A huge thank you to Vamplover669 for allher ideas and input on this chapter! She is my muse! Also this chapter ha a little something for all pairings inclucing Penadette!
Saturday night is usually girls night for Amy , Penny and Bernadette but tonight Amy does not feel like joining in. After what happened at the banquet, and the mysterious grant that Sheldon does not want to talk about. Amy is not in the mood to hang out and begs off for the night. In an effort to cheer Sheldon up she has arranged for the guys to install TARDIS that was at her place to be at their apartment as a surprise.
To get him out of the house while it is done she takes him to the train store but he is so depressed not even the lure of tiny trains puts a smile on his face. He just mopes around the store and sighs, it is the same at the lego store and the comic book store.
"Come now Sheldon, cheer up a bit no harm was done. It was not nearly as embarrassing as the time you took the stage at The Chancellors Awards." Amy wheedles as he walks around the comic book store flipping through comics without really seeing them.
"You weren't there for that night so how would you know?" he asks walking over to a statue of Wonder Woman picking it up and then setting it down again.
"Howard showed me the Youtube video, it's the first time I ever saw you in your underwear." She teases him but he just cuts his eyes at her.
"It's not just that." He sighs.
"It is about the grant right? Listen it is your choice if you want to accept it or not and you know I will support you either way…"
"Will you though, if I turn down two million dollars, that would set our future nicely just as we are starting our lives together."
"Of course I would, you know I don't care about money. We are doing fine right now with out the grant money. I just wish you would tell me why you don't want to accept it you can talk to me." Amy gets a text alerting her that the work at the apartment is done and it is safe to go home. When they arrive Amy stops him at the threshold of the apartment door and covers his eyes with her hands.
"What are you doing?" he asks wearily.
"I have a surprise for you!" Amy tells him excited.
"I am sorry Amy but I am just not in the mood."he grouses as she opens the door and walks him inside still covering his eyes.
"Oh I think you will like this." Amy says walking him to the bedroom door and sliding her hands down his cheeks. His normally smooth face is covered with stubble and she finds it incredibly sexy.
"Amy is that the…" he begins happily.
"TARDIS!" Amy finishes. "Yes , I had the guys come install it over here. Do you like it?" she asks eagerly
"I am prepared to say that I love it."he says on awe as he tests the doors opening and closing them.
"Maybe you can dress up like and show me where to put the sonic screwdriver.?" Amy says coyly.
"The sonic screwdriver can go all over time , babe." He tells her slicking back his hair jokingly.
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"So Amy did not want to come out with us tonight?" Bernadette asks Penny as she pours her a glass of wine and hands it to her.
"No, she says that Sheldon is still felling pretty low from last night, so she is going to stay home and take care of him. Speaking of low, Leonard is feeling low because Sheldon got offered a grant almost triple of the money he raised. Leonard out together a whole lecture circuit, and delivered an amazing speech all Sheldon did was fall off a stage. "
"Tell me about it sister, Sheldon's got how feeling low with that little home video he accidentally watched."
"Why would that be?"
"Howard got to feeling pretty bad about his sexual prowess after watching it. So I tried to show him that we are every bit as adventurous as they are…" Bernadette begins pausing to sigh and take a sip of her wine.
"Oh Boy, what happened…"
"He threw out his back trying to lift me up and hold me against the door."
"Oh god! Leonard tried to do that to. I stopped it right away we are like the same height it would never work. Besides I have done that with Zack, it is vastly over rated." Penny tells her.
"Come on Penny."
"Okay it is incredibly hot and sexy but, it is not something I miss. I love Leonard and it means so much more when you are with someone you love."
"I know my college professor that I dated was almost six foot six and he could carry my around like a rag doll. Still your right the sex is better when you are with some one you love. I mean all that hot nasty adventurous stuff is fine when you are in your twenties and still experimenting…" Bernadette trails off staring into space.
"You miss it!" Penny says slapping her and snapping her out of her reverie.
"A little bit maybe…okay a lot a bit! I mean after Howard threw out his back, I still tried to make something happen by getting on top of him on the floor."
"Oh yeah how did that go?"
"He somehow pulled his hamstring and screamed for me to get off him."
"Leonard was so disturbed after seeing the movie he that has not been in the mood for three days." Penny tells her. "You know what we should do tonight?"
