Chapter 30

Lily.

Crying.

"Ugh get used to this."

25 weeks

Tobias continues to kiss my neck.

I sigh and try to convince myself to ignore it.

'What if this was your child?'

'What a great mother you are, just leaving a baby out there, unsupervised, while you two get dirty.'

But thoughts run through my head.

"Nope." I sigh.

He stops and looks at me with a sad yet mischievous look.

Lily is still crying.

Tobias puts his hand on my stomach and worms his hand down.

Fuck he knows i love this.

He sets low and moves up and down me while kissing my ear.

I take control and flip us over.

Lily lets out a heartfelt cry and I stop and look at Tobias.

"She's okay." Tobias whispers in my ear.

"No, we've got to check her." I firmly say.

I swing my legs off the bed and put a top on.

Tobias groans and rolls around.

I walk out and Lily is sniffling.

"Shhhhh, its okay." I shush her as I cradle her.

She opens her eyes and giggles as I bounce her around.

Tobias walks out and leans against the doorframe as he watches me.

"Could you please put the kettle on? She might be hungry." I ask Tobias as he watches with glistening eyes.

"Sure mum." He walks over to me and firmly kisses me on the head.

"Not yet." I laugh.

"But soon." Tobias smiles.

I pace around the room softly bouncing her.

Lily lets out a little yawn and closes her eyes.

"I'll just put her in the cot." I tell Tobias.

I walk into the nursery and lay her down into one of our cots.

Her arms outstretch and her hand curl around my finger.

I'm gonna have one of these soon.

I grab a baby blanket out of the cupboard and I lay it over her.

I hear footsteps behind me and I feel strong arms clutch me.

I look up and the usual loving face is put to good use.

Tobias kisses my temple and I slide my face across his.

I put my arms around his neck and press my lips against his.

"So where were we?"

—

(45 minutes or so later 😉😏)

"Coffee?" Tobias yells out as I put some clothes on.

"Yes please!'

I walk out to the kitchen and pour a glass of water.

"I'll go check on Lily." I say.

I walk over to her and she's fast asleep

She looks so peaceful.

I walk back out to Tobias.

"She okay?" Tobias asks.

"Yup, she's beautiful."

He smiles at me.

"Just like you." He says as he passes me the coffee.

This coffee bench has had a lot of important questions brought to attention, so I decide to bring up the big elephant in our relationship at the moment;

"So, this wedding." I instigate.

Tobias leans against the island and lets out a sigh.

"Don't you think we've got enough to worry about?"

"Well yeah but do we wanna have it before or after." I finish the sentence gesturing towards my womb.

Tobias walks over to me and kisses my forehead.

"Lets talk about this later."

I frown and ponder.

"Why are you putting it off?" I snap.

Damn hormones.

He stops in his tracks and frowns for a second before his trademark looks takes over;

Understanding, compassion and tolerance.

"I just don't wanna stress you anymore than what you are." He looks down at me in a scrutinising, pitiful gaze.

"I'm not made out of glass Tobias!" I state.

He takes a step back and shoots me a surprised, confused look.

I push myself off the stool and wobble, Tobias reaches out to catch but I take a step away.

Great timing feet.

"I don't need you to bubble wrap me all the time! I'm not a little kid." I look away.

He takes a step towards me but I back away.

"Tris, hey." He says to get me to look at him.

I look up into his big brown eyes but stay hasty.

"I just don't want you to get hurt." He tries reaching to touch my shoulder but I decline.

"Well its a little late for that isn't it?" I spit as I refer to my pregnancy.

His eyes go bashful and I regret it.

He straightens his back and that bashful look disappears.

"You're pregnant, Tris. I don't want anything to happen to you. A wedding would only cause more stress than what is already upon us. I'm sorry if I baby you but you're so fragile to me."

He cautiously steps forward and continues.

"You're carrying two of my children, you three are the most important things in my life and I don't know what I'd do without you! We'll talk about it later." He firmly dismisses.

"No! You can't keep-" I stop when Lilly interrupts crying.

I shriek and stomp my foot knowing that he won.

He glares at me as I turn around and attend to Lilly.

As I walk towards the nursery I feel my eyes water and my face turn red.

I close the door behind me and my knees fail so I slide down the door.

I let out quiet sobs that turn into a hot, blubbery mess.

I stay there until my aching back begins to hurt again.

Lilly is still crying with a red face and squirming arms.

I wipe my eyes and pick up the delicate, wailing baby.

"Shhhhhh it's okay."

I attempt to console but I fail, she only cries louder.

My ears pierce as I pace and gently bounce her.

"Come on Lilly please." I will.

She restlessly continues.

My hormones keep spiking until I'm reduced to sobbing again.

My vision blurs and body weakens.

"Please stop crying."

She lets out a gurgled scream and I continue pacing.

The door slowly opens and Tobias stands in the doorway with a concerned look.

I sniff and quickly wipe my eyes.

I'm too slow and Tobias smiles but it doesn't reach his eyes.

He walks over with outstretched arms.

"Here, you go get a bottle." He says as I pass him the wailing baby.

He rocks and taps her and she suddenly stops crying.

I walk to the kitchen and the tears don't stop.

What's wrong with me?

I flick the kettle on and grab some tissues.

I hear no more sounds of distress or screaming.

Tobias walks out and quietly shuts the nursery door.

I turn around to hide my blotchy, red face but I know he's already seen it.

"I'm sorry Tris, I didn't mean to yell I ju-just." He stutters.

I walk over to the pram to grab the formula and bottle.

I begin to make the formula and test it on my wrist.

"I love you and don't want anything to happen to you or our children."

He continues as I navigate my large belly towards the nursery.

"I'd love to talk about the wedding as soon as we get the chance."

He grabs my wrist as I reach for Lilly.

I face him and look into his pleading eyes.

"I'm sorry." I whimper as I walk into his hug.

He pulls back to kiss my nose.

"It's okay." He assures.

I pull back and scoop Lilly up.

She's smiles and stretches her hand out to me.

I sit down into the chair and she begins to suckle on the bottle.

Tobias walks over and drops down to his knees to see Lilly.

"God she's a little champ." he states as she devours the bottle.

I laugh and nod to agree.

"Are you gonna breastfeed? Well, do you want to?" He asks with a hint of bashfulness.

I'd hadn't really thought about it but it was pretty obvious.

"Yeah of course." I reassure with a smile.

He grins widely.

"I'm glad."

"I mean I don't see why some people don't, what would be the point of having them then?"

ki,