A/N: Thank you for all the reviews and fave/follows on this story - I do apologize for the update of this being so late, but I wanted to get the majority of the story finished and the last few chapters have been really tiring to write and I have also been battling a horrid cold! However I can pretty much say I now have done, with the exceptions of a few little bits needed to add here and there.
That being said though, it should by the end of it; tie up things quite nicely however! And there are also a few more one shots that are written as well or near completion that I will get up soon as well, that fall into this story.
So this chapter sees more of all of them - and how they all adjust to two more of their friends entering the scary world of being parents.
And of course there are some sweet moments with all 3 couples (I can say that now!), as well as some sibling moments with Mikki, Kitty and Ryder.
So anyway please enjoy this extra long chapter and you all know what to do at the end, review and if not fave/follow!
And quickly before I go, it's awesome to see America have now made it LEGAL in every state for same sex couples to marry! Come on Australia, it's your turn now - I want my friends, no matter what their sexual preference is to have the same rights as everyone else! So let's legalize it already! Happy on this day of American Pride!
Love to you all,
KJ xoxoxoxo
Chapter 62 -
As two weeks since Mikki had given birth to the twins drew closer; Blaine had to head back to work since he had only managed to get a short amount of time off.
This meant during the day, Mikki was left to look after the twins solely on her own; and it was something she was finding increasing difficult, since when one was awake the other would sleep, and when they would both happen to be awake; they would want either to be held or to be fed and it was an increasingly hard thing for her to manage considering there was two of them and not just one.
After a particularly hard day with Mason and Madison, who had just not being in the most cooperative moods at all; Mikki had the two baby carriers on the coffee table, where each of the twins were crying and fussing about something Mikki just wasn't sure of; since neither of them needed changing, feeding or sleep; and if she held one she would have to hold the other.
The apartment door opened and Blaine, who had stopped by the grocery store on the way home to grab some things that they needed, walked in.
"Hey, what's going on?" he asked. "I could hear Mas and Madi crying as I got up the stairs"
Mikki looked to him as he put his bag down from work and the bag of groceries on the table and then walked over to where she and the twins were.
"Hi Blaine, lovely to see you too" said Mikki, sarcastically.
Blaine looked at her with a smile. "I'm sorry sweetie, hi"
"Yeah hi" replied Mikki, with a sigh.
"So what's wrong here?" asked Blaine, looking at her and then their twins.
"They just won't stop crying today, no matter what I do" replied Mikki.
Blaine looked at her and the twins, and unclipped Madison's carrier straps and picked up his daughter, since she was the one who was crying the most, out of her carrier.
"Hey my sweet girl" said Blaine as he sat down on the sofa next to Mikki and placed a kiss to her head. "Why all the tears and crying"
Madison stopped her crying and looked at Blaine, and he gave a smile.
"Did you just want a cuddle, huh?" asked Blaine, looking down at her.
Madison reached her hand up and Blaine took it, gently placing kisses to it.
"Yeah, that's what you wanted" said Blaine with a smile and looked at Mikki. "Did you think about holding them?"
"No of course not Blaine" replied Mikki, in a scoff. "I just thought I will let them cry all day"
"Don't get mad at me" said Blaine. "I was only asking a simple question"
"Yes, well since our children clearly seem to like spending time with you over me, then you can deal with them both for the rest of the night" said Mikki, standing up.
"Michi, don't say that" said Blaine. "Of course they love you"
"Right" said Mikki, as she got Mason out of his carrier. "Because they just keep on crying even when I try and hold them"
Mason continued to whimper and cry a little as Mikki held him.
"They hate me" said Mikki, as she passed Mason over to Blaine.
"No they don't" replied Blaine as he took his son also in one of his arms and the little boy immediately stopped his fussing.
"See" said Mikki, pointing to both Blaine and their twins. "They hate me"
"Well maybe they're sensing you're stressed" replied Blaine. "And that's what making them upset"
"Stressed" replied Mikki, with a laugh. "I'm stressed"
"Mich, don't" said Blaine. "Don't start taking what I am guessing a bad day out on me"
Mikki looked at him and laughed.
"You know this is why as a teenager I never wanted to get married" she replied. "Because the thought of having to deal with babies and their constant needs and wants, was not something I wanted"
"You don't mean that" said Blaine, looking at his wife.
"Yeah, I do" she replied, and walked into their bedroom.
Blaine sighed as he looked at his son and daughter in his arms, both who were now happy and quiet and had both stopped fussing and crying.
"Momma doesn't mean that" he said, placing a kiss to both their heads. "She's just a little tired I think"
The apartment door opened and Ryder, who was still dressed in his work clothes, walked in.
"Hey bro in law" said Ryder, as he closed the door.
Blaine looked over to him and smiled. "Hey man"
"Mik not here?" asked Ryder.
"Yeah, she is" replied Blaine, with a nod. "She's just in our room, kind of in a mood"
"Mood?" asked Ryder as he walked over to the sofa and sat down.
Blaine nodded. "Yeah, both Madi and Mas were crying when I got home a few minutes ago, and I don't know Mik just said today they weren't being good"
"Can I?" asked Ryder, gesturing to Mason in Blaine's arm.
"Yeah go ahead" replied Blaine, with a nod and Ryder took his nephew from Blaine.