"I like you Penny but not that much." Bernadette says laughing and patting her arm consolingly.
"No, ewww…Bernadette!" Penny tells her slapping her arm away. "No we should go to the dirty store. Pick up a few things that might make the boys feel more adventurous."
"Ooohhh I like that idea, let's go." Bernadette says excited.
"You drive." Penny says gulping down the rest of her wine.
When they arrive at the store they are giggling like teenage girls and the bored looking clerk comes out to meet them. Her hair is dyed bright purple and she is wearing all black, her name tag says Natasha.
"Is there anything I can help you ladies find?" she asks sizing them up. "We have a great new strap-on that we just got in."
"Oh no we are not together." Bernadette squeaks. "Not that she isn't hot its just that I am married to a man and she is engaged to a man."
"We are looking for something to spice it up in the bedroom… with our men… not that being gay is bad I know lots of gay people… I'm just not."
"Spice it up how? We talking mild like strawberry flavored massage oils?" she says holding up gift set. "Or a little more crazy?" she says holding out a package.
"Vibrating pleasure eggs?" Penny reads wrinkling her nose.
"As read about in Fifty Shades of Grey , very popular with the married couples." She says smiling suggestively.
"What do they do?" Bernadette asks.
"Well you insert them inside you and they vibrate causing a build up of intense that when it comes time to make it to the bedroom you are beyond ready." She says licking her lips.
"Sounds interesting but I think we will just look around a bit." Bernadette says smiling tightly at her and walking away. "I think those are a little to extreme for me." Bernadette whispers to Penny as they walks away.
"So what are you thinking?" Penny asks her. "Maybe a sexy costume, this sailor one is really cute." Penny says holding it up.
"To close to the Sailor Moon he and Raj tag teamed at Comic Con try again." Bernadette tells her.
"Forgot about that, and you have already been a Catholic school girl. Honestly I think Leonard has been desensitized to sexy lingerie it may take a bit more to get his motor running again." Penny muses looking through the racks.
"Penny I think I have found it!" Bernadette says and Penny looks up and sees Bernadette swinging in a black chair that is suspended in a doorway. "Howie may not be able to lift me up but this is kind of the same thing." Bernadette says still sitting in the chair.
"Perfect! I will help you install it when we get back to your place." Penny says laughing at Bernadette."Now we just have to kind something for me."
"Actually, I think I have that covered too." Bernadette says hopping down and disappearing behind the doorway, then coming back and popping her head out. "Come with me." Penny follows her and claps her hands to her mouth as she sees Bernadette swinging from a stripper pole.
"Bernadette, you got the moves!" Penny says laughing.
"Took dance and gymnastics until I was eighteen, I am very bendy." She says turning upside down and shimming down the pole. "Collapsable pole, easy to install and I think it will knock Leonards socks off."
"You are right its is perfect. Plus I can install it in our extra room and use it to work out on when we are done with it."
"If he ever lets it out of the bedroom." Bernadette says winking at her. They go to ring up their purchases and the cashier looks impressed.
"I think your husbands will be very happy with your purchases." She tells them as she rings up them up.
"Bernadette!" Penny squeals holding up a tiny box that is sitting by the register. "Talk dirty to me dice we should get these for Amy. You know how much she and Sheldon like dice games."
"I don't think they need any of our help, but put them up there anyway." Bernadette says.
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Howard comes home tired from helping install the TARDIS door at Sheldon's apartment. He does not know why he volunteered it is not like Sheldon as been the best friend to him lately.
"Bernie I am home!" he calls as he enters the door.
"Upstairs!" Bernadette calls. "I've got a surprise for you."
"Aww, Bernie I don't know I am pretty tired."
"I think you will like it." She calls sweetly and Howard stomps up the stairs.
"Bernie, we can try but my back still really… " Howard stops dead in his tracks as he sees Bernadette swinging in the doorway of the bedroom wearing just a teddy. "Starting to feel better now." He says going up to her and kissing her. "Got a new toy did ya."
"You like it?" Bernadette asks between kisses.
"Like it? This is the sexiest thing ever." He says removing his clothes.
"I thought it might be easier on your back this way." She tells him kissing down his chest.
"It is going to be easier so I can go harder." Howard tells her and Bernadette giggles.
"Howie!"
