Chapter 34.

Please review and lemme know your opinions. :)

Plain Jane rewrite is in the works! Lemme know... Should I post it as a separate story, and keep the old story up for those who may prefer it that way? That's what I'm thinking.

This chapter's slow and simple. Bear with me!

I don't own Lord of the Rings. All rights belong to Middle-earth Enterprises and New Line Cinema.

(Sophie)

"Just keep your eyes closed..." Collin whispered as Gandalf's light revealed countless decayed corpses all around. He placed a gentle hand on my back, and slowly pulled me into his chest- where I couldn't see the death around us.

"No..." Gimli sighed.

"There's no turning back now..." Gandalf gently tapped his staff on the ground, signalling us to move forward. "We'd best be quiet, if we do not wish to share in this fate."

Share in the same fate? I'd much rather dig myself out of here and face the kraken than die in this place.

Collin pulled away and lightly tugged at my hand. "Keep your eyes closed, Soph. I'll tell you when to open them"

Not only was this absolutely terrifying to me, but it was also unbelievably embarrassing. Here I've been, trying to be strong and prove that I'm not some foolish girl, but at the first sight of death I nearly faint? Even Gimli, whose people are lying scattered in pieces around the room, is reacting far better than I am. The hobbits are even holding themselves together, and they don't even have high-def. horror films in the Shire! If anything, I should be the one used to it.

Not me. No, this is why women aren't allowed on outings.

We reached some steep stairs, which I carefully navigated, until I tripped onto a broken step and fell right on my face. My first concern was that I slipped on blood... The second fear of mine was that I broke my rib, for I heard the distinct crunching of bones when my face hit the ground. My eyes opened to the sight of a former dwarf staring at me with empty skeleton eyes, one of which contained a broken arrow. His bones were chipped and covered in a substance that I had no intention of discovering.

Before I could panic, Collin ran forward and kicked the dead being out of sight.

"Nothing to see here!" He chuckled awkwardly and hauled me up before I even had a second to think.

Gimli ran forward, his eyes wide in terror. "You've dishonored the body!"

"Shh!" The grey wizard ahead of us shot around to give us a stern warning glance.

Collin gave our dwarf friend a comforting pat on the shoulder. "I'm sorry, old chap... But if we'd have given Sophie time to scream, whatever killed these mighty warriors will surely come back for seconds..." He eyed the charred remains of one dwarf and shuddered. "I, for one, would like to keep my head."

Gimli let out a sigh as he looked upon the massacre. I could have sworn that I saw a tear in his eye, but one can hardly tell under his massive brow. He said a short prayer in his own language and moved to follow Gandalf; his posture more tired-looking than usual.

Collin looked after him, a sad look on his face. A rare sight.

"Come on, let's get out of here..." He took one last look about the room before hurrying to catch up with the others. Although he's never talked about it openly, I know that Collin has this funny thing about death and killing.

Well, I wouldn't exactly call it funny. It takes a sick person to smile at killing one another. A better word for it is human. He views life as a precious gift, not to be wasted. Seeing such things as this makes him silent and distant. The only reason he learned how to fight was to avoid being the victim of such massacres.

A part of me wanted to just go run about and hug every last person in this Fellowship. I'd even hug Legolas; the look on his face when we walked in here must have been nearly as bad as mine. I can only expect so much, since it's not every day he sees death. Living forever must have its advantages.

Boromir nudged me gently with his elbow. "You might want to cover your eyes again..."

My eyes caught another glimpse of a dead body before I actually remembered where I was. "Oh, right..." I'd gotten so caught up in everyone else that I nearly forgot about the dozens of dead dwarf bodies scattered about the room... Convenient...

By now, the room was mostly dark, due to Gandalf's determination to keep moving forward at all costs. Hey, what's the value of a steward's son and a woman?

So, Boromir quickly navigated the room, careful to avoid anything that may lead to the crunching of feet or regurgitation of Sam's nicely cooked veggie stew. That hobbit can cook wonders, I tell you.

Unfortunately, in our haste, the excess baggage that we now carried (due to the loss of our pony) made especially loud noises as we rushed to meet the light.

"What did I tell you about being quiet?" Gandalf didn't even look back at us, but the tone of his voice didn't make him any less scary. "You may open your eyes now, Sophie, if that silences your step. These halls are clean."