"Did you make your mommy have a bad day, huh?" asked Ryder with a laugh, looking at his nephew.
"Whatever it was I'm sure it wasn't deliberate" said Blaine.
"Yeah, maybe they missed you not being here as well since you've been leaving every day this week" said Ryder.
Blaine nodded. "I wish I didn't have to go believe me. But kind of need to work"
"I know what you mean" replied Ryder. "So now probably isn't a good time to ask Mik for some artwork help then?"
"Probably not" replied Blaine. "But then again right now I am not sure what frame of mind she is in"
"Believe me not is probably the best option now" said Ryder. "I know what my sister is like when she gets in a mood"
"Yeah I know as well" replied Blaine, with a laugh. "I can tell her you wanted to talk though and maybe when she is up to it later she can head across the hall and see you"
"That be good" replied Ryder, with a nod.
"Okay, well I should maybe organise something for me and Mikki to eat, since clearly she hasn't" said Blaine.
"You don't want me to stay and help you out?" asked Ryder.
"No man it's cool, thanks for the offer though" replied Blaine.
Ryder nodded and put Mason back into a carrier.
"Uh that one is Madi's" said Blaine, with a laugh.
"Well it's not like one is screaming with pink, for me to know that" said Ryder, with a laugh as he placed his nephew into what was his carrier.
"No, but I kind of think pink elephant might have been a give a way there" said Blaine.
"Yeah" replied Ryder as he fastened the straps in the carrier. "I'll catch you later. Let me know if can do anything to help"
"Sure man, thanks" said Blaine, looking to his brother and law with a smile.
"Later" replied Ryder and headed out of the apartment and back over across the hall to his.
Blaine looked at his daughter in his arms, who now seemed quite content and he placed a kiss to her forehead before her putting her in her carrier.
"Okay my sweet angel" he said, clipping her in. "Daddy will go and check on Mommy and then make a start on getting something together for dinner"
Blaine looked at Mason to make sure he was okay, and now seemed to be that he was and then quickly headed into his and Mikki's room to talk with her before making a start on their evening meal for that night.
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The next day, even though he didn't want to; especially since Mikki was still in somewhat of a bad mood with him about things he didn't even really know, Blaine headed to work.
They spoke over breakfast, and on the way to work he rang Kitty and ask her if she was able to go around to their apartment for the day and see if she was able to get Mikki out of the mood that she was in.
Around ten o'clock that morning, armed with some coffee and muffins from Kurt's shop; Kitty got to her sister and brother in laws apartment and with her free hand, knocked on the door.
Mikki who was sitting on the sofa, flicking through the television channels whilst Madison and Mason were down for a sleep, got up and went over to the apartment door and opened it.
"Hey sis" said Kitty, when she saw her sister open the door.
"Hey Kit" replied Mikki as she held the door open. "Wasn't expecting you"
"Well I thought maybe you could do with some company today" replied Kitty.
Mikki nodded as Kitty walked in and she closed the door behind her sister.
"Did Blaine call you and ask you to come over?" asked Mikki.
"No, of course not" replied Kitty, shaking her head.
Mikki looked at her sister with raised eyebrows.
"Okay maybe he did" replied Kitty. "But before you say anything, I was going to come over today and hang out with you"
"Oh well gee thanks" said Mikki. "Finally remembered why you were in New York now to begin with?"
"Don't start with me, Mik" said Kitty as she went over to the kitchen table and placed the coffees and muffins down.
"Sorry, I'm just tired that's all" replied Mikki, as she went and sat at the kitchen table.
"Well that's to be expected" said Kitty as she too sat down, and handed Mikki a coffee. "Your usual"
"Thanks" replied Mikki, taking it from her sister. "I just didn't get much sleep last night, and asking Blaine to get up as well and help when he has work, I don't want to do that and make him tired"
"I'm sure he wouldn't object though" said Kitty.
"I know" replied Mikki, with a nod. "Just when one gets back to sleep the other one is waking up, and it's just I kind of wish they would both sleep at the same time"
"That would be too much to ask for though right" said Kitty, with a laugh.
"Yeah, I guess" replied Mikki as she took a sip of her coffee. "Hmm this is good, I've missed coffee"
Kitty laughed. "Figured it would give you an energy boost as well"
Mikki nodded.
"So where are my little niece and nephew?" asked Kitty.
"At the moment, both sleeping" replied Mikki. "Or at least they were, like half hour ago"
"Okay, well since they are sleeping, why don't you go and get some rest as well" said Kitty.
Mikki looked at her sister and shook her head. "No it's fine"
"Seriously Mik" said Kitty. "You look terrible"
"Well gee thanks Kit" replied Mikki.
"I don't mean like that" said Kitty. "You just look like you could do with a few hours of sleep"
"One of the twins will be up soon, no doubt wanting feeding or changing or both. So thanks for the idea, but I can't sleep" replied Mikki.
"Mik, if they wake. I'll deal with it" said Kitty. "I have babysat before"
"They're in mine and Blaine's room, so I'll hear when they stir anyway" said Mikki.
"Maybe you will, maybe you won't" replied Kitty. "If you tell yourself that I'm here and will handle it when you go and rest, that will maybe allow you to get some sleep"
Mikki looked at her sister.