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Leonard enters his apartment and he hears music playing from the bedroom curious he follows the sound. When he walks into the bedroom he sees penny leaning against a stripper pole wearing one of his white button down shirts and a tie.
"What's this?" he asks smiling.
"A little surprise for you." She says seductively taking his hand and leading him to the bed. "Now you just sit back and relax and I am going to put on a little show for you." She says and she fiddles with the IPad and the song "My Humps" starts playing. Penny starts wiggling against the pole seductively.
"What is this!" Leonard repeats this time more excited as Penny twirls around the pole then begins and loosens the tie and throws it at him.
"Just a little reward for doing such an awesome job last night." She says shimming up the pole and spinning back down again. Then she does a seductively dance as she unbuttons the buttons of the shirt and lets it fall to the floor revealing red lace underwear.
"I should five speeches more often." He says practically panting as she spins around the pole one more time.
"You should you are so good at them." She says and the song changes to "London Bridge" and she gets on his lap and starts giving him a lap dance.
"This is better than a strip club because I can touch you." He says grabbing her bottom and squeezing.
"You don't go to strip clubs." She tells him rubbing her breasts in his face.
"Why would I need to, I have got you." he says looking up at her with utter devotion in his eyes and Penny looks down at him and kisses him.
"You really are a good guy you know that?"
"Yeah I am a good guy but it is time to do dirty things to you." He says flipping her over on the bed.
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The next morning at work the Raj is sitting at their normal breakfast table and he is joined by Howard who gives him a dreamy.
"Hey." He says smiling and staring off in the distance
"Hi you look like you are in a good mood." Raj comments drily when they are joined by Leonard who also sits down and lets out a sigh.
"Wonderful morning." He says spooning cereal into his mouth.
"What got into you two?" Raj asks.
"Bernadette felt bad about how I felt after watching that sex tape and she bought bus a sex swing, I let me tell you daddy like…." Howard says.
"Penny bought a stripper pole and gave me a little strip tease last night." Leonard says.
"Wow , sounds like you two should be thanking Sheldon." Raj comments. "Speaking of which he should be here by now." Raj says looking around. By the end of breakfast Sheldon still has not shown and Leonard starts to get worried.
"Maybe I should go up to his office and see if he is okay?" he might still think that I am mad at him. Leonard says tossing his bag over his shoulder and heading to Sheldon's office.
Sheldon stands at his whiteboard contemplating an equation written on it, so deep in thought he does not notice the wrapping on his office door. Leonard pops his head in and startles him when he says hello. They have not spoken since the night of the banquet, since they no longer live together their lives have been intersecting less.
"Hey buddy you got a minute?" Leonard asks him, Sheldon stare at him confused for a moment trying to shake off his reverie.
"Yes, of course come in." He tells him.
"About Friday night…"
"Yes my behavior was reprehensible, I am sorry I did not call to apologize to you sooner but I have had a lot on my mind."
"That's kind of what I wanted to talk to you about, what you have had on your mind… I heard about the grant."
"Did you also hear that I may not accept it?" he asks.
"Yeah I did, may I ask why?"
"It is not your normal grant Leonard, I fear it is some sort of Indecent Proposal type situation.."
"What are you going on about?"
"Faisal, Leonard, Faisal." He says capping is marker and pacing his office.
"So… he seemed like a nice enough guy."
"Oh yes he is very charming and sweet for a Saudi dilettante, who once wanted to wed my woman!"
"Faisal is a philanthropist he donates money to a lot of things. Besides Siebert told me that the donation was made anonymously here no way to be certain that it was Faisal that gave the grant."
"Oh really Leonard? Because the only person I even told about my research was him. He was more than happy to tell me how he wishes Amy to be one of his virgins."
"Sheldon do you trust Amy?" Leonard asks him.
"Implicitly." He says shaking his head.
"Then you know that no matter what the cause Amy would never stray from you. There is no way that Faisal can demand that would make her leave you. It is against academic code for you to accept the grant and then have him swoop in and demand favors from Amy. It is against all codes of ethics." Leonard assures him.
" I guess I have bee acting irrationally." Sheldon tells him sitting on his desk.
"Yes very, irrationally so you should accept the grant and if you chose to send some of it my way to assuage your guilt…" Leonard says shrugging his shoulders.
"Nice Try." Sheldon tells him smiling.