Even so, I'm liking this closed-eye thing. Maybe I'll just go to sleep, and wake up at the end of the tunnel.

Then again, there was a certain curiosity that sparked inside of me, despite my current fears. Amidst all of the campfire stories told on this journey, a certain dwarf managed to pound into my head this amazing picture of a dwarf's world. He spoke of magnificent halls and feasts that would stuff the belly of even a hobbit. So, no matter how badly I wanted to keep my eyes closed to whatever dead things that await us, this was the chance of a lifetime. How often does a human get to enter the land of the dwarves?

So, very carefully, I opened my eyes with anticipation.

And they were met with disappointment.

The walls were cracked and worn with age, and that disgusting smell made any amiable features of this place forgettable.

"Are you afraid of the dark, milady?"

I turned to see Pippin watching me with sympathetic eyes.

"What would make you think that?" It was true, but I've got a reputation to uphold.

Okay, so whatever good reputation I had was lost when I hid from a giant kraken whilst my friends fought to save our lives.

"You look frightened." The hobbit shrugged. "Do not worry, Sophie. You've nothing to be scared about. Merry and I have got your back!"

My other favorite hobbit skipped up to my other side and gave me a warm smile. "Nasty place, isn't it?"

"Shh!" This sush came from Gimli, rather than Gandalf. The dwarf was going through some intense emotional problems at the moment. Completely understandable.

(Kristy)

Sure, Theodred. Leave me to find your cousin on my own.

"It's simple, Kristy! Just look for the woman with wavy blonde hair."

Well, Theodred, that's about every woman in this city.

Of course, I shouldn't be cranky with my new friend. He is, after all, providing for me in my time of need. I need to learn to stop being so... Twenty-first century.

It's just been a rough day. I got no sleep the night before, for the walls of the inn are thin, and the people of Rohan were merrymaking at the bar downstairs for a good portion of the night. Then, after I woke up with a headache and tired eyes, I went to the market in an attempt to buy some food.

Did you know that Rohan has its own language? Because let me tell you, I had a heck of a time trying to buy a roll from an old, hungover man who spoke no common. He was about to rip his hair out by the time I was through with him. Fortunately, I was saved by another old man, Beorn, who kindly translated for me. I don't know how, but the topic of Collin came up, and the old baker and Beorn were thrilled to hear about him. As a result, I told them a couple of stories, and they let me leave with some free food.

Okay, so maybe today's not so bad. I'm just a little grumpy from my lack of sleep. Hey, I'm human.

I pulled my shawl tightly about myself as a cold burst of wind rushed by, carrying the rotten smell of horse doodoo with it. I thought that the stables would be a fun place to go. I'd see the pretty horses, maybe feed them a bit...

But no. This place is making me remember why I hated going to my Uncle Charlie's ranch every Easter... Horses are cute and all, but all living things must... Well, you know...

To make it all worse, there was a man staring at me from across the stables...

It wasn't a creepy stare, but a curious one. I suppose that I must look rather odd, just standing here, but what else is there for me to do? Should I go pretend like I know what I'm doing with these massive steeds? Or perhaps I should go get a sweep and start, well, sweeping things... Of course, that'd be a bit difficult, considering the fact that the floors are covered in hay.

No, I'll just stand here and bear it. He's kind of creeping me out... People have always told me to be wary of strangers in this world. Who knows what kind of man this stranger is?

Sigh...

I looked out into the distance, towards the mountains. Somewhere beyond there, my two best friends and my brother are out risking their lives for this world... Well, Sophie's just kind of a tag-along... She and Collin always have to follow each other around. Kind of like Frodo and Sam, only, I don't want Frodo and Sam to get married...

Goodness... They'd better be taking good care of my little hobbits. Heck, they'd better be taking care of themselves. I came to Rohan in hopes that I'd see them here, soon enough. If we're lucky, the Fellowship + Sophie will make their way to the Gap of Rohan, and maybe they'll be here in a few weeks.

Then again, that's just hoping. Life's never that simple.

If it was, I'd be back home in America, wrapped up in a fuzzy blanket, watching the latest chick flicks until my heart melts.

"Are you looking to buy a horse, milady?"

The deep voice stunned me out of my daze, and I quickly searched about the stables for any other 'ladies.'

Nope. Just me.