"Trust me on this okay" said Kitty, reaching out and placing her hand over that of her sisters.
"Okay" replied Mikki, as she took another sip of coffee.
"And also as well, if you want" said Kitty, looking at her sister and then grabbing her handbag and pulling out a business card from it. "This is a friend of mine, Jane. She was a year ahead of me at college and she works as a psychiatrist, and I was thinking maybe you would want to talk with her"
"Why are you suggesting I go and see a shrink?" asked Mikki, looking at her sister.
"Well I actually said to her if she was free, that maybe you could go and talk with her tomorrow" replied Kitty.
"You booked me into some shrink" said Mikki.
"Don't get mad, please" replied Kitty, looking at her sister. "I just thought maybe you would feel more comfortable talking with someone you don't know about anything you are feeling and all that right now"
"Mad, Kitty. You're suggesting I see someone for what exactly?" asked Mikki.
"You kind of have some signs of PPD" replied Kitty.
"PPD" said Mikki.
"Post Partum Depression" replied Kitty, with a nod.
"Okay and this is your expert opinion" said Mikki.
"Well no" replied Kitty. "Because it's not exactly my area of expertise"
"Then you can't comment on what you think I may or may not have" said Mikki.
"True, I can't" replied Kitty. "But I'm just giving you an option in talking with Jane tomorrow if you wish, you don't have to though. It's just there if you want"
Mikki looked at her sister. "Kind of hard to actually go anywhere myself these days on my own"
"I'll stay here with the twins if you do" replied Kitty. "Just think about it please, and Jane won't be annoyed if you decide not to go and talk with her"
"Okay" replied Mikki. "I'll think about it. Thank you"
Kitty nodded. "Now finish your coffee or not if you don't feel like it, and go and get some rest please"
Mikki looked at her sister and shook her head.
"Mik, just let yourself relax okay" said Kitty, looking at her sister as she yawned.
"I really want to believe me" replied Mikki. "But it's like my brain won't let me, because it's constantly thinking what if one them needs something, and I can't do it"
"Right" replied Kitty. "And that is why today I am here, so you don't have to"
Mikki looked at her sister.
"If you don't feel like sleeping, go and take a long relaxing bath" said Kitty.
"Hmm, that would be nice" said Mikki with a nod.
"Well go to that, Mouse" said Kitty, looking at her. "And then if you want to have a lie down after that then do that also"
"Hmm, that does sound like a good idea" replied Mikki, with a small sigh.
"Okay, you go run yourself a bath" said Kitty. "And whilst you do that, I will hopefully quietly and gently move each of the bassinets into the spare room here and then that way if you do want some sleep, Madi and Mas won't disturb you"
Mikki nodded as she stood up. "Thanks Kit, that sounds like an awesome idea"
"Yeah" replied Kitty, as she stood also.
"I'll be in there" said Mikki, pointing to the bathroom. "If you need anything"
"Okay, but don't worry, I got this" replied Kitty, with a smile.
Mikki nodded and then headed to the bathroom to run herself a bath and Kitty finished off her coffee quickly before she quietly and gently set about moving Madison and Mason into the spare room for a while, in the hopes that Mikki would maybe be able to get some rest.
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The next day, Rachel had texted Mikki earlier that morning and asked her if she had some things for making Elisabeth a headband in a color that she wanted to match a dress she had gotten for her. Mikki had told her she wasn't sure exactly what she had, but that she was more than welcome to come around and check out if anything she saw was suitable.
Kitty had already gotten to the apartment, before Blaine had left for the morning, and he thanked her for talking with Mikki yesterday and also helping her to get a little rest as well.
Around eleven, the apartment door opened, and Rachel walked in with Elisabeth in her arms and Jayden next to her.
"Can I play with them?" asked Jayden, rushing over to Mikki who was sitting at the kitchen table feeding Mason from a bottle.
"They're still a little too young buddy" replied Mikki, looking to him. "I'm sorry"
"Jay, sweetie" said Rachel. "Remember we talked about this, you can't ask Aunt Mikki every time when you can play with them"
"Okay" replied Jayden, looking to Rachel with a nod.
"Give them another couple of months" said Kitty, looking to Jayden. "When they start maybe crawling and that, Aunt Mikki might invite you around to help keep an eye on them"
"I can do that" replied Jayden, happily.
"You've got yourself a deal" said Mikki, looking to her little cousin with a smile.
"So you're doing okay?" asked Rachel, looking to her friend as she sat down.
Mikki looked at her and nodded. "Better then yesterday and the day before, yeah"
"It's hard getting use to having one and an older one to look after" said Rachel. "I can't even begin to imagine how it would be having two babies at once"
"Tiring, stressful, I could go on" replied Mikki, with a laugh as Mason finished off the bottle he was drinking and she put it down on the table, before burping her young son.
"So you don't mind me raiding your craft stuff then?" asked Rachel.
Mikki looked at her and shook her head. "I have more than enough, and if there isn't anything you like there, I can probably find it for you"
"Yes and what was it that your husband was saying this morning" said Kitty, looking to her sister.
"I have enough ribbon and that" said Mikki with a laugh.
"Exactly" replied Kitty, with a nod.
