself, in a hurry to get out of there. The three friends remained immobile, watching as the patrol disappeared in the familiar snowy haze.

"Tactical columns, gentlemen." Martin announced. Roe started to approach the sergeant to join in the patrol, though he was already requested not to. "Doc, Doc – it's a combat patrol, why don't you stay back, and uh, keep your ass out of trouble, huh?" Martin suggested, halting the medic.

Roe looked over his shoulder, his eyes met with Marie's friends. Roe looked back at Martin. "Yes, Sergeant."

"Yeah." Martin grunted in response before leaving to join his patrol. Malarkey watched Roe depart in the opposite direction from the patrol. Roe sat under a nearby tree.

"I'm going to head back to CP and see if I can get that search party active to find her." Emilia said, pulling Malarkey's attention away from the medic.

"That's a good idea. Thank you, Emilia." Malarkey responded gratefully. Emilia headed for CP; the two best friends eyes followed the woman until she was out of sight. It was a long time before the two of them said anything.

"We'll find her, Don." Muck muttered to his friend before following Emilia's lead. Malarkey opened his mouth to respond but found his voice was too constricted with emotion. He only nodded wordlessly at his friend in reply. Muck left; patting Malarkey on the back and giving his friend the most reassuring smile he could muster.

Malarkey turned on his heel and headed back toward his foxhole. Bain wasn't in the foxhole; whether he left on orders or to give Malarkey space, Malarkey was grateful to be alone. He slipped into the foxhole, letting out a heavy sigh. His hands reached in his BDU pocket and pulled out the silver pocket watch that Marie had given him for his birthday so long ago. He traced the silver watch with his finger, feeling a deep melancholy wash over him.

"Shit…" He cursed, hastily putting the watch away. Malarkey wanted to go out and search for her, but there was nothing he could do. The Germans were on the move and battalion didn't want to risk anyone else becoming MIA. Malarkey knew that Dike didn't give a shit about losing one solider, but losing another would be trouble for Easy Company. Malarkey was disgusted that Marie's value of life was reduced to a number. He grumbled to himself, fumbling with the plate to his mortar gear to keep his mind from angry thoughts.

"I need some help here!" Toye's husky voice called. Malarkey sat up in his foxhole, trying to locate him. "Somebody get me a goddamn medic!"

"Joe, what's going on?" Malarkey yelled back. He climbed out of his foxhole in a frustrated huff. "Where are you?" He shouted again, squinting his eyes to focus. Malarkey saw Toye come through the haze, carrying something in his arms. Malarkey's heart leapt in his throat when he realized it was Marie.

Marie's eyes felt heavy, almost too heavy to even open. She couldn't even open her left eye, feeling that it had swelled completely shut. The sun was bright, blinding her vision for a moment until she noticed there were two people fussing over her. Emilia and Roe's faces soon became clear. Where was she? She didn't feel like she was on the snowy ground. Her back was one something hard, and she seemed like she was lifted higher than ground level.

"Marie, oh thank God!" Emilia exclaimed, nearly in tears as she noticed Marie had come to. "What the hell happened to you? What are you wearing, and why are you covered in blood?" Marie blinked rapidly as Emilia continued to bombard her with questions. Her head hurt too much to process everything Emilia was asking her.

"Where am I?" Marie managed to say, her voice rough like sandpaper.

"You're on a truck that will soon be headed into the little town of Bastogne." Emilia answered, cupping Marie's face caringly as a big smile of relief spread across her face.

Fear suddenly overcame Marie. She didn't want to be anywhere else; she wanted to be with Easy Company or in her foxhole. Marie had finally made it back to safety of her company and now she was being taken away again. Did they know about the crime she committed? How did she know this wasn't a trick? They could be hauling her off to some kind of prison or something for killing a civilian.

"No! I don't want to go!" She shouted, startling Emilia and Roe.

"Marie, Gene doesn't have the equipment to fully check-" Emilia started, raising a confused eyebrow at her.