And then there was that man, the one who likes to stare. He was watching me intently.

Well, at least he speaks a language I can understand!

"No, I don't ride."

I so hoped that the conversation would end at that. Instead, a small chuckle arose from the stranger.

"You're in Rohan, and you don't ride horses? Well, milady, I'm afraid that you've come to the wrong place. Are you lost?"

"No, no." I gave the man a small smile. "I'm just where I intend to be."

A short pause. Sigh of relief.

"Well, you certainly look out of place. Who are you waiting for?"

Inward groan of frustration.

This time, I didn't even turn to look at the man I was speaking to. "I am from out of town. It should be expected. As for my personal life, I'd prefer to keep it to myself."

If that comment doesn't get this man to leave me alone, then I don't know what will.

For a while, I thought that I was safe. The man was silent, tending to his horse. All was well, and I eagerly awaited Theodred's cousin. The sooner I got out of there, the better.

"From where in Rohan do you hail?"

Okay, please just leave me alone. "I'm not from Rohan. I am from up north."

Silence. Sweet, sweet silence. That is, until the man that I was beginning to hate began to erupt into a chuckle fit.

"What's so funny?" I eyed the man as though he was crazy. For all I knew, he was.

The man shook his head and leaned on his horse's stall door. "You humor me, milady."

My eyes stared blankly. I'm funny? What is it with these people? They drink all night, speak of Collin like a king, and when I try to be rude to someone, they laugh and call me funny? Sigh... Mom always did say that I was too kind for my own good. Perhaps I need to go home and practice my mean look in the mirror.

"How in the world do I humor you?" Please, indulge me with your knowledge, because I'm clueless.

He shrugged. "You are so unnerved by my very presence. I'm not quite used to such treatment. It's interesting."

Great, I'm glad that I humor you... "Look, sir. As I said before, I'm waiting for someone. Now, if you'll please..."

Just as this annoying prick was about to speak again, the greatest of all heroes came to my rescue.

"Brother! Are you harassing this poor woman?" A tall, slender woman with golden hair marched into the stables, giving her brother a warning, yet playful glare. She turned to me with an apologetic smile. "Ah, you must be Kristy. I remember you from Collin's films. I am Eowyn; My cousin said that I'd find you, here. You must forgive my tardiness; I only wish that I could have rescued you from my brother, sooner."

Wait... Brother? So, the annoying prick is actually a prince of Rohan... Lovely, now I've probably insulted someone of power. Lovely day!

Eowyn smiled at my panicked expression before shaking her head. "Oh, Eomer. What did you do to worry this woman, so?"

Eomer chuckled. "I believe that she has been taken by my good looks..."

"Oh, hush!" His sister rolled her eyes. "Do not worry, Kristy. He means well. He was probably just picking on you, since you are friends with Collin and Sophie-"

"On the contrary," Eomer interrupted. "I did not recognize her at all. Now that I think about it, she does look like that woman from Collin's films. Of course, I never got a good look, in the first place. Theodred was keeping the camera to himself..."

"That is enough, brother, you'll frighten her!" Eowyn gently ushered me out of the stables with a sigh. "Do not let him bother you. His personality has been corrupted by our dear friend, Sophie."

I can see that... "Yeah, Soph has a tendency to make others obnoxious..."

Eowyn's eyes widened, and she fought to smother her laughter. "You certainly aren't afraid to speak your mind!"

Oh, poop! "Oh, no, that's not what I meant! I-I'm sure that your brother is a lovely man!"

She waved me off, a small smile still playing on her lips. "I understand. He's not always so... Unnerving. Times have simply changed, and he has resolved to finding entertainment in the act of frightening others. He usually gets bored within a few days, and life goes back to normal."

Ah... I see... "When you say that times have changed... What do you mean, exactly? I have heard nothing but suspicious remarks of this place, but no one will tell me the truth. Will you humor a poor foreigner and tell me what is really going on?"

Honestly, I was beginning to regret coming here. All people do is drink- a sure sign of depression. Plus, this place is a far cry from the exciting place that Sophie and Collin once described after picking me up in Hobbiton. Even Eowyn's smile looks forced. I'm sick of the constant question in my mind- what is wrong with this place, and why won't anyone tell me?