Mikki shook her head. "Believe me I don't have enough, seen so many more pretties"
"Well hopefully I will find what I want in what you have" said Rachel with a laugh. "I don't want Blaine being mad at me for making you buy more stuff"
Mikki laughed. "I just buy him video games and he's happy"
"I think it's safe to say you pretty much have him wrapped around your finger" said Rachel.
"I do" replied Mikki, with a nod as she stood up and went over to where Mason's carrier was and placed him in it, and then grabbed a box that was near the sofa. "So this is probably what you are looking at wanting to use"
"You expect me to make the headband I want?" asked Rachel, looking at her friend as she placed it on the table.
"Well yeah, if you're wanting it today" replied Mikki. "I have that appointment Kitty has set up for me"
"Okay, I'm not even sure if I would know how to make it though" said Rachel.
"YouTube, I'll leave my tablet here for you and once you decide what stuff you like just look at different things to make on there with them" replied Mikki.
Rachel nodded. "I guess I can try"
"Oh and there is also my Pinterest as well, heaps of tutorials linked on there so you can just look under hair accessories board" replied Mikki.
"Okay, well can you help me until you're ready to go?" asked Rachel.
"Sure" replied Mikki with a nod. "Well at least until Madi wakes up from her sleep"
Rachel laughed and placed Elisabeth down on the ground and gave her some of her toys from the bag that she had with her, and then along with Mikki and Kitty sat down at the kitchen table and got a start on making some headbands for her daughter.
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Since she had a bit time of until her appointment with Jane, Mikki headed to the coffee shop to grab herself a cup of coffee.
Walking into the shop and then heading over to the counter, Mikki smiled as she saw Kurt standing at the coffee machine as he usually was, busily making up the orders for customers.
"Hey Kurt" she said, as she sat on one of the empty stools at the counter.
Kurt looked up at her and smiled. "Oh hey Mik, long time no see"
Mikki gave a laugh. "Yeah, could I grab my regular?"
"Your regular?" asked Kurt. "Is that your recent regular or your old regular?"
"My old regular" replied Mikki. "I can now drink coffee again"
"Okay, sure one of the best coffees you have ever had coming right up" said Kurt.
"Thank you" replied Mikki, with a laugh, as Kurt handed the coffees he had just made to another customer and then made a start on Mikki's.
"So you don't have the twins on you?" asked Kurt, seeing that Mikki was indeed on her own now.
"No" replied Mikki shaking her head. "They're back at the apartment"
Kurt looked at her in horror. "You left them in the apartment on their, to come down here and get coffee?"
"No, of course not" replied Mikki, shaking her head.
"Oh thank god for that, you had me worried there for a moment, and I was thinking how do I call up Blaine at work and tell him that you've lost the plot or something" said Kurt.
Mikki laughed. "Kitty is looking after them for me. So I can have some me time and I also have an appointment, so it was just easier for her to stay with them"
Kurt nodded as he frothed some milk. "Okay, but still I was worried there for a moment"
"Yeah" replied Mikki.
"So it's all going okay then?" asked Kurt.
"Admit it's not as easy as I thought it would be, having two is hard work. But it's okay" replied Mikki.
"Well I'm sure you know the hard part is still yet to come, right" said Kurt. "You're going to have one day two teenagers at the exact same age"
"Hmm, I know. And if me as a teenager anything to go by, then Blaine and I are in for a hell of a ride" replied Mikki with a laugh as Kurt poured the frothed milk into the cup and went over to Mikki.
"There we go" he said handing her the cup. "The best ever coffee you will ever have"
Mikki laughed, and went to grab some money out of her bag. "Thanks Kurt"
"And don't you even think about paying for it" said Kurt, looking at her. "It's on the house, like always"
"You're sure?" asked Mikki. "I can't ask you to keep giving me free coffee especially when I'm not even working on any of your stuff at the moment"
"Still on the house" replied Kurt, with a smile. "Just as long as next time you promise to bring in those gorgeous babies of yours, so I can have a cuddle"
"Sure" replied Mikki, with a laugh. "It's a deal"
"Good" said Kurt, with a smile as he wiped down the coffee machine.
"Yeah" replied Mikki. "Well I should get going to my appointment, so thank you for the coffee and I will see you later"
"Sure later Mikki" said Kurt, and Mikki left the coffee shop and then headed off for her appointment.
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Mikki got to the appointment that she had with Jane, and was sitting in the waiting room flicking through one of the magazines that was there, when the door to Jane's office opened, and a black girl with curly short hair pulled back into a ponytail walked out.
"Mikki" she said, looking over to where she was sitting.
Mikki looked up and nodded. "Yes hi"
"Come on in" said Jane.
"Sure thanks" replied Mikki, standing up and placing the magazine down and heading into the office.
Jane closed the door behind them, and headed over to her chair in the office. "Take a seat Mikki"
"Okay" replied Mikki, as she went and sat on the sofa that was in the office. "Thanks"
"So it's actually really nice to meet you, Kitty told me so much about you when we were in college" said Jane.
Mikki looked at her and laughed. "Well whatever it is that she told you, I'm sure half of it wasn't true"
Jane laughed also. "Well I don't know do I. But what I do is know is what Kitty filled me in on yesterday"
Mikki nodded.
"So you've just had twins?" asked Jane.
"Yeah, eighteen days ago" replied Mikki.
"Okay" replied Jane. "So I'm not sure if Kitty kind of gave you a clue as to why she asked me to talk with you, but how about we start from how you know your husband; Kitty didn't go into much detail there and I just want to sort of get a perspective and see what you're possibly feeling here"
"Umm sure" replied Mikki. "I guess we can start there"
"Okay, well when you're ready" said Jane.
Mikki nodded. "So Blaine, that's the husband"
"Yes, Kitty did mention his name to me" said Jane.
"We've been together a little over two years now, and that is as in actually together. We got engaged six months after we started dating, and married four months after that" replied Mikki.
"Wow, I didn't know it was that quick" said Jane, as she wrote some things down in a book that she was sitting with.
Mikki nodded. "Yeah, but we'd known each other for at least five years, and we were friends"
Jane looked at nodded.
"Blaine went to college with my cousin Puck, and we met at his first wedding to his wife that turned out to be a lesbian" said Mikki.
"Blaine or your cousin's wedding?" asked Jane.
"My cousin" replied Mikki, with a nod.
"Okay, just wanting to make sure" replied Jane, with a laugh.
Mikki nodded. "Anyway Blaine and I we got to talking after that on Facebook and when I moved to New York I lived with Puck and his first wife Santana for a bit, and Blaine as well who lived with them, until he moved across the hall, where he lived until we started dating and then he moved back into the apartment that was now solely mine, since Puck and Santana had left, and she was also by that point divorced from Puck and married to Dani, who is female obviously if she is a lesbian"
"Okay, I think I'm following" said Jane.
"So how did you and Blaine come to be together?" asked Jane.
"Umm at Puck's second wedding, that really didn't end up being a wedding because he said the wrong name at the altar" replied Mikki.
"I really think Kitty has not been telling me important stuff here, because this is kind of intriguing to hear" said Jane.
"Yeah, well you'll have to talk with her about that" replied Mikki, with a laugh.
"Yes, and here I thought she was a friend. After all the nights of endless study in college" said Jane.
Mikki laughed. "I'm sure she's just been busy"
"Haven't we all" replied Jane. "So how did you and Blaine come about, because I am thinking it's got something to do with the wedding, or not wedding"
"Well, I kind of got into a funk at the rehearsal dinner; because here I was at my cousin's wedding again, and it wasn't like I hadn't been to other friends weddings also over a period of time; and it got me to thinking that I would never find that person who I would want to spend the rest of my life with me" said Mikki.
"I hear you there" replied Jane. "It's finding them that is the hard part"
Mikki nodded. "Blaine and I got to talking at one point and I apparently rambled on about not ever finding my prince charming. I went back to my hotel room not long after as he took away my alcohol which was probably a good thing and later on he came to check on me make sure I was okay, and well things kind of went from there and we ended up sleeping with one another that night"
"But it obviously turned out to be more than a onetime thing" said Jane.
Mikki nodded. "I guess there was always something between me and Blaine, this weird chemistry or vibe from the start; because we'd always tease one another or annoy the other person"
"Well they do say that some of the best marriages come out of friendship" said Jane.
"Yeah, and we click really well. We always have and I guess that's what makes us work" replied Mikki.
"So you got married then almost a year and a half ago" said Jane.
"Uh huh" replied Mikki.
"And married nine months before you became pregnant" said Jane.
"Actually I was pregnant, before I was pregnant with the twins" replied Mikki.
"You had a miscarriage?" asked Jane.
"Yeah, I was only about nine weeks" replied Mikki with a nod.
"How long before you got pregnant again?" asked Jane, as she wrote some things down.
"Six months or thereabouts" said Mikki. "And I guess I was kind of fearful throughout that pregnancy that something could happen, especially when we found out it was twins"
"That's to be expected" replied Jane with a nod.
Mikki nodded. "And considering I was told kind of half way through to maybe take it easy and all that, that kind of played on my mind as well"
"So you were always thinking something could happen in the back of your mind" said Jane.
"I was, yeah" replied Mikki. "And then when it actually came to the twins being born and having to have an emergency cesarean section, because the umbilical cord was around Mason's neck. It was scary"
"It would have been" said Jane.
"Then dying after they we both born, it's kind of scary to know that I could not even be here right now" said Mikki. "Because I died. Wow, I died. That's the first time I actually have comprehended that, I died"
"So up until now, you hadn't thought of it in that sense of not ever being here again?" asked Jane.
"No" replied Mikki, as she started to cry slightly. "I've never actually said those words out loud or even really thought about it, but I did die"
"Do you think that maybe could be what has been making you feel the way you have been?" asked Jane.
"I guess" replied Mikki. "I don't really know"
"I think it could be what is holding you back from really connecting with your twins, because down somewhere inside of you even though you don't realise it, there is this little voice that is saying to you those exact words to you"
Mikki nodded. "How do I make it stop?"
"Well I think having actually come out and said those words now. Might make it stop, but I can't hold any promises" replied Jane.
"So you're not wanting to send me off to the loony bin then or prescribe me some meds for anything" said Mikki.
Jane shook her head. "No neither of those, because I think rather than being depression like I first maybe thought it was; it was more a fear of what could have maybe been or even happen in the future"
Mikki nodded her head, and then continued to talk with Jane some more before she left, thanking her and promising that she did ever need to talk again that she would call her and make sure that she did get those worrying thoughts out in the open where they would not be able to make her feel that way anymore.
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After having finished up with Jane, and feeling a lot better after they had spoken; Mikki rang Kitty who said she was more than happy to keep looking after the twins for the rest of the day; especially since Rachel was also there, if Mikki was wanting to have just a little more time to herself.
Therefore Mikki did a spot of shopping, and bought some new baby clothes for both Madison and Mason; even though they probably didn't need anything new, and then she messaged Blaine and told him that she would grab some takeout for them for dinner that night.
Mikki got back to the apartment block and headed up to the floor that was the location of hers and Blaine's, and adjusted the bags she had into one hand and then opened the apartment door.
Blaine was inside along with Kitty and now also Ryder, the three of them sitting on the sofa; with Blaine holding one baby and Kitty the other.
"Hi" said Blaine as she walked in.
"Hi" replied Mikki, with a smile as she closed the apartment front door and went over to the kitchen table placing her bags down on it.
"Everything go okay?" asked Kitty, as she stood up and went over to Mikki.
Mikki nodded as she saw that it was Madison that her sister had a hold of, and took her daughter from her arms. "It did, yeah. I think talking to someone who I felt wasn't judging me was good"
"That's good" replied Kitty with a nod. "I knew you'd be able to feel comfortable with Jane"
"Yeah thank you" replied Mikki, wrapping her free arm around her sister's waist and pecking a kiss to her cheek.
"Sure anything for my fave sister" said Kitty, with a smile.
"I'm your only sister" replied Mikki, with a laugh.
"Well yes" said Kitty, with a nod. "But Ry can act like a girl sometimes, so it can feel as if I have two"
"Hey, I'm right here" said Ryder, where he was over sitting in the armchair still.
"Yep, I know" replied Kitty, with a smile to him.
"Well thank you both for today honestly" said Mikki. "And I know it's probably not enough to repay you both, but I grabbed you both some takeout as well"
"Really, you got us food" said Ryder, standing up and going over to where his two sisters were.
Mikki nodded as she picked up the bag that she knew had the fave takeouts of her brother and sister in it. "Yep"
"Okay, best sister ever" said Ryder as he took the bag.
"Excuse me?" asked Kitty, looking to her brother.
"Well when was the last time you bought me dinner?" asked Ryder, looking at her.
"You have your own money, so why would I buy you dinner" replied Kitty.
"Okay, do me a favor go and argue in Ry's apartment, and leave me and Blaine, and our babies in peace without having to put up with the two of you squabbling" said Mikki.
"Sure, I'll come and see you tomorrow morning before I head to the airport" said Kitty.
Mikki nodded. "No problem sis, and don't you two have a loud party over there. Blaine and I don't want to be calling the cops on you"
"Yeah because I'm really going to party with Kitty" said Ryder, with a laugh.
"Oh you could not keep up with me, baby brother" replied Kitty, with a smile.
"Catch you guys later, and thanks for today, both of you" said Blaine.
Kitty and Ryder looked over to their brother in law. "Sure anytime, know where I am"
"And I'm just a call away from tomorrow" said Kitty.
"Thanks" said Blaine, with a nod.
"Bye, have a good night" said Kitty.
"We will" replied Mikki.
"Later sis" said Ryder, and he and Kitty left the apartment.
Mikki picked up the bag of takeout that she had gotten for Blaine and herself and then headed over to where Blaine was with Mason.
"Hi" replied Blaine, standing and placing a kiss to Mikki's lips.
Mikki looked at him and smiled. "Hi"
"So you're feeling a little bit better?" asked Blaine, approaching the subject carefully.
Mikki nodded. "Yeah, I think talking with someone who wasn't at all judging and kind of knew from more of a clinical aspect what I was feeling, was a good thing, and Jane said any time I want to talk to her again, I can call her"
"Well you know you can always talk with me too, no matter what" said Blaine.
"I know sweetie" replied Mikki with a nod. "Just the feeling of somewhat helplessness and not being able to cope, because I hadn't really come to terms with the fact that I did die during labor; I didn't want you thinking I was a bad mom"
"I would never think that, syota" replied Blaine.
"I know you wouldn't" said Mikki, with a smile. "Just it made me feel as if I was a failure at this whole parenting thing"
"Neither of us are use to this yet, Mich" said Blaine, as he placed Mason back into his carrier.
"Yeah well we weren't expecting twins on our first go as this parenting thing" said Mikki, with a laugh as she also put Madison into her carrier.
"No we were not" replied Blaine, shaking his head as he sat down. "But any future kids, we're going to be totally and utterly prepared and ready for, because we will have this whole thing down"
"Future kids" replied Mikki, with a laugh as she sat down and looked at him.
"Yeah" said Blaine. "You haven't thought about more?"
"At the moment, definitely no" replied Mikki with a laugh. "My body still hasn't got back to being like it was after these two, so another is a long way off"
"You know I think you look amazing, don't you" said Blaine, kissing her.
"You have to say that" replied Mikki.
Blaine shook his head. "I'm saying it because it's true, 'kay. You look amazing, so what if you have a few lumps and bumps here and there, it means that there is more of you for me to love"
Mikki laughed and kissed him. "I love you"
"Love you too" replied Blaine.
"Yeah" replied Mikki. "And what I said the other night about not wanting to have gotten married or have had the twins, that was just the anxiety and that speaking. I don't feel that way at all really, I am glad we got married and so glad for our beautiful babies"
"I know sweetie, you don't have to apologize" said Blaine. "I must admit that it did hurt, to hear you say that though"
"I'm sorry" replied Mikki, hugging and kissing him.
"But I also know that this is has been a lot for both of us to come to deals with" said Blaine.
Mikki just nodded, as she hugged Blaine.
"We just need to talk to one another when we're feeling low or anything" said Blaine. "We're in this together"
"We are" replied Mikki, with a nod.
"And I've spoken with work as well, and from next semester I will be doing three days instead of the full of five" said Blaine.
"Really?" asked Mikki, looking at him. "How did you manage that?"
"Well a few of my days I have gaps in my schedule, where I don't have classes. So I spoke with the dean of music and told him that I didn't want to miss all the milestones of our babies, and asked if I could take the free slots I had and put the classes there if it would be no trouble with the other classes and teacher schedules, and he checked it all out, said it would be fine and so as of next semester, Wednesday and Friday I will be here home with you and our little ones" said Blaine.
Mikki looked at him and smiled and kissed him. "Sweetie, that's awesome"
"Hmm, is it" replied Blaine, with a nod. "We get a three day weekend, so that means sometimes we can even maybe go away with them for a little trip, take them to see your parents or maybe even mine"
"Yeah" replied Mikki, with a smile. "But I will be going back to work soon as well, and still have to work out how all that will work out, because I don't think I like the idea of day care and them being able to pick up all sort of nasty bugs and that"
"But that's a long way, a way. Six months right and even then you said part time to the others" said Blaine.
Mikki nodded. "Uh huh, but like you said we will work it all that out when we get to that point of time. Right now I just want to enjoy spending time with you and them"
"Yeah" said Blaine. "Now how about we eat this food before it gets cold and we need to be getting the twins to bed"
"Hmm, good idea" replied Mikki, with a smile. "And then we can get some sleep as well"
"Definitely" replied Blaine, with a laugh and the two of them continued to talk whilst they ate their dinner.
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That same evening Rachel and Puck were sitting at the kitchen table with a huge sheet of paper laid out in front of them, trying to work out the seating arrangements for their upcoming wedding; after having sorted out most of the other stuff like who would be bridesmaids for Rachel; that being Mikki, Brittany, Kitty and Puck's sister Sara, and the groomsman for Puck; being Jake, Blaine, Sam and Ryder, and confirmed this all with them; therefore only thing left since the ceremony and reception was going to be held at their house, was working out the logistics of it all, and where everything would go on the day.
"So I think I like the seating like this" said Puck.
Rachel looked at their diagram and nodded. "Yeah and our parents and Jay and Elisabeth can be here, along with Mikki's mom and dad and the twins"
"Close to the wedding table but not too close" said Puck.
"Uh huh" replied Rachel.
"Okay, and what about how we sit up here" said Puck, grabbing a pencil and marking up on where they had the wedding table drawn. "Obviously we sit side by side"
"Obviously" replied Rachel, with a laugh and kissed him.
Puck laughed. "Yeah, but do we want to be having guys on my side and the girls on your side, or do it some other way?"
"Well it's almost impossible to separate Blaine and Mikki at any time" replied Rachel. "And of course Britts and Sam are now dating also"
"Yeah, so maybe we do this then" said Puck, marking names on the paper. "Put Blaine and Mikki to my side, Britts and Sam to yours"
"Okay, yeah that could work" replied Rachel, with a nod. "And what about the other four?"
"I say put Kitty and Jake to yours, and Ry and Sara to mine" said Puck. "That way we each have an even spread of the crazy family you're going to be marrying in too"
Rachel looked at him and laughed. "Your family is not that crazy"
"Oh come on they totally are" replied Puck. "You've met them all"
"Yes" said Rachel, with a nod. "And I totally love that they are crazy. I didn't have any siblings or close relationships with my cousins growing up, so it's nice to see you have this with yours"
"Hmm, and soon they are going to be your crazy family too" said Puck.
"Yeah, I can't wait" replied Rachel.
"Me either, babe" said Puck quickly kissing her.
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Sam and Brittany were lying in her bed, watching a movie on the television she had in there; Alicia between the two of them.
Brittany stopped the disc as the movie came to an end, and looked at Sam.
"I hope Mikki's doing okay after her appointment today" said Brittany, as she looked to him.
"I think she will be, I guess just the whole getting use to the mother thing was a little daunting" said Sam.
Brittany nodded.
"I know that my mom had a hard time when the twins were born, it's hard to get use to" continued Sam.
"Yeah, and it was nice of you to let Kitty spend the night in your apartment" said Brittany.
"Well I did have an ulterior motive" replied Sam, with a laugh and leaned over to Brittany and kissed her.
Alicia moved from where she was sitting, and looked at Sam with a look of annoyance on her face.
"And clearly Alicia is not impressed with the ulterior motive" said Brittany, with a laugh as she jumped off the bed.
"Guess not" replied Sam, with a laugh of his own. "But as least I can now do this" he continued and kissed Brittany.
"Yes, you can" replied Brittany, kissing him back.
"So you ever thought about having kids?" asked Sam, as he stopped kissing her and looked at Brittany.
"If that's your way of asking me if I will have kids you with Sam Evans, then it's less a less then romantic way to go about it" replied Brittany with a laugh.
"Well I don't mean like right now" replied Sam. "But have you ever thought about then?"
Brittany nodded. "Yeah of course, and one say I would love to have my own"
"Okay cool" replied Sam.
"And maybe that person I possibly have them with could be you" said Brittany with a smile and quickly kissed him.
"Really now?" asked Sam.
Brittany nodded. "Of course you would have prove yourself worthy to be that person"
"Oh and how do I go about doing that?" asked Sam, with a smile.
"I can think of a few ways, and one way you can prove to me right now" said Brittany.
"I think I can agree with that" replied Sam, with a smile and quickly kissed her; before getting down to proving what sort of guy he could really be.
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Kitty and Ryder were in his and Sam's apartment, watching an old episode of a reality tv show as they ate the Chinese takeout that Mikki had gotten them.
"I seriously don't know how those girls manage to get themselves out of bed in the morning" said Kitty as she watched the show, where two of the girls on it were having an discussion about the possible ways for her to fall pregnant.
"Yet here we are watching it" said Ryder.
"Yes" replied Kitty. "And because I work as a guidance counselor at a high school, sadly it's something I hear all the time, girls who actually think like that"
"They think they can get pregnant via a hot tub" said Ryder.
Kitty looked at her brother and nodded. "Yep"
"Oh man, that's just, wow" said Ryder. "Are they listening in health class?"
"I don't know" replied Kitty with a laugh.
Ryder shook his head as he grabbed another dumpling.
"So you promise to keep an eye on Mik when I'm gone?" asked Kitty.
"I don't think she needs keeping an eye on Kitty Kat" replied Ryder, looking at his sister.
"Well I don't mean, like always watching her or something like that" said Kitty. "But just making sure she is coping okay, and calling me if you see she isn't at any time"
Ryder nodded. "Yeah of course"
"Okay thank you" replied Kitty.
"You know there is another way, for you to do that" said Ryder.
Kitty looked at him as she grabbed the remaining teriyaki chicken. "How?"
"Well you move to New York" replied Ryder. "I know you'd love being closer to Mik and Blaine and seeing the twins grow"
"And closer to you, baby brother?" asked Kitty, with a laugh.
Ryder shook his head. "No, I'd actually hate having you around all the time. Mik's bad enough"
Kitty laughed. "As much as I would love to be in New York and closer. It's just not possible job wise"
"So get a job here then" replied Ryder.
"Yes, and that is easier said then done" said Kitty. "Not all of us can walk into a job provided by our big sis"
Ryder looked at her and laughed. "Okay yeah, whilst I admit it was sweet and totally cool for Mik and the others to let me work there. It's not going to be forever"
"Yeah, I know that" replied Kitty. "But still you have a foot in the door here in New York. I don't even have a toe in"
"Well maybe just keep an eye out, that is all I'm saying" said Ryder.
"I might" replied Kitty, with a nod. "However you are also forgetting that I do have a boyfriend in Chicago and well he might not be up for moving"
"Okay" said Ryder. "You do realize that none of us have even met this said boyfriend of yours"
"You will, when I think it's the right time" replied Kitty.
"And that will be when?" asked Ryder, looking at his sister.
"Soon, maybe" said Kitty.
"Rach and Puck's wedding?" asked Ryder.
Kitty looked at him and shook her head. "No way, I do not want my boyfriend to have the horror of meeting all my family at once. That will be way to scary for him and also me"
"Well you know I could always fly out to see you one weekend" said Ryder with a smile.
"You will not" replied Kitty.
"Can't stop me from taking a trip if I want" said Ryder.
"I will literally make sure you will never be able to have children in your future if you do that Ryder" replied Kitty.
"Okay chill out Kit Kat, just kidding" said Ryder with a laugh.
"You will get to meet him soon Ry; all of you will" said Kitty. "Just it's only been a few months and I want to make sure if I think it's worth going anywhere"
"But eventually right" said Ryder.
"Yes eventually if I think it will be a lasting one" replied Kitty. "And maybe I will also talk with him about the possibility of moving here to live as well"
"That be good" replied Ryder, with a nod; and the two of them continued to talk and eat the takeout, making the most of Kitty's last night in New York, at least for the time being.
End Note:
Any guesses as to who the boyfriend Kitty has is?! We did see him in the last season of Glee and, that is as much as I will say for now! Guesses welcome! :D
I obviously don't want to Mikki's issues to be a lasting thing, but I do think she really didn't come to terms with the fact that she did die just after her babies were born, so her fear was something that she really hadn't thought about and it was stopping her from completely connecting with Madison and Mason.
As for the others, Rachel and Puck's wedding will definitely be soon; and what about Brittany and Sam, what is on the cards for them!
You'll just have to keep reading to find out!
The next chapter will be up a lot sooner, I promise! Just have to do some last minutes additions/edits to it and I will have it up. Hopefully it will be by my time Friday!
Love always,
KJ xoxoxoxo