"NO! I DON'T WANT TO GO! GET ME OFF OF THIS! I DON'T WANT TO GO!" Marie started to scream and thrash violently. She rolled herself off of the truck and landed on the snowy ground with a thud. The landing hurt, but every fiber in her body told her she needed to get off of that truck. Marie's cries had alerted some of the men of Easy standing by. They curiously looked in her direction to see the injured medic moving around in the snow as if she was a captured animal.

"Marie? What the hell is wrong with you?" Emilia exclaimed in shock, jumping off the truck to help her friend up. Emilia gripped her wrists and tried to pull her up but Marie struggled away from her, falling backwards in the snow again.

"I DON'T WANT TO GO!" Marie continued to shrilly scream, flailing around the snow as she tried to distance herself from the truck. Marie's thoughts ran a million miles per hour, filling her with irrational beliefs that shook her nerves to the core. She thought that everyone knew about how she murdered that man, and now they hated her and wanted to take her away and punish her for it.

Malarkey had heard her cries and immediately broke free from the stunned crowd and ran to aid Marie. Emilia and Roe were already at her side, attempting to lift her up again. Marie wailed as if she was being brutally attacked, her eyes clenched shut and her face red as she struggled against their touch like a feral child trying to be tamed. The sight horrified Malarkey and Emilia; this wasn't normal for Marie, hell, this wasn't normal for anyone.

"What the fuck did you do to her?" Malarkey demanded, his arms encircling around Marie to keep her steady.

"She's hysterical." Roe stated, pulling out a syrette of morphine out of his pack. He stuck the needle into her thigh without another word of explanation.

Marie felt her body go limp as she continued to fight against them. "No, no, no, no, no, no-" She continued to say, her words spilling with each breath of panic.

"What's wrong with her?" Emilia asked Roe with serious concern.

"Shell shock or something. Just give her some space, whatever happened to her out there was serious." Roe explained, he looked up at Emilia and Malarkey. "Do you two have any idea what happened?"

Malarkey shook his head. "Joe came over carrying her. She was passed out and covered in blood. She has bandages all over her, bruises on her face and neck. Hey, is she going to be all right?" Malarkey pressed, clutching Marie's limp hand in desperation.

"I'll find out as soon as I get her to the hospital." Roe answered, lifting Marie's now calmed body up. He carried her back to the truck, though she continued to protest under her breath. "It might be best if you two stay behind." Roe told Emilia and Malarkey. It pained him to suggest that, but considering Marie's hostile and odd reaction he couldn't take his chances. Malarkey and Emilia glanced uncertainly at each other but knew that Roe was most likely right. They watched reluctantly as Marie was taken away.

The hospital was inside a church, and was overly crowded with the wounded and dying. Marie was placed on a gurney and put along one of the walls as Roe waited anxiously beside her, his hand drawn up to his mouth while his fingers drummed his lips. Marie's eyes darted worriedly around the church, afraid of someone coming to arrest her or interrogate her. She didn't like this little town, it had been bombed by the Germans in multiple barrages and stunk of dust and illness. Marie didn't like being surrounded by strangers, she only wanted to be back in the Ardennes forest with Easy Company. The morphine was still cycling around her system, making her limbs feel unattached and her mind slow. She wanted to stand up and get out of this place; she'd crawl all the way if it meant getting back to her men.

A nurse wearing a blue headscarf hurried in and was instantly bombarded with medics asking her questions and demanding her assistance in every direction. The nurse didn't seem stressed from the busy schedule that was just laid before her, she answered each question with great poise and proceeded to walk deeper into the church. When Roe saw her he quickly went to meet her before she disappeared in the mass of gurneys and scrambling soldiers. Marie almost cried out to Roe, not wanting him to leave her side but the nurse stopped walking and listened to what he had to say. They way they spoke Marie noticed that they knew each other. They spoke back and forth in French and English rapidly, Marie was still too out of it to catch what they were saying. Roe gestured in her direction and the nurse followed the direction and her kind eyes landed on Marie. The nurse walked over to Marie's gurney, inspecting the bruises that marred her skin.