Eowyn studied for a moment, a mixture of emotions flashing across her face. After some time, she sighed and shook her head. "Nothing is 'going on.' Nothing in particular, at least. What you see here is a mixture of the effects of Sauron's increasing power, and the result of an old and ailing king."

"Oh... And what about Grima Wormtongue?" If I had a penny for every time Sophie had something bad to say about him, I'd have... Well, a penny. She made her disgust with him quite clear once, and refused to speak about him again.

"Shh!" Eowyn stopped and looked about for anyone who might have overheard.

So we've found the root of the problem!

"Is he the reason everything's so hush-hush, around here?"

"Milady, please..." Eowyn sighed, getting paranoid. "It is not wise to speak of such things in public. Perhaps another time." She turned and started forward again. "Come, I'll show you the rest of the city."

I stared blankly at her back for a moment, jaw dropped.

Are you serious? Is something really so bad that the king's niece doesn't even have any power over it? I mean, didn't he adopt her, or something?

Oh, dear Sophie. What have you gotten me into?

(Sophie)

"Blondie... Are you okay?" I'd been watching the elf for some time, now, and his behavior was most intriguing.

And not at all like an elf.

He blinked repeatedly, his eyes focused on the darkness ahead of him. He had originally been walking up next to Gandalf, since elves can evidently see well in the dark. Then, he gradually began to fall back, closer and closer to us losers with short legs, who couldn't really keep up with the crowd.

Legolas stopped his ridiculous blinking long enough to shoot me a short glare. "Did you just refer to me as 'Blondie?'"

"Uhh... No?"

He sighed, and resumed his rapid blinking. "I am perfectly fine. It is just... This darkness seems rather... Oh, no... I just can't explain it."

"Oh no. An elf, lost for words?" I laughed. "Pippin, write this down on the calendar!"

"We don't have a calendar?"

Sigh... "It's an expression, Pip. So, what, Legolas. You're afraid of the dark?"

"No." For as quickly as he answered, I'll have to say that he's bluffing. "It is just that... I should see better than I do. There is something about this place... Perhaps there is just something in my eyes." He gently rubbed them, but to no avail. "Does this happen, often, to humans?"

"It happens to me all the time." I shrugged. "So long as you don't get all superstitious, thinking that it's the evil in this place that's making you blind, I'm good."

Legolas chuckled, and finally gave up on his attempts at supervision. "No, no. If evil could ruin my vision, then James would have made me go blind by now." Although there was a humorous smile on his face, his eyes looked down to the ground in a rather sad manner.

You know, elves have always freaked me out, but James did overreact with the whole Legolas thing... Sure, I don't want him kissing my best friend any more than James does, but he's not my friend. He and James were best friends, but James always was hot-headed...

"Have you spoken to him about it?" I asked, just a tad curious. James's constant bashing of the elf was getting tiring, and maybe it'd do the fellowship some good if things were patched up between the two.

No, it would DEFINITELY do us all good.

Legolas shook his head. "No, I have not. It seems as though he needs more time to calm down."

"If you knew James at all, you'd understand that he never calms down."

.

.

Woah...

The group went silent in awe as the great hall before us lit up. It was unlike anything I've ever seen.

Well, that's a lie. When you grow up in my world, you see lots of things. While the dwarven architecture was amazing, I have to be honest. I was more amazed that such little people could build such tall and detailed ceilings.

"How could such short dwarves build such tall arches?" Whoops. That was supposed to be an inner thought.

Gimli shot me a small glare. "You're one to talk about height, lassie."

"Honestly, Sophie! That's like asking how the Egyptians built the great pyramids!" Collin laughed. "Aliens, of course!"

And what could be more interesting to the hobbits than something foreign, such as aliens?

"What's an alien?" Pippin asked, cheerfully.

Collin's face lit up. Aliens: one of his favorite subjects."Oh, you don't have those, here? Pity. Well, it's quite simple, really..." He then proceeded to go into a long explanation as to what aliens are. Well... What he would like to think they were. Tiny, hobbit-sized green people with big, squishy eyes. And for whatever reason, he liked to make them seem as violent and malevolent as possible.

Yeah. Nice, peaceful Collin has some odd interests.

Just as Collin began to speak about alien abductions, I intervened. "Oh, Collin! You're so funny!" I smiled at the fellowship, who were wearing 'WTF' faces. "He's just kidding. Aliens aren't real." The last thing these people need is to worry about angry intergalactic beings. A gold ring is enough for them.

Gandalf, who had actually been listening to Collin's wacky stories, tapped his staff lightly on the ground to restore order. "Let us rest here, for the night."

"It's night time?" Collin looked up at the ceiling. "How can you tell?"

Gandalf sighed and gave Collin a stern look. "Well, I don't know, Collin. I am tired, we've been walking for quite some time now, and I thought that we could use the rest. But if it would please you, we can continue on..."

"No, no! I'm fine, here!"

The wizard smiled. "Good."

We all gathered together in a corner of the hall. Everyone was rather smashed together, trying to keep warm in this freezing place. Boromir looked at the hobbits, who were shivering underneath their blankets.

"Can we not afford a fire?" He asked, feeling bad for the little ones. I swear, he's gonna be a great father some day.

"No, we can not risk it." Gandalf stated simply.

Great. It's like Caradhras all over again. "I can't wait to get out of here..." Take me back to Rivendell, please.

"It should only be a little while until the end, I think." Boromir sighed. The man was the only one who wasn't freezing to death, thanks to his thick skin and his happily fur lined cloak. "Get some sleep."

That's easy for him to say. The man sleeps like a rock, and can snore like my old Uncle Roger. Plus, he's far more likely to survive an orc ambush than I am. Instead, I stared around in the darkness, hardly able to see a thing.

"I need a smoke!" Pippin groaned like an angry old man who was trying to quit smoking.

Gimli began to sing an old dwarven song, and everyone slowly began to fall asleep. Everyone except for me.

I sighed and rolled over for the hundredth time. I was huddled between Collin and James, for no one else would dare sleep near to me. They'd known me for how long, yet they couldn't sleep next to me? I'm telling you. Men these days... I like 'em a lot better than those from the old days, that's for sure.

"Sophie, dear, get some rest." Gandalf whispered gently from his spot at watch.

"I can't!" I whispered back, as I gently removed myself from Collin's bear hug. The man has a tendency to cling on to things while he sleeps, and tonight I was his unfortunate victim. "This place gives me the creeps, and I'm not tired."

Gandalf chuckled. "Oh, surely you are. You have nothing to be afraid of, dear girl. We will not see you fall."

Chyeah, it's easier to say than to believe.

"Gandalf, why'd you let me come on this trip?" Collin must have worked some magic, because I'd already prepared myself for staying in Rivendell. Heck, I could have just done what I told Kristy to do. Why shouldn't I have gone straight to Rohan? It would have worked out better, that way.

I just couldn't leave without a certain someone...

Gandalf gave me a small smile. "Our Collin is quite convincing."

"Yeah, obviously, but what did he say, exactly?"

He sighed and waved me away. "Go to sleep, Sophie."

What? "No, for real, what did he say?"

"Hardly a thing, to be quite honest."

Gandalf, dangit. Answer my question! "What reason did he give?"

Gandalf chuckled and shook his head. "The reasons he gave were not the reason I let you come. I felt as though it would be wrong to separate the two of you."

For real? "Well, we do make a pretty hardcore duo, right?" I gave myself a little pat on the back for having such an awesome friend.

But the old wizard wasn't through with confusing me. "Oh, Sophie, dear. You really are clueless, aren't you?"

"Hey, what's that supposed to mean?" That was uncalled for, sir!

"Just go to sleep, Sophie." The look in his eyes told me that there was no arguing.

So, I angrily crawled all the way back to my little bed, and stared up at the ceiling until I passed out.

Stinking wizard.

Not really eventful... So forgive me! I just wanted to get another chapter out for you guys. The next one's gonna be out, soon!

I just wanted to say how much I appreciate you readers, and how much I love your reviews. It means a lot to me, and without it, I wouldn't have continued this story for long.

I will say, that things are going to speed up very, very soon. Kristy's going to be in the story a lot more, and the Legolas-James feud will soon be explained and resolved!

If you have any suggestions, please let me know! :) I know that this story's gotten slower since the fellowship began on their journey, but I hope you guys stick with it. Like I said, things will get more exciting in the next few chapters! I always HATE writing the fellowship storyline, because I don't like changing anything, but I don't like repeating anything.

So. Anyways.

Thanks for reading, and please review!