"Hello, how are you feeling?" The nurse asked in a soft, accented voice.

Marie tried to shrug her shoulders. The nurse helped lift her up so she could take a quick look-over of the rest of her body. She checked the cuts under her bandages, checked her pulse, and the lymph nodes in her neck.

"I think you are fine to return soon. You just need some rest." The nurse said.

Marie shook her head. "I want to go back now."

The nurse gave her a sad, patient smile. "That's not what Eugene has told me. You are experiencing battle fatigue." The nurse reached in her waistcloth and took out a bar rapped in colorful tinfoil. "Do you want some chocolate?"

Marie cautiously glanced at the nurse and back at the chocolate, finding her instant generosity suspicious. Marie loved chocolate, and hasn't had anything sweet in so long she almost couldn't recall what it tasted like. She slowly took a piece, breaking it off from the bar. Marie brought the chocolate to her lips and slipped it into her mouth. The chocolate was a little hard to chew, but it tasted like heaven. The nurse gave Marie another kind smile that made her feel horribly guilty. She thickly swallowed the chocolate, feeling ashamed that she was able to sit here and enjoy this.

"I don't deserve your kindness." Marie mumbled, laying back down and looking back at the walls of the church. The nurse didn't respond, she only nodded solemnly, understanding this was her cue to leave.

"I'll be here if you need anything. My name is Renee." She finally answered before departing to take care of the next soldier in line.

Marie looked back at her, feeling guilty of her own rudeness. "I'm Marie."

Renee smiled then left to the next gurney down the line. Marie sighed deeply, wishing that she was discharged to leave. Roe came back to her, carrying a cold, wet cloth. He placed them gently over Marie's eye. Uneasiness churned in Marie's stomach knowing Roe would have to leave her and return to the line soon.

"They don't have any ice, so this will have ta do for the swelling and pain." Roe informed her.

Marie felt tears brim in her eyes and a large lump form in the middle of her throat. Marie felt like a small child about to be left at daycare for the first time. Marie didn't want to stay here and listen to men wail and die through the night. She was afraid of what her own thoughts and dreams would bring to her that evening. The German man's image would float gradually into her memory, making all the fear and culpability return.

Roe saw her forlorn expression appear on her face. "What happened to ya in the woods?"

Marie's bottom lip trembled. She couldn't tell him, she was too afraid to admit what she'd done to anyone. She couldn't remain under his stare without feeling like she was shrinking into nothing; she turned away, closing her eyes and facing the wall again. She bit down on her chapped lower lip, trying to stop it from trembling so visibly.

"That's okay, you don't have to talk about it yet." Roe replied. "I need to get back to Easy Company."

"Don't go…" Marie's voice came out in a pained whisper.

Roe sighed, awkwardly standing in place not knowing how to answer her. "I have to." He left before she could beg any further. Marie watched him with tear filled eyes, feeling like she was suffocating in dread.

"Don't go." She repeated, knowing he wouldn't be able to hear her now. Now she was left alone in a church full of strangers. Marie was a medic and a nurse herself, she was used to crowded and busy conditions such as the situation in Bastogne, but that was before she had become one of the patients.

Night would soon come and the corridors of the hospital would turn dark other than the dimly lit oil lamps that sat on some of the nightstands. The murmuring would quiet down to a few coughs and cries here and there; the sound of scurrying footsteps from a nurse or medic would echo down the church. Sleep would not come to Marie that night, especially since the sleepy side effects of the morphine were starting to wear off. The corridors had something else creeping in the darkness, something that Marie couldn't bring herself to face or stomach. Something only she could see. The German man's figure appeared in her mind around her wherever she looked. His piercing blue eyes bore into her soul, soon being transformed into nothing but bloody remains. His wife would appear, too, holding onto her belly. She wasn't happy like she was in the photograph, instead she was weeping. The silence brought nothing but the loud announcement of her deed like a grim reminder whispering in her ear. Marie closed her eyes and covered her ears, trying to block out the harshness of the still silence. If she was with Easy Company this wouldn't be happening. She'd be able to keep busy and keep her mind off of the German man and his widow. She wanted to be with Malarkey and Emilia and Muck, all sitting and laughing together like they'd used to. She wanted everything to go back to normal before any of them had blood on their hands, before they entered Bastogne or even Europe. Marie wanted to be back in Camp Toccoa, where the bits of hell they endured was nothing compared to the hell they've all come to know.

Marie felt the wet cloth drain over her face, dripping and running down her cheeks and nose like tears. The German wasn't the only ghost lurking these halls, Marie could also feel the presence of her mother and the Dutch man whom had almost assaulted her in Eindhoven. Marie watched the scenes play before her mind in silent agony, practically making her mind unravel from sanity and into something anxious, twisted, and even numb.

Tomorrow couldn't come soon enough.

Malarkey trudged with dazed footsteps back to his foxhole; his heart was heavy with worry and fear. As he approached he noticed Buck, Toye, Guarnere standing with Winters and Nixon. They looked like they were having a deep conversation, a conversation Malarkey knew he didn't want to have.

"Sergeant Malarkey." Winters addressed him in a soft voice, his cyan blue eyes searching Malarkey's face for emotion.

Malarkey gave him a curt nod. "Sir."

"I was just explaining to some of the other noncoms of 2nd platoon about Marie."

Here we go. Malarkey thought to himself with dread.

"You was sayin' you think she crossed a kraut, sir?" Guarnere asked Winters, his eyebrows drawn in questioning concern.

"That or another soldier." Nixon suggested, looking disgusted with the possibility of one of their own doing that to her.

"I don't know, whatever she encountered out there seriously spooked her." Winters replied.

"Is she going to be all right?" Buck asked.

"We'll know once Doc Roe returns." Nixon answered.

"Um, sir." Toye's husky voice piped up. "Hun was wearing this when Earl and I saw her wanderin' 'round." He held up the German's bag. "She was also wearin' some other clothes."

Malarkey had noticed the overcoat, cap, mittens on Marie, but he hadn't seen the bag. What really drew his attention was the fact that Marie was covered in blood, had a large black eye, bruised cheek, and bruises Marie had on her neck. It looked like she was in a scrap and someone had wrung her neck. Anger rose in Malarkey's stomach at the thought of someone touching her and hurting her in such a way.

Winters furrowed his brow. "Have you searched it?"

"No, sir." Toye replied, handing the bag over to the higher officer.

Winters opened the top flap and stuck his hand inside. He pulled out a few items and handed them to Nixon, whom inspected them in his freezing hands. Winters removed a few empty cans of fruit, an empty canteen, a pocket watch, and a pocket book. Buck took the pocket book and opened it, flipping through the pages as he scanned its contents.

"It's in German." Buck announced. As he went through the book, a photograph fell out of it and softly landed in the snow. Malarkey reached down and grabbed it, shaking the flakes off of it. The photograph was of a man and a pregnant woman, smiling at the camera.

Winters sighed. "Sergeant Toye, come show me where you found Marie. There might be Germans coming or in the area." He signaled Toye to follow him, while Nixon was close behind.

The three other men remained behind in silence. Malarkey went to walk off when he felt someone grip his bicep. Malarkey swallowed, not wanting to speak or even think about anything other than returning to his foxhole. He reluctantly turned to see Buck clutching his arm.

"She's alive, Malark. That's what matters." He said in a thick voice.

Malarkey nodded slightly, averting his gaze. Malarkey shrugged his large hand off and went off to find his foxhole. He still held the photograph in his trembling hands, glancing down at it from time to time. Why did Marie have this in her possession? Why did she have any of these things in her possession? Malarkey blocked out the possibilities that surfaced in his mind, trying not to think of Marie running into krauts and getting jumped. He slipped the photograph in one of his free pockets, deciding that Buck was right after all.

Marie was alive. That's what mattered. He was sure he'd get all the answers once she safely returned